Monday Monday

Cuteness attack!!

This was exactly how I felt this morning.

Before we get to the not as fun business stuff I have a cute puppy story. So every morning Jeff wakes up before me and takes the puppy out. Incidentally he also takes her out during the night because I sleep through her first couple of whines. He's a gem! Ok so he woke up this morning when she was whining to go out. He let's her out of the crate and instead of running to the door like normal, she puts her paws up on the bed and peaks over looking for me. Then she runs to my side at the end of the bed and peaks over the top again. Then she starts whimpering like she wanted me to get up too. It's so adorable. I love having an animal who totally loves me. She's nice and bonded to us which is my fave. I know I said one story but here's one mroe that one reminded me of. I go to Salt Lake for work every other Tuesday and don't get back until late. Of course I miss my puppy all day too and it's so comforting when I come home and her little tail is wagging a mile a minute because she's so excited I'm home. I guess this last time I was gone and Jeff was home with her, she walked around the house like she was looking for something. Jeff realized it was me she was looking for when she put her paws up on the bed and peaked over at my side. How flattering is that?! I sure love puppyville.

Alright, so let's get on to the To Do list from the weekend. Shall we see an update?

1. Sew up clothes DONE!


2. Sew pillow inserts (I started this one but then I realized I made them too small. Ugh. So since they're inserts I'm going to make a couple little tube type inserts to fill in the edges. Or maybe I'll just make them too small and deal with it. we'll see what happens but I really want to have at least a couple finished up this week)

3. Dishes (Jeff did about half the dishes so the rest are getting done today)

4. Figure out how to make the sink not stink DONE! I googled this one and was all prepared to clean out the P trap under the sink when Jeff discovered it was just a pot that stank. So that's taken care of

5.Declutter media (Nothing happened on this one, but I did discuss it with Jeff and told him I want to steal Kami's idea with the DVDs in envelopes.)

6. Bake pineapple tarts DONE! But not that great sadly. They really needed a little tartness. I'm really looking for something superb to bake and things are just coming up subpar sadly.

So today is another floor and surface clean day on apartment therapy. I'm almost disappointed too because it's the last week. :( I'm going to have to get back on Fly lady so someone's always telling me what to clean. For today's surface clean I'm going back to the kitchen. I've got to get the second half of the word crossed out on my To Do list. I actually cleaned a lot of the surfaces in there yesterday too so I'll work on decluttering and the floors too. I need to vacuum this place like no one's business. So what is everyone else up to? Is anyone else doing the home cure? How's it gone for you so far?

Easy Like Sunday Morning

Today feels like Sunday, I'm not sure why, it just does. And I'm sure glad it's not because not only do I get a Sunday today, but I'll get one tomorrow too! So this is going to be another short post because I was dumb and read Kami's blog. Which reminded me how many things I still meant to do for my Apartment Therapy stuff. I'm totally stealing the idea of putting the movies in the sleeves. We've already done that with some movies but I actually have a DVD holder box thingy that would be perfect for it and I'm sure all of our DVDs would fit! The closest I got to organizing media this week is unpacking my box full of media that was sitting around forever. It was the first box I moved up here and the last to get unpacked. Oops. I mean to organize the bookshelves and cupboard better too so things don't look quite so cluttered up in here. I haven't done things on the day they were mentioned in most cases but I have mostly done everything. I still need to fix something. I have a couple of things I wanted to sew up so I might do that today. PLUS I've started making boob pillows for people who had to have mastectomies due to breast cancer so I need to sew up a bunch of inserts for those. Quick and easy peasy like. And our kitchen stinks because there are dishes to do and no garbage disposal. I suppose I should get on that as well. Yikes, here I was chillin', watching football and now I realize how much I'm not doing. OH and I'm going to bake a treat today too. Ok so enough chatting about it. Lemme list so I can come back and cross off and feel all cool.

1. Sew up clothes
2. Sew pillow inserts
3. Dishes
4. Figure out how to make the sink not stink
5.Declutter media
6, Bake pineapple tarts

But before I go, I found out that wedding pics are ready so I will be getting those soon. Hooray! Also, my puppy rocks. I need to get some good pictures of her playing in the snow. She loves it and just takes off running everywhere like a nutcase. Then it clings to her scruffy hair so her face and paws are covered in white. I will be such an annoying mom someday. All bragging about my kids. Fair warning.

