Song Time With Squeaker

As I mentioned last week, Squeaker continues to sing much of the time. Right now I am getting my computer ready for a trip abroad (yes this means playing operating system bingo, but y'all aren't here to read about that....) and she is coloring with her markers and singing:

"Oh happy day, all the dogs have run away!
dibble, dibble, dabble, dabble."

Later, she asked me "Do you want to do 'Snow Cotton White'?" It took three times of her saying it before I both understood her and was sure that was what she was saying. For those of you who don't know 'snow cotton whiting' is coloring in the holes left when stickers are removed from their pages.

One of her christmas presents was the "Tea Party Game" you see below. As you can see, we had a tea party today too.




And yes, the Daddy person has played the "Tea Party Game". No, he didn't win. She cheats, I tell you...

On the Road Again

On the way home from our trip on Thanksgiving I sang the first few stanzas (all I really know) of Willy Nelson's "On the Road Again". My copilot loved it and has been asking me to sing it for her every time we get in the car. I have put it on our playlist and I am trying to get her used to hearing WIlly sing it. For her part, Squeaker sings much of the time, perhaps like Elvis her dialog sounds best when sung instead of said, but mostly her singing is soundtrack to 'autopilot mode' when she is busy playing by herself.

Yesterday she started to convert the "Three Wise Men" song (from the Christmas program) into a song about her friends. She hasn't change much yet, so far the song is simply about her 'friends' following a star.

Here (or perhaps here soon) is a video of her 'travels' this holiday season.



Enjoy the rest of 2009!

The Blizzard of 2009 - Report I

We here at Squeakerpants.com have been watching the snow fall for going on thirty hours, as of Saturday night. As of this posting it is still falling [Saturday at 6:00 pm].

Shortly after I started this post, the power started to flicker. We lost power Saturday night through Sunday afternoon. Before that we explored the snow a bit. Strictly speaking, the Daddy person had already played in the snow. His beloved Volvo couldn't handle the mix of gridlock and snow, so he spent Friday night at a hotel, then got a ride as close to the house as possible and jogged remaining 3 miles home in the snow.



The men spent yesterday digging out, though it will still be a while before the cars can be used again. After we get some work done this morning, we will take Squeaker out to try a luge run we created with my kayak.

Look for some movies and more detail this weekend.

Twas the night before

The Christmas program, and all through Squeakers house, all the creature were eating, except the Daddy person who was off writing exams.

At dinner Squeaker asked her Uncle Mack if he would be coming to her Christmas program. He offered his regrets because of work. Squeaker responded by saying "at least Daddy will definately (loud sigh) maybe be there."

The Daddy person stayed up extra late and got the exams finished (complete with a few typos) and has this video to show for it.



What doesn't show on the video is the emotion behind the camera.

Semesters mark my inexorable path away from youth. Summers become fall, fall passes to spring and I am a year older than I was. Squeaker's time passes differently, in leaps and fits, progress perceptible in a way it is not for me, but unfit for the years by which we measure our own time. Occasionally life makes a point of marking for me both the glory of her growth but also the sadness of her mother's absence.

This program was one of those days for me.

Snow Days and Snowmen

Squeaker had a nice day in the snow today. She started the day with pancakes and ended up spending almost two hours running around with her Uncle Mack outside. That's a big change from the snow last year when she felt the cold more and the fun less. No such problem this year. She enjoyed every minute of her time in the snow.

Speaking of Snowmen, Brite and I were reminded of how much Squeaker loved her 'Nomen in the days of old. Sadly now she doesn't seem interested in them. From what I understand they have been talks with their agents and are considering coming out with another sequel in the spring.

Have a good week and enjoy the snow (if you got some).

Turkeys & Family

Squeaker and I are back from our usual whirlwind tour of the Commonwealth. She and her Aunt Gidget are still trying to figure out how to stop talking and go to sleep when they share a bedroom, with obvious and not unexpected consequences.

Meanwhile, Squeaker enjoyed orchestrating a game of pool. She told her Daddy and Granddaddy which balls to knock down which sometimes took multiple attempts. We even had time for some blueberry pancakes.

Have a good week.

No Post This Week : <

Sorry! The Daddy person was busy being an economist last week (rather than just teaching economics) and was away from Squeaker and didn't get a good post together.

