No siree.

I'm a troublemaker. I told you that come what may, I'd stay by you, but you didn't take my word, and now you're regretting.

Natalie
Fifteen.
Human-Rights Activist.
"Piss off."

Tag if you want
to be mentioned.

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Recommended to Read!
Kodak Moments 1.0 CLICK!
Siti's 15th Birthday
Youtube Featurette 1
Caught on Camera Ep. 2
Caught on Camera Ep. 1
Kindergarten, Find Me!
Blog Wars!
Sex Facts and Thoughts.
Us, Netballers.
Best Of Friends.
Yo Momma' jokes!

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AMALINA
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Using someone else's.

Friday, January 30, 2009 | 11:04 PM

JAGE AH DIRI KAU, SIAL.
damn I'm pissed.
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Okay, got back from lepak-ing with Ilmi and JC.
Better than staying home.

Bedok South vs. Choa Chu Kang Sec.
C Div; won ; YAYYYEEE ;D
B Div; first team 0-0 good fight.
second team; try harder.

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Okay.
Exco meeting tomorrow at 8.30am.
Picnic with Girlfriends after that in the afternoon?
Still on or not, I don't know.
If not, I'll go out with my other girlfriends.

Giving church class a miss this week.
Geeez.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009 | 8:17 PM

I am mentally and physically exhausted.

My LBP's back.
So is my dizzy spells.
Type 2 Diabetic? OMG, no.

Goodbye.

Tuesday, January 27, 2009 | 11:42 PM

I miss..

This;

This too;

And definitely this;

I also miss...

This;

This;

and this too;

Remember this?

Yeah, I miss them.
Heaps.

Labels: Keep them much longer.

"My hyperactive but sweet nephew."

The second day of Chinese New Year was spent solely on visiting.
I only headed to 4houses, but I took up my whole day.
I have not completed my E-Math homework yet and I do not have any intention of completing it.

Gosh, I'm still sick and not getting better.
I almost blacked out today, probably from all the walking and not enough carbs.
Well done Natalie, why not faint again?
I may not be able to get up tomorrow morning.
Two reasons;
One - I am totally knocked out.
Two - I am VERY tired.
Well if I don't show up for school, you should know what happened.

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Sometimes I just want to forget all of you and lead a solitary life.
To distant myself away from all of the events that I no longer find funny.
Then again, I miss all of you heaps.
Especially you.
So now what, what do I do?
Solitaire vs. Surround.

Okay, I best be off now.
PEACE.

Monday, January 26, 2009 | 10:44 PM

How lucky am I to have boy best friend who's there for me when the odds are against me?
I say Very.
Thanks alot.

Someone wrote.
"look into your heart, the beat goes on" lol :)

Natalie Tan wrote.
(: what you do mean?

Someone wrote.
when you say you're giving up, the beat inside your heart still goes on. it means you're not done with the phase just yet. no one really gives up.

Natalie Tan wrote.
Oh, I get it now.
Imma post that quote on my blog.
But why outta the blue you post that?

Someone wrote.
cos although things havent been fine, its just my mind telling me i've had enough. but my heart isn't giving up. haha. i learnt that from a song.

Natalie Tan wrote.
Ahh, I get what you're driving at now.
Well, then in this case I can relate to that.
What song is it BTW?

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"The average fourteen/fifteen year old individual only realizes things going on around him/her-self and inclusive of the ones that recently have been VERY close to him/her. No concern at all for the one who bothered to send a text message out of the blue to ask about him/her."

Hahaha, I gotta agree on that.

"HEY, I skipped dinner. No wonder I'm hungry."

"When I close off that door, when I open you're gone."

Ku masih mencintaimu, melupa kanmu.
我已经受够了你全部的废话，现在你就别理我。
给你自己自由，不想管你什么绘事了。
虽然在我心目中里还想着你，我不要随随便便地和朋友说出我的困难。
因为我知道，你们是帮不了的。

我想念你太多了。
谢了一声。

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Yeah, right now.
I just need you, please.
如果你能知道我指着是你。

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I just feel so bugged now, I have to blog it out.

Natalie's Unconditioning Loves.