Back to Business

Holy...crap. This year has been INSANE! I have half blog posts all over the place because I get started and there's just so much to tell that I get sick of it and stop. Evyerthing has changed since May. It's so bizarre to think that things were more and more of the same and in less than half a year, it's all flipped around. I am no longer the single girl living in SLC. Nope. I'm the married girl living in Logan with a single kidney. I'll have to finish my half written post about the surgery later because it has a ton of detail. But here I am feeling just like normal except for the scar through my belly button and the two tiny scars on my hips. Oh and the fact that doing situps or other strenuous exercise with my abs is a little more difficult still. My dad is doing really well too. He's working and getting out and about. His blood levels keep normalizing and he's to the point where they're going to start the chemo back up. He's been off it and in remission for several months because of his surgeries but since multiply myeloma has no cure, they want to be absolutely sure it doesn't come back. This means chemo indefinitely. My fingers are still crossed that those modern medicition miracle workers come up with a cureposte haste. Anyway, moving on...

The next little piece of news is that I am married! Jeff and I got engaged in August and married the 30th of September. Then I moved to Logan since this is where he's going to school. Yeah I know we were not engaged very long which made the process stressful, but strangely everything ended up falling into place. We had a great wedding, we ended up with someone to take over the lease on my apartment, and I've been able to keep my job working from here until the end of the year. It's just crazy to look back and think about how fast it all happened.

Oh yeah! And we got a PUPPY!!! Oh my gosh she's so damn cute. I could seriously stare at her all the time. Even when she's being crazy and naughty she's adorable. But all the Dog Whisperer shows I've watched have been coming in handy. I'm certainly not the greatest pack leader yet but I have confidence I'll get there. I'll post some pictures a little later but any of my FB friends have seen plenty. I'm kind of obssessed. she's the bomb.

This is just the quickest summary but I'm sure I'll be putting some more details later. Right now I have other things on my mind. Namely the Apartment Therapy 20/20 cure I did last hear. 20 tasks in 20 days to whip your place into shape. I can't tell you how badly our place needs to be whipped. I did the bathroom yesterday and now I just want to hang out in it all the time. Nowhere else around here is even close to sorted out. I feel a little like a hoarder since I'm having to walk through paths. So I have to get all homemakery and make my home. today's task is the living room. Where I have a couple of boxes of miscellaneous crap which is the worst to go through. Oh well, gotta just get through it. Sort It Out Shanno. Like seriously. It's a tad redonk and I've had it!

Let me warn you now. The marriage stuff and the puppy stuff is all so new that I'll probably be annoying with it for a bit. So sorry but you can just skip those posts. Well here we go..I'm officially BACK!

Getting Closer

Just today my anxiety level has risen a tad. It's odd to think about being this close to the procedure. So of course, being the weirdo I am, I decided to freak myself out a little by looking up pictures online. Don't get me wrong, I'm not squeamish, however, once you start imagining this stuff done to you, it gets a little more squeamy. Just to help you out, here are some cool diagrams I found to describe what's going to happen. Don't worry no real pictures although those are out there. I almost thought it looked weirder seeing all the instruments in little tiny holes than the older pictures where they cut the whole side open. I'll explain as we go.

Ok so this is the closest thing to what I'm going to look like that I could find. Although I will be minus the killer muscular physique. Basically you have the little bitty slits on the left where they put in all the laproscopic doodads like the camera, the scalpel, etc. Then there's this incision a few inches long right around the belly button. The good part about this is that a lot of it will get sewn back into the belly button and I'll have minimal scarring there. Anyway, it's called a hand assisted laproscopic nephrectomy which means the doodads do their job to get everything disconnected inside me and the surgeon puts a hand in the longer incision to help the kidney out.

In the olden days, (a whole like 10 years ago) they would make a huge incision in the donor's side from the stomach around to the back. This helped them get to the kidney and pull it out without damaging the organ. Seeing as how it needs to be in pretty good shape leaving the body, it makes sense. But that was longer recovery time, more risk of infection, and more PAIN! All I can say is thank heavens for technology. Laproscopy is about the best invention I can think of as of late.

Now these are diagrams of what's going to happen on my dad's end. He gets a half moon shaped incision on his side and then in goes the kidney. The other two stick around and continue not working. The new guy hangs out on his own closer to the front of the body and starts kicking butt and taking names. Oooo! He can make his own show "Sister Kidneys"! I think I'm on to something there....

Have I mentioned lately how much this stuff blows my mind? I mean seriously! And I was reading articles that there is a way of doing the entire thing through one hole in the belly button. Craaaazy!!