Stay tuned for turkey day stories next week.

Sleep Over

Three nights sleeping over with our Aunt Gidget
Three days without a nap.
Hours and hours of playing.
A big lunch.
Being in a quiet car.

Priceless.

Videos

Its been a while since we have uploaded video, though not since I promised video, so here's a collage of shorts. We enjoyed a quiet weekend at home, something of a rarity recently. Have a good week.

The Empathy Strikes Back

Check-up Time

Not long ago Squeaker (shown here in her Halloween Costume) went to the doctor for her check-up. Part of this year's check-up was a flu shot. She did not enjoy the experience. It took a little while for the tears to cease. Once they did, she had some questions for Brite.

"Why did you let them give me a shot?" Brite's answer was that it was "to prevent the flu". Squeaker then wanted to know "What does the flu feel like?" and sometimes "What different kinds of flu are there?" Every ten minutes for the rest of the day, she would interrogate Brite again (looking perhaps for Brite to change her answers in an attempt to minimize her betrayal). Although she still enjoys playing doctor with her kit, she no longer gives any of her friends shots.


Squeaker on Hair Styles

Last week at the wedding she got to see her Aunt (technically great) Sandra. They even had a chance to play basketball together in their wedding finery. At dinner last night, after a long period of what Brite referred to as "glorious silence", Squeaker looked a Brite and said "I think Mr. B and and Aunt Sandra are the same." Not surprisingly Brite wanted to know way. The answer was that "Mr. B has long hair. Aunt Sandra has very short hair. They are the same because that is different than usual."



The List

Squeaker can be very empathetic when it comes to characters in stories. Most of the time her empathy make sense. On the way to Kentucky a viewing of "Ratatouille" had to be cut short because Squeaker was became unstrung during the storm drain sequence. For any little person, this could be intense, especially for this one, since Squeaker recognized that "drowning" (her word, not mine) was a possibility.

Last night she and Brite were reading "Frog and Toad Together" when empathy struck again. In the story, Toad decides to make himself a list of activities (such as, wake up, get out of bed, eat breakfast, etc). Each time Toad finishes an item, he enjoys crossing it off the list. One of the items was to go for a walk with his friend Frog. During the walk a gust of wind blows the list away. At this point in the story, Squeaker is curled up in bed with Brite and seems to be enjoying the story. Frog tries to catch the list for Toad, but the list is lost for good. Frog comforts Toad and the story ends. Squeaker sits straight up in bed and begins sobbing uncontrollably. Brite doesn't quite understand why until Squeaker blurts out "Oh, Brite, will Toad ever get his list back?"

Brite tried hard to comfort Squeaker while stifling laughter. Squeaker takes the book out of Brite's hands and starts furiously flipping through the pages to see if Toad is every reunited with his list. Squeaker did finally calm down, but Toad was never reunited with his list.

Off to Kentucky for a Wedding

Squeaker and I are off in far can-tuk for a wedding. No pancakes this morning, but we did have a continental breakfast. A breakfast she decided that the table ad looked like a hat. So, as the saying goes, she put it on.

More on the trip next week.

Understanding?

Squeaker has made a couple of trips to target since they put up halloween decorations.

The two that have caught her imagination are a ghoul with a skull like face and a witch. She wants to buy the witch and put it in her grandmother's attic (no hidden meanings here). In one of her favorite Dora episodes, the explorer and a mermaid put an evil witch in a "high tower" an attic is a nice approximation. This fate befalls Hopa when she is bad.

On our first trip to Target she wanted to see these decorations again (as a reference, the ghoul is my height and the witch, while short is taller than Squeaker). While we were looking at them a shopper pressed their buttons and Squeaker was entralled.

I didn't let her press the buttons that trip. I told her that she could press the buttons the next time we went. When we got to the store, all she could talk about was pressing the Stallion's button. After a while I figured out she meant Skeleton. I didn't tell her that's what it was, but Brite did.

We discussed that a stallion was a male horse and despite some troubles with the two words, she got the idea.

I, we really, know she got it beause the next morning she went up to Brite and said "I'm a horse, here's a letter". It wasn't until breakfast when I quizzed Squeaker on the Ghoul that Brite figured out why she had been visited by a "mail horse"....

