its called psychology and i know it all. hehehe. i cn consider persuing my degree in psychology cause i seem to have gotten a hang of it. and and and. i can seem to know what ppl are thinking nt by reading their minds. bt by the way the talk, their body language and also facial expression. n i find it super cool. hahaha. ok.

so aniwae. lets talk abt yest. first thing. i almost fainted on the way back hm. yes. reason being i did nt sleep the night b4. rushing out projects and stuffs. n also doing sumtin that i really shudnt be doing at that tym. so yeah. then i had to go to school in the morning. and work next. so it caused me a very terrible headache at work. n thnks a lot. i had a very wonderful sis who offered to help me work my hours till the shop closes so that i can go back hm early. awww. ILY sis. bt anw. on my way hm. i almost fell a few tyms due to the very blurred vision. it makes me feel like mmm i am floating. n in the bus i ws half asleep and kept getting hard knocks when the bus brakes. so when i reached hm. i ate medicine. n then i went dead. yes. n i ws lyk bloody hell supposed to do my econs. and then suddenly. i heard my mum calling. she ws like 'adik tk pegi sekolah' me half asleep with a splitting headache was like 'pukul brape nie' and she was like '10.30' (actually its 10. she always does that) n what i did was like. 'ahhh. i havent did my assignment.' turning to my sis who ws still asleep 'kakak arh. tk kejut orng. dh suro sey kejut smlm' n so i on my comp n check if my attendance rate for econs ws still 100% n ws super happy when it ws. so i ws lyk 'm nt going to school arh.' n off m comp. ate med n went back to slp agn. till err. lyk 4 pm. n yes. so i slept a total of like. mmmm. 15 hrs or so. omg right. hahaha. so yeah i skipped school today. ellyana. ellyana. bt anwae i found out my sis woke me up several tym between 1.30 till 3 am. haha. its just that i didnt wake up. haha. ok. i gues i ws super super tired.

ohh anw. i guess i shud lyk tell everyone this. i dont really take calls in the morning. yeap. seriously. so just msg me in the morn aite. i'll reply bt if you call you cn be sure that i wont pick up. some of you might have noticed.




today was mmm hilariously fun i should say. almost my whole family came to my house because of this thing going on. so yeah. i cud say that i no longer feel that hatred towards my dad by the middle of the day. i dunno why. bt it just went off. so yeah. next up. karaoke. yeap. with my kuzzins. its been long since we went out as a whole kuzzin together. yeap n i mean whole. the 6 of us. thats my whole kuzzins. the others cn go fuck off. the arent my kuzzin animore eversince. so yeah. planning time. and thank god. things with her finally settled. finally settled even though its nt cnfrm yet.


i finally realise i am not fit to say anithin. i just dont have a place in it.




i wonder why ppl get the aftr crying effects. you know the ones where you like. mmm. its kind of diff to describe. its like you are gasping for air that kind of thing. mmm. its sedu-sedu i think. thats what its called if m nt wrng. n also the effect whereby you get very tired and sleepy. hmmm. the tired and sleepy part is mayb for you to sleep and then forget everything when you wake up ltr on. thats really clever of 'HIM' to make our body work this way. bt sleeping really does work.

i've never felt so pissed like this b4. that was just very unreasonable of hym. i never had this kind of feeling of hate b4. its like as if i hate hym so much nw. so much. that i dont wish to see hym. atleast for the tym being. the last tym we fought. it took us long to reconcile. and its also thnks to my uncle who gave me this very long lec. bt hey. things wud nt turn out these way if he had atleast be more reasonable. m always in the wrng. why. because. oh well he made me. and m bloody hell his daughter. damn it. does he really wants all of us to hate hym. oh well, i dont wish to do that. cause i know whatever it is. he is still my dad. be it gd or bad. cause for atleast i know that without hym i wont be here in this world. bt i really dont understand hym these days. its like the older he grows the more unreasonable he gets. god damn it. i dunno hw long i can take this animore. i know avoiding is nt gonna solve anithin bt atleast i guess it'll stop my hatred.

