At The Altar

 

At The Altar

Anger and grudges are hard to reconcile with the word of God. It is especially difficult when the object of your anger is your brother. This is from January 5, 2011. I hope they made up!

My sophomore Gospels class today quizzed over Matthew 5:13-30. One of the questions covered verses 23-24 where Jesus stated this:
“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift."
We came to the conclusion that although giving to the Lord is of great importance, Jesus told us that making it right with your brother or sister carried even greater weight. We discussed that some of them (the kids) are angry and they we need to fix the problem with the other person, whether of the spiritual family or biological clan. I saw a short story tonight on Sports Illustrated's website about two brothers that really grieved me. Darryl and Brent Sutter are two of the amazing six brothers in the family who all played in the National Hockey League. Until very recently, they worked together as general manager and coach of the Calgary Flames. Darryl has resigned his position and the two are not speaking although Brent says he has reached out through texts. Working together is sometimes hazardous to family harmony and I know nothing about hockey but I know brothers. After a certain age, you aren't going to get any more. I don't think there could be any better illustration of Jesus' teaching than the Sutters. Maybe it's more difficult to reconcile if you are a public figure but Jesus did not make an exception for the famous. I hope they make up before it's too late. If they do, it would be a great illustration of an altar call.

Applicable quote of the day # 1:
"When brothers agree, no fortress is so strong as their common life."
Antisthenes

Applicable quote of the day # 2:
"It takes two men to make one brother."
Israel Zangwill

God bless,
Steve (Brother of Dave and Scott)
Luke 18:1

In Praise Of Nurses

 

In Praise Of Nurses

There was a stretch years ago where every time I went to St. Louis to be with my folks, something happened to Mom. As someone who had never spent time in a hospital, it was not always easy watching others be in charge of my mother. I wrote the following during a Spring Break visit and  it ran March 13, 2006. 

Yesterday was long. I spent seven hours in Mom's hospital room. During my lifetime, I have infrequently been in hospital settings, either as visitor or patient. My mother is undergoing tests to determine why she passed out two days ago. It has been a blessing for me to be here in St. Louis. It takes some of the burden off of my father and I have been able to spend time with Mom, albeit in a manner I would not have chosen. The hardest part of Mom's Alzheimer's for me is the role reversal. Yesterday, Mom had two choices. She could stay in bed or she could sit in a chair. Since she was hooked up to an IV drip, she had to remain relatively immobile. At least twenty times, she tried to get up and walk away; I had to restrain her. Mom kept tugging at the heart monitor attached to her; I had to repeatedly intervene. Even though I understand it's for her well-being, it is very difficult for me to take the position of the adult when it comes to Mom. If there is a bright side, it is that she tries to be cooperative and please those caring for her. That part of her personality the Alzheimer's has not been able to penetrate.

That brings me to the nurses. Seeing others care for a loved one is not easy but the nurses attending to Mom have been incredible. They come in a variety of ages and ethnicities but they have this in common: they are extraordinary in the protection of the aged. In 1st Corinthians 13, the first two definitions of love given by Paul are patience and kindness. Those descriptions fit the women watching over my mother as if tailor-made. Their touch is tender and never rough or brusque. They speak gently to her, calling her by name. They let her speak, even though much of what she says is incoherent. They make eye contact with her and let her maintain dignity. They deal with thousands of patients per year but I left feeling my mother was viewed as an individual with worth and value. And so, to the nursing staff on the seventh floor of the DePaul Health Center in St. Louis, I say the only word befitting one in my position- THANKS. You have blessed my family as I am sure you have blessed many families. I know you don't get paid enough but it isn't a paycheck you chase. You help the world, one patient, one family, one crisis at a time. You do it with class and you do it with empathy. And you did it for my mother.

Applicable quote of the day:
"Constant attention by a good nurse may be just as important as a major operation by a surgeon."
Dag Hammarskjold (Former Secretary General of the United Nations)

God bless,
Steve
Luke 18:1

The Shedding Of Blood

 

The Shedding Of Blood

This is about an incident at Jos A Bank.  It is from December 22, 2011.