MrCrush, the infatuation has long faded away.
All I want, is just a glimpse.
I can't explain myself, its just this feeling that has dawned upon me again.

MrNumberOne, what I hope can never come true.
Love has taken its toll on me, again.
Unfortunately, I have to say goodbye 'cause I know it'll never happen.
You told me, "No matter how hard this gets, this love will have no regrets."
Its still etched in my heart, with your name carved upon it 'cause you were the first to take my heart away.
I miss you most, and I still love you.

BestFriend[F], thanks for always putting a smile on my face.
You still owe me something and I won't forget it.
Love you loads.

Boyfriend[S], what can I say, but a big thanks.
Yes I know I owe you something.

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You can say whatever you want about me.
My friends, I don't give two hoots about the ones I lost.
'cause you all take me for granted.
I'd rather be left alone, then again there are the ones who make me smile and laugh.
Yeah, whatever will I do without them.

Yup, I daresay, I don't have True Friends.
Best friends, girlfriends yes.
Not True ones, why, because you can't put your ultimate trust in them.
Ever since I started over, I have not put my trust in any for fear of history repeating itself.

You have them, they have you.
Yup, I feel that sense of jealousy.
So Goodbye.

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR!

(No we do not look alike)

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This photo's probably gonna be the only time I'm wearing something like this.
From then on it'll most probably be something else.

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Guests have been streaming on from 11am till now, 5pm.
Thank god there's no one else coming over!

I don't have much to post now though.

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There are things bothering me really badly and its starting to affect me already.
Geez, I don't know who do I talk to now.
You know what, I'd rather stay alone and be myself in school, out of school.
Whatever.
BYE.

"I am currently in the I-need-makeup/clothes/shoes/bag-mood."

Sunday, January 25, 2009 | 9:31 PM

As everyone is wishing me a Happy Chinese New Years' Eve, I shall do the same.
HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEARS' EVE
TO ALL MY CHEEEEENA HOMIES!

"I heard that you're a heartbreaker, baby I'm a troublemaker."

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Thaaaaaaaanks for the Starbucks treat that you owe me Imran! ;D
And SUPER sorry for making you wait half and hour.
(I stood you up for Pizza, hahaha!)
Should've studied, but I didn't bring my calculator.
DAAAAAAAAAAMN.
Oh well, after that trained back to Tanah Merah, took 31 to meet girlfies.
I MISSED BABY LIKE .... LA.
Hahaha, well, I still need catch up time with ya'll.

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As every normal New Years' Eve, everything closes early.
Walked around Parkway and left nearing 6pm.
Me and Liting tried on Nail colours, and she slooshed the whole brush on my pinky.
I have one black, and one shiny nail.
YAYEEEE, its cool.
:D
31 home, this 2 minahs in the bus were SUPER talkative.
They didn't sit beside eat other, they sat infront of each other, hence they had to raise their voices to talk.
Alighted at Stadium and walked home, it was raining then.
Got home just in time for reunion dinner.
Siti told me she took the wrong bus home, what a blind bat.

Had table BBQ and steamboat.
:D :D
I am going to indulge myself in the Peranakan food I'm gonna be cooking at midnight tonight, tomorrow.
(Take some time to figure this out yourself)

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I best be off now, I'm attending my culture (Which is, Peranakan) service at Holy Family at 11pm.

MY SEPET BABY SISTERRRRRRR!
(She whines like one)

The book is just for show. ;D
I have no idea what it says in it!
(all the ABCs and XYZs)

Eh; people from BDS who know me, stop staring at my adek (sister).
I know she's pretty, no need to stare.
If she stare at who for whatsoever then tell me uh.
Always welcomed. ;D

Okay, I gotta go!
BYEEEEEEEE!

Saturday, January 24, 2009 | 4:50 PM

"They start with a soft caress."

Faizul owes me Starbucks.
Imran owes me Starbucks.
I owe Sufi Swensens.
I owe Liyi and Azura Pizza Hut/Swensens.
Ilmi owes me stuffs.

Hahahah, wall to wall chats with guy friends are super fun.
Instead of good old MSN, I use facebook.
I'm flooding each of their email accounts.

;D

Syg, you wanted your answer?
You do it by just being yourself.
That's all, I swear.