n nw. there is this huge comotion about her. wth. its like. when will problems ever stop appearing. its like. i already said. she cn do whatever she thinks is right for her. bt just pls dont turn the whole world upside dwn. or for atleast my life and just let me have peace and quiet. you are disrupting my bloody life and bloody hell causing her tears. and if you dont realise it. its my mum's you are talking about. and ohh btw. she is yours too. why wont you just start thinking if all that you've done or going to do is the right thing. dont just follow your stupid wants and be so hard headed. damn you.

i really need a get away. away frm all these frustrations.


mood: totally pissed.

FuCK IT!! dont think i'm gonna submit to your bloody unreasonable request. i rather not go and stay at hm than to say those words to you. you are just being overly sensitive. damn it larh.


i had a great tym today. went out with yan and safi to the movies. and then just walking aimlessly. n then meeting D at night aftr separating with yan and safi. and yeah. its was a day.




someone who is like mayb arnd 7-10 yrs older than me actually called me kakak. KAKAK. WTH. do i look that old. damn. mayb he just think he is still young. haha. tk ikut masa berjalan. hahahaha.


i seriously do not know what i am angry about. bt apparently i am too angry to even sleep. oh wells. mayb its the thing of the month thats making me feeling like this. warghhh.

so things happen today. things in which i don't have the right to say anithin. i dunno. mayb i just think much more than the others. maybe i think too deep inside and really focuses on every posiblities that cud happen in the future. but since i dont have the right to say anithin. i'll just let it happen n see where things go. i am nt cursing her or anithin. i hope that everything goes smoothly. bt i've had this feeling all along. yet my words are just being ignored. so what cn i do. i tried to avoid the pain and miseries frm happening. so if it really happens which i so so so hope nt. dont blame anione. you've only got urself to blame. i tried stopping you bt you just wudnt listen. wateva it is. lets pray it doesnt happen. wish you the very best of luck.

ohh. i found somebody's blog yesterday. i cudnt help but laughing at hw his lyf hv been. hahahahaha. i wish i cud laugh at his face. haha. what telah happen mann. where is like all those errmm 'brothers' of his? hahaha. gone. missing. pdn muke beruk. hahahahaha. i know. laughing at others miseries. i shudnt be doing this. bt yeah. he started messing with my life first. so nw that i have a chance to mess with his. so why nt kn. hahaha. shall start thinking of a marvelous and beautiful plan to kena kn that bloody stupid beruk. m anger seems to have subside nw thinking of that beruk's supposedly-to-be-ohh-so-wonderful-lyf. haha.


my knee is acting up agn. i seriously dunno whats up with it mann. suckish. n yes. finally projects almost all done. m so happy. i cn finally celebrate during the remaining one week. yay. first up. hopefully shopping with parents 2moro. i need to buy a shoe. pumps. bag. wallet. many many more. cant wait. i love going shopping with them coz i dont have to pay for stuffs. eventhough mum would like you know mum. they have taste so diff frm ours and try to influence them to us. n then refusing to let me buy what i want coz according to her its nt nice. n when that happens i'll resort to dad. thats why. its gd to have both of them arnd. hehehe.







baek uh. projects are destroying my holiday. its basically ruining all my plans. drats.
n nw he is back agn. adding miseries to my life. might as well destroy it kn. warrgghhhhh.





my phone bill is like wow. my dad just nagged. omg. m so gonna be broke this month. thnks to my phone bill. warghhh. ohhh. my mum long gave up to pay for my bills. cause its always high every month. sooo i have to pay myself. mann. this sucks. have to go find better plans with more free mins of outgoing.

