Environment

Waking up this morning and thinking back, I've realized that I tend to have a lot more energy while I'm in Vancouver.  I can go out later, wake up earlier, want to do more things, and not be as tired.  In the Bay Area, I feel like a lazy ass as well...not in the same way my friend is a lazy ass but more in the way that I'm tired all the time, never feel well rested, don't really want to do anything (drinking doesn't count) and stay home alot. 
 
Does our environment really change our moods?  What is the term for that?  I think someone told me before.  Anyways, is being in an enviroment that you love (even if it rains all the time) a source of energy.  Is it happiness that fuels our energy levels?  I would think hating the Bay Area doesn't help my energy levels.  But then again...when I'm on Vacation, I have lots of energy too...maybe it's just the thought of having so limited amount of time to do everything you want that gives you that drive and energy.  I was starting to think it was age that makes me tired all the time...but I think it's the environment or lack there of. 
 
I've really got to think seriously about moving!

Vancouver

I was so excited...Vancouver!  I hadn't been back since xmas.  It was so great getting on the plane and waiting for it to land.  I know there is much more to do in the Bay Area but seriously, Vancouver is so nice.  So I get off the plane and head straight to Stephos, I have never seen a line at 8:30 when I've come home from SF...until tonight.  As we left at 11, there was still people coming in to dine and it was still full.  It's usually the first place I head to.  Then driving down the streets of downtown and even on Kingsway...you realize, there are so many places open and people hanging around.  Reminded me of when I first moved to the Bay Area and couldn't believe that I couldn't find a place to eat after 9pm.  It's gotten better now but not much...still nothing like Vancouver.  And to top it off, after drinking, only a handful of places are open for food in the Bay Area.  This was a Thursday and everything seemed to still be open when we were driving home at 11pm.  I don't think anywhere can beat the food in Van.  I like the Bay Area for the diversity and the opportunities but I love Vancouver for the Beautifulness and the late night activities.

House Guests

So my uncle and cousin have been visiting since Saturday.  They have been really good guests...they are clean, make me dinner, do my dishes, etc.  It's been great.  We've been playing board games and cards at night.  I actually have some company.  But I guess I miss my freedom and privacy as well.  It's really hard cause I normally work until I feel like it's time to leave.  This whole week I've been watching the clock and feeling bad if I leave any later than 6pm cause they may be expecting me at home...but then I feel bad cause I'm going to be leaving early tomorrow to go home to Vancouver.  I've also noticed that I've been tiptoeing around the apartment in the morning just so I don't wake them and the other day I forgot something at home but decided not to go back to pick it up cause it would disturb them.  I also no longer can go to the bathroom or shower with the door open.  It's great to have guests but I've come to realize that I like living alone and it would take a lot of getting used to if I was to ever have a roommate again...but then again...I think someone mentioned in Head Dump's blog that if you're single too long you'll get too used to it. 

Love

What is Love?  When asked this question, many people answer, well it's a feeling, others answer, it's an act.  Why is it that some people can find true love at a young age while others take longer or some don't ever find it?  Is it that they are too scared to take the risks involved in a relationship?  You see all those people who move across the Country while others can't give up a weekend night to be with their so-called gf?  
 
What do people consider love?  Everyone goes through emotional feelings and feelings are very judgemental.  Is love a sacrifice?  I once was told that if you love someone, you would be willing to do anything for them...that is a conscious decision to do these things.  You see all these people get divorces in the world today and is it that they do not know how to act on love?  Has our society become so self-centered that we are unable to make these sacrifices for a loved one when the feeling is no longer there?  Yes it would be perfect if we always had those lovey, dovey feelings but that's not reality.  When those feelings are gone, is it our self-centeredness that causes us to break up?  Is love not a decision you make?   
 
Reflecting on my past relationships, I wonder..if I really loved the person, wouldn't I have tried harder to work it out?  At what point do you say, you need to work things out or call it quits?  Is it marriage?  How does happiness play a role into this?  When looking at marriages, several parents say they stay together for the kid's sake.  Should their happiness really be sacrificed for the love they have for their kids?  Do people actually stop loving people or is it that they no longer want to make these sacrifices for the relationship and therefore make the decision to no longer love them?  Is our happiness not just a state of mind and it's our decision to make the best of the situation?
 
 

Lazy Ass Friend Part II

So during this time off that my friend has, he's decided to go to bartending school.  And I was surprized that he actually followed through with it since he's "All Talk".  Anyways, he's gotten pretty good at bartending school, so we hear...and one day he said he's going to make us all drinks!  Thanks ahead of time!  The funny thing is that now that he's gone to bartending school, he thinks that he can get a great job at a bar during the PEEK hours (Fri/Sat night) and at a really happening bar.  And don't get me wrong, he might be able to land one of those jobs since it's obvious that he's got really good luck, but come on.  When you hear this, do you really think a ROOKIE should be able to get a job on the busiest night of the bars?  I don't think so...I think you have to work all the crappy shifts and work your way up...that's usually how the world works.  Then he goes on to say that he wants to get a job at a gay bar.  What?  Why would you do that?  To get more tips?  Is there something he's not telling us?

