Quarrel

There's no point shouting over spilt milk. No point yelling over things not done. What you'll only earn is disrespect. Everyone needs a different approach to things coz that's what made us different! Yes. It's tough to adapt to so many different people and age groups but once you're able to do it. It means you are truly a great leader.

A great leader teaches the new. Coaches the unfamiliar. Develops the potential. Guides the lost. And leads by example.

If you think it's tough juz being a leader in your own right. Why doesn't anybody spare a thought for me? I have so many different groups of people to look after and listen to. So does that mean I have the right to blow my top juz coz you don't understand my point? If you think you are right. So be it. I give up already. Why should I put in so much effort and passion into a place that you being the leader doesn't even see the point?

If scolding gets work done. Gets you somewhere. Go ahead. Crew and beanies will juz turnover. You think it's easy to hire? It freaking not. It's easy to train? Hell no!

So wake up your ideas! Things don't get done through fear or anger. Instead it's the firmness and understanding that gets things moving.

Think about it.

... ...

On a side note. I managed to talk to *d a while juz now. He's having his own problems too. Hmmmz. I wish I could help. But I can't. Only advise. =/

interesting how a day can turn out.

what started out as a smooth day with learnings in between. a run along the canal. some exercises at the fitness corner. a walk through the new flats and a climb down the 16 flight of stairs. (next target: to run up 16 stories of stairs.) and went for dinner with my mummy at fajar and then back home to reply emails and do some work. it all got interrupted by a flurry of sms from my new tfm and asst. juz coz of something which i think it's insignificant and a consequence from someone else.

what is read off my blog will stay within these invisible walls of my blog. no sharing with others please.

probably i guess my 1st asst has much to work on. especially shift management. coz i've been hearing quite a number of feedbacks from all managers as to how she hands over shifts. how she runs shifts. and i seem to think that if 1 manager tells me that. it's probably not believable. but when like my whole team tells me that. something muz be quite wrong somewhere. i'm not sure what though. needs to take some observations ba. or probably coz the rest of the team knows what i want and my expectations already and she's juz new to the store ba.

and then there's the division between the 2 assts in my store. they like so afraid to talk to each other. sighz. what's the world coming to man.

... ...

anyways. went out with *y yest night to wcp. very impromptu coz he was feeling down and out with work and his family problems.

and so we juz sat there and chatted and reminisce about the past. =)

... ...

sometimes i wish life was simpler. and probably like back in the past when there was someone there for me at the end of each day. probably the stupid me still think back of the happier times i spent with *someone and *y.

ah well. =) time to continue moving on!

let's see... this month is ending. july is coming. and people have dated me and i've dated people. and i am so gonna enjoy enjoy enjoy!!! =D

3: great eastern 10km with mei chun. adora. siew kee. ginger. and god-knows-who. =)

16: sister's new look celebration! =D

17: italian food with drinking session after that with george. ah pang. shark. alien! =D

and another 4 days to go phuket with mum! hee! =D

i am sooo gonna look forward to the end of this month and start of next!

but first! to teach all my managers to behave! =D good nightz world! need to wake up early for breakfast tmr before my meeting. tatA! =D

hahaha. don't know why but i super heart this photo. probably coz all along i wanted a tattoo and this is the closest i can get to it ba. =P

anyways. been out celebrating shark's birthday over the weekends with ifly's GO. pmal GO. good food. good food. and good food. =D happy birthday again shark! =D

... ...

and i wonder why am i who i am today? who was the one who shaped to be me now? i missed an event over the weekend and then i found someone who went and we started talking about it.

it was initially tiring when you can't say things out. when all your feelings had to be hidden and bottled up like ships in the bottles. but after a while when you got used to it. when you think that you've moved on. when you think that you've changed. it juz take a little thought to change the whole outlook to life.

that what if you've never moved on. what if those you used to think you'd liked were actually not really there?

it's true how sensitive i am to others. and of things i guessed but refuse to say. and of how i may have lied to myself all these times. hmmmz.

and shark! i really don't like your smell today! made me think of *someone whole day long! hrmphz. =X

it's interesting how that 'bedtime' story we made up have stuck with me all through these years. consciously or subconsciously. that's still the reason why i wanna go new york. maybe juz maybe. under the christmas tree at rockfeller centre we may really meet...

