Yesterday marks the countdown of one more month till my 21st. Wow, 21 already, yet another milestone reached. I still remember thinking back when I was 8, I kept telling myself that I still had a long way to go before I take my PSLE. Fast forward time, I have already graduated with PSLE and O's certs as well as a diploma. Time is like running water in a river, the same water will not pass by twice. The water will eventually end up in a the sea. We cannot rewind time no matter how much we wish to, and whatever decisions we make then will eventually lead us to here and now. I've regretted making some decisions, have asked myself a tons of What If's, but I learned to embrace them all and let the chips fall where they may.
Speaking of 21st, I don't have that many friends to have an extravagant celebration at chalets or whatsoever. I've seen lots of people having such celebrations and posting the pictures on Instagram, and sure, of course I'm envious and wish I could have the same. But 2 things, I don't really like such huge events where there's heaps of people, and I don't have that many friends. I can count on a handful how many close friends I have, which is exactly 5. It's whatever really. I mean sometimes I do get sad over the fact that I only have so few close friends, but at the end of the day I'm still thankful for them, 'cause I'd pick a few close friends over a huge group of normal friends anyday. I wished I had kept in contact with my primary and secondary cliques, but no point regretting when I hadn't even made that much of an effort back then.
For my 21st, I would be contented just having to spend it with my loved ones and close friends. The quantity of the company doesn't matter, the quality is what counts. Also, I'm travelling to S.Korea with my poly friends in 6 months time!!! Much excites!!! So many things I would like to try to accomplish when I'm 21. Question is, do I dare to?
because i finally realised, not that i deserved better, but it was never meant to be at all. and you not wanting me doesn't symbolize an ending, but rather a new beginning for what is about to come. x
I suddenly remembered that this space existed, and I spent a good amount of time just reading back on the posts and reminiscing the good and bad times. Safe to say that I was in a slump during my upper secondary school days, like wow at the amount of emo-nemo posts lol. I also realized that I used to type in really proper sentences, with proper grammar and punctuation and such. But I seem to have forgotten how to do so now? Like I'm too used to typing in singlish lol. Oh well, takes time.
Hmm, so 2 years since I stopped posting here. That's about 730 days, right? Oh god I forgot how to do mental sums. Anyway, too much happened within this 2 year period. I graduated with my diploma (yay me!), I fell out with friends whom I thought were real, I made new online friends, but most importantly!!!!! I. GOT. A. FREAKING. JOB. That's right guys, this girl right here is currently a full time preschool teacher. Holy freaking cows, it has been like 8 months since I first started???? Nearly a year!!!! This job taught me alot, and made me realise that while I dislike the workload, I still do love the children. From teaching PG to K1, I'm struggling but I believe I'll survive (fingers crossed).
I've so much to say, but too little time. Time check: 01:15AM. I've got work tomorrow, my K1s are visiting the Singapore Philatelic Museum tomorrow. Now that I've rediscovered this space, maybe I'll start using it again to express my thoughts.
P/S. I can finally say I've gotten over A. But now I seem to be having dreams about D? Oh god.