Encounter with a bird

Yesterday at grad cell, we found a bird in the house. He was alive but not well. While Jamie and his housemate debated on what to do, I just sat...and looked at this bird. I can't usually get this close to a bird and I don't usually 'feel' for animals. But as I sat and looked at this bird, I felt him looking at me..and strange as it may seem...I felt sad for him. Something about this bird made me connect with him, sympathize with him, but i couldn't pinpoint what.

I don't know what was wrong but he was trying and trying to fly and I could see his effort. He would seem to muster up all he had, get into the right position, and spread his wings out...and let out all he could...but to no result. And then he would stop still..and rest...seeming to regain energy to muster enough to try again. I knew, and both Jamie and his roomate knew that this bird would die without help. But I was helpless. I couldn't do anything to help him. I couldn't meet this bird's need. I didn't even know what's wrong. What he needs is someone who knows what is wrong AND who can 'fix' it. like a vet.

This morning when I woke up, I thought about this bird.
And you know what? The bird's situation reminded me of our Christian life. We try and try and try on our own, thinking we have control and give all we can to not sin, ...to be good...but to no result. We can't see that we need outside help. But God knew that we would die without help. However, unlike me ..with the bird, God knows our needs. He knows what is wrong AND he is able to meet us there. I think, I'm learning to have faith in God's character, and trusting him to take control (since he already does have it) to realize how much I do need Him.

Blessed = )
I never knew how to upload pics before...but just found out that it's not that hard..so I thought I'd put some in :P

Grad cell has been a group of people that God has miraculously placed in my life not by coincidence. Somehow he knew I needed people in the same 'life stage' to share with.... AND though I normally find it 'tres' hard to share with new ppl, i warmed up to this group very quickly!

<--Fondue party :P Alex's bday ----------->





My teens...God really show me at the Overflow Conference how blessed I am to be able to work with all these teens = ) AND it was a wonderful reminder of how GOOD He is, and what He has called us to be: Salt!

<--Can you see what they are trying to spell?








<-- Nathan's Birthday

Needs

So we all know....that every person needs food and water to survive. Research has also shown that every person needs love. Babies and Children need love to grow the way they are supposed to.

One thing came to my mind today... I don't know if research backs this up...but I think that Every person needs someone who believes in them. Someone who believes the best about them even when acts don't prove it. Someone who will hope in them even if everything they produce is hopeless. Someone who can see past the failures to see their potential. Upon reflecting, I can recall various conversations with parents that show this. Against all odds, and perhaps beyond all reason, they still believe. They choose to see the best. Sometimes it's in excess, and it adds pressure on their kids. But sometimes...it's just what's needed to give hope, and the possibility of success. Maybe that's what we all need. God believes in me. In days like today...I wonder why, I wonder how....but he does. And that matters.

I was thinking today...how interesting it is... that someone you've never met could make such a difference in your life....

My dad did not grow up in a Christian family. His family was not rich when they (as kids) were growing up...so....my dad would often go to this neighbouring family's place to study since it was quieter. This family became his second family. It was through these people that my dad came to know Christ, started going to church, fellowship (where he met my mom), and therefore ended up here...where we are now.

My dad was the first in His family to come to know Christ...and told his brothers and sisters about Christ. God used his godparents (the people next door)..who perhaps at the time...were just helping out a kid in need at the time...to give me the life I have now. It's interesting how people are connected. How people are invested in by people that they don't even know. Or...the scary/exciting thought that...I...may be affecting someone else in the future...for good or bad. I don't think my dad's godparents foresaw this effect...they were just obedient to everyday living as God had given them...and God worked through their simple life.. to affect not only my dad, (little did they know) but his brothers and sisters, and now the next generation...us. In a crazy way, I know Christ because of this man (my dad's godfather), because of his faithfulness in doing the ordinary. He has now gone from this life...and as I reflect (usually i don't think so much about this)....i know it affects my dad...but I hardly knew this person....but yet in some roundabout way....it matters. Not just cuz it matters to my dad...but also...because somehow this man...has made a part of me. It makes me think of what I'm doing today...am I being obedient in my ordinary life? As the bible says....often we don't reap the fruit we sow... but it doesn't mean....God isn't working.