Pink dot

Perhaps somehow somewhere I am still that girl I was 10 years back. *d. Thanks for letting me realize that. True that no matter what happens it'll never be a 180 degree change and sitting on the fence is as far as I can go.

Perhaps all along I haven't forgot about *her yet?

I hope this new found friendship with *d stays on for life. =)

was going to post up the pics of my escapades for the last few weeks. but i think juz uploading on fb is killing me le. hahaha. coz i was sending emails and reading emails at the same time. hahaha. while playing RC. oops! =P

anyways the past weeks have been good. probably coz store's settling down well. so i feel less stress le. more stability means more chances of going overseas! =D hahaha.

and for those of you who are getting worried and thinking something is seriously wrong with me coz how can i be this happy after that particular post on fb? i can be. coz i am. =) fortunately i should say that by saying everything out it's easier to put down. rather than not knowing anything. so yeah. i really am fine. i haven't been able to breathe so easy since don't know when. and probably that's why i'm more crazy when i'm out with my friends. =D

crazy karin and i went BSP that day. hahaha. it was more like a hike there lo! was telling adora juz now. =P and people were there to exercise while we were there to eat mac. hahaha. and rotted away and raking our brains for people and where they are now. =)

went out with alien. shark. chili and angel too for minds cafe. and a lot of rounds of food. was a good good day. =D

today had bonding session too. finally a time when i feel that we are less pmo-ish and more zone-ish. =)

gonna gear up for a few more events. meeting shark and alien this sat with mum most likely coz of IFLY's GO. and good food!!! and then sun for PMAL's GO which i am the overall i/c. hmmmz. i hope i do ok! =) after all the support the zone has given me during my store's opening. this's the least i can do in return. and more mdp sessions with my mgrs. and then there's the 10km run. i told adora we can walk together that day le. hahaha. coz she is not a runner either. only a cyclist or swimmer. hahaha. =P

yepz yepz. sleepy le. coz slept late yest after all the crazy fun. and woke up early today to meet don for breakfast. =D and don and i were like nodding off during R2D2 lo. hahaha. oops!

okok. gonna sleep in a while!

我应该真的放弃了。傻了那么久，笨也笨了那么久。

奇怪的是，他既然那么说了，我却没感觉。当然一开始有一种莫名的悲痛，但哭了一阵，睡了一觉，那些感觉也跟着消失了。可能不知不觉中我已经把他的好给遗忘了。都过了那么久，我想念他的好，但也把那些好抛到脑后了。

girl 所说的，狠一点，长痛不如短痛，就彻底把那些回忆全洗掉。

girl. thanks for yest night. you made me prove to my self things that i never thought possible. and surprisingly the route i took back every night that got me thinking? today there was juz a void there. no more feelings for anyone. no more waiting. juz a relieved that once said out. everything seems better and easier to move on.

*y. 谢谢你一直默默地陪在我身边，谢谢你昨晚的那一通电话，谢谢你让我有了那么多美好的回忆。谢谢你不计较我的错，我的过失，我的一切。每当我快垮的时候，谢谢你一直守护着我，听我唠叨，看着我哭。

i know that all along you know where my heart and soul really was. thank you for not forcing me to make any decisions and letting me go juz like that. thank you for being there 24/7 for me. thank you for staying as my friend all this time.

但我真的累了，我不想再谈恋爱，不想再受伤。

everytime there will be someone who promised not to hurt you. to take care of you. to wanna protect you from harm. it's all bullshit. after so many who promised to. *y is the only one who really kept to it. the rest? never. some time or another. they break that promise and pretend nothing of that sort happens.

but i guess what someone told me once. 'the bell curve can only get better.' mine will never be a bell curve anymore. but a curve that keeps on going up. =)

Heartbreak

Girl. Thanks for being there! Much much appreciated! Especially when we're gonna meet under the orange lollipop tree in a while! =D yes I will be good and go sleep now. I need my energy to focus on more worthy things! =D

*her. Now I know why you chose that route back then. Coz now given the choice. I will too. It takes time but it's do-able! =) slowly. A step at a time. It's been 5 years since our last contact. 3 years since I last shed a tear over you. =)

Girl. I'm coming to bed le! Don't hustle me! =D muackz!