Bedtime Evolved

Bedtime with Squeaker can be sweet. Bedtime with Squeaker can be frustrating. Most nights it is both. Tonight (yes, Sunday night, fell off the Saturday wagon this week...) bedtime, at least the first time around was pretty easy. She had a bath and we dried her hair, brushed her teeth, flossed, and went into her room for a story. The story went smoothly, then as usual, she tried to get me to tell her a story about when I was a little boy. My telling her another story, after I read her a story, is not part of the bedtime routine. However, her asking me to tell her a story has become a part of the routine, as has my telling her that I am not going to tell her a story. She has been antsy recently when she realizes that it is Sunday and that means I am going back to work. Tonight wasn't any different. We usually talk for a few minutes about the next day. I remind her that if she goes right to sleep, we can have breakfast together. Tonight we, I, talked about our schedule for the week. When I got to Wednesday, she asked me to go. Not in a playful sort of way, which happens sometimes, but in a "Daddy I'm tired and I know what your schedule is this week" kind of way. So I gave her a kiss and hug and headed downstairs.

I got downstairs and heard her chatting with her bedtime friends on the monitor. Things started to get quiet and then after about twenty minutes, she started calling for me. Squeaker will call for us sometimes in order to forestall sleep, but this had a little more insistence to it. We have coached her for some time now to explain why she is calling, specifically if she's calling because she has a dirty diaper to go ahead and say so. For some reason, modesty perhaps, stubbornness maybe, she refuses to do so, so it is a game to figure out why she is calling. In this case, I guessed correctly that she was uncomfortable and would like me to change her diaper.

When I get into her room, she is laying on her side holding her hand up in the air as far is it can reach. I think nothing of her position and ask if she has a dirty diaper. She does, so I get her out of bed and it is in fact a dirty diaper. After I have gotten it changed, she asks if I can wipe her hand off because she thinks she has some poop on it. The hand in the air makes more sense after this request. You have to wonder what would have happened if I didn't guess right about her call. We discussed again that she should tell us that she has a dirty diaper, which I suppose is also part of the routine. Squeaker went right to bed after that and off to sleep within a few minutes.

We have another adventure in bedtime coming next weekend. A backyard camping trip. Stay tuned for a full report!

Short Stories of Squeaker

Preschool: It has been a month since Squeaker began preschool and we've been delighted to see her response to it. This picture, taken on the first day, reflects her mood at the time. She was really excited, but also a little bit nervous. I let her wear a heart necklace of mine as a reminder that our love and God's love is always with her. As we walked into class she was wide-eyed and smiling, but also holding tightly to the necklace. She has become increasingly comfortable there and she often shares about her adventures there.
Preschool is such a fascinating form of education. At dinner the first night, Uncle Mack asked Squeaker, "What did you learn at school today?" She thought for a bit and then responded, "I made a train with my friends. I was the engine." Sweet Uncle Mack assumed they had spent significant time learning about trains during the day, but further questions revealed that the "train" was to teach them how to walk in a line to the potty. He laughed when I explained that it might be weeks before she learned anything other than how to be in school. And yet, this is exactly why Squeaker needs to be in preschool. She loves to learn with me at home by reading, playing, cooking, and being in nature, but there are some many lessons she can only glean in the preschool environment. For example, she really likes playing with one of the other little girls I will call Sally. I imagine sweet Sally has a had a much more loose home environment than Squeaker and consequently has resisted the structure of school. Squeaker has explained this to me in a current events manner each time, "Sally had to sit in time out today because she wanted to play with toys during circle time." I've tried to take each opportunity to remind Squeaker how we all have times when it is hard to obey. I held back laughter when this came up last week. Out of the blue, Squeaker says, "Sally had to sit in time out again today. I just don't understand why she keeps doing that." Then with a very serious expression she says, "Circle time is so fun, I just don't understand why." I praised her for being concerned about her friend, and then we talked about how stubborn we can all be. Then today on our drive home, she very excitedly shared that Sally had stayed in circle time without getting a time out. I celebrated with her and explained that was the same way we felt when she chose to trust us and obey. Her love and empathy for others amazes us!

