Dear best friend,

I am writing this out purely from the heart,

no hatred, no grudge.

We've been friends for 4 years, and you've been my best friend since,

even without official words, I've always regard you as one.

because everyday, we'll always have each other's back, each other's shoulder to cry on, each other's ears to hear us out.

We talked almost every day, never getting tired.. 

Sure, there was awkward tensions now and then because we didn't know what was going on. But we got it cleared up. And you, you were the best girl best friend a guy could ever wished for.

We had a friendship like those we read on tumblr and shit.. We were that.

I never thought I'd see the day those would end.

But it did, life goes on and we moved on..

As much as it pains me, I chose to understand because, that's what friends do. If i were to follow this girly heart of mine, I'd make a big deal out of it. You said we gap since I found her, I can't deny because I was always with her when you called for me.

Now you found the one, I'm very much happy for you.

And if our friendship is the price to pay for that, I am willing.. sincerely..

Because that's what best friends do.

But my dear friend, do understand..

I've longed for you all this time you weren't here.

I missed you badly.

Every single time that I thought of sharing with you, I had to take it back. Because I don't want to ruin what you have.

I took every precious chance I could to contact you

and never for granted. Even at times when I just feel like venting my anger of how mad I am that I cant have you to myself any more. But it's too precious to be doing that.

Best friend, all I'm saying is that I appreciate what we had,

Those times could never been better.

But if you think severing this already thin string of ties we have makes you feel any good, by all means..

I just hope you think about if I'm really not understanding of the position that you are in now. And think about if "we", actually meant anything to you.

I know this sounds super cheesy, girly, whatever. But it's just how I really feel. I think you already know that.

Sincerely,

your best friend.

I'm sorry if I make you feel like you are not needed.

Fact is, you are.

I'm sorry if I'm never nice to you.

I'm trying to be.

I'm sorry if I make you feel worthless.

Trust me, you're more than worthy and worth it.

I'm sorry if I seem to not care.

The truth is I care too much.

I'm sorry if it seems like we're drifting apart.

it's just that time is not on our side, for now.

 

I'm sorry,

I love you..

 

I can't see where I'm heading. Well, not clear at least.

All I have are flickering sparks of ideas and close ones,

giving me clues to what lies in front, but I need more;

inspirations and and proper directions.. time and space.

When i feel lost and almost alone, I give the stars; what I call those flickering

sparks, a gaze.

May time and prayer answer all my doubts,

and may my mind and body help me out.

For one can only make it on his own,

using just what life has shown.

Time spent with you are very hard to get..

And when there are, it's always short lived.

But i appriciate them alot. More than u actually know.

It may sometime seem that i expect more,

but to tell u the truth, what you give is more than i could ever ask for..

I never cared of what you give,

Because to me the initiative itself already caught my heart.

The birthday was amazing.

How you planned the whole thing..

Buts its not the gift that i look upon,

Just the act of giving, is what i love the most.

Thank my dear Shareena..

To many more ahead :)