The book of Philippians~!

I just finished reading the book of Philippians in one setting. I realized that there are many things in which I could learn from, especially from the Apostle Paul and his theology.

• In Phi 1:13, Paul stated that he is in chains for Christ. what a perspective of one who is in Christ and living it for the sake of Christ and the Gospel.
  
• In 1:18, Paul's framework of the Gospel sharing, he is clear that your motivation in preaching the Gospel could be wrong, but what is clear to him, as long as you are not preaching the heresy! Paul rejoice~!
  
• Epaphroditus, a fellow worker, brother of Paul (2:25-30), a man slave to Christ, for he almost died for the work of Christ, risking his life for the advancement of the Gospel!
  
• In Phi 3:3, "For it is we who are the circumcision, we who worship by the Spirit of God, who glory in Christ Jesus, ..." wow!!! the Spirit of God glory in Christ Jesus! loaded words of theology there by Paul. God glorify in Christ Jesus, I can only link it back to the word of John the beloved. The Father glorify the Son, the Son glorify the Father. the Spirit of God glory in Christ, hmz... need to think more...
  
• "Many live as enemies of the cross of Christ" (3:18), the passion and love of Paul is shown in this verse. He loves the people of Philippi. He is in tears for the people he called to witness and share the Gospel with and ask them to repent.
  
• In 1:2 and 4:23, the grace of Jesus Christ is mentioned in both places. I think Paul is writing from a perspective of God's grace and therefore mentioned God's grace as the center of his letter and everything else in between the heading and ending is grace-oriented perspective.

I have not reflect the book of Philippians much in details, but I thought the verses that struck me as stated above. Wow! So much to learn... never-ending learning I supposed!

"Therefore, my brothers, you whom I love and long for, my joy and crown, that is how you should stand firm in the Lord, dear friends!" (4:1)

reflections...

Clearly, there are so many things that i am thankful to God and God alone~!!! Praise to God as He allowed me to go for my theological studies, definitely it is not an easy journey to begin with... but indeed a journey of grace...

a journey of grace is not what i would called these three years, but rather for the whole part of my life, i think it is definitely a journey of grace to know my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

moments that speaks to my life in these past three years:
1) the death of my loved one - My father

clearly, it is indeed one man's death inspired another to live, it is not the quantity of life that one lives, but the quality of life that one lives. my father has live a life of quality, why would i say so? it is because of his life, how many lives that he has touches, how many lives he has ministered in the process.

when my father's death, there was a pastor from the AOG church came up to me to say that he was converted because of my father's witness to him when my father was all passionate about God. it was then and there, this pastor give his life to God, but only Heaven knows that he becomes a pastor of a church and he was blessed by my father. but hearing this, my heart was blessed, to know that my father's life was not wasted, at least there was one life that he surely touch. and surely there are many who are touched by my father, many would have blessed by my father one way or another.

before my father's death, i did not know that he was a pastor at his younger days, clearly this is something that i have never thought of. all my days as a campus crusade staff, when i am serving the Lord, my dad did not told me of his past, all he did was to encourage me to be faithful to the Lord. he did not share with me his love for the Lord, he model it when i was young. he taught my heart to fear the Lord in my growing up days. telling bible story to me, praying with me and my elder brother before we sleep at night, singing songs to our Creator, going to church. he did not preach his faith to us, he model.

2) my mother's conversion - God breakthrough my mother's heart

after my father's death, the most unthinkable thing happen, my mother's conversion. it all started at the death of my father. i challenged my mother to forgive my father, i know that they have hatred against each other, clearly, both of them could not stand the presence of each other since i was at a tender age, that is where they divorced. by the grace of God, my mother's heart was break-in by the sheer power of God, a devoted Buddhist who goes to the temple every first and fifteen day of the month, to offer sacrifices on behalf of our family. at the death of my death, my mother understood grace, forgiveness and love.

why is this possible? My mother realised that most of the people there for my father's wake for two nights was mostly my friends - church friends, campus crusade friends. it was such a powerful testimony to my family members. even my 3rd aunt says, "the people coming are 80% Ron's friends." if you were one of them reading it now, i thank you for your presence!

when all is lost, that is when you realised that Christ is all you need. how true is this statement. my house was break-into after three days after my mother agree to be a Christian. clearly, it was not easy for her, but it is definitely faith-taking step for her. she lost everything, but she gain Christ. what a beautiful picture~!!! =). Philippians 3:7-11. is Christ worth it? this is clearly something for you to think.


3) a student of the word is a servant of God

as a student in Trinity Theological College, i witness many people who are there for their own agenda, their own motivation, their own purposes. some clearly wants to publicize themselves, to sell themselves. but i wonder have they clearly understood the Gospel as a whole? many gifted people who are there are mostly interested in academic pursuit and not interested to serve the community. they are clearly coming in just for themselves, not willing to serve the community, not willing to help others to grow in the Lord, settle down and helping them to transit into the local culture and all.

i remember in my first year, i offer a suggestion to my first year classmates to help our international friends in their English, to be friends with them, to help them in this transition. one truthful yet painful comment was, "they are all grown ups, they can look after themselves." OUCH!!!

are we believers of Christ? are we following Jesus? why cant we love them? why cant we talk to them? why cant we spend a bit more time with them even though all of us are transiting? can we not help them even though we are struggling ourselves? are we in a Christian college or have we follow the world so much that we are individual entity?

conclusion: not all who profess to be Christian is a Christian. not everyone who study the word of God is a servant of God.

