Dave and I were recently invited to speak on a panel to discuss our choices for educating our children. We represented both the public school community (go Hickory Hounds!) and the private school (Dave is Elementary School Head at Calvary Christian). Through that, and then an online conversation with a friend today, I have been able to articulate my heart and passion for walking this path that has been laid out before us. I wanted to record some of my thoughts here, and hopefully in the meantime encourage others as well. It is a wonderful and freeing thing to know where you are called, and to grab hold of that with both hands.
I have heard enough (direct and indirect) comments over the years to know that our choice for public school does not sit well with everyone. And that is ok. Our decision to go this route was partially practical (since I worked full-time up until last year), but also Spirit-led. I am thankful that there has been such sweet confirmation over these years that this is where God has us. I have countless stories and interactions stored up that have built in us such a confidence and surety that this is where we are supposed to be. We see the fruit of it and we know God has directed us here for the time being, and I believe we are making a difference where we are. Our impact on the school and community has shaped and strengthened our faith and confidence. We really do love our school.
We have had our share of challenges. There have been things spoken to and around our kids that I was not ready for. Yet God has settled my heart and taught me that so much of it is about how we as parents respond and exemplify love to these broken families in our community. (It should go without being said - our daughters' safety and well-being is primary, and we do what we need to in order to cover and protect them). We are watching them (and their hearts for others) grow incredibly because we are showing them that we care for the "naughty potty-mouth" (for example) boy that might sit next to them. We are committed to take whatever steps are necessary to prevent further issues, but more importantly, our kids are watching us try to love the unlovely. Oh, what a gift that is to them. And as God gets a hold of their little hearts, they are growing in their understanding of how to be light in darkness. That is a big burden for them to carry, but they are not doing it alone. They are "on mission" - just like we are. And I have seen them come home with a twinkle in their eye because they told someone about Jesus, or reached out to a lonely classmate, or heard about someone else who is a Christian, or told someone we've been praying for them. These are things I could not spoon-feed them - these are the effects of living life as our family is called. It excites me to see God at work in my girls. And when we do have to address difficult things that come up, He is teaching me to push deeply into Him, so that I do not sin in my reactions.
Even today, I awaited an after school report from my eldest on her attempt to make amends with a girl with whom she's had some problems this year - just normal 4th grade stuff, but we asked her to take the high road and reach out to attempt to make things right (even though, in my mama-bear fleshly opinion, the apology should be initiated from the other side!). But her heart was willing to be humbled and tender towards someone who has been unkind to her on numerous occasions, and it was well-received. Her willingness to apologize is better than I can say for myself on most days!
Our deepest desire is that our children grow up so deeply rooted in Christ that they cannot help but bring Him with them wherever they go. I can only pray that they will thrive in the public school system - that is truly our heart's cry - and time will tell. We take each year as its own - trying not to assume, but rather to allow God the freedom to change our course, knowing He will lead us and help us be willing to obey.
Dave and I have a deep conviction that strong Christian families are a necessary part of the public education system. Every morning we pray on the way to school - and one of the regular prayers is that my girls would remember Jesus is with them, and that they would act in ways that both honor and please Him. There are kids who live around the corner, down the street, etc that need a dose of Christ-like love. There are families with which we would never otherwise have contact. There are broken and dying people who need a glimpse of a big and loving God, and if He would allow our family to play a small role in that introduction, than I humbly accept that call.
There are plenty of things that I hear about public school that can cause me to want to worry, but I am resolute that I will not let fear guide me (2 Timothy 1:7). I want God to guide our family, and use us to represent the kind of love that we can only find in a perfect and kind God. And when we fail, we will get back up and continue to try to honor Him in how we love others. I love that God did not use a cookie cutter with any of us - that what I am called to may not be what others are called to. And sadly, we will experience judgment and hurtful words until we can all embrace these differences, and support one another in being who and where God has called us to be. We have wonderful friends for whom we have a lot of respect that have taken different educational (private, homeschool) routes, and we applaud their obedience and the dedication they have to live where they are called. Because in the end, that is all that really matters. To please Him and Him alone.
(now, if only I can remember that in my weak and insecure moments!!)