I'm kind of glad I looked at pictures so I have an idea of what's going to happen. I was actually surprised because it seems like there are several variations. In many cases, the longer incision was below the bikini line and they pulled the kidney all the way down there. Some people have 2, 3, 4, 5 or even 6 tiny slits for doodads. (I should have 2-3 according to my doc) Just goes to show there's more than one way to -ectomy a neph. A little medical terminology humor there for ya. ;)

It still does not give me the greatest idea of what to expect with the surgery aspect of things. So at night my brain takes over and starts imagining all kinds of weirdness. I guess it's a good thing we're so close to the big day. Before long there will be no imagination needed!

My technologically advanced way of communicating with the surgeons while I'm knocked out.
"This side please"

Help for the sistah!

Kami needs our help! (If you're wondering who this Kami chick is, just read like every other post. She's the awesomest chick ever) She's entered a contest to get a room makeover and desperately needs it. Kami knows I'm not trying to offend. She just has a tiny space that could use another set of eyes for some organization. AND this chickadee has got great taste so she's willing to put her house in someone else's hands. Check out Kami's post about it here and then PLEASE go to vote for her here. Help a sistah out pretty please!

Holding My Breath and Counting Down

Big News! The surgery is back on! I was reeeeally hoping to have had it and be recovered by now, but there were minor complications. Here's a breakdown of the whole ordeal to date (for anyone out o' the loop):

• We found out my dad had multiple myeloma and amyloids after he went to the doctor thinking he might have a kidney infection.
• Next there was much unpleasantness involving chemo, dialysis & a bone marrow transplant.
• We waited for his kidney functions to bounce back...they didn't.
• He had a fistula implanted in his arm and has continued dialysis 3 days a week for around 4 hours a pop.
• The doctors said, the kidneys aren't coming back but that the cancer was in remission and he could be a part of the kidney transplant program.
• Cheering all around.
• I decided to see if I was a match after realizing I'm the only immediate family member with the same blood type.
• I was.
• I researched to find out more about what a kidney donor could expect and I found out that while it's majory surgery, not without its risks, it is a lot less scary than I originally thought.
• I then realized I wanted my dad to live a better life and that I was willing to give a up a kidney to keep him around. (and feeling less ill)
• Testing was draaaaaaagged out until we finally got a new coordinator
• Holy cow surgery scheduled for next month! (This was in October)
• 1 week before surgery, "oh by the by, we found a brain tumor." 2 days before the surgery, "Sorry, no surgery."
• Tears, grumbles, and hissy fits all around (ok maybe I was the main hissy fitter)
• Brain surgery - the tumor is benign (oh yeah and it's been there awhile. Just some nice info to have)
• "One month of recovery and you can reschedule"
• One month later..."one more month and you can reschedule"
• A second month later...Come on!! How long does it take to get some friggin paperwork?!

I spoke with our coordinator last week and she mentioned she was able to get the paperwork they were waiting for. I asked her to find out how quickly we could reschedule. That brings us to Monday of this week when she said "Looks like we can get you in on the 9th". I'll give you a second to do the math..
...
...Pencils down please.

Yes! That is exactly 2 weeks. Holy whoa. We both really want to be functional by our birthdays (end of May) and this would be cutting it a liiiittle close. So I called him to see what he thought of that date. There was an unmistakable enthusiasm you would likely only notice if you knew him and recognized it's not his normal tone. It's a quiet, understated but powerful spark that touched my heart. You see, I'd been thinking that maybe we should wait until after birthday month so we can be sure we'll have enough oomph to celebrate. Duh Shannon. I haven't been doing dialysis and feeling miserable, depressed, and sick daily for roughly 2 and a half years now. That spark of hope in his words spoken without so much as a breath after I uttered the date, "Yeah! That will give me enough time to get coverage at work. Tell her that works"...I can't even relay it in type. I guess you had to be there. Point being, I remembered what it was all about. Sure it's been slower than thought and we've had our anticipation shattered once already. It's all been worth it to have the chance to get him well faster. The faster the better. I realize now it wouldn't matter if I had to walk a little slower or take it a little easier on my birthday. I'd have his life as my celebration and nothing beats that.

A pat on the back and a rant

Part 1. Pat

Let me introduce you to my new friend.