Quick Answer to Prayer

So...I was at Badminton tonight = ) And about 3 weeks ago, (when my dad was away), I was waiting for a court when another member at the club...noticed the shirt I was wearing (a UWO shirt & commented that his niece was going there next year) and started a conversation. This is kinda out of the blue. Most of the people there keep to themselves...unless you strike a conversation. So...I went along with it. He's a really nice guy. We talked for a little while and I mentioned that I was a new teacher. (on a side note...this guy....has forgotten my name now..and calls me "Faith" haha...and i feel too badly to correct him)

The next time I saw him, he told me that another member of the club was a principal at a Christian school in waterloo and I should talk to him. Let's call the principal Mr. T. So..the last 3 weeks i've been looking for an opportune time to talk to Mr. T. But he's very busy...and talks to a lot of ppl and I don't like to butt into ppl's conversations. So I haven't had the opportunity.

So today when I got to badminton, I wondered if i would get to talk to him. Then...when he was sitting....and talking to others...I said to God...if you really want me to talk to him...you haveta make it obvious cuz...well i feel silly approaching him after so long. I didn't really 'pray' this...i just had this thought.... Anyways...slightly after i had the thought, Mr. T. starts walking towards the side of the room where I'm sitting and I happen to look up and smile. Mr. T. comes over and talks to me!!! And i think...wow! God is quick to answer my prayer. :)

FACING MY GIANT

Yesterday was Tuesday. Why is that important? On Tuesday afternoon, I volunteer for a program called strong start which helps Kindergarten & Grade 1 children to build more confidence in their letters, words, and sounds. I meet with the same kids each tuesday...to play games to help them build these skills. This is a commitment I made. So when I first got onto the supply list a few weeks ago...I had put into the computer system that I am not available on Tuesday.

So that being said....here's what happened on Tuesday.
I went to the school where I volunteer and just after the kindergartens get into the classroom. Brring... the classroom phone rings. It's for me. I think it's the VP calling to ask me to supply for another day; instead, I'm talking with the lady at the board office. This lady has called me a few times before...and hasn't been very pleasant because I haven't been able to take any jobs she's offered.

Our phone conversation sounded something like this..:
"So I see you're volunteering at Laurelwood"
"Yes, I am"
" You do realize you were hired on the emergency supply list AND you haven't taken any jobs"
" Yes, I do..."
" We hired you NOT to volunteer but to take jobs" (I realize this! O_o) "If you want to volunteer instead, I can take you off the list right now if you'd like." (What?!? So i'm in shock...)
" We need you to supply today at P.M. public school. Do you know where that is?"
" No.."
" It's in Elmira" (ELMIRA! O_O i'm terrified of driving on the highway.) "Don't worry, I'll give you directions" ....so she gave me directions...and I'm panicking. How am I going to get there? I have to leave NOW. and go NOW.
"Um...what grade am I going to teach?"
" I think Grade 6" (i've never taught Grade 6 b4 ....and I was hoping that my first supply job wouldn't be grade 6). "By the way, they've already started, so please get there as soon as you can"
-end of conversation-

So swirling in my head was... " I can't do this" , "This can't be happening", " Elmira...how am I going to get there?" " Grade 6??? I can't teach grade 6" "I'm already late???? That means I show up ...and i have no time to look at anything. And then I became very frustrated/angry with my parents because they had told this lady where I was.

I rush home to gather my stuff together. I wasn't prepared for supply teaching. I wasn't expecting to need to go. So I went home...and started yelling at my parents...while trying to look up exact directions to this school...and grabbing my supplies bag. This is NOT what I thought I would be like for my FIRST supply job. I was upset that my parents would put me in this predicament. So I leave my house frustrated.

