On a whim. I think I'll head up to my 2nd home this pre Christmas weekend after all. It's been sometime since I went to some place familiar.

HRC will be opened (most likely) by then. I'll wanna try Nadje Cafe. And that English place by the riverside. Wanna slack off at Geographer Cafe again after a good hearty meal at the street side. Especially my tako-su from Fong sushi. And probably catch a movie at the cinemas and have a beer at Overtime. Not forgetting my shopping in Mahkota Parade. And yeah. It does sounds like I know the place very well eh? =P

Perhaps I will head off to try that tower and probably a climb behind the red house. And see if I can attend a church service in the meantime!

Damn. The hotel's fully booked! Need to search again. =/

Alamak! The first draft I typed went missing!!

Ok. So juz wanted to share the quote that made Rohaya and me laugh out loud juz now. =P

And today was a happy night!

1) *v msged me via fb asking opinion on a trip. =D
2) *p asked me out for dinner (but I was working till 11pm) so not possible.
3) Raymond watsapp me something about John that made me laugh out loud also. *grinz*
4) *v watsapp me and told me he passed something to a friend to pass to me. *i think I know what it is* =D
5) *m and I were watsapping and talking about food and dinner. =P

... ...

On another note.

An suddenly missing the Philippines so damn much. So much so that I so wanna go back. Even 2d1n is fine. =/

Never mind. Looking forward to all my big trips planned next year. No more small small trips! =D

And this really made me happy. A Christmas card from my kid. Gonna send one over in the next few days! *heartz*

a preview of my krabi trip.. as what *v said. i really love my beaches.. sun sea sand.. =P 

now stupid blogger said i've exceeded my upload space. so i'm posting pic from phone and typing from laptop. =P

i've also come to a conclusion about *her and have asked beloved's help. ah well. think i can manage from here ba! no more heartbreak i hope! =)

time for bed and back to work tmr! =)

Interesting getting lost day. Anyways am in bed now. Tmr will be even more tiring coz I gonna go beach hopping!!

Even *v knows I love my beaches. =P

Another solo trip. But backpacking this time! Super love backpacking I guess. It tests my organization skills! Hahaha.. =P

After much thought I decided not to bring my laptop along coz I really wanna relax and enjoy. And yeah. 1 bag and I'm leaving on a jetplane! =D

Sunny skies. Endless reflections. A time for me. =)

Long day has finally ended.

Opening and having passion run at JCP. West zone cafe challenge. Dinner with Shida Mickey Raymond and Kamariah. Supper at *m's place with tequila. =P

Later flying off!! XD

我应该彻底放手.

Yixiu. Make up your mind and let go totally ba. You'be been stuck in this rut for a long while now.

Every little thing in my everyday life I can relate back to you. Especially after a drink or two. And I always feel this strange urge to text you the way I used to. But I know the replies that will be (but higher chances of no replies). So I held back.

And time really flies. After today's shift. After the challenge. Tmr I'm flying off for my trip. Like what *x said. It's like taking cab for me when I fly. =P

Stupid dates not out. How to do schedule and enjoy my r&r?

The one msg I was waiting for didn't come in. But rather this did. And this fellow msg me at 3.41am to wish me luck. And then msged me again juz now. *heartz*

First. I think I wore a bit too daring tonight. Hmmmz. So not my style. But good change no?

*heartz*

Early morning msg from someone. =) am glad that at least someone remembered. =)

*nervous*

Super nervous now. Think it's been years since I last threw myself into this kinda situation. Travels excluded ok. Can't even remember when was the last time I felt like this! Oh! And exclude the times when I was going out with people whom I had a crush on during that period.

Seriously. This is so not me! =/

Graduated from BLP on Wednesday and learnt more new things. Now juz on the bed. And worrying about tmr.

Damn.

Have done some homework. But not sure how it'll go. But mindset is to take it like a learning journey and gain some experience. Whether I get developed or not is another story. But I'm sure some encouragement from someone would help. =P

Yeah. Strong competition but I'll juz give it my best shot.

Jiayou jiayou jiayou!!

Went out with *d and sister juz now and in the afternoon. And so apparently. Sister asked me if I'm feeling better and who I let out to. I pointed to *d and laughed. And *d said 'Yarz. She hugged me and cried..' We both laughed. =P

The same conversation came up when sister went to take more food during dinner.

*d told me he was actually quite surprised when I hugged him that day and cried. I replied him that so was I. Seriously. I never expected anyone to give me that hug that I needed. Neither did I expect him to appear.

Then he told me actually he was waiting for me that day but couldn't see me around. Only was that when he spotted me at the bus stop. And at that point I remembered that he was like a beacon in in the dark. Not sure what prompted me go over and hug him like that. Probably also coz we both knew nothing will happen. =)

... ...

Saw *m juz now. Even though it was juz a short short while. I'm happy. =)

Dead to the world yesterday. Hahaha. Slept for almost 11 hours straight. Think shopping knocks me out easily.. =P

But but but! I saw a couple of things I wanna get for myself for Christmas! Damn.. All so nice! Especially that bag I saw.. =(

I guess the distance of a country is too great for any relationship to start or continue.

