Friday, November 28, 2008

Friday Night Fights: KAPOW!! - Round 3: THUNDERFROG!



The primary rule of Friday Night Fights: KAPOW!! is that every entry must contain an onomatopoeia associated with the final blow.


Round 3 is dedicated to honoring two gentlemen who deserve a lifetime achievement award in this category. Together they are the uncontested masters at combining onomotopoeia and pulse-pounding action. They are:

Walt Simonson and John Workman.

Round 3 focuses on one of their crowning achievements. From the pages of Mighty Thor#366, I give you:

THUNDERFROG!!!


Synopsis: Thor receives a kiss from a mysterious lady bystander. Unfortunately, said lady bystander is under an enchantment of Thor's evil half-brother Loki. So as soon as she plants a wet one on our favorite God of Thunder, he transforms into an ordinary frog. Fortunately, he eventually locates his hammer, which changes him into:




THE FROG OF THUNDER!



Which means it's '"Hammer Time" for Loki:




Spacebooger says: "You feelin' froggy? Leap!!"

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Giving Thanks






I'm making this post quick because I'll be off with my lady for some Thanksgiving celebrations.

I'm thankful for the family and friends I've been blessed with. I'm thankful for having a wonderful woman in my life. And right now, I'm thankful for the miracle of YouTube for letting me share the following Thanksgiving highlights:


The staff of WKRP learn an interesting factoid about turkeys here.


One of the greatest cartoon battles of all time: Snoopy vs. Lawnchair!


Here is a special thanks from fellow Illinois native Dennis DeYoung.


And from the Kaiser Chiefs.




You know what else I'm thankful for? That this lady and her running mate did not win the general election.


Happy Thanksgiving, everybody!

Friday, November 21, 2008

Friday Night Fights: KAPOW!!! - Round Two: Enter The Bat!!


Round One of Friday Night Fights: KAPOW!! showcased Richard "Robin" Grayson's mastery of onomatopoetic combat.


Round Two features the man who taught young Richard everything he knows on the subject.




And here's one of his signature moves.....


....The patented Aparo Backhand.



This round brought to you courtesy of The Untold Legend of the Batman #2 and Spacebooger.

Friday, November 14, 2008

Friday Night Fights:KAPOW!!! - Round One : Holy Last-Minute Substitutions!


For Round One of the new Friday Night Fights, I originally intended to present Oliver Queen beating the crap out of Hal Jordan. But when I read the pre-fight rules for Friday Night Fights:KAPOW!!, which state that every entry must contain an onomatopoeia associated with the final blow, I had to disqualify my original entry. So, instead, I give you:


Dick Grayson beating the crap out of Hal Jordan!!



There! Much better!

Sunday, November 09, 2008

Proposition Hate


"Quick to judge, quick to anger, slow to understand.
Ignorance and prejudice and fear walk hand in hand."
- Neal Peart


In the aftermath of the election I expressed pride that our nation had significantly evolved with Barack Obama's presidential victory. However, some results of the same election suggests that we're not as far along as we thought.

The most egregious example of this is the passing of Proposition 8 in California. For those of you unaware of this proposition, Prop 8 officially amends the state Constitution to limit marriage to unions between a man and a woman. This effectively bars homosexuals and lesbians from getting married in California.

Even the ballot title signals just how wrong this proposition is: ""Eliminates Right of Same-Sex Couples to Marry." Any constitutional amendment that includes "eliminates right of" in its title raises a red flag that any American should beware of. The problem is, too many people put blinders on when it involves denying or taking away rights of people other than themselves. Especially when those "others" belong to a group that they hate and/or fear.

The primary rationale given for the "necessity" of Prop 8 is that gay marriage poses a threat to traditional (code for "straight") marriage. Well, I've lived long enough to know than whatever wounds dealt to the institution of heterosexual marriage have been self-inflicted. High divorce rates, infidelity, greed, domestic abuse. None of these were caused by gay people wanting to get married.

How galling is it to homosexuals to read over and over again examples like Britney Spears' quickie marriage to Jason Alexander (not the one from "Seinfeld") or an intoxicated and barely coherent Dennis Rodman marrying Carmen Electra, both "traditional marriages" being entered into and dissolved with little thought? Or what about the reality show "Who Wants To Marry A Multi-Millionaire?" with Rick Rockwell and Darva Conyer? On top of that gay people have to hear how they can't be allowed to marry because it would threaten sanctity of marriage. The hypocrisy is staggering!

Don't get me wrong. For all the cases where we heteros get it wrong in marriage, there are vast amounts of times where we get it right. Gays and lesbians deserve this same opportunity to succeed or fail.

At one time when I was younger, I might have suggested what many in the middle offer as a solution now. "Just give it a different name than 'marriage' ", they say. Like "civil union", for example. But that represents an example of the "separate but equal" doctrine, and we know how poor a solution that has proven in the past.