Last Saturday, I was once again lured into my new favorite store, Jos A Bank, by the offer of BUY ONE, GET TWO FREE! Since I love their Traveler dress shirts, it was a natural for me to check out what they had for sale. I reached into a stack of size 15.5"/34" shirts to see if they were of the button down variety. Suddenly, I felt a sharp stinging sensation on my left hand. I had been gashed in two places on a finger by one of the many stick pins used to precisely hold these shirts in a perfectly folded position. My finger immediately started leaking blood. Also in the store at the same time were my good friends, Becki and Randy Glover.  I assumed being a typical mom/grandmom would require Becki to have a Band-Aid in her purse but Becki was empty in the bandage department. I found Silvia, the lovely sales lady who always helps me, and she was able to round up several adhesive strips to staunch the flow of blood.  Pressure was applied to the mini gashes and the Band-Aid did its work. I was able to continue my shopping experience unimpaired and walked away with three shirts, two of which were free!

Do you know what I was afraid of when I pricked myself? I was worried I would get blood on those shirts and no one would buy them. I mean, who would spend money on a shirt stained by the blood of an unknown donor? (Knowing my penchant for feeling guilty, I might even buy shirts in the wrong color/size/style simply because I would feel responsible!) And yet, as believers, we know our only hope is to be dressed in garments washed in the blood of the Lamb of God. My blood ruins; His blood saves. What a gift from above! Merry Christmas to all.

Applicable quote of the day:
"“The thorn from the bush one has planted, nourished and pruned pricks more deeply and draws more blood.” 
Maya Angelou 

God bless,
Steve

Luke 18:1

Shirts By Sally

 

Shirts By Sally

I owe a great deal to my two sisters-in-law. This entry from September 5, 2011, is about one of them.
I did something today I thought I would never do. This morning, I went to the Jos A Bank store in Meyerland Plaza and bought three shirts. My sister-in-law, Sally, has kindly chided me the past several years for buying what I wear at a certain clothing store. Her point has been that to get quality, you have to pay more but you're better off in the long run. I've noticed that the white dress shirts I have purchased at the other establishment don't last very long in the wardrobe wear-and-tear of a classroom teacher so I've begun to give credence to Sally's mentoring. Sally's husband, my brother, Dave, is a big Jos A Bank advocate and customer. They were having a terrific Labor Day sale and I had no school so it was a perfect apparel storm. Silvia, the lady waiting on me, could not have been more pleasant and helpful. She measured me and found I've been wearing a size slightly too large. We also spoke about WCS and her son who had attended one of our sister schools. We talked of the need for instructors to dress professionally in the classroom. I walked out of Jos A Bank with three 017170910149 Traveler Button Down White 15.5  34 shirts and the feeling I had made a wise investment. I have Sally and Silvia to thank.

This week in class, I told my classes that I go to a Vietnamese lady who cuts my hair for three dollars. I don't know a girl who would let someone who charges that much touch their crowning glory. I told how my Lasik eye surgery cost a little over $2,000 but that I would never go to a doctor who only charges one hundred dollars per eye; I wouldn't feel safe. Judging value and quality of goods is a theme of the Old Testament and Sally is terrific at judging value and quality. I think the wife of noble character in Proverbs 31 fits her to a T in its description of a woman who takes care of her family in all aspects of their lives. I know Sally loves me even though I'm pretty sure she does not understand me. (For some reason, she didn't comprehend why I slept on top of the comforter last Christmas so she wouldn't have to wash the sheets.) She even graciously relented and put my picture on the refrigerator. (See http://stevehawley.blogspot.com/2011/04/she-promised.html#comments for an explanation.) And I know she is looking out for my best interests when she tells me where I should buy my clothes. I'm blessed to have a number of Sallys in my life, folks I trust implicitly, who are not afraid to weigh in when it comes to what is best for me. And this evening as we speak, Sally is with Dave in New York at the US Open. Rumor has it, they have amazingly great seats for tonight's matches. Good for Sally; a wife of noble character deserves nothing less.

