More talk

I finally know Mr J's full name - from the various testimonials by doctors and charitable organisations that he showed me yesterday evening.

Jai Ram Singh, born a British subject in present-day Pakistan, when that country was under British rule. He earned his medical degree in Agra, the city of the Taj Mahal. Later on, he came over to Malaya to work in what is today known as Singapore General Hospital and KK Women's and Children's Hospital. He then quit and opened his own clinic, Siglap Surgery, along Upper East Coast Road. He ran his practice downstairs and lived upstairs. While he was trained in surgery, he specialised in "making your eyes and lips look good and ridding you of your scars, with a special technique", he said.

This kind doctor would charge $2.50 to $3 for medicine and sometimes wrote off his patients' bills even if they didn't ask him to. Other doctors charged the usual $10 and more and accused him of undercharging. But he said he merely wanted to make medicine affordable for his patients. Plus, he only needed to make enough money to live simply. He also pointed out that Singaporeans wanted good service and effective medicine, not cheap drugs that couldn't cure them.

Mr Jai also volunteered at missions hospitals in India, and I think Malaysia.

Today, because the orthopaedic doctors he visits knows he waived his patients' fees in the past, they also do not charge him for his visits. And, I finally know what he has been suffering from since 1980/1981. It's arthritic-osteoporosis. He said he's always hurt in the back, but only a month back, the pain became very severe. I've also seen the huge bottle of pills, and packets as well, that help kill his pain.

It did occur to me that perhaps I've been too naive to believe everything a stranger says. But I don't think he could have forged all those yellowed testimonials. And he speaks too well to be considered an "ordinary" person. Somehow, I feel so drawn to this old man, it's really weird. There's just something about his mannerisms and kind eyes that makes me just want to care more.

Ever the gentleman, he's always placed a table on rollers between the both of us when we talk. I think it's got to do with the fact that he cares about propriety - he did mention he didn't want me to think that he would take advantage of a lone girl like me. Well, it's quite amusing actually! With his unsteady gait, he could never do anything untoward to me!

I just can't stop thinking about him. Well, more like worrying. Went to the temple to check if they could deliver food to him. Dead end there. Called up Toa Payoh Methodist Church to see if they wanted to link up a cell group to befriend him. They will get back to me about the possibility.

Right now, I think the best thing to do, seriously, is to wait for Monday when he can call Touch Home Care again to arrange for an appointment with the lady in charge. I'm praying he qualifies for the programme cos it covers meal deliveries, home help, some healthcare etc....Perfect for him. Hope it doesn't cost too much too.

It's terrible growing old alone. I just hope he never EVER falls. His bones are too brittle to withstand any such force. Oh, he's getting a phone soon. Great! Then it won't be so difficult contacting him anymore.

I chanced upon Mr J

It's been too long since I last wrote.....two months? Well, today I just had to write. Welcome back slumbering gal.

Not many pple know this story, but there was this 78-year-old (think he's Eurasian) man I met at Braddell MRT station abt two months back. His spine was arched like a mini camel's back. He carried a plastic bag in one hand and with the other, he tried to balance himself as he shuffled - what I believed was 5cm at a time - towards the turnstile. The stranger acting as his crutch looked so much to be in a hurry, I decided to take over.

When I probed, he offered part of his name, told me he was married with no kids, wife had died and he was on his way to shenton way to see his doctor for his spine problem. He was walking perfect just three months back before the spine problem attacked. Feeling a pang of compassion, I got his address and visited twice. He lives alone in a cluttered three-room flat in Toa Payoh. Well, the third visit was yesterday but he wasn't home, so I left a packet of lunch, seven 10-cent coins for him to call, and contact numbers of welfare organisations he could dial. Now to think back, apart from feeling like I really wanted to help, I was also intrigued by his perfect English, sense of wit and humour, as well as independent spirit - which I witnessed in that brief 10 minutes I led him to the turnstile.

In fact, he just called with a conversation that I didn't know to take as kind advice or a chiding. He offered thanks, but firmly said he wanted to return my coins. Then he said: "Don't go out of your way to be kind because this is a cruel world. I'm offering this advice from my years of experience, remember I told you I was a doctor? People can misconstrue your kind intentions, so don't go out of your way to be kind."

As soon as he said that, because I'd offered to visit him today or tomorrow, he asked me to give a time. And then he said: "Well remember I told you I have testimonials from my ex patients? I want to show them to you, so you can decide if I'm a parasite or a service to society."

What do you say to an old man who tells you this?

I'm curious to hear more stories about his days as a surgeon, plastic surgeon and missionary doctor to Pakistan, India and other countries. I'm even more excited to hear his philosophies and beliefs about life.

It feels like Tuesdays with Morrie. Only that today's Thursday.