Friday, 11 July 2008
Reflections:
Through this module, i've learnt several life skills such as anger and listening.
Recently, it has been increasingly stressful as I had to cope with both my studies and my long term commitment- band. As i take a second and look back, i realised that there are at least two occasions that i've flared up- one of which was during a group discussion to improve the video we did for LMS.
As we had barely a week left to complete the project, i was getting quite anxious and in fact, worried that our grades would be affected if it was not completed at the end of the discussion. As the discussion began, there was numerous interruptions by two members. They were talking about something unrelated to LMS. Thus, when they interrupted the discussion, i raised my voice and gave a "black" face soon after. It was only several seconds after that i realised that i had expressed my anger in a rude and unacceptable way. Soon after, I knew I needed to control my emtions in order for the work to be done. It was no use for a "cold war" at this point of time. Thus, after a few minutes of silence, i decided to lighten the mood so that it wouldn't be too tense and awkward. I cracked a few jokes and apologised to my friend as well. I'm glad i did that because I managed to control myself and I felt much relieve after doing so.
Besides anger, I've also discovered what listening truly meant. I've learnt that when someone is expressing his/her views, it is not enough to just be a listener. Instead, a person must be a GOOD listener. I had a deeper understanding of it through a survey i did during LMS class on listening. While doing the survey, I realised that most of my responses were "Occassionally". For instance, I occassionally tune out people who say things that do not interest me. As i reviewed my answers, i was rather surprised. How could i simply tune out when my mum was nagging at me- in other words, spacing out. If I were ignored by my listener, I would be pretty annoyed- not to mention others.
Interaction with teammates~~
In terms of satisfaction, i felt more satisfied in the completion of the second group assignment. In the first assignment, it was rather disappointing because we barely knew each other and weren't close at all. It was difficult to communicate as everyone was pretty quiet. During the skit we did, there was a communication breakdown as we did not have frequent practices together. The same goes for the tasks like powerpoint slides, preparation of props and the allocation of the roleplay. As not everyone volunterred themselves/ others to do the tasks, we were quite hesitant as we didn't want to offend anyone. But after the first time, there was a lot of improvement in the second one.
In the second group assignment, it was done in a form of a video. Everyone took it much more seriously and most were enthusiatic about the roleplay. All of us gave ideas to add "flavor" to the video. Furthermore, i feel that we grew closer and enjoyed ourselves during the time we filmed the video. Even though there was friction between me and the two members, I was glad that the friction didn't lead to a conflict as my friend held back and simply completed the powerpoint slides.
Through these incidents, I've witnessed how quick-tempered i could be at times and even since then I've been giving my self constant reminders to keep my cool and think rationally- from the perspectives of other parties and how i would feel if someone did the same thing to me. In terms of listening, it is an important note to myself that a listener is someone who really makes an effort to listen and respond how he/she truly feels about the issue. In order not to repeat my mistakes, I made it a point to note down the ineffective listening styles- selective and word listening, spacing out, pretending and mind reading.
Finally, I feel that i had become more aware of my surroundings as well as myself. For instance, when an assignment has not been completed, i should help out and control my emotions. I've also discovered that it is important to think in different perspectives before acting in that particular manner. On top of that, i've learnt that the tone i use matters alot as well.For example, when i'm initiating a discussion, i must set the proper mood and i could do so through the tone i use. As a member in my group, i understand how stressful it could be and so, while doing a project, i could spur my friends on with encouragements and asking them if everything was alright or not.
I've truly enjoyed the sessions I had in LMS and I will never forget any of this- never(:
The End
Friday, July 11, 2008
Sunday, April 27, 2008
Reflection on: Self Awareness and Self Esteem
Sunday, 27 April 2008,
Reflections:
From last week's lecture, I'd learnt that there must always be a balance in everything we do. During class, we were asked to run through a simple survey ( Your Personal Inventory) to identify and rate the positive and negative qualities we have from 0 (Almost never) to 3 (Almost always). While doing this simple exercise, i personally feel that i had discovered hidden qualities and flaws I never noticed about myself. For instance, i realised that i am almost always an optimistic yet a sentimental person at times. After realising these qualities, i did a short reflection to see if these qualities were true. And to my surprise, they were. For instance, i realised that when someone makes a negative description of someone, i would often think that he/she was indirectly referring to me and i would be very defensive about the statement made.
Thus, i feel that the simple self awareness exercise is, indeed, effective in helping me have an in-depth understanding of myself, especially when I'm feeling frustrated. It has pointed out almost all my good and bad qualities and how i could improve it in an acceptable manner. For instance, in year 2005, i was one of the leaders in my CCA and was in-charged of a camp. During the camp, i was acting alone and i was feeling very lost and frustrated with no one assisting me. When a group of seniors appeared for the camp, i could not think rationally. Instead of being grateful to them for helping out, i was rather rude to them. And i only realised that i was being rude when i got reprimanded by my teacher-in-charge. Through this experience, i feel that it is very important to have self awareness because there can't always be a person to tell you the wrong you had done. Thus, I feel that self awareness is an important aspect of life.