Even within the same country. There's already problems keeping a single relationship sane.

I've always been very independent. Until I met someone who took my heart away and blew me off my feet.

Since then I've never been quite the same. I've been in a few relationships thereafter. But none was as 轰轰烈烈 as that one. And the best part was that wasn't even a relationship to begin with.

It's 2 years since I had someone there for me. And this year was interesting. *j was there for me. Till a point that I'm not too sure what triggered me to become juz 熟悉的陌生人 with her. It hurts no doubt but after a while I moved on. I think coz I was sick of the routine we had. I detest routine. It cramps my style.

And then I had the most shocking msg from beloved about *her. That. That really caught me off guard. But now. I'm really glad I didn't wanna listen to her bullshit. Coz what hurt and pain that has been done has been done. 6 years later for that explanation. Isn't it too late?

I wish for *you back in my life. Or rather. I wish for *you to be part of life again.

... ...

Looking forward to later. If all else goes well. I'll be meeting mdm soh. Mum. Sister. *d. For dinner after TTT. I need ears. And I probably need that shoulder to cry on this time. Damn.

A good off day. Switched off myself after starting the movie. Now chillin' by boat quay before heading home.

Live band. Potato wedges. Beer. Alone with my thoughts. Oh! And a super friendly host who made my night totally! =D

What else can a girl ask for? =)

我哭不是我舍不得你. 我哭是因为我不相信你的接班人.

My tears were of joy at your promotion boss. Not coz I was upset you were leaving. Yes. No doubt I was and still am. But hey! Isn't promotion a good thing? You'll most definitely be missed. Especially all the nagging and close follow up. I've learnt a lot these 3 months that's in this PMO. No doubt the first couple of months took some serious adapting to and I had times that I wanted to give up. But you were there every step on the way. And I know you're engineering me to my dream of that OS.

The reason we cried (Kak. Sam. Me.) was not coz we were upset to lose you as a boss. But coz we are losing that strong pillar of support that we had all these while. Comparing him and you. It's a world of difference. Not juz in working style but also in terms of his skills and knowledge as well as attitude. Imagine me still new at this high profile store. Imagine Kak taking over a store that is having so much problems. Imagine Sam running that kinda volume where she has no idea on any of the assets she is doing. We need that support. And now we're gonna miss that.

But Raymond and I promise ourselves that we will continue to nag and take charge coz this is our own development and stores. And with my Neighbour out of the PMO. The PMO is left to Raymond and me. Raymond coz he's the most senior. Me coz of my other dream.

In order not to work with someone I don't really support. The only way is up. And so I'll be working hard on that and my own target to myself is by December 2013.

Gimme a year. I promise I will deliver.

That unexpected hug. *heartz*

*d. Thank you. Thank you for that sentence of concern when it matters the most to me. Thank you for that hug when I felt that the world was crushing down on me. Thank you for listening to me. Thank you.

I know I shouldn't be feeling this upset. But I do. I'm not sure why was my reaction so negative as well but I am.

... ...

I've juz broken the news to him. And as usual. I'm leaving the team to say goodbye in their own way. Huddling in the dark in the grass patch.

In 4 months' I've given up 2 good managers. It's a pride. But also heartache.

First time in months that I come home from work and the sky is still such a pretty blue! *heartz*

One reason why I love going for classes. Coz I get to go home on time and spend the rest of the time with my family! =)

Should have let go. =/

*another early morning shift* 3 more days to go!!!

我应该有那么笨吧?

I always fear that I'll end up like those Taiwanese movie leads. Loved by someone but coz of work I had to reject their love and hurt myself in the process. =/ *random thoughtz after watching SOP queen*

*m. Thanks much for the concern. And it's been so fun to work these few days juz coz he was around. Hahaha. And les came down to visit too. =)

It feels good when you're not feeling well and someone you care more for shows concern. *totally voice-less but heartz*

我的心情是建立在你我之间的沟通!

You have NO idea.

Read something in the morning that got me thinking hard. Cannot post here coz I'm using my phone. When I post from here it's jumbled up. Will post from my laptop another time.

Today *m juz told me he had a high school friend who was shot dead in the line of fire. And he was only 35.

Really. How more shorter is life gonna get?

I love having intelligent conversation with people I love. =)

And then was having this dream:
Sundays off. Breakfast in bed.
Mondays to Saturdays after work. To watch TV while reading papers together before bed.

That would be a life I'll be looking forward to.

Juz that knowing me. I won't be able to not work shift work. And that most likely whoever my other half may be in the future. Would most likely not be able to cook. Nor read papers. Not be doing office work.

So poof! There goes my dream. =)

... ...

Congrats to those friends getting married (like machiam all in November and December lo). Like Sam. Jasmine... =)

... ...

