The thing about being a mom is that no one ever says thank you for the things that make being a mom so hard. Like getting up over and over again in the night with a new baby, or disciplining a kicking-and-screaming toddler. As a mom of not quite three years, I’m pretty inexperienced, but I’ll bet it’s pretty hard to come by a teen who thanks their mom for setting a strict curfew, or taking away privileges when rules are broken. I doubt many thank you’s are spoken to seasoned moms who lose sleep over poor decisions made by their adult children, or for the tears shed and the prayers uttered over a wayward son or daughter. Sure, my toddler thanks me when I give her treats, or do something special for her, which I appreciate, but quite frankly, those are the fun parts of motherhood. I don’t often get thanked for doing the things that push me to my limits and really make me stretch.
I don’t mean to sound ungrateful for the many expressions of thanks that I receive from my husband and children each day. They are wonderful, and I love the way they show their appreciation. It’s just that being a mom has made me realize that I need to show my gratitude a little better to my own mom. I know now that there is so much more to thank her for than making good meals, cheering me on, and setting a good example. It’s time to show gratitude for the hard things she did, the things that no one appreciated, and the things that made her a truly great mom.
Mom, thank you for carrying me in your womb, for being willing to experience the sickness, nausea, vomiting, fatigue, hormonal wackiness, weight gain, and general discomfort that come with pregnancy, in order to give me life. Thank you for getting up with me, night after night, for losing sleep, for feeling like a zombie, for not having a chance to take a shower, or really, do much of anything for yourself. Thank you for the sore arms you got from carrying me around when I didn’t want to sit contentedly in my swing. Thank you for cleaning all the spit-up and poop. Thanks for putting up with the baby food slinging, and the refusals to eat veggies, and the screaming tantrums for a lollipop.
Thank you for disciplining me as a toddler, thank you for putting me in time out when I misbehaved, and for sacrificing having a cute and stylish house in order to have a safe and kid-friendly one. Thanks for making me wear my seat-belt. Thank you for brushing the tangles out of my hair, and for letting me dress myself, and for limiting my sugar-intake.
Thank you for waking me up for school, and for making me go to that service project. Thanks for letting me experience the consequences of my actions, and for loving me after a fight. Thank you for saying “sorry” when necessary, and for forgiving me my blunders over and over again.
Thank you for saying no, when I wanted to go to that party, and for saying yes, when it made you uncomfortable, but I needed the room to grow. Thank you for praying for me when I was having a hard time, and for all the nights you worried about me. Thank you for checking up on me when I was trying to get away with things, and for paying attention to my friends and boyfriends. Thank you for putting your foot down, thank you for not buying me everything I wanted, and thanks for making decisions based on what was right, not on what was cool.
Thank you for giving me freedom when it was time for me to leave home, and for letting me make decisions, and learn to be responsible. Thank you for letting me learn some lessons the hard way, for letting me learn to be a mom, and for respecting my parenting choices even though you probably know a better way to do it.
I realize now that being a mom is HARD, not just because you have to cook and clean and juggle schedules, and do laundry and chase kids, and keep up with a zillion activities, and grocery shop, but because you have to make choices that are painful, you have to say no when it’s easier to say yes, because the sleep deprivation doesn’t end when your babies start sleeping through the night, because you never stop worrying about your kids, even when they’re not kids, and it’s no longer your job to protect them. It’s a hard, sometimes thankless job, but to my own angel Mother, my sweet Mother-in-law, and to moms everywhere, thank you for doing those hard things! Those are the things that make you great. Those are the things that shape your children into who they become. THANK YOU for being a Mom, especially when it’s no fun at all.