Thoughts from the backseat:
Squeaker doesn't spend too much time in the car, but it seems to be one of her favorite times to think and ask questions. Last week, she had been looking out the window quietly for a few miles and then brought up an interesting question.
S: Brite, you know my ABC song?
B: Yes?
S: Do you notice that M isn't in it?
B: What do you mean exactly? I assumed I knew what she meant, but I just wanted to make sure.
S: Well, I never say M when I sing. It just isn't in the song.
B: I can tell you have been thinking about that quite a bit.
S: I was singing it a lot during my nap.
B: Well, it comes after the letter L. Most people sing it really fast so it sounds like "elemenopee", but it is really L M N O P. If you slow down it is in there. L M
S: Laughing The M was hiding in my song!! Isn't that silly!
B: Very silly. After some more laughing about that silly M, she says:
S: It is also a funny song because N is in there two times.
B: Really? I know it comes after M, when else do you hear it in the song?
S: Umm.... It goes, T U V, W X Y N Z. See Brite, it comes after Y.
Insert a little bit of explanation and a lot more giggling.

Everyday Fun:
Since many of you don't hang out with us on a daily basis, I thought you might like to see some of our more normal activities. Squeaker is continuing to enjoy using her vivid imagination. This is a picture of her in pretending to be a princess dancing with her ballerina. (Thanks Nana & Poppy) Poor Daddy person was hoping Squeaker would never be interested in anything prissy. I guess we don't always get what we want.






We've also been playing outside quite a bit. Squeaker loves playing with her Ladybug ball and running down the hill as a family. She and Daddy were chasing each other through the yard. Aren't they so cute!















Thank you for your patience about my late post and I hope you all have a wonderful weekend!

Coming Soon! Or Maybe Later....

Don't worry faithful readers, we will have a post this week, but our occasional guest writer (Aunt Brite) is having computer problems and has been unable to get the post online.

Growing up... But not too fast.

Sqeaker and I went to the playground last weekend. In the car she started to sing "let's go to a picnic. We're going to a picnic..." When we got there, a blonde girl was climbing up an offset ladder. As we got out of the car Squeaker said, I think that girl is my age. The first thing she did was touch every sliding board. They were too hot to use during our last visit. Not long after that, she ran up to the blonde girl and said "I think we are the same age.". Her new friend responded by stating that she was four.

Squeaker's response was "Actually, I am three.". At which point the little blonde girl was no longer interesting.

Hanging Out in the Cold Ward

Squeaker has had a quiet week. Her adults have been fighting off late summer colds this week. In fact most of the adults from her party got sick, while the little people all seem to have been made of sterner stuff. She's been reasonably patient with our not feeling like playing all the time. We had dinner outside tonight and Squeaker exclaimed that it was almost fall. While she has some idea what the days are and how the months fit together, she doesn't really get time yet. So, until she pointed out that the leaves were changing, we weren't sure how she knew it was almost fall. It was all about the "de - sid - wus" trees.

Have a good week.

That Time of Year Again

We here at Squeakerpants have moved into birthday season. It is hard to believe that there are about to be a bunch of three year old running around these parts now.

The Daddy person took Squeaker out yesterday to run errands (so Brite could get the party started). One of the trips took us down the snack aisle of the grocery store. She pointed at a big box of Goldfish and asked if we could get it. I noticed that the regular sized bags were on sale, so I started picking out flavors.

Squeaker asked if we could get the Rainbow Goldfish. I saw no reason why not, so I put them in the bag too. When we got out to the car, Squeaker mentioned, beaming, that "Brite doesn't let me get the Rainbow ones. She says the others are better for me."

Clearly, having a three year old is going to present a new set of challenges!

P.S. I might add some video to the post tomorrow if I have time.

Squeaker's Weird

While we here at Squeakerpants.com recognize that our little Squeaker is probably not any weirder than any other child, in our hearts we are not sure about that proposition. We have compiled a short video so that you may judge for yourself on the basis of recent events.



Happy Labor Day! In case you can't view the video, the pictures below give you some idea of what she was up to...

An Open Letter to Squeaker's Teacher

Squeaker went to her first "Back to School" night. The Daddy person resisted pointing out to them that for the guests of honor, the "Back" part wasn't really correct. Along that vein, her heading to school has focused my thoughts on a few things we've taught her. Ok, a few things I have taught her, that might annoy her teacher....