4) convenience Christianity?

this is my FE seminar reflection topic, "convenience Christianity." Christianity have reached to a point that only when it is within my time, my scope, my area, my limit, i will serve God. is this the kind of Christianity that Christ has model for his people? i could not remember any part of Scripture that speaks of Christ has done things in the name of convenience.

this understanding of convenience Christianity is I-centered Christianity. the primarily concern of service is whether i can make it or not, not looking at other people's centered. how sad that this truth has slowly sink into the church as i m blogging now. O Lord, have mercy on us.


5) God's grace used up?

at my final lap of my third year, at the second last week of school, my laptop crashed due to a software corruption. some of my works are done way in advance, so i panic and cried out to the Lord for help, for mercy~!!! a number of assignments i have finished, but have not submitted, cause i wanted to take a final look before i submit. so at Good Friday morning at 2am in the morning, my laptop crash. i thought i used up the grace of God. i thought that grace was not coming my way anymore, i thought that God have enough of my nonsense, enough of my sins, enough of my ego, that he decided to punish me completely. God's grace used up was the only thing in my mind.

in short, i am clearly thankful that God's grace was not used up, one can never used up the grace of God. i m able to continue in my submission of all my papers, as the hard-disk or mother-board did not crash. i m still able to retrieve my software and after a series of re-formatting, all is back to square one, grace was there, cause God was there.

6) I give up, Lord!

"I give up, Lord!" at the start of my 3rd year, i surrender completely to the Lord regarding finding a life partner, this was the cry of my lonely heart. I only want to finish well in my final year, i wanted to please God, i dun want to chase after skirts anymore, my objective is clear for the year. I give up! means i surrender O Lord. No more looking at girls who i believe that can be my future girlfriend and then wife.

a heart of surrender found its way in my lonely heart. all i wanted to do was to dwell in the presence of God and his holy Word. nothing else i wanted. yet at my final year, there are many 1st year female students - young and single and available. yet at that point of time, there are many classmates of mine, asking me to choose, this girl is a good choice, that one also very good choice and all.

i went back to the Lord, "Lord, what a way to start the new year! first, you asked me to surrender, yet you send tons of temptations in my way. What are you trying to do, Lord? have i not surrender to you?"

i realised that it was at this point of surrenderedness, God provides. the rest is history. =)

7) journey of mercy

journey of mercy, to met my girlfriend, Karene, to finish studies, to enjoy and celebrate my mother's conversion, to endure my dad's death, to be able a student of God's word and a servant, to know God is with me all this while.

my father is a carpet king...

today (22nd Feb 2011) marks my father's second year death anniversary. my emotions was well-kept i suppose. I did not want anyone to know that it has been two years since then.

My heart was not sad...i wonder why? but somehow i would remember this important day that my father passed on. is it a case that my father was with the Lord and therefore i am not so sad, but rather rejoice that the fact, that he is with the Lord?

I have fought the good fight, I have run the race and I have kept the faith...2 Tim 4:7. this verse was the verse I picked for myself and for my father as a sign of God's faithfulness.

It is not just an reminder for me, but it expresses God's faithfulness in my father's life. I guess with whatever my father has done in the past, he still know that the Lord Jesus Christ is his Lord and Savior at the end of the day. And this is due to the faithfulness of God.

My father was a pastor at Butu Pahat in Johor Bahru when he was in his younger days. He was trained theologically, he love the Lord, so much so that he went to M'sia at a tender age to preach Christ and Him crucified. I wonder how he is like when he preaches. Does he preaches with a fiery and dramatized voice?

His nickname was "carpet king", this was given to him because of this statement said of him when he was very successful and earned a reputation of selling carpet. "Anyone who can sell God can sell carpet!" Wow! What a compliment that was said of my father. But from this statement, one could read quite a lot into it.

why do i say so? assumption taken is that my father is a very eloquence and persuasive preacher in his younger days. if not, he would not be able to sell so much carpet that people gives him this nickname. or other people presumed that he is able to sell carpet with one experience of preaching the gospel.

i do appreciate that my father is a carpet king however, I appreciate what he passed down to me at a very tender age. when i was staying with him, he often read the bible with me, explaining to me patiently about God and Christianity. he prayed with me, share with me many biblical life example from the Bible. I did not know what impact he has made until i reflect and think about the past.