Lazy Ass Friend

So I have this friend that went to Winnipeg for two weeks to visit his family.  When asked why he was going, he stated there was nothing else to do.  He's been back to Winnipeg two times this year already which is really strange cause for a time, I think he never even went back to visit his family for years.  I think he's trying to make up for lost time and the guilt for never going home for xmas since he calls Toronto his home and goes there for xmas.  Anyways, this friend of mine has come up with a theory on the American System.  He thinks the less you work the more you'll get rewarded...and it's proven well for him.  He's been at two start up companies since moving here in 1999.  The first went bankrupt while this second one just got bought out by Cisco.  In his first company, he worked his ass off for the first few years and then started to slack (Boy I wonder why they went under..LOL).  Anyways, since he's been at this second company, all he does is come into work at 11 or 12, go to lunch, then work for a few hours, goes to the gym at around 6 or 7 and then goes home.  After doing all this, he gets a decent size raise and then the Company eventually got bought out by Cisco so now he has all this time on his hands (well over a month) while the transaction takes place and he's sitting on his ass praying for it to take an extra 30 days so that he won't have to work while being paid.  On top of all that, he gets all these payouts prior to starting at Cisco and then he gets additional payouts for stay a year and then two years.  Does he really have a point on the American System or is it because of people like him that everyone else gets jacked and is required to work tonnes of hours while not getting compensated for it?  Do you really get rewarded for being a slacker?  And can you really give yourself a raise by cutting your hours?  But how long will that raise last if your boss finds out and fires you? 

This entry -- and those appearing on Geeksploitation, Head Dump, Creative Freedom, Random Task and Stuff in My Head throughout today -- is for his intoxicated amusement.

Animal Cruelty

So I'm walking down on Fisherman's Wharf yesterday and I see this girl with a hot pink leash.  I'm thinking to myself...that's really bright...then I follow the leash down to the ground to see a tiny pink maltese.  I'm watching as the maltese is scurrying to keep up with her owner while the owner is unaware of how tiny the dog is.  Do people not realize that they are much bigger than their dogs and that they take larger steps than them?  Anyways, as she's walking with her puppy, she can hear everyone saying how cute the puppy is and wondering why it's pink.  You can tell she loves this attention.  I'm walking directly behind her and realize that she's half dragging this poor puppy on it's feet as it can't keep up.  Then I see that the pup is trying to pee and can't cause she stops to go and the owner keeps draggin her without noticing.  "Excuse me, you dog is trying to pee!"  She quickly turns around and makes sure her dog goes pee and then picks her up to make sure she is ok.  I go and pet the dog and ask to hold her and find out the following information.  Yes, the dog's hair has been colored.  Yes, it is a maltese.  And it's only 3 months old.  The dog was so adorable and yes it was cute to see a pink dog walking along but isn't that so mean?  A 3 month old dog, that is pink, being dragged cause it can't keep up.  When my dog was only 3 months, I carried her everywhere...for fear that someone might step on her.  The wharf is so busy, who knows what could happen to her. 
 
And I know that me and my friends have joked about coloring my dog black so that she looked the same as when I got her but we're only joking!  I would never do that.  Sometimes, I just feel that people should get interviewed before having a pet.

Horoscopes and Fortune Tellers

Do we really live in a society that can predict our future?  Although most of us sit here and say we don't believe in horoscopes and fortune tellers, I feel that there is a part of me that would like to believe that they were true.  I've never been one to read my horoscope religiously but of course at the end of every magazine, I would read my horoscope and sit there and think if it sounded generic where it could apply to everyone or if it seemed specific enough.  Then I would sit there and wonder...is it going to be true?  I've started to read the horoscope on a more regular basis now...and although I know it's full of crap, I sometimes wish that we were able to predict our future. 
 
I've also recently wanted to go see a fortune teller.  But have been scared cause what if she tells me something bad is going to happen.  Who knows, I guess I'll just have to go and see.

Shopaholic

Last night, I was on the phone with a friend and he possed the question, "Are you a shopaholic?"  Now that's very interesting.  What constitutes a shopaholic?  So we decided to go through a series of questions, "well, do you have more than one purse?"...yes.  "Do you buy another one just cause it's something you want?...yes.  "How many pairs of shoes do you have?"...over 25.  "Do you have outfits in your closet that still have the tags on it?...yes but doesn't everyone?   
 