This, is my new rechargeable battery thingymagig complete with 4 batteries. Ok so it came with 4 and now two are in my camera. My battery chugging camera can now be satiated for a fraction of the cost it was taking before. They last a comparable amount of time to the middle of the line batteries I bought previously, only I won't have to keep spending an arm and a leg to get them. AND I'll actually be able to post pictures faster. Woo hoo! That is if I can get my computer to stop wiggin' out. But that's a story for another day. Are you turning green with jealousy over how green with earth friendliness I've just become? No? Oh, you're green with how sick my lame pun made you. Sorry. Moving on.

In no uncertain terms, I was itching to shop yesterday. It was a beautiful day outside and I wanted to drive! To a store that is. My mind debate went as follows:

I should hunt for second hand furniture at the DI. I really need a new dresser so I could fix one up...or maybe I could find some used filing cabinets for my planned craft room/office. I really need one...Oh I know! It would be nice and cheap to just grab some finishing touches for a few projects I've had in the works. I know I really shouldn't spend any money at all seeing as how I'm super broke from my dedication to debt dissipation, but it's just the perfect day for shopping.

So I headed home with thoughts of dollar signs swimming in my head. I was even proud of myself for keeping my apartment a couple of steps shy of CHAOS. (Curious what that is? see here) I totally deserve a treat. Only when I got home, I actually opened my eyes and was confronted with the Half-Finished-Project Villians. These guys hit me with a...



Whamo!

1.

Kerplow!

2.



Blamoooh now that's just gross

3.



And the Double Whammy:



4.a



4.b



Aaaand just for good measure, A little POW! Right in the kisser!

5.

Hoooboy...Let's take inventory shall we?

1. The ever so classic Breakfast at Tiffany's poster. Yes I'm pretty sure Audrey would say "Whamo" and smack me in the face when she found out that poster has been hanging on my bedroom wall courtesy of various colored thumbtacks. I call it dorm room chic.

2. This is exactly what it looks like. A wadded up sheet. Lemme 'splain. I have still only made it about halfway through the process of making a bed skirt. I made the decision to use a sheet as the base for the ruffle instead of worrying about cutting and sewing a piece of fabric big enough. But in my idiocy, I bought a fitted sheet. So I've been hemming and hawing and trying to make this bad boy flat. It just may work, but it will take a certain amount of forethought. Which I'm short on at the moment.

3. This, folks, is what I type on daily at work. Notice how the tops of the keys are all nice and tidy? That's because I clean this thing weekly with Clorox wipes. Problem being, the keys have sides, spaces, and other hard to reach nooks and crannies. Places for dust to marinate in spilled soda and whatever other goodies have been dropped down there by the previous keyboard users. Lovely thought isn't it? Oh sure I use canned air when I have it, but this stuff ain't going nowhere.

4. This is my porch. Usually I neaten things up before winter hits, but this year was a no go. Yes, I look like a Beverly Hillbilly, sans the Beverly. Yes that is a polyurethane hardened paintbrush in a cup. Yes that is a tarp covered in flakes of paint from various bedroom projects last year. Of course, those are DEAD plants hanging in cheap receptacles. Doesn't everybody keep their plants green for the majority of the summer only to mess up for a week and give up? No, I don't believe that sliding glass door has been washed. Ever.

5. And the new bane of my existence, the art I'm trying to do for my bedroom wall. Did I mention this has been a project for a good 4 or 5 months now? And bores me to paper pieces just by thinking about it?

With this crazy gang lurking in every corner of my apartment, I knew I had enough to keep me busy without spending money. I didn't get it all done, but I feel good about what transpired.

Since it was a beautiful day, I winterized my porch. I realize winter is almost over, but it's too early to fill the pots and get everything set up the way I like. So this will have to do. Oh and I even cleaned the windows and remembered why I never clean them. It's a pain.



TADA!

Next up was the keyboard since it had to go back to work with me the next day. I took a good chunk of the evening washing all the keys. But look! I even remembered to take a picture of the keyboard before I pulled the keys off so I would remember where to put them later.



oooo Shiny! And no Lamisil fungus or Mucinex mucus monsters hiding in the spaces. What? That's what all that grossness reminded me of.



Last, since I was catching up on some movies I needed to watch, I tackled the art board. I don't have a finished picture because I didn't finish it. But I made noticeable progress and I felt good at that point. Good and tired that is!

Part 2. Rant

I HATE car shops. Not dealerships, but the places you take your car to get it fixed. (I have no experience with dealerships to date) It doesn't matter where it is. They ALL suck.