Dear Mrs. Ladybug,

Squeaker spends a lot of time playing with adults. We have taught her a few things that we are concerned about. No not those sorts of things, but her sense of humor might cause a few problems. We play a game where we give round after round of wrong answers to easy questions, such as "What color is the sky? Green, cow, pink, etc." We have had lots of fun playing "wrong answer" this summer. Fortunately we have taught her to use a funny voice at the same time. You see Mr. Ladybug, how this might cause some problems in your classroom this fall.

Also, we have taught her the rudiments of sarcasm. We were eating dinner recently and asked Squeaker how she felt about a recent trip to visit her Grammie and Granddad. Her answer, fortunately in her 'wrong answer voice' was "It was no fun at all. We didn't do anything interesting at all. I did not play any fun games or go to the lake."

Mrs. Ladybug, please accept my apologies for these things in advance.

Sincerely,

The Daddy Person

No pancakes this morning. She wanted cereal instead. Humph. Maybe she can have cereal next Saturday too...

Portraits

For a long time Squeaker has taken her drawing very seriously. We must have sharp crayons, no frayed wrappers, and we like clean sheets of paper. Good thing the Daddy person generates lots of typos and recycled paper. For a while she has been drawing things that are starting to look like what she says she's drawing. In the last couple of weeks, it has no longer required squinting, turning, and imagination to see what she is drawing. I leave it to the reader to decide, but those people are looking like people.

I really didn't think my nose was that big. As promised, we are back on the Saturday schedule, complete with some peach pancakes this morning. Good luck to everyone working on back-to-school. Squeaker goes to meet her teacher on Thursday...

She Did What?

This post is a collection of stories from this week that all pretty much involve the Daddy person saying "She did what?". For example today at lunch time, I was asked by Aunt Brite if I noticed Elena. Elena was, as you see, on the table, in a cup, with a large pink bandage around her neck. Brite told me the gist of the story, but I wanted to get it from the source.

Daddy: What did you do to Elena?
Squeaker: I had to put a band aid on it.
D: Why did she have surgery?
S: I was getting giraffe and the turtle out of her tummy. I cut it open (with the toy scalpel from her doctor kit) and one, two, three, four... and cut them all out.
D: Why was Elena in the cup?
S: I wanted her to be in the cup because I wanted her to be the cup.
D: Ok sweetheart.

By this time she wasn't really focused on answering my questions, because Elena's twin, Stripe, needed medical attention. Fortunately the Daddy person had his camera close by...



Earlier in the week Squeaker and Brite were coloring. Squeaker asked Brite to take down a letter for her. This isn't the first time she's had Brite take dictation. Sometimes she 'writes' the letters herself (lots of lines on a page) but that's a different story. Here's the letter (remember this this Squeaker dictating to Brite.

Dear Squeaker,

Would you like
to go to the Maggie
Moos place where
they have ice cream
and smoothies?

Love,
Aunt Brite

Among the noticeable things here:

• Squeaker usually just calls her Brite now.
  
• Precursor to use of the Jedi Mind Trick.
  
• She remembered their only trip to that joint, and what they ordered.
  
• We, the editors find it to be a little creepy.
  

The next day the Daddy person got some unexpected time hanging out with Squeaker. We hung out upstairs and brought my phone to catch up on some emails. When she came downstairs, she sat with Brite and they had the following conversation.

Squeaker: Brite, you said Daddy would play with me upstairs.
Brite: Yes.
S: Daddy did not play with me. He played with his phone the whole time. So, I played with puzzles, I read books, I made a feast for Elena and Hopa, but Daddy did not play with me.
B: Grownups can't play with you all the time. It would be OK for you to ask Daddy to play with you if that happens again.

The next morning, the Daddy person asked Squeaker if she would like to go play in the play room, and with out missing a beat, she says "Would you play with me and not with your phone?"

We leave it up to the reader to decide how the morning went after that.

That's all we have to report. Have a good week, sorry for the late post. Next week we will return to Saturday morning posts. Really. I promise.