=edited=

Oooh yeah. Was juz talking to girl and how I hope I can finish the 10 km great eastern run in under 1.5 hours! Or better still! Can I swim throughout the 10 km? Sure can finish faster de. =P ah well. Good luck to me! Time to continue my training tmr! =D

birthday

a simple birth date. but many to thank. =)

steven. terry. *b. mum. mummy monster. kaijing. mummy. angel. twinie. wan. sherill. margarate. shasha. mei. levi. rina. min. ailing. ailing's daughter. kelly. adilla. *y. nan jong. *someone. yumi. weitian. daphne. xiao qiang. amelia. harvy. mei chun. ginger. eva. raymond. nafisah. michael. partner. teck whye kor kor. jessica. leigh. gab. tom. yaya. chee wei. girl. niyuki. ah pang. jiahui. chili. huising. annie. weixiong. fadhil. jack. wen how. ling ling. chandra. alien. shark. chantel. richard. kelly. dave. eve. michelle. yani. nick. michael. jem. daddy. stella. dusty. azela. ray. kok seng. dom. audrey. philip. jinyu. yette. yong choo. don. mummy. jay. jac jac. liana. henry. uncle. bonus. raja. kelvin kor kor. halif. guan hong. pill. karin. amy. kate. sze hua. grace. cooking partner. beloved. dzul. shifu. marc. fagan. peachie. cl. mentor. ben. mei fang. sakira. chris. anna. mas. emma. florence. din. aziz. nura. mira. sinyee. poh chuan. dawn. kaiting. ning ning. yanti. kaihui. shima. jessie. lover. dina. lover. siew fong. karen. michelle. clara. dan. dewi. xianda. les. fiona. nick. anna's daughter. jeff. dinesh. nel. lay lee. angela. joshua. marwarni. lianna. jack. shiming. michelle. peifen. jovi. fely. jiamin. ann. qi. hui shan. mikkiko. mei fang's bf. musa. chew chi. fadyla. yani. henrik. jas. jenna. da ge. reaus. wilson. din. yvonne. john. avril. bf. ken. boon. loreann. ken. cheese. narvy. rin. siew choo. khairul. adora. bernard. joy. doods. candy. algin. lao da. felicia. wing. rio. ailing. sarah. michelle. stew. allan. arynna. jie. mirza. ugun. supriy. shujun. aqing. line. jessie. imran. rolly. couzin. gino.

thanks for all the wishes again! =D

a new month. a new beginning.

have finally planned a solo trip out of town. payment made. now waiting for the date to come. =) 1 more trip paid for next month. bought a massage package for this month. and gonna try 2 more food places with the fellows this month too. was gonna try another 2. but ah well. =X am gonna meet couzin again! and he was the one who texted me first. =D and gonna meet the fellows separately for meals too! wanna watch movies also! waiting for my friend to tell me the review. and bro is back! =D bought a book i was waiting for. settled my monthend action plans and stuff quite fast. now left pnl and accountability. =D gonna meet some fellows for board games and more crap soon! =D and then there's the 2 GOs i'm looking forward to. and a ton of movies and dramas waiting for me to watch at home too! =D and coz it's the first time after so many years that i am off on my birthday! =D hee hee hee! =D

things are definitely looking up this month! =D

my wishes this year? hmmmz. to make that $1 SOI for may and that it will be a continuous trend (upwards that is!) to continue to be able to meet my fellows and friends for food and laughter. =D for money to drop from the sky so i can save for south africa. =D and to meet *w one last time perhaps? (although this is the toughest. ah well.)

alrighty. time to head off to bed for a while before meeting alien for dinner later. tatA! =D