You go to a small place and you risk getting a guy who has no clue what he's doing and decides to root around under the hood and put everything in backwards. But not hook it up. Oh and charge you the Kelly Blue Book Value of the car. 

You go to a big, name brand chain where they promise warranties, fast service, gumdrops, and rainbows. Someone you can be sure will exist in the next week. Of course those folks have inflated their prices to the retail price of the car. They say phrases like "I'm surprised you even made it in here! Your car needs A, B, C, D and hell, why not, 3 of E. Now or you WILL die. The second you drive away." Car apocalypse anyone? 

They're all crap. None of them can be trusted and you might as well sign away your first born child now. It will hurt more if you wait.

Just cross your fingers that the lameness that encompasses my car issues will get sorted out without me having to mortgage my future dream home. And by "sorted out" I don't mean my car dying all together.

On a good note, I have the best man ever. He gets nice and riled up by the injustice the car world has put me through and has vowed to help me not get ripped off. Hooray for light at the end of the tunnel. Let's just hope it's not the train!

A bowl full of lemons.: Silhouette GIVEAWAY!!!!

A bowl full of lemons.: Silhouette GIVEAWAY!!!!

Another Try!

Anyone who knows me knows I want so very badly to own a Silhouette machine. However, you also know that I am working my tail off to get out of debt and that involves sacrifice. A horrible sacrifice that includes NOT buying a Silhouette. So until I've been a good enough girl to get one for Christmas or have saved up, I am entering as many giveaways as humanly possible. You can get in on the giveaway action too. Check this out!

Remodelaholic's giveaway
Life in the fun lane's giveaway
Decor Chick's giveaway
The Organizing Junkie's giveaway

Inspirations!

First off, damn you Kami! My blog stalking has about doubled recently thanks to Kami and all the blogs she gets me hooked on. My most recent fave is I Heart Organizing. It's one of those blogs that gets my blood pumping for some good ol' fashioned organization. I feel like one of those people who is never organized. (didja catch that Kami? ha ha) I'm crappy at it, seriously. In my effort this year to be more put together I'm doing little things here and there to get organized. One of them is the household binder project on aforementioned blog. And guess what?! They're giving away a super cool label maker. So go enter to win one and then give it to me when you do. Thanks!  Seeing someone else's great ideas really helps shake me out of my slump and inspires me to get stuff organized!

Speaking of organization, I just happen to have a crappy picture of my latest project. I used a couple of blog posts (here) I found just doing a google search and made can organizers! I'm still going to paint them so they're not quite so ugly, but I used a nice sturdy cardboard box from my parents' new TV and some hot glue. I sure do love hot glue. Once I got the hang of how to do the first one, the second one took no time at all. I think I'm going to do one more for my smaller cans. I tell you what though, because they're fully customized, these dudes have at least doubled the can space I have in my tiny, shallow shelved, narrow pantry.

Now, what could be more inspiring that an awesome deal?! I admit I've slowed down a tad on finding great shopping deals since my gift cards have been spent, but my friend/coworker B has picked up the slack! Check out this story she shared with me. I had to hijack it and share because this is just the kind of awesomeness that gets me going.

B and her husband went to Kohls to get a new set of pots and pans. They found a set they liked that was originally $199.00. Luckily, it was on sale for HALF PRICE! I mean, come on! It gets even better though. She had $50 in Kohls cash racked up that brought her total to $53.29. Add onto that the $20 in gift cards she had and the total she paid out of pocket was only $33.29. I could end there and it would rock, but what's that I see? Is that a cherry on top? Why yes it is and in the form of a $20 rebate. Bringing the grand out of pocket total for a $200 cookware set to $13.29. uh yeah. Freaking...A...Awesome. Now THAT is what I'm talkin' about!

*sidenote* B is the "kind and generous coworker" mentioned here. And her amazing savings trickled down to me too! She gave me another $10 Kohls Cash to use next week and I couldn't be more thrilled. SHOPPING!!!

What's the Dealio yo? I'll SHOW you the Dealio yo!

Ok so I have to take a moment and bask in my money saving glory. As I mentioned in my last post about money, I'm really trying to save and get out of debt. I happen to have a slight addiction to shopping though. Not so much shopping for designer things or big ticket items, but the smaller stuff really kills the budget. Too much on groceries due to spontaneous purchases, too much on clothes because of a sale, etc. etc. So I've been on the lookout for the greatest deals that will stay within my scarily tight budget and still make me feel like I'm not missing out. It helps when bill time comes around and I realize 99% of the money I make goes to other people with nothing for me to show for it.