Story Time with Squeaker

If you ask Squeaker what she wants to be when she grows up (or just hang out with her for a little while) she will tell you that she wants to be a "dentist, list maker, doctor, line drawer, a chef, an astronaut, and a story writer." Its this last part of her plan that we are going to examine today. These stories can at times be serious and may not be suitable for small children.



Squeaker helped me make white peach pancakes yesterday. They might just be August's one redeeming feature. Starting week after next, we are going to return to a Saturday 'morning' posting schedule. Classes start soon, so the Daddy person might be focused on "eco - nom - ics" on Monday mornings.

Enjoy the week.

Squeaker's Been Busy

We have been on the road again this week. Boating, kayaking, golfing (she beat the Daddy person by 3 strokes on one hole) and cooking, but we are back home for a light August.

I have a video to post, but it hasn't been edited yet. Check back later in the week!

Back from Vacation

Squeaker has been on the road again for a health dose of family vacation. Contrary to what you see here, she did travel in a car. Sorry for the late post. We returned home last night and the Daddy person forgot about his blogging responsibilities until this morning.

She has continued her relationship with sugar this week with two more visits to the S'mores factory and some wonderful, world famous homemade ice cream from the Conicville Volunteer Fire Department. These 'experiments' gave us insight in to just how rare it is that she gets large doses of sugar and how good a thing that is for all concerned. Before her last S'more she was reclining on the patio telling us how tired she was and looking for all the world like she would be asleep in a few moments if we left her alone. Five minutes after her S'more she was all but shaking from the sugar. At the carnival, sugar+bluegrass = lots of dancing, as well the Daddy person repeatedly banging his head into a wall for having forgotten his camera. She had an excellent time, although she learned an important lesson.

When Momzie took her to the restroom, Squeaker put her world famous raspberry ice cream on a shelf near Granddaddy. When she returned, it was not there. Daddy, Momzie, and Granddaddy were all eating bowls of ice cream. When she figured out where her bowl was, she gave Granddaddy a look usually reserved for the defendants at "the Nuremberg Tribunals" (Editor's Note: His words not mine...).

That's all the news that's fit to print. Enjoy the week.

S'more Please

The Daddy person is back from 'Oz' and glad to be back with Squeaker again. She has been exercising her stubborn gene pretty hard the last few weeks. We are spending time with Granddaddy, Mommzie, Uncle Will, Aunt Amy, and of course the usual cast of characters. We built a fire last night and introduced her to S'mores (you should zoom in on the picture).

As you can tell she enjoyed them very much. She was very patient about cleaning them off her face during bath time too. All the sugar "over-clocked her processor". Put another way, she liked staying up late and having s'mores, so its clear that she put some thought into what she needed to do to get to stay up again some time soon. As things were quieting down she asked:

Squeaker: Aunt Brite, before we take a bath I would like to go for a little walk in the dark. You and Daddy and Uncle Mack and me can go for a walk.
Brite: "Why do you want to go for a walk".
S: I think we could talk about important things.
B: Like what?
S: Well... like how I should obey you.

With that she and the Daddy person walked down to the water and looked at the lights on the lake. Have a good week.

We miss you, Mommy!

Dear Mommy,

It is hard to believe that two years ago today you slipped through our fingers into the arms of God. I know You felt insignificant at times and you would be shocked by the way God has used your life to affect others. At least one person began a relationship with Christ as a result of your life. Many others have a different view of God from the way you lived. This is a wonderful gift and yet I would give anything to have you back.

I miss you deeply, but my heart aches the most for Squeaker's loss. She is a very happy, well adjusted little girl now, but I know she will grieve this when she gets older. The other day we had just finished reading her book before her nap and she just asked question after question about you. " Were you and Mommy friends? What did you do together? Was that before I was in her tummy or after? What did we do when I was a baby? Do you miss her?" Needless to say the conversation led me to tears, but I am so grateful for her interest. I want to tell her all about you, everything I can remember right now and yet it will be so much better if I let her lead. I don't want her whole life to be focused on yours.