Applicable quote of the day:
"Where quality is the thing sought after, the thing of supreme quality is cheap, whatever the price one has to pay for it."
William James

God bless,
Steve
Luke 18:1

The Party's Over

 

The Party's Over

I talk in my classes about the first husband and wife. I asked them if they thought Eve was beautiful- most think she was. I told them the biggest decision we make after committing to follow Christ is who we marry and that it is a lifelong vow. Not everyone shares that sentiment as you will see in the following entry which I penned on December 5, 2006.

The headline jumped out at me. I was catching up with my reading, surveying the interesting parts of this Sunday's Houston Chronicle newspaper. It was in the Lifestyle section, directly above announcements for engagements and Golden Wedding anniversaries.
You, Too, Can Celebrate The End Of A Marriage In Style
Beneath it, the subtitle read, 
Divorce parties aren't just for the stars anymore.
The story centered on a growth industry: throwing parties for those whose marriages unravel to the point of dissolution. Andrew Wintner, an executive for one of these specialty companies, summarized the focus of his business:
"Instead of celebrating the end of someone's freedom, we'll be celebrating the beginning of their freedom."
The article included a picture of a laughing ex-wife, enjoying herself tremendously with an appropriately decorated divorce cake. Ironically, there was no mention of God, vows, or 'til death do us part' in the short feature. They must have been edited out due to space constraints. 

A few nights back, my phone rang past the time when I get called. It was a familiar voice on the other end. She played high school basketball for me in rural Georgia. After graduation, she married a young man, another of my students, and she was living her dream life as a wife and mother. It came crashing down on her in 2005 when her beloved husband collapsed and died. At thirty-seven, she became a widow with a ten year old daughter and a thirteen year old son. Compounding her grief was an accident two weeks ago which left her father-in-law in the ICU with her kids facing the possibility of losing their saintly grandfather along with their dad. She needed to talk and I needed to listen. That's what coaches do when the uniforms are packed away for the last time. This morning, I took a class period and had my students write my former player and offer condolences as well as hope. As part of the process, I encourage them to tell their life stories as a way of sharing their own heartaches as well as triumphs. They did, sometimes painfully so. One young lady told of her parent's bitter divorce and what precipitated it. She called the experience, "the hardest thing in my life." The destruction of the marriage of her mother and father has, by her own admission, devastated her but she is a tough kid and she will make it.

That's what was missing from the divorce party story. There was no mention of the children. No talk of custody battles. No discussion of kids requiring counseling. I understand intellectually that divorce happens and you have to move on but to seemingly mock the situation belittles the ones who have no say so in the outcome. Riding to a basketball game this afternoon, one of my current players and I were talking about marriage and she told me whoever she married must have parents. That's parents...plural. She has come from a background of terrible family suffering and she knows what will be best for her. I wish they would have asked this thirteen year old for a quote in that article. She would have shed some light from the perspective of the victims. They don't throw a party for them.


Applicable quote of the day:
"It's my party and I'll cry if I want to,
Cry if I want to,
Cry if I want to,You would cry, too, if it happened to you."
Lesley Gore (from It's My Party- 1963)


God bless,
Steve
Luke 18:1

King Kong And Christmas

 

King Kong And Christmas

Every family has holiday traditions and so does ours. The following entry, from 12-26-05, is about a Christmas tradition surrounding the birthday of my nephew, Seth.

I am terrible at remembering birthdays. I know those of my folks, my siblings, and several people who share my big day but that's it. There is one exception. I know the birthday of my nephew, Seth. The middle child of my brother, Scott, and his wife, Karen, Seth was introduced to the world on Christmas Eve, 1986. To make sure his birthday is not overlooked, Scott and Karen have always gone to lengths to make sure we celebrate it. When he was young, it was Chucky Cheese and a movie. Now that he is a high school senior, Chucky Cheese has fallen by the wayside but the trek to the theater has remained. It's always Seth's choice. With advice from slightly older cousin, Ben, Seth opted yesterday for the Hawleys to take in this year's holiday blockbuster, King Kong. I rarely go to the movies but I will attempt a short Ebert and Roper-like review for those of you deciding how to spend your time off and your entertainment dollar:

King Kong is a three hour extravaganza that seems like four. It could have been cut in half and no one would have been any wiser. The special effects are incredible at times- the final showdown on the Empire State Building took me to the brink of nausea. There are the required heroes and villains and those who can go either way. Naomi Watts is absolutely stunning in reprising the role Fay Ray made famous in the 1933 version. Kong is a misunderstood monster who directly or indirectly is responsible for the deaths of hundreds. Jack Black as the huckster Carl Denham closes the movie with the most predictable line in the history of cinema. I never fell asleep but the thought crossed my mind. Seth succinctly summed up King Kong as we exited the Des Peres Cinema with his own unique teenage wisdom: "Ben, you owe us seven dollars!"

I realize many of you will disagree with my assessment but critics aren't in the business to make friends! King Kong will make money and little kids will love it but to me, it typifies our society. Make it bigger, flashier, and more expensive. Make the chases longer and more outlandish. What would the story of the Savior's birth have been like had Hollywood written the script? We can rest assured it would have been more exciting than an obscure couple in a little-known village in an oppressed part of the world. It's not that the messiah was not anticipated-it's just that the scenario was misinterpreted. The movie trailers pique our interest for upcoming attractions. The scriptures also had trailers but they called them prophecies. Movie characters are larger-than-life. Jesus was life personified. You couldn't miss Kong- the theater shook when he was introduced. Most people could and did miss the appearing of the one who loved all the unattractive and not just one breathtaking blonde. In the end, Kong dies and his story dies with him. When he hits the pavement, his obituary is written. Jesus dies, too, but that's just Act One. There's a sequel, you know. They call it The Greatest Story Ever Told. It won't just hang around for two months before retiring to Blockbuster Video like King Kong. It has a playing date throughout eternity. Movies live and die on the basis of self-appointed media experts. Positive comments sway public opinion and perhaps turn an average effort into a money making phenomenon. Jesus had the greatest review of all-time, the alpha and omega of reviews. I humbly close this Christmas night with these words from Matthew 3:17, heard only by a crowd on the banks of the Jordan River roughly 2,000 years ago:
"And a voice from heaven said, 'This is my son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased.' " 

Applicable quote of the day:
"Pleased as man with men to dwell,
Jesus, our Emmanuel!"
Isaac Watts (from Hark, The Herald Angels Sing)

PS: I give this entry two thumbs up!

God bless and Merry Christmas,
Steve
Luke 18:1]

Reindeer Games?

 

Reindeer Games?

This is the time of year when sports abound on the television. Not everyone agrees with the programming. This is from December 23, 2011.
My parents were very traditional when it came to the holidays, especially Christmas and especially my mother.We had a number of rituals which centered around the family that we observed faithfully, a term not used in a religious connotation but one of habitual re-enactment. Mom would have left the Christmas tree up year round and she played Christmas music in July, which I found annoying as a kid but now recall fondly. We always spent Christmas in one of three places: Michigan, with Dad's family: Arkansas with Mom's kin; Nebraska by ourselves and perhaps some relatives who came to visit. It was a simpler time without as many distractions as our culture endures today and not as many outside forces competing for our attention. This morning, I read an article linked here written by Jen Floyd Engel on MSN/FOX called Do We Really Need Sports On Christmas?  (Please copy and paste the link below into your address bar.)
https://www.foxsports.com/stories/nba/do-we-really-need-sports-on-christmas

Ms Engel takes professional sports to task for scheduling games on December 25. My mom, no doubt, would have agreed with her. If you get a chance to read her short piece, I would love to hear your reaction, either on blogger comments or my FACEBOOK page. Which ever view you subscribe to, Merry Christmas!

Applicable quote of the day:

"Christmas… that magic blanket that wraps itself about us, that something so intangible that it is like a fragrance. It may weave a spell of nostalgia. Christmas may be a day of feasting, or of prayer, but always it will be a day of remembrance -- a day in which we think of everything we have ever loved."
Augusta E. Rundel

God bless,
Steve
Luke 18:1