Breathing deeply, i get into my car and start driving...at first...still very frustrated...and thinking I really can't do this. But I remembered the moving I watched with the teens this past weekend "Facing the Giants". I knew all along that supply teaching is a GIANT for me. It's too big for me. I feel it's impossible, too uncertain, and i"m not ready. However, in this circumstance, it seemed even bigger. All the things I was afraid of plus more....happened today. I felt like I forced myself to focus in the car.....and in this focusing....I feel God allowed me to calm down. I let go of my frustration of the shock of the situation, frustration with my parents...fear of failure, fear of teaching grade 6....and started praying (eyes opened of course :P) . I knew I would have to face the situation. Remembering the movie....I remembered that Nothing is Impossible with God. And that no matter what happens today...God gave me this opportunity and He'll bring me through. And no matter the consequences, at the end of the day, I will praise Him. With that...i was able to calmly call my dad...and make sure I was heading in the right direction to.. P.M. public school.

I don't want to write all the details here....cuz it's already getting long. But...on the whole the day went alright. Not perfect. Far from it... but it could've been a lot worse. I know though...that God knew me and was with me through it all =)

It was a grade 6-8 school. Luckily, I was teaching grade 6....cuz...if they had called me in for grade 8 I might've freaked out. The Lord knew me.. He knew I wasn't ready. So he gave me a day where the teacher taught the same lesson to 3 different grade 6 classes. Also, a day where the teacher had two spares...giving me time to breathe...and think ... The behaviour in the classes weren't great. Not really unexpected since I am a supply teacher. They tried to push their limits. But surprisingly...God gave me peace about it. They weren't super quiet or superly well behaved...it was manageable...and I remained calm throughout the class (which I didn't think i would..). IT was april fool's day yesterday which could have contributed to behaviour. Probably not the best day to supply teach. But....no one pulled pranks on me by God's grace. ...they did to each other though....which is a possibility why they were louder.

At the beginning of the day, I saw this day...as a nightmare...teaching grade6 (of all grades), in a foreign place (ELMIRA), in a foreign school, and to top it off....with NO time to think/prepare. At the end of the day...after reflection...and looking back..I see God's grace...in it....I see God let me teach grade 6 rather than a higher one, letting me improve my lesson...as I taught first class vs. the last class, take care of me on April Fools Day, and giving me peace...despite the behaviour. And letting me drive all the way to elmira to give me time to process what was happening.
I can look back and say that I'm glad He gave me this opportunity (even when I dreaded it in the morning). I can look back and not be upset with the lady at the board office (after all ....she was probably desperate...as my mom pointed out....since my last name is....well "W"). I can look back and praise Him = ) So....unexpected circumstances...yes.. what I least wanted... yes.. but ....also. worth it. Thank you God = )

So why is tuesday important? Because ...it threw me.. off guard...and because of it...it made me rely on God...something I should learn to do for all the jobs that I will take after this. = )

Snowed In...
It's a beautiful snowy day from the inside..:) hehe...but well shoveling is another story when you have a driveway as long as we do :P I shoveled a couple of hours ago...but it looks like I did nothing. It amazes me how quickly things can change the surrounding around you. Weather seems to be one of those things. One moment, the ground is bare. The next, a blanket of white covers it all. Or the miracle of spring. One moment, all things on the ground are dead. Next, somehow....they can live after the cold/harsh winter to produce beautiful signs of life.

Teen's Conference is in a couple of days. We're leaving tomorrow actually. I haven't been to teen's conference in .....well....a lot of years. I'm not helping out with it but I am going with the youth to "chaperone". It will be interesting to be on the other end of things. Instead of being asked to sleep early, I will be doing the asking. O_o Praise the Lord that all the logistics have fallen into place ie/ accommodations, rides etc! So...we'll see what this week has in store.

A change is coming....
After a year of waiting....it seems that the Lord is starting to open doors on the job front.. We'll see where I'm heading. This means decisions are very close ahead. I've been reminded....that good leaders always have an answer to everything. They might not have "the" answer but "an" answer. They step up to meet the challenges that face them each day, without running, with faith that God will bring them through. This is something I lack. I feel I never have the answers I would like....and in movies, I find myself admiring more and more people that step up to do things that are just asked of them.