The most distressing aspect is that this amendment not only denies gay people marriage rights, but takes away rights that had already been granted over 6 months ago. That's right, defeat of Prop 8 would not have led to a radical revision of California's educational system. Defeat of Prop 8 would have simply meant upholding the status quo. NOTHING WOULD HAVE CHANGED. Proponents of Prop 8 falsely claimed that
gay marriage rights would have opened the door for gay rights groups to impose a "homosexual agenda" on Californians' children and schools. But they've had gay marriage rights for 6+ months and nothing changed. What the hell were they waiting for?

Anti-gay groups constantly accuse the gay community of wanting to impose an agenda on everyone, but from where I sit, THEY are the ones who are constantly seeking to impose THEIR agenda. It's a classic case of projection.

Fans of this site may have pieced together that I'm a heterosexual man living in Illinois. So it would appear that I don't have much of a dog in this fight. So why should this proposition upset me so much?

Two reasons.

The first is that Prop 8 is a slap in the face of the very principles of equal rights and human decency that our country is supposed to stand for. Why does hatred and fear of gays seem to override those principles for so many people?

The second is a bit more personal. You see, I'm in love with a woman I've been dating for over 2 years. Although I am a few months shy of making it official, she's the woman with whom I wish to spend the rest of my life. It's quite possible I could be married by the end of next year. And, let me tell you, I would be fighting mad if a group of self-righteous zealots with too much free time took away our right to get married. But that is precisely what has just happened to gay people attempting to get married in California. The only thing that separates them and me in this regard is sexual preference. So you can understand if I empathize with their plight and get angry at those who would stand in their way.


Everyone should. It's the least we can do. We're supposed to be human beings, dammit.

By the way, what Melissa did was awesome.

Saturday, November 08, 2008

FNF - The Next Generation

You can't keep a good fight down!


Tuesday, November 04, 2008

Turn and Face the Strange Changes




I actually saw my country evolve tonight. It's a beautiful thing.

Sunday, November 02, 2008

The definition of " Insanity" is (Election 2008 Version)


Repeating the same action....







...over and over again...







...and expecting....





...a different result.

Obama/Biden '08!

I'm Notintheface and I approve this message.

Roger Ebert and the REAL way to fix "Heroes"

Recently, I've seen several lists from critics and assorted bloggers on how to "fix" the TV show "Heroes". The lists have usually been either 5 or 7 or 10 items, and they usually include such suggestions as "lose the time travel plots" or "pare down the number of characters".


As a fan who still enjoys the show but sees room for improvement, I have only one suggestion, and it's inspired by Chicago Sun Times critic Roger Ebert:


Stop relying so much on the "Idiot Plot".


For those unfamiliar with the term, the "Idiot Plot" is defined by Ebert as a plot which only functions because every main character is a complete idiot. If even one key character in this scenario would act logically, the story would be over immediately. Granted, these storylines can crop up from time time in your typical drama, but Season 3 of "Heroes" has been riddled with them.


Here are some examples (SPOILERS AHEAD):


Hiro: " I'm going to open this super-secure safe containing the part of the secret superpower formula, despite listening to a tape of my late father just 10 seconds ago specifically telling me not to open the safe. What could possibly go wrong?" (Answer: Super-speedster Daphne steals the aforementioned formula 10 seconds later.)


Mohinder: "I'm going to inject myself with my first untested superpower formula. What's the worst that could happen?" (Answer: He gains superpowers but also falls victim to physical mutations and erratic behavior.)


Future Peter: " I just tried to change the future by shooting my own brother Nathan in the chest. It only made things worse. Better that I keep trying than, say, going back in time to stop myself from shooting Nathan in the first place."


Present Peter (in villain Jesse's body) : " How did Knox figure out that I wasn't really Jesse? Could it have been because I kept yelling "I'M PETER PETRELLI!!!" at the top of my lungs while we were in the Level 5 cells?" (Answer: Ya think?)


Claire: " These escaped level 5 villains are really dangerous. I think I'll go after them using only my healing ability and a taser."


Present Peter again: "My dad took all my superpowers, handcuffed me to this gurney and locked me in this big empty room. I've escaped from my handcuffs, and am waiting to ambush my dad and the guards. I think I'll stand all the way at the end of the room, just to give myself a running start." (You can predict how this turned out.)


Even Peter's more sensible brother Nathan seems to have succumbed this week: "Peter just told me how our dad is alive and how he stole all of Peter's powers and left him with multiple injuries. So I think I'll go confront him armed with only my ability to fly. Yeah, I can take him."


I was almost going to include the main villain and aforementioned power-stealing dad, Arthur Petrelli, in the list above for killing Maury Parkman without leeching Maury's telepathic abilities, but then I remembered that all of Maury's telepathic gifts also are possessed by his son Matt, and subsequently absorbed by Peter. So Arthur didn't steal Maury's telepathy because he already had it himself.


Plus, he's a villain. Most of the other heroes have been acting like fools at some point in this third season, with one notable exception: HRG.


So please, Heroes writers. Have your heroes act at least a little smarter. And have them listen to HRG.