"As One."

I was reading my juniors' (more than one) blog and I have something to tell them all.

To my C Div' Juniors;
My batch, (The sec 3s) have gone through what you all are feeling now.
But we're different, as (I dare say) we're stronger than most of ya'll in the beginning.
Then again, we have our similarities, we all break up into cliques.
TWO cliques, to be exact.
I have experienced what the rest of you feels now.
There was this girl then, she didn't come for training whatsoever during the holidays and when it was East Zone, she was very enthusiastic about playing and confident about making school team.
(Then again, our team only had 9 girls, so everyone had to be in the team.)
But Ms. Imelda didn't let her play any game.
Take it as a lesson learnt.
Whoever that girl is in the current situation, Ms Imelda put her in maybe because she has her reasons?
(I would not know as I'm not her)
But I know who she is ya'll told me before.

For now, just act normally, don't give any cold shoulders, bad attitude or any thing to show you're mad at that girl.
If the girl scolds you in whatever language she thinks she's good in, hell, let her.
You didn't do anything wrong.
You can let her think she's superior, unfortunately she ain't the captain, so ya'll need not do against what she wants.

For now, DON'T DO ANYTHING, DON'T RETALIATE.
You can talk to her, but not confront.
Anything else, you can just ask me, kay (:

Our B Div' team, is a special team, something extraordinary from what other teams have.
We have a bond, where everyone is friends with each other, we hang out with each other in school, we talk to each other when we walk pass each other, we say "Hi!".
We're not like other schools where the students come just to play Netball and then go off to their other friends after it ends.
Ain't it so true?
(L)(L)(L)(L)

PEACE.

Labels: As One

Friday, January 23, 2009 | 11:44 PM

"She actually thought I was dead. I swear we have some sort of telepathy."

Alright, went to watch the soccer friendly with Liyi.
Bedok South vs. Pasir Ris.
C Div; lost.
B Div; first team managed to put up a fight and kept the score 0-0.
Second team lost 2-0, oh well tough luck.
I FINALLY UNDERSTOOD WHAT OFFSIDE IS!
I had to watch the match first-hand to picture the last defence line.
In the past, the guys had to explain in the simplest terms while watching a soccer match on TV with them.
I still didn't get it.

It was SUPER hot at Pasir Ris sec, no shade, no grandstand.
I almost got the onset of a heatstroke.
Thank goodness I used the cap if not I reckon I'll be in the hospital now.
Syahirah was watching the match from her house upstairs. Hahaha, oh and thanks for accompanying us from school to Pasir Ris Sec!
The whole thing ended at about 6pm, went to TM with many of the guys plus Liyi.
Something happened, I didn't like it.
Thank you Sufi, I owe you a meal ;D
Left at 7.30pm, 69-ed home with Sufi, Ilmi, Zul, Liyi and Sam.
They were singing and I fell asleep in the bus.
(I barely got to sleep in school today. Everytime I fell asleep, someone would wake me up for fear I may not be conscious.)

Hahaha, well, that's about it for my day.
School wasn't worthy of much laughs.

I shall start posting Netball photos now.

I have red hair in the Sun, I swear.

Thursday, January 22, 2009 | 10:12 PM

Slowly, but surely, I know.
Both of you are text the same way.
I need a getaway, I need a break.
I need a quiet Starbucks moment.

"All it takes is just to walk out that door, and never come home, Ever."

Hyperthermia, in its advanced state referred to as heat stroke or sunstroke, is an acute condition which occurs when the body produces or absorbs more heat than it can dissipate. It is usually caused by prolonged exposure to high temperatures. The heat-regulating mechanisms of the body eventually become overwhelmed and unable to effectively deal with the heat, causing the body temperature to climb uncontrollably. Hyperthermia is a medical emergency which requires immediate treatment. Heat stroke may come on suddenly, but usually follows a less-threatening condition commonly referred to as heat exhaustion or heat prostration.