There are so many ways that she reminds me of you. Not only does she look just like you, but she have many similar characteristics. She has loved books for a long time, but she has been very focused on animal books recently. We were in the car one day and she asked me all these questions about animals. I could answer some of them, but the rest I had to admit I didn't know. " When I go to preschool, my teacher will answer ALL my questions about animals." For the poor teacher's sake I had to explain that it didn't exactly work that way. "She will teach you many things, Squeaker, but if you have specific things you want to learn about, we can go to the library. They even have a whole section of True books about things like animals. We could find some books about these animals." She was delighted to discover the True Books about jaguars, pandas, African animals, etc. She has listened intently to each book, however long the paragraphs, because she wants to learn. It reminds me of your love of animals and particularly your focus on biology in college.
Another interest she shares with you is her love of music. She often makes up little songs about things she is thinking about. She loves when I have on music and she dances around the room. She pretends to be a ballet dancer at times and then takes a bow when she is finished. There are some personality traits which are strikingly similar as well. She loves order and for things to be put away. She always puts the crayons back the same direction in the box. Even if I have already put them in upside down, she'll fix it for me. How silly of me to think the goal is for them to be in the box! I remember when she was a baby, you named all her stuffed animals. It was so very you to give each little animals value and character. She has never been told that story and yet she does that same exact thing! She creates these silly, nonsense names like, Hobe and Bo Pa, but she remembers them. She also loves real pets as you did. She seems convinced that the four cats we have in residence isn't enough. On separate occasions she has asked to have a fish, a bunny, a horse, a turtle, and a panther. It just so reminds me of your desire to adopt many pets and your persistent question, "Do you have love to spare?

This summer, she has fallen deeply in love with ice cream. We don't give it to her very often, but when we do, it disappears in seconds. On a recent outing with Daddy, she scraped the bowl so much, he thought she was going to eat the Styrofoam. I cannot help but be reminded of someone who upon purchasing a new container of ice cream would eat one spoonful before putting it in the freezer. "Welcome to our house ice cream. You won't last long, but we are so glad to have you."

There are so many moments when I wish you were here to be with her. We are figuring out how to live without you and depend on God in this crazy situation. She feels safe, loved and provided for in her little family of Daddy, Aunt Brite and Uncle Mack, but we know there is a hole. She loves her Grammy, Granddad, Kira, Elena, Nana, Poppy and all the extended family and yet she doesn't know the ache they all still have; the piece of their puzzle that is missing. She loves her Momzie, Granddaddy, Amy and Will, but she cannot fathom the memories of you which break their hearts and make them smile all at once.

Oh dear friend, we walk on through the life God has laid out for us, but we still have a limp. We cheer for you when she tries something new for the first time. I stop what I am doing to see her Lego tower because you're not here to praise her efforts. I hold her for you when she cries and kiss her boo boos. We are firm with her when she tests us because we know you would want her to be raised well. We will keep going, although part of our hearts are still broken. It is an incredible comfort to know that although I am sure you would have wanted to be here, you are experiencing something far better now.

They are before the throne of God
and serve him day and night in his temple;
and he who sits on the throne will spread his tent over them.

Never again will they hunger;
never again will they thirst.

The sun will not beat upon them,
nor any scorching heat.

For the Lamb at the center of the throne will be their shepherd;
he will lead them to springs of living water.

And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes.
Revelation 7:15-17

We all love you and miss you very much.
Love, Aunt Brite

A Special Remembrance

This afternoon we went to Mommy's grave with little Squeaker. We didn't explain exactly what it was, but told her it is a special place we remember Mommy. She sat on the bench and mostly listened as each of the grown ups shared things they miss about her. It was quite touching to hear Grammy, Nana & Poppy describe aspects of her personality and things that made her special. Little Squeaker hopped down off the bench at one point and said, " I want to say something about Mommy. I miss her, too. I liked when she played with me with my baby toys. " We were all moved by her desire to join us.


On our way there, we bought a bunch of purple balloons. (I know they look blue in the pictures, Of course, we also got Squeaker a special animal balloon she could keep.) After we shared, we walked into the open space and released them. It was beautiful to realize that like the balloons, Mommy is free from all the burdens of this life. We can let her go, because Heaven is better, while still holding her in our hearts.

It was quite therapeutic for all of us, but I wasn't sure that Squeaker would get very much out of it. However, all evening she has been asking questions about it. She even took her little train filled with people on a long trip: to visit the place where we remember Mommy. I have a feeling it made a lasting impression.