21...a number many below that would yearn for...A number for freedom, a number for independence and a number that also tells you, whatever you sign or oblige to, U take full responsibility..

I spent my 21 sitting on a water buffalo thinking of things like this..The past few birthdays were an encouragement that its one more year to FREEDOM!but when i finally reach it..Reality unveils itself like a lecturer who kindly informs the students that this final exam will decide their future..well the feeling of wishing this had not happened and all the ways like finding ways to get a fever lingers in your mind...that was what happened on my 21,as much as i knew exams are here, i have to work hard on my own..

Its been a long time again that i have been updating this blog..well, i have been through many things since then...Exams, outings overseas, and again a deeper understanding in psychology, counseling and love relations for life...by asking as many as i can on so many people of many ages, i realized how immature i am in handling, managing and developing a relationship...through many advices and experiences of those who have went through that path, all have this common theory which i took back...

Many use to think that Love is whoa! that feeling that makes your heart tingle when you see that person's eyes, the joy when he/she cares for you, treats you well, understands you, agrees with you and even willing to stay that extra hour to listen and comfort you...when you first hold that person's hand, an electric shock flows through veins for hours even through the night in your dreams!! i used to think and mentality...looking back after countless arguments, the meaning of love becomes questionable and you wonder again, did i love that person?Oh wait, what is love again?

Love is not a fantasy or perfection in which every need is met, but sharing a life together, striving to meet each other's needs as best we can. Forgiving our partners for the mistakes and accepting their limitations can be just as fulfilling as appreciating their many gifts and successes. just as it was difficult for her to live with a man who didn't live up to her expectations, it was challenging for Puneh to meet up with his wife's fantasy of a perfect relationship...

Just as women need to let go of expecting men to be perfect, men too need to let go of the expection that women think we are perfect...After hearing from him, i realised the years he had to take to come up with that advice...

One thing i've learnt is that True love doesen't demand Perfection but rather embraces imperfection....

She needs Him for Romantic Companionship,
She needs him to be faithful,
She needs him make the first move,
She needs him for a simple Companionship,
She doesn't want him to be elaborate and complicated,
She needs him for financial Backup,
She needs him to be around coz she wants to be safer,
She needs to have someone to share the fun times with her,
She needs him to listen, share and care about her well being,
She needs him to miss her when hes away,
She needs him when she cries,
She needs him to eventually help her raise the family if they have children,
She needs him to share the responsibilities of caring for the Nest,
She needs him to fix things when they break.

Those are what i hear from 200 respondents who told me what they need in a guy the most...I realized that women these days need men more than ever, as much as they want to be independent and controlling, they will eventually come to the fact that both will need each other!!many women need men in different ways... Men can provide any assistance that she needs in coping stress but i realized that women these days don't know how to get this support and appreciate it properly when it is available!!! Based on their need, they tend to focus on what they don't have and not appreciating what the guy is already providing...

I've learnt that its so simple...When she learns to appreciate what the man already offers, SHE holds the key to asking for more in small increments to get the supoort she needs and deserves...To me, its not all about strategies but rather this is also what Love is all about=)

A couple who have been in a marriage for 40 years once told me, after making love, he asked her what the experience was? she replied much better than the first time..Why?

Because, they have been tru 40 years of qurrelling, bad times, fun times, sad times, challenging times and all sorts...through the potrayal of flaws and incapacities, they still love each other=)

Definitely one of my Lifetime GOALS!!

THE NEW YEAR HAS COME!!!

Whow its been long since I've updated this blog...many events & occasions have happened since then and it has been straining me like Squeezing the contents out of a chicken while its still alive!!looking back, i've learnt so many things from leadership to discipleship and most importantly learning how to better communicate with God!!

Well i can dare say that through this year, He has answered a prayer that was burning in me in 2007; i hoped to see this youth ministry double its size and continue to grow in faith, true enough, He has been faithful, since ignition of about 80 youths, we have grown to about 150 in camps alone!!As of today, when i went into the chapel, i could barely find an empty seat!!I was happily standing!!!

Anyway, this year is gonna be challenging for me, its gonna be a major transition, i have to complete many of the remaining projects and finalize my thesis on psychology and love relations for Life!!....

And oh yah, Pes A!!!many have sent their condolences and best wishes...no worries, I will Survive!!time to kill some quails!!