Signs and Symptoms, victims may become confused, may become hostile, often experience headache, and may seem intoxicated. Blood pressure may drop significantly from dehydration, leading to possible fainting or dizziness, especially if the victim stands suddenly. Heart rate and respiration rate will increase (tachycardia and tachypnea) as blood pressure drops and the heart attempts to supply enough oxygen to the body. The skin will become red as blood vessels dilate in an attempt to increase heat dissipation. The decrease in blood pressure will cause blood vessels to contract as heat stroke progresses, resulting in a pale or bluish skin colour. Complaints of feeling hot may be followed by chills and trembling, as is the case in fever. Some victims, especially young children, may suffer convulsions. Acute dehydration such as that accompanying heat stroke can produce nausea and vomiting; temporary blindness may also be observed. Eventually, as body organs begin to fail, unconsciousness and coma will result.

Heat illness, most seriously affects the poor, urban dwellers, young children, those with chronic physical and mental illnesses, substance abusers, the elderly, and people who engage in excessive physical activity under harsh conditions.

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Yes, I had a minor heat-stroke today after the Netball match.
Thank you to Shahirah, Shanadya, Edna and Vanessa for helping me.
Thank you to all you guys out there who cared and asked about me and how I felt.

If you're curious, I had heat exhaustion + over-exertion.

We lost to SAC, 34-13.
Yup, you guessed it, we got trashed, but we kinda anticipated that already.
Hard luck.

School was great today, had some laughs.

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Okay, I just got scolded by Her again.
Honestly, why do I even bother to put up with her nonsense every single time.
I have done no wrong from 1st January and you're killing me every single day.
Can't you ever see why I hate you so much?
This morning you screamed, yelled, shouted at me for something so meagre.
Just now, you did the same thing yet again over a small issue.
Ask yourself why I'm like this, no, I'll give you the answer.
Its 'cause you're never home.
By never home I mean, I leave early, you're asleep, you come home late, I'm asleep.
Then again, you don't stay with us anymore, even though the house is under your name, you don't stay with us.
You'd rather reside at the other house and when you come back home here, you scream and shout at me.

Motherly love?
I beg to differ.

"No more, no more. I had enough of crying because of you."

Wednesday, January 21, 2009 | 9:17 PM

"Dime si el dinero te compro, dime si esa es la rason, que te aguantas, cuando sabes que tiene tantas como tu. Y'eres muy hermosa para que, no te trate como su unica mujer
Piensalo bien, yo te quiero tambien."

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Ohmygod, my house is in chaos.

Swimming was A-to the-WESOME!
Sunburns and Oranges eh Az and Fad?

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School mates are weird now.
With all the askings of whether I like any guy, as a friend.
Then they'll go on to asking whether I like him anymore than a friend.
Ke-la-kar la.

Kay, I'm tryna get back on track with school work now.
It feels weird not attempting to do them.

A'aight, I'mma elaborate tomorrow.
Right now, I'm downloading songs, songs and more songs into my shit ass MP3.

PEACE.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009 | 4:30 PM

You have a safe flight back to Perth, ass!

I'm home!

Nothing much happened today.
Its becoming a drag for me to start blogging regularly.

Imma' just post up short messages I wanna pass to people.
Go figure.

To Person ABC;
You didn't do anything wrong, you were trying to help.
Well, obviously someone doesn't need it hey?
Don't worry, you have me (:

To Person XYZ;
You forgot who your girlfriend is and left me for a douche.
Thank you very much.

To Person 123;
Just a little too not over you.

To Person 098;
Thank you for today.

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OMG, DON'T YOU JUST LOVE THAT DOUCHEBITCHBAG?
Hahaha, what a slut I am.

Monday, January 19, 2009 | 10:32 PM

These few days I've been away from the computer and spending time with my cousins.
They've been coming over for dinner for a few days now.

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I'm currently sick, so its tough for me to concentrate properly in school without having to fall asleep.
Nevertheless, I'll try to study hard though.

Alright, recap of today.
School and tourney.
Versused Damai Sec, and no offence, they were not THAAAAAAAAT strong as I had heard from other teams.
I am still not feeling well, I still can't smell.
I only got my sense of smell back for a short while.
Yeah, we got trashed by 24goal points.

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Kay, someone owes me Starbucks, and I need to go see the doctor.
Someone accompany me?
PEACE.