Factors affecting my self-image and self-esteem
In life, i feel that there are many factors affecting my self-image and self-esteem negatively. A simple example would be my outer appearance, i am sometimes very particular about what i wear and how i carry myself in public. Failure is also another factor, as a musician, I'm very mindful of how i play my instrument and if i played poorly in a competition or concert, i would be very angry and disappointed with myself. Another factor that affects my self-image and self esteem negatively includes criticisms made by others or negative feedback by others. To me, there are too many factors affecting my self-image and self-esteem, however, these factors can be dealt with. I should not be too mindful of how i look in public but how i treat people and that beauty is skin-deep. As for failure, i could take it as a learning experience and i would be another step closer to success. Similarly, criticisms by others could be taken positively. It could help me improve as a person and have more self awareness.
5 Years Later..
In 5 years time, i would like people to remember me for being an optimist and a good-natured person. I also want people to remember me as the girl who is always laughing and a person who is open-minded yet sensitive at times because no one is perfect. In five years time, there would be plenty of changes. I would no longer be a student but a working adult and there are many fears like how i am going to adapt to the change in environment and whether people at my workplace are as approachable as those in school. I also fear that there would be changes in my family because my sisters may get married and the family wouldn't be the same as before. I'm afraid of my family's well-being as there is no telling what could happen. However, I'm also confident that i would gradually adapt to life in 5 years time. I could take things step-by-step like voicing out my present fears to my family and friends. In this way, I'm sure i can overcome the obstacles. Future more, i think i would be more independent and mature in 5 years time, unlike the present, because i would have more life experiences along the way.
Signing out,
Shuwen
Reflections:
From last week's lecture, I'd learnt that there must always be a balance in everything we do. During class, we were asked to run through a simple survey ( Your Personal Inventory) to identify and rate the positive and negative qualities we have from 0 (Almost never) to 3 (Almost always). While doing this simple exercise, i personally feel that i had discovered hidden qualities and flaws I never noticed about myself. For instance, i realised that i am almost always an optimistic yet a sentimental person at times. After realising these qualities, i did a short reflection to see if these qualities were true. And to my surprise, they were. For instance, i realised that when someone makes a negative description of someone, i would often think that he/she was indirectly referring to me and i would be very defensive about the statement made.
Thus, i feel that the simple self awareness exercise is, indeed, effective in helping me have an in-depth understanding of myself, especially when I'm feeling frustrated. It has pointed out almost all my good and bad qualities and how i could improve it in an acceptable manner. For instance, in year 2005, i was one of the leaders in my CCA and was in-charged of a camp. During the camp, i was acting alone and i was feeling very lost and frustrated with no one assisting me. When a group of seniors appeared for the camp, i could not think rationally. Instead of being grateful to them for helping out, i was rather rude to them. And i only realised that i was being rude when i got reprimanded by my teacher-in-charge. Through this experience, i feel that it is very important to have self awareness because there can't always be a person to tell you the wrong you had done. Thus, I feel that self awareness is an important aspect of life.
Factors affecting my self-image and self-esteem
In life, i feel that there are many factors affecting my self-image and self-esteem negatively. A simple example would be my outer appearance, i am sometimes very particular about what i wear and how i carry myself in public. Failure is also another factor, as a musician, I'm very mindful of how i play my instrument and if i played poorly in a competition or concert, i would be very angry and disappointed with myself. Another factor that affects my self-image and self esteem negatively includes criticisms made by others or negative feedback by others. To me, there are too many factors affecting my self-image and self-esteem, however, these factors can be dealt with. I should not be too mindful of how i look in public but how i treat people and that beauty is skin-deep. As for failure, i could take it as a learning experience and i would be another step closer to success. Similarly, criticisms by others could be taken positively. It could help me improve as a person and have more self awareness.
5 Years Later..
In 5 years time, i would like people to remember me for being an optimist and a good-natured person. I also want people to remember me as the girl who is always laughing and a person who is open-minded yet sensitive at times because no one is perfect. In five years time, there would be plenty of changes. I would no longer be a student but a working adult and there are many fears like how i am going to adapt to the change in environment and whether people at my workplace are as approachable as those in school. I also fear that there would be changes in my family because my sisters may get married and the family wouldn't be the same as before. I'm afraid of my family's well-being as there is no telling what could happen. However, I'm also confident that i would gradually adapt to life in 5 years time. I could take things step-by-step like voicing out my present fears to my family and friends. In this way, I'm sure i can overcome the obstacles. Future more, i think i would be more independent and mature in 5 years time, unlike the present, because i would have more life experiences along the way.
Signing out,
Shuwen
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