so anw. i just watched this cerpen. on suria. it got me interested. its a story about this two 12 years old kid. a boy named syahid and a gurl named zan. who was so so close. ok. you cn say its kind of a love story. they were so sweet together. so they played and do almost everything together. zan was kind of a tomboy (her name is actually su) while syahid was a hearthrob to many of other girls out there. bt then he wasnt interested in the gurls. so zan acted as his gf. n so they were always teased by their friends as being a couple. then there ws this day when a girl who like syahid gave hym a heart bracelet. so zan then told hym that when a girl gives a guy a heart bracelet it means that she wants to go steady with hym. for a guy its blue and for a gurl its pink. n in that scene. syahid said that he knows in zan heart she actually really want the heart bracelet. then he almost confessed to zan when they were cut in by the neighbourhood bullies. n so. then one day. zan ws infected with chicken pox. she had to saty at home and cant go out. so syahid came to her house. bt zan ws ashamed so she did not open the door. bt then syahid did nt gave up trying to meet zan and ended up staying with her outside while she was inside. he brought her food. they ate together. talk. all that separated by a door. (sweet kn. they are onlie 12 you know)

then one day syahid ws called in by some the bullies to play woth them. he played with them n frgt about zan. zan waited all day bt he did not come. at night he called her lying that he has to help his dad. frm that day onwards he kept lying to her. until one day when zan was well enuf to get out. she then found out syahid ws lying to her. then frm that day on they fought when syahid push her dwn while trying to help they bullies and left her there crying. so on the day of their psle results. syahid waited for zan. he then told her she was moving and gave her this little thing. he said that it ws his new add and his phone num. n that they cud chat on the phone. zan ws still hurt that she did not accept it and threw it on the floor. syahid was sad. 10 years ltr. zan ws informed that syahid had passed away due to a car accident. so she then went to visit. there syahid's father gave zan the thing that was nt accepted by her years ago. inside it ws his address. n also a pink heart bracelet. so the thing ws actually a way of syahid confessing to her. (sweet kn) the end.

haha. i wondered what will happen to them if onlie zan were to accept the thing back then. hmmm. so cute for this to be happening to 12 years old. haha. it gets me thinkin. what were i doing when i ws 12. haha. its kind of cute nw thinking back hw your life were back in the past. especially in this part about relationship. nw. looking at my bro. their relationships sees to be more advanced compared to ours back then. i guess. this is life full of memories. nice ones. unpleasant ones. watever it is. it makes the person in you. haha. so philosphical.




ok i just realised sumtin. about my previous post that i say i kind of dislocate my knee. its nt actually that serious. abng said that if i dislocate my knee. i cant walk. n then so he said mayb its just a muscle pull. or just that i tore my muscle. sumtin lyk that larh. i dunno he is an athlete so what he said shud be right. bt it seriously hurts so much right nw. n guess what he asked me to drink soya bean. omg. SOYA BEAN. me. ellyana. drink soya bean. you cn wait long long larh. so i think milk wud be the best substitute right. hmm. i'll drink milk then. STRAWBERRY MILK. yay yay.


i have lyk 3 cuts. one blue black. and kind of dislocate my knee. and it all happened today. bt it ws fun fun fun. bt anwaes. i have lyk many many many projects today. ellyana being ellyana wud always do things in the last min. n so. i have to rush leadership report by thurs. n guess what. i have nt evn started. econs report materials by fri. econs indi report. fnb recipes and collation to a nice menu by the start of term. leadership group project materials + meetings. (n ohhh we have nt even started or think abt it yet) ohh what more. POM?? n all that we only this two weeks holiday. it isnt that long okay. n then there goes my holidays. i stil have many many outings which i really look forward to go to. nnnn they are zouk-ing out. omg. i want to go. aiyo. n who says that poly life is very relaxing. its like omigosh okay.







you know. i only wished for you to be atleast a little bit more reliable. your words to be atleast the truth. its my only request sayang. but yet. its just another wish. i finally realised that wishes don't come true. request not always too. goodbye. its time to move on.

Uninvited Personnels, Keep Your Comments To Yourself.
Cause I Am Like Oh So NOT Interested To Know What You Are Thinking.

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