Sunday, January 18, 2009 | 12:43 AM

Alrighty, I've got a new email.
All of you add me up kay?

its now; natalie.april@hotmail.com

PEACE.

Saturday, January 17, 2009 | 5:18 PM

Yes people, Natalie's sick.

"Three words have not been said in a long time."

Right, and I suppose I am to apologize again?
Yup, you guessed it, I lost it today.

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This shall be a quick post, I gotta get back to studying POA.

For the past few days, I have been going home early, studying and sleeping early.
Bonus, I enjoy doing it.
Yes, I may get lonely, but it'll rub off soon enough.
No, I'm not saying I can't do the same with the company of friends.
Friends vs Studies.
Both are equally important, I wanna do well in both aspects of life.
Why, can't I do it?

On the other hand, I know some people don't like me.
Be it guys or girls.
I'm not mentioning names.
But do me a favour, if you hate me, or if you don't like me, please do not pretend to be nice to me.
You're deceiving no one, but yourself 'cause I can see it from your face.
Yes, people do talk about me, maybe even bitch about me.
Yes, I have more guyfriends than girlfriends.
Yes, sometimes I forget who my friends are.
All of you should know, I have my flaws.
Everyone does have flaws as no one is perfect.

I have said my piece.
Anything, look for me to talk alright?

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Shas, we've got nothing going on.
Syg, I promise I'll tell you soon.

PEACE.

Thursday, January 15, 2009 | 9:30 PM

Natalie, do not lose it during Netball tomorrow.

"Way back when, we first started the plan."

Okay, I'm doing a quick post as I have to get back on Biology.

Nothing much to blog about school.
Yes, I had extra class.
Yes, I went home myself.
Yes, I REACHED HOME within 30minutes from dismissal.
Bio ended at 2.50pm today, I reached home at 3.10pm.
Early I know.
It feels great to come home early now.
Maybe its because I have that drive to study and my sister's usually on the computer wasting precious foundation time.

I got to study time, TV time and I had a proper lunch.
After a whole year or longer of not going home early.
I'm going to make it a plan to go home not later than 5pm.
Possible?

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I saw familiar faces that made me smile today when I was downstairs.
You guys know you are.

Yes, yes.
I've gone quiet again, maybe even thinking of M.I.A.
I'm not gonna sit around and waste my time moping about the things that's been happening around or to myself anymore.
I'll just take them in my strides, 'cause this is what part of life is.
Little tiny steps, we're back to basics baby.
No more frontin'.
What goes around, comes around.
I ain't gonna bitch about you, you or you anymore.
(Well, maybe for you hardcore bitching 'cause I hate you sooooo much.)

"An angry Natalie is an angry Netballer." - Jaypee.

HA, my phone's M2 Stick just reformatted itself.

Wednesday, January 14, 2009 | 9:30 PM

Pure stupidity.

You beat up an innocent kid for what, playing duelmasters?
May God CONDEMN ya'll to hell.

Utterly stupid.
I'm currently lost for words.

I may be a little late, but still, its sick and wrong.

You beat up an innocent kid who's about 5years your junior whilst he was playing Duel Masters.
Whereas, one day 2 gangsters came and created trouble with you even though you were with 9 others.
You didn't dare to hit.
Puh-lease, what impression does that give me?
Simple, ONE WORD.
COWARDS.
Heaven knows if you EVEN know that young boy.
Well, I can't say much as I'm just someone who listened in on what happened and not witnessed it.
But honestly, do you really think that with Muay Thai and long pants you can really show your kick-ass business off?
Think again yo.

I'll be glad, that you both are put in a boy's home.
Why?
To start with, I have never liked you.

What a disgrace to not only our school.
But to our 2009 Secondary 3 batch.
Not to mention, one of the two of you is in the smartest class and the other is at the tail-end.

UTTER DISGRACE AND PURE STUPIDITY.

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That's all I have to say.

Labels: Pure Stupidity.

Overdue photos.
In order of events.

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Ilmi want's this photo up for himself.
LOL.

FADH'S PARTY.

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I'm sorry Ilmi, I just have to post these up.

I'll give you chewies and lollies kay?

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CCA FAIR.

I'm done!
But there's till loads more.