birthday wishes

hello friends. a few of you have asked me what i would like to have for my birthday, and, honestly, i haven't thought about it! But then you say it'll be a whole lot easier if i could just SAY it and you could just GET it and there would be an ideal match between producer and consumer to achieve IDEAL supply-demand intersection- and maximize satisfaction for you and i! haha. what a perfect world.

so i will try. (all i want for birthday is my.. two front teeth!) (hmm.)
1. ok... this is hard.. ahah!

1. an English Standard Version bible? (siah la, later i say here i get 3 of the same thing, then how?!)

one down!

2. err, shoes? flats? those kind i can wear to school easily. Currently i have two pairs of flats, and they both stink. Er, okay... you didnt know that. Ask me bout the size!

3. the PERFECT shade of creamy light natural pink nailpolish. But let me forewarn you that i have tried looking for those since last May, and.. they're still on this I Want! list in March 2008. haha.

actually, i think im a normal hormonal total local (what else rhymes!) haha kind of girl. So girly stuff (NOT PINK!! except the nail polish.) like... clothes, bags, perfume, shoes, belts, clothes (oops. i mentioned that already) would be good! BUT i know... that everytime you buy a mother's day gift you hear the same things, and you still never know what to get. okay, felicia. break it down. you know one of the reasons why i kinda hate writing this? I feel so narcissistic!! oh gosh. help.

4. bags. can fit A4 size, medium brown with burnished gold zips/details= no bright gold zip! saw a nice one from charles n keith actually. i have this perfect one in my head, which i can never quite find in the shops. haha. maybe im too fussy huh. oh dear. dont worry i shall be more embracing! 'ohh, you preetty little thing :)'

5. printed long A-line skirt?

6. Beyond Paradise perfume / Lolita Lempicka perfume / Clinique Simply perfume

7. A nice necklace?

8. cuff bracelets? the golden a little chunky bangle kind, not the frilly fragile ones i know i will break in like 2 days.

9. dark denim jeans. but honestly.. not wise to buy this unless u ask me to try it first

10. books! those that win the pulitzer prize/ booker prize are normally good. architecture books! invisible cities/ something with many pretty pictures. heh.

haha alrighty. ten is a good place to stop. unless its..

Eleven! anything you put thought to will be appreciated! anything outside this list, anything i can use is well, useful, and so! A BIG THANK YOU :D thank you friends, will get the invites out soooon!

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29th March, Saturday
630 - 11pm
Faber Crest Condominium, Function Room

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How to get there:
1. From clementi mrt, (taxi stand outside where Macdonalds used to be) white shuttle bus comes at 6.45pm, 7.15pm and 7.45pm. (last bus)

2. From clementi mrt, take a cab, and tell uncle ' Jalan Lempeng, Faber Heights.'
Shouldn't cost you more than $4.

Stop at the guard entrance, turn right and you'll see the clubhouse. Where you'll find us!

If in doubt, call me!

xo. feli

p.s. Please rsvp by 23rd March, as i will be catering food per head. :) thanks.

moment flashes

there are some blogs which make you happy. there is an air of ease about them- honest, alive, quirky, moving, poignant, inspiring. and there are others who try very hard to be happy, that try very hard to impress, that are cluttered with 'what i did today so read all about me' -

and i guess i can't make up my mind why i blog, still.
i cant decide if i blog to conceal or to reveal.

i think if i didn't know Jesus i'd be a depressed kid.
haha. i always thought of life as a kind of masquerade,
and people as a whole lot of layers compressed into moments-
because i can never truly get into someone else's head and see life through it
i can never feel the emotion they are trying to describe,
or recollect the memories that shape the fibres of their character.

i can only piece a moving picture from the snippets of people i know
i can only know you through flashes, through moments,
through the glances, slits of daylight, the smile of amusement, the laughter
of jokes, which is different from the laughter of deep familiarity,

and the in-between is filled with a lot of assumptions, of attempts
to scrape beneath the surface.

blur vs. being.

trying to concoct a memorable phrase,
stringing words together in a delicate fashion
is difficult.

because most days i feel like i haven't got much to say
and other days i'm more caught up with doing
than stopping, to reflect.
most days are a blur,
and i always thought of meditation
as those times when we stand still,

letting things spin and whirl around us.
so that God, from heaven,
looks down and sees us,
still, quiet, waiting

rather than a blur of speed and noise,
of excess and confusion.

so wait.

stop.

breathe.

maybe then we'll see
what we were meant to be.