He is not just a father per se, but he teaches me the way of the Lord since i was young, a strong foundation in my growing up years. i still remember bible stories so well that i ever won bible quiz in my primary school. i could answer it well. all these is done out of love from my father, Tan Hung Leng, Raymond. He does not come across as a spiritual giant in my life, sadly, but I think in a way, to know that he was a pastor in his younger days, helps me to be focus on God's ministry in a way and set me thinking about my future ministry.

on 25th Feb 2009, I committed myself to the Lord into the ministry of word and sacrament, it was not a decision influenced by my father and his past, but it has been in my heart coming to Trinity Theological College to study. God was the one who convicted my heart, was the one who challenged my heart for his flock, his ministry and the lost. more importantly of all, "i want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, to attain the resurrection from the death." (Phil 3:10-11)

My prayer as I enter ministry soon...pls pray for me if you are reading this entry...

O Lord, reveal to me your heart for your people and challenge my heart to do likewise.
O Lord, reveal to me the depth of your love through Your Son, Jesus Christ.
O Lord, reveal to me what you have install for me and reveal it to me in your own timing.
O Lord, reveal to me what it means to be humble before the authority of God's word as i preach Your holy and living word.
O Lord, reveal to me your grace that is always sufficient for me.
O Lord, reveal to me the fullness of Your glory.
O Lord, change my heart, to be like Yours through the Holy Spirit.
Amen.

in two days time...

reflections on preaching...

suddenly it dwell on me, one of my greatest passion in life, is to preach Christ and Him crucified. over the past 3 years, my greatest concern as a preacher of God's holy and living word is whether I could hold on to pulpit. It is a great responsibility, which I dare not play around with. It is a ministry that I hold dearly to, a ministry that demands all of my creative writing, narrative telling capabilities and the work of the Holy Spirit.

there was a Sunday, where I heard a sermon, so much that I want to take over the mike, I was so painful and sadden how one could interpret the Scripture that way and speaking out of context. My heart was super broken, I believe Jesus' heart was in the same state as mine. If it were a poor delivery of skill, I can accept and accept gladly, but to misinterpret Scripture without understanding the context and justify with personal experience was something too hard for me to swallow.

I do not think that I am a good preacher of God's word, everyone is still in the process of sanctification in terms of hermeneutics and homiletic. But what I cannot stand was Christ was not preached at all~!!! Not that all sermons must preached about Christ, but if the text surely touch on it, why ain't we preaching about Christ, then?

O Lord, would you guard my heart deepen rooted in your word. keep me humble before the authority of your holy word. soften the condition of my heart to listen to your voice. Amen.

Contentment~!

Words from a grateful heart

Praise God for his unfailing grace, for the church’s support in three-year Bachelor of Divinity course in Trinity Theological College. I want to sincerely thank the church leadership and your faithful provision over the last three years of my studies. Without the church’s blessing in sending me to study in TTC, I do not think that I would ever have such an opportunity to learn more about God and His Living Word.

The church as a whole has not only provided me with a spiritual home for the past 13 years, but KPC and her leadership have also allowed me to make mistakes, given me grace and shown me love and trust as I worked with the youth and young adults even before I went for my studies. Of this, I want to thank the leadership for embracing both my weaknesses and my strengths and for being willing and intentional in developing me as a whole.

Thank God for the grace that was extended to me.

What has God been teaching me over the past 2-½ years in TTC?


There are many things that I have learnt over the 2-½ years that have passed.

First of all, God is more concerned about my relationship with him than my results as a student. But saying this does not give me the permission to be slack in my studies. Over the course of my studies thus far, I have learnt to take time off without feeling guilty to spend time reading the Bible and to be still before the presence of God. I have learnt that spirituality is never about the grades that I have gained or the badges on my chest, but practicing the presence of God through prayer, everywhere and anywhere I may be.

Secondly, I realised through the course of my studies that there are many things that I do not know, and this truly humbles me. The overwhelming readings of theological books and journal articles have made me feel very small and insignificant. There are so many theological debates to handle and doctrinal issues to tackle as part of my curriculum in TTC. Up till now, I still do not know a lot of things, but one thing I know for sure: Jesus loves me this I know, for the Bible tells me so.

Lastly, I have learnt what it means to be contented in God, just like the poor widow who out of her poverty put in everything she had, all she had to live on in Mark 12:44. Her contentment in God allowed her to trust God for everything, even for her next meal. This speaks volume about her faith in the Lord and his faithfulness. Likewise for me, I am learning to recognise that God is all I need and I must trust in his faithfulness and his grace. Contentment is the word that I am learning during this season of my life, and it is very hard to put into practice. So I hope that you can be praying for me that I may be contented in God.

What’s next?

I met up with Elder Wei Ming over lunch in October, where he expressed the openness on behalf of the EDC and the session. Of course, I too express the same desire to come back and serve the church that have shown me grace upon grace.
I will meet up with the EDC and the session this coming December to finalise the details. Thank God! =)

What are some of my prayer requests?

I will continue to learn to be contented in God and God alone, and dwell richly in the word of God and in his love.

I will continue to walk with God faithfully each and every day.

we can be sincerely convinced of something that is very convincingly wrong!