Seriously, just cause you buy stuff that's on sale cause you know you will eventually wear it, shouldn't make you a shopaholic.  You're just being a smart shopper so that you don't have to pay full price later on...even though sometimes you do still pay full price.  Wouldn't the above questions just be a description of a female in general and some males too?
 
Do I buy something everyday?...NO.  Do I always want to go to the mall?...NO.  Would I rather shop than eat, sleep, drink?...HELL NO. 
 
Therefore, I conclude that I'm not a shopaholic. 

Church

I was sitting in the lunch room the other day, and one of my collegues was telling me a story about her church.  She was at church over the weekend and there was this lady there that had stomach pains during the service and decided to move into a room so she can lay down.  I guess some people followed her into the room and started thinking that the pains were because she was being possessed by an evil spirit.  It sounded like it became a big thing because next thing you know, all these people are around her and she's laying there holding her stomach in pain.  These people start thinking that they need to hold her down and find a way to get the spirit out of her.  They pin her arms and legs down and while they are doing this she is getting upset and struggling to get free.  Who wouldn't?  As this is happening, some people in the room are actually in sound mind and say, "maybe we should call 911".  The elders ignore this comment and continue to fight the evil spirit.  In the end, the pastor leaves as he has lost total control and lets the people do what they want...but eventually they realize that it is just pains and that they can stop the Exorcism.  When hearing this story, I was in such shock that things like this could happen in a church.  Although I had not been to church in a long time, I'd like to think that it was a place of worship.  I know that the church is not perfect but you'd like to think that something this obviously wrong would not happen.  When the people that are leading you in the church believe this, have taken action this extremely, and the pastor leaves the crowd to do what they want, I'm sorry but I think it's time to find a new church. 

ADD

So I'm sitting here thinking...what should I blog about today.  And of course the topic that I always talk to my friends about comes to mind...ADD.  The funny thing is...I forgot that I thought of this topic and was really trying hard to think about what I was thinking about.  Talk about being Funny!  Anyways, I don't know if it's the age thing, actual ADD or something else, but my memory just doesn't seem to be like it used to.  I used to be able to remember every last detail plus more.  In the last few years, I've noticed that I forget a lot more things...from what I ate yesterday to what I was just thinking or doing.  My friend says that you have to be born with ADD but as the days, weeks, months and years go by...I beg to differ.  I can go through a day at home and think...what was it that I did today.  From doing my laundry in the morning and forgetting about putting it in the dryer till a few days later, to even mailing a letter and finding it still on the counter a week later.  For obvious reasons, I'd like to think it has nothing to do with age and that it really is a disease.  Having to make lists for things I have to do is really upsetting and a little disturbing.  Is this really what getting older is all about?  Or is it that we just don't put as much importance on these small little tasks and are easy to forget cause there are more important things in our lives to worry about?  Let's hope it's the later.

Ethics

Does this not mean anything to anyone anymore?  Ok...maybe it's just a pet peeve of mine.  I'm talking to this other guy the I met on the internet on the phone.  We've been talking for probably about a week.  He seems really nice and normal and we've been emailing each other for about a month before that.  Well for some reason today, he hit that pet peeve spot of mine.  So there were 2 instances that really bothered me today.  First we were talking about work and he was asking me about how much I work...so I was telling him how I normally work 8-6 or 7.  He was thinking that was a lot and then I was telling him that the peek time (year end when the auditors come out), I worked from 8-10, 12 and 2 at times.  He was really amazed and kept repeating..."but you get Comp Time right?".  Damn how long has this guy been in the work force....how many companies actually give their employees Comp Time when they are on Salary?  Especially if you're an accountant!  It just makes me think of him as the Stereo Type of the Lazy Ass American who doesn't want to work and get everything for free.  Then we move on to talk about Car Accidents cause the Stupid IT Guy from my last entry got his car hit at lunch today.  We went to In and Out and he got his car hit...the guy obviously did not look when he reversed straight into his driver door while parked!  Anyways, that is besides the point.  So he goes on to tell me that he had a lady hit him in a parking lot in a similar manner except he was driving...well anyways, he said he went to the body shop and asked them to get him as much money as possible...what the hell?  And then he went and took the money (granted...it wasn't that much $1500) and didn't fix his car...he then goes on to tell me that he knows he can get it fixed for only $200.  Is that not ripping off the insurance company intentionally?  I'm sorry but to me...that's just not ethical. 

Stupid IT Guy

So I go into work this morning...and the IT guy comes to my office to chit chat.  I'm sure he means well and was really trying to pay me a compliment but I didn't take it that way at all. 
 
