|
disclaimer
MY BLOG,MY SAY.OKAY???. |
introduction
shahzan,19!!.. i'm a drum and bass kinda guy. music is passion. |
tagboard
|
archives
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
September 2009
October 2009
November 2009
December 2009
January 2010
February 2010
March 2010
April 2010
May 2010
June 2010
July 2010
August 2010
September 2010
October 2010
December 2010
March 2011
April 2011
June 2011
July 2011
October 2011
November 2011
December 2011
January 2012
March 2012
April 2012
May 2012
July 2012
September 2014
friends
BasirahMaya Sol FarahD khairi Apit Zeeroc Awin Ramona Shafwan Nadzirah helmii albania Aidil J EEK MYRA eir mel hani iskandar e-carr unknown blogger Shidaaah :D . credits
layout reflect-ionbasecodes inkSPLASH icon coquettish |
|
Friday, September 19, 2014
12:24 AM
Hi blog, Almost 2 years has passed. A lot had changed since the last entry. I'm now a working adult. I have a proper job, a totally different lifestyle. But i keep the things I love close to me still. I've found and lost some of the most precious people in my life. And it's been a roller coaster ride but it was worth every moment of it. I miss this space. I miss just having somewhere to share all my thoughts and feelings without the fear of not having it heard or judged. It is where i get to clear my mind. At this junction of my life, I would say i am pretty torn by the lost of the lady I loved, the person I thought I would end up settling down with. But i've learnt from life enough from before, that i know life have to go on and one day all this will pass. I've learnt that, life has no guarantees. Anything can change at any point of time. And the lost had reminded me to be content with what i have and there is always a positive side to everything. Even pain. I am happy. I am grateful. I truly am. I would just want to learn to forgive her, and myself, for what ever that had happened between the both of us; something i find very hard to accomplish. I guess it is too soon and I've not recover from it. And i want to truly be happy for her, with who ever she might be, with what ever she is doing. Because that would really what i think love is. I hope i find peace in myself as i have did in the past. Tuesday, July 10, 2012
3:39 AM
Sometimes, you just have to keep some things to yourself. As much as it pains you to, just to swallow it down.. And just hope you'll get so numb by it, you wiuld'nt notice it anymore..
Sunday, May 6, 2012
11:25 PM
Dear best friend,
I am writing this out purely from the heart,
no hatred, no grudge.
We've been friends for 4 years, and you've been my best friend since,
even without official words, I've always regard you as one.
because everyday, we'll always have each other's back, each other's shoulder to cry on, each other's ears to hear us out.
We talked almost every day, never getting tired..
Sure, there was awkward tensions now and then because we didn't know what was going on. But we got it cleared up. And you, you were the best girl best friend a guy could ever wished for.
We had a friendship like those we read on tumblr and shit.. We were that.
I never thought I'd see the day those would end.
But it did, life goes on and we moved on..
As much as it pains me, I chose to understand because, that's what friends do. If i were to follow this girly heart of mine, I'd make a big deal out of it. You said we gap since I found her, I can't deny because I was always with her when you called for me.
Now you found the one, I'm very much happy for you.
And if our friendship is the price to pay for that, I am willing.. sincerely..
Because that's what best friends do.
But my dear friend, do understand..
I've longed for you all this time you weren't here.
I missed you badly.
Every single time that I thought of sharing with you, I had to take it back. Because I don't want to ruin what you have.
I took every precious chance I could to contact you
and never for granted. Even at times when I just feel like venting my anger of how mad I am that I cant have you to myself any more. But it's too precious to be doing that.
Best friend, all I'm saying is that I appreciate what we had,
Those times could never been better.
But if you think severing this already thin string of ties we have makes you feel any good, by all means..
I just hope you think about if I'm really not understanding of the position that you are in now. And think about if "we", actually meant anything to you.
I know this sounds super cheesy, girly, whatever. But it's just how I really feel. I think you already know that.
Sincerely,
your best friend.
Friday, April 27, 2012
10:48 PM
I'm sorry if I make you feel like you are not needed.
Fact is, you are.
I'm sorry if I'm never nice to you.
I'm trying to be.
I'm sorry if I make you feel worthless.
Trust me, you're more than worthy and worth it.
I'm sorry if I seem to not care.
The truth is I care too much.
I'm sorry if it seems like we're drifting apart.
it's just that time is not on our side, for now.
I'm sorry,
I love you..
Sunday, April 1, 2012
12:32 AM
it seems to always be an issue for me in my social life. Maybe it's just that i have problems with people generally. I am too sensitive towards everything. I don't take words of wisdom from people who think they're wise. I don't appriciate brags of a bold actions. Why be proud of something that took you nowhere? You are where you are for your own words and actions. No pride nor progress in that. And to be surrounded by ignorant fools really takes it's toll. I just want to do my time and fly away.. Away from here..But i know, things would be worst than it is, if i didn't have that someone to always be there for me to give me strength. And i love her si much for always be my pillar of strength. Happy 14th my dear. You've been more than what a man can ask for, more than just a gift in my life. Monday, March 26, 2012
4:16 PM
Everything seems dark from where I am. I can't see where I'm heading. Well, not clear at least. All I have are flickering sparks of ideas and close ones, giving me clues to what lies in front, but I need more; inspirations and and proper directions.. time and space. When i feel lost and almost alone, I give the stars; what I call those flickering sparks, a gaze. May time and prayer answer all my doubts, and may my mind and body help me out. For one can only make it on his own, using just what life has shown. Monday, January 23, 2012
11:07 AM
Time spent with you are very hard to get.. And when there are, it's always short lived. But i appriciate them alot. More than u actually know. It may sometime seem that i expect more, but to tell u the truth, what you give is more than i could ever ask for.. I never cared of what you give, Because to me the initiative itself already caught my heart. The birthday was amazing. How you planned the whole thing.. Buts its not the gift that i look upon, Just the act of giving, is what i love the most. Thank my dear Shareena.. To many more ahead :) | |||
| colours to dull. |