And I love the holiday season! Coz I've got dates already! 1 date to meet my 'family'. 1 date to meet my kakis and mum. 1 date for my hgw girls. 1 date for beloved and mummy. 1 date to travel for the last time this year. Full house!

And I wanna go see the Christmas lights at Orchard! Will *you be free? =/

RIP Sir Jerry. You'll be deeply missed by all.

... ...

Life's juz so so short. You may look young and healthy on the outside. But one day you may juz collapse and never wake up. =/

Day is ending le! =P

And no regrets now. Coz I know what fragrance it is!!! *beamz*

And I got a complimentary letter today! *grinz*

How do you describe a feeling that means 'shagged beyond words'?

Saturday was 20 hours at work. Woke up and met beloved and mummy at 11am for brunch on Sunday and reached home at 9pm? Started doing my PP till 3am. Yest was at the office from 11am to 11pm for PP. Today need to work at 8am. Told them I'll reach at 9am.

And best part? My nose's not cooperating. Drowsy medication I have from Philippines. Ahhhh...

Yest out with beloved and mummy and over hearty brunch we had our usual random talks when I suddenly pop and said my dream was to get married and not work on Sundays and that the other half would cook breakfast for me in bed every Sunday. Hahaha. Don't know where that came from but we all started laughing.. =P

And while shopping I said I like guys who are able to carry off proper shoes. Hahaha. Random-ness!

Fuck!

Juz as I was about to print my reports. I had to shift my laptop and it got disconnected from the power. *Roaaaaaarz!!!* and I did not save the DT sales targets!!! WTF. Seriously!!

A year ago I ran my first marathon. Today I'm waking up now after 20 hours at work yest coz I'm meeting beloved and mummy! =P

2 years ago I was attached to *someone. Today I'm happy that I'm single and doing the things I love! =P

3 years ago I was attached to *b and discussing settling down. Today I'm busy travelling the world and widening my horizons! =P

Gooooooood morning world! What a way to start the day! =D

Was trying to figure out how to post series of photos on my phone using the app when suddenly this picture came out.

Honestly speaking? It caught me off guard totally and I cursed out loud. Ha!

totally no mood to do my PP. i need to submit on monday. tmr need to do. but saturday work full 15 hours. sunday meeting beloved and mummy. super screwed. 

i need motivation. but nothing seems to be working. probably need to wake up earlier tmr to do and see if i can drop by the pool. before going store to meet steven that is. my new baby's coming tmr! =) 

arrghz. so wanna kill myself! 

last post of my travel log.. =) 

4th hotel in 7 days! =P this is at puerto princesa. and this is a more 'normal' kind of hotel. if you get what i mean. =) lovely pool that will see us spending hours in it! XD

cool place for breakfast! by the pool!

and of course. it was back to island hopping (again.. that explains why my tan line still hasn't fade ah.. =P)

on one of the islands that i couldn't recall the name! on a floating shack! XD

according to the guide. at high tide you will not see the stretch of beach behind me. only during low tide will you see. =)

and my first memorable encounter with a real life starfish!! *beamz* i don't count the one i used to touch at underwater world hor. coz i don't remember how they feel like! XD

and a series of photos that i thought was funny.. XP

and a lovely bbq lunch on the beach again! with bananas! XD

tatA beach!

another beach! XD

*heartz*

hahaha. more friends? =P but nahz. alien and i stuck to the non alcoholic! XP

and then it started to pour! =( thank god we were done!

back in the hotel's pool whiling the time away before our next activity. and we had like 4 hours to kill? =P

see! rude alien! XD

the BEST red horse ever! forzen!! *heartz heartz*

see the 3 colours of me! ahhh... black. white. red.. *oops*

it was still raining la..

and all the nua-ing in the pool made us hungry for food!! XD

and it was dinner at baker's hill! XD

ta-da! firefly watching! definitely christmas has come early! XD

breakfast the next morning!

randomly. dew drops.. *heartz*

scenery along the rocky 2 hour mini-van ride. (where an ang moh got down and puked while his filipino 'girlfriend' continued playing with her phone. lll-.-)

can you guess where we're headed? XP

the evasive ice cream truck! this time i got my yam and mango! XD (there was cheese but nahz...)

love how the waves crash onto the rocks.. =)

reached! =D

machiam like consturction worker/bob the builder lo.. lll-.-

i like this tree. coz sitting on it but i can still swing slightly! XD

*v's 'favourite'. tamilow.. NEVER WILL I TRY. period.

another banana after lunch! XP

love the turnout of this photo. if not for the human behind! =(

another ice cream from the same man! juz mango this time coz no more yam. ="(

local delights.. =P

actually i really didn't buy much. juz travel packs of tolietries and magazines and postcardssssssss.. XP

see! bought pear to share. they leave my pear on the floor! hrmphz.

lovely lovely beers.. my collection.. =P

my last photo with my 2nd fav beer in the world! *missez*

and that sums up my 8 days trip to my 3rd home. will be back next year! =P in the meantime.. looking forward to my solo trip this month! *heartz*