So, anyways, we're talking about my upcoming trip to Vancouver and that I was going back for a wedding...he then goes and asks, "Don't all your friends keep asking you why you don't have a bf or when are you getting married?".  I couldn't believe the question.  Then he tries to fix it by, "Well, I'm just saying that you're an attrative girl and you are almost 30, shouldn't you be in a relationship at least?".  The nerve of the guy!  I gave him such a ear full.  Why does society make it seem like, if you're a woman and not married or in a relationship at the age of 30 it's all over for you.  This is soooo old school thinking.  I know not everyone thinks like this...but I really thought we were making a lot of progress in society and these images of the woman getting old and having to get married had escaped the majority of the population.  This was especially so after the TV break through of Sex and the City and them advertising 30 something year olds not married and having a career.  I'm not saying that I'm not looking for a relationship...it would be great to have one...but it's not everything.  I'm not going to be one of those girls that are in a relationship just for the sake of being in a relationship.  Some people are really lucky and find their perfect match at a young age while others actually never find them at all.  I'm not going to settle for just any guy...he better be my Mr. Perfect.

Internet Guys

So since recently, I've been single...my friend convinced me to post a profile up on match.com...needless to say I did it.  And it's very flattering at first...having a bunch of guys email and wink at you.  Too bad me and my girlfriend are cheap asses that won't subscribe to meet guys...I don't know.  Just the thought of having to pay to meet any guys just makes me think that's not right.  But then again, if a hotty comes by, I don't mind subscribing for him...but of course have you seen the guys on match...pretty slim pickins.  Anyways, so you finally get some guys that are smart enough to spell out their email addresses cause match filters the emails and replaces it with their match email.  That's really discouraging for people like me who don't pay..lol.  So I start chatting with some of these guys and some seem nice and sweet, others seem like real jerks and our conversations end.  This one that I'm really confused about is when your chatting with someone and all along you tell the guy that you only want to be friends, you don't date younger guys and don't mind hanging out at friends.  And things seem to be perfectly fine...we get along great on IM and email.  So finally I think it's ok to talk to the guy on the phone.  He seems really nice and just wants to meet friends since he's new here in town.  I don't think of it as a big deal.  So finally I decide to meet him for dinner.  We go to Faultline and he shows up with some flowers...this is so sweet.  So we have dinner and it's cool...we seem to be getting along great.  He ends up paying for dinner and says I can't pay cause he invited me out and it's an insult...so I let him pay.  Anyways, we go to a movie and it's cool...he seems like someone I don't mind hanging out with and becoming friends with...anyways, since then...he's IMed me and I just wanted to make sure that he knows we're just friends...cause to me...that's not what friends do (bring flowers and all).  And he said he was cool with that...but since then...we've barely talked...is he lying?  Did he want more?  Who knows...maybe I'm reading into this too much and we'll become good friends...and in that case...this entry will eventually be deleted.  Guys should just tell the truth!

Meeting Guys at Bars

So I never normally meet guys at the Bars just cause it was never the thing to do for me.  I'd go to the Bars to just drink with my friends and that's it.  Well anyways, the other day, I was talking to this guy I met online on the phone and he told me that guys are pretty simple.  Just smile at them at the Bar and say hi and they'll most likely stop and talk to you.  So I finally decided to put this to the test yesterday.  We went to 111 Minna for our friends Bday.  And of course I was smashed at the time that I did this cause I would never do this if I was in a sound state of mind.  Anyways, so I'm standing there (and forgive me if I'm telling lies right now cause I don't really remember everything that happened), can't even remember if I was with any friends or not at the time...and I see these 2 guys walk by a few times.  One is kinda cute (so I think) and the other one is tall and slender.  So I look at them and say hi...needless to say, they stop and talk to me.  But I end up talking to the tall and slender guy more than the cute one.  Well, I don't even remember what we were talking about at all...and I don't remember anything that he told me...or how long we were talking for but it seemed like it was a while I think.  Anyways, next thing I know, the bar looks kinda empty and all I see is all my friends (probably at least 10 of them) standing at the bar watching me talk to this guy.  It was so funny.  So the guy realizes that I'm looking at something and turns around to see all my friends looking at him.  Here's where I go "these are my friends" and they just all smile and wave.  I couldn't stop laughing...it was so funny.  Anyways, I don't really remember what happened next but I remember him saying he needed to take off...damn friends...lol.  We exchanged information and one of my friends told me that I just held the napkin in the air to show everyone.  God I was wasted.  Wonder what guys think of stuff like that....

Television

What an awesome little invention.  Since I've been down in Cali, it's something that didn't pay much of an important role in my life...but I'm not sure how I did without it for so long.  Me and 3 of my friends live in the same complex and have not had TV for months just cause we've been too lazy and cheap to get it...don't know what the big deal was...cause when I finally ordered it this week, it ended up not costing as much as I imagined it would.  I guess you just get cheap when you never had to pay for it before.  TV is one thing that is always entertaining and up any time of the night.  It's my new best friend especially since I turned it on this morning and it had like 3 - 4 hours of Beverly Hills 90210.  I may never leave my apartment again!  J/K.