I've tried to be patient when I get a gift card and only spend it when I think I can get a super terrific deal. Sadly, at this point, I've pretty much used them all. But I feel like I've gotten far more bargain hunting for far less than I do when I'm winging it. So it's a win-win. Check out these deals!

Express-I had a really great plan with this one. But I got just the tiniest bit carried away. If all had gone to plan, I would have gotten $150 worth of clothes for $25. I needed work pants but every time I go they don't have any my size. Come to find out this last visit, they don't really stock my size so I'll have to get them from the site. Boo! However, since spring is around the corner I decided I would feel better about spending the gift card if I got myself a work skirt instead. They were also having a sale on shorts with buy one, get one 50% off. Last they had a super cute skirt that I just really wanted. It's springy and colorful and very different from what I normally get. Here's how that all added up. *Because of the coupon I had, none of the Express clothes could be clearance. It blew my mind to shop in the regular priced section!

Full Price:
Work skirt-$59.90
Fun skirt-$34.90
Shorts-$44.90
Other shorts-$44.90
Total $184.60 ouch!

The savings:
No $200 for 4 things for me! I had coupon to save $50 on a $150 purchase, one of the pairs of shorts was half off from the sale, I had $49.81 on a mall gift card from Christmas, and $25 on an Express gift card for Christmas.
Grand Total: $45.02 Not nearly so shabby.

Still, that is more than I had planned on spending and definitely counts as my big splurge. But I reigned it in for this next one.

Victoria's Secret- Ok I still feel a little ashamed about this one. I got my sister a bra for Christmas of 2009 that didn't fit her quite right. So she gave it back to me to return which I did...a year later. oops. So I ended up with a merchandise credit. I held onto that for a bit and when I had a couple of good coupons, I pounced.

Full Price:
bra-$26.50
underwear-$11.50
hip hugger underwear-$11.50
Total $49.50

The savings: Can I just mention how much I love getting good quality, cute stuff guilt free?! I had a coupon for $10 off any bra, the merchandise credit for $29.80, and a coupon for a free pair of the incredible hiphugger underwear.
Grand Total: $0.12

Yes, you read that right. I had to dig around in my purse to find the change graveyard for this one. How awesome is that?! Plus, now is their secret reward promotion. It's a card that could be worth up to $500, but at minimum is $10. If you spend a certain amount this month, you get one that you can come back and use next month. You don't find out how much is on it until you buy something, but who cares?! A minimum of $10 means I can at least go get another cute pair of underwear for free. Hell to the yes folks...hell to the yes.

And last is a quickie that I just came across today. I signed up for the Living Social emails. They send out a deal a day local to your area. I haven't been very interested in most of them, but today they had a 2 movie tickets for $9 promotion. That's like paying matinee price or less for a full priced ticket! I like to find deals on things the BF and I can do to stay entertained so I went ahead and got that too. My 12 cents is telling me it's all good, but my $45 is tsk tsking me. Oh well, not every deal can be a dollar or less.

A Mark, a Yen, a Buck, or a Pound

A pound in my face that is. Yes folks, I'm talking about money. Money money money blech. Seriously, though, it's the biggie on my mind this year. I really want to be a more "put together" person. The financial aspect is really taking deflating my hopes for that goal though.

Money's on my mind all the time, not just this year. The desire for it, ideas for what to do with it, the realization I don't have it. I am coming up on 30 before long and truthfully I have nothing to show for it. I have a decent paying job (I would love to make more but I'm not out hocking Rolox watches in the seedy underbelly of Sugarhouse either). I don't have a mortgage or a car payment. I own designer nothing. Clearance clothes from Express are a classy treat for me. Zero big ticket items in my house. My TV could double for a coffee table and HD? Ha, funny joke. My laptop is a hand-me-down from my mom and let's just say it must be going through menopause or something. I swear the thing is moodier than a Nirvana song. In fact, most things I own are hand-me-downs.

I would be remiss if I didn't pause here to say how much I do appreciate the kindness of others in my life. There is nothing wrong with hand-me-downs and they have all played a role in helping me make it on my own. I belive they have their time and place though. ALSO I am more appreciative than I let on about how I even exist on my own. I don't want for food, water, or heat and I have been through times where I couldn't say that. So I do appreciate what I've been blessed with and I know that I am probably better off than I deserve.

At times I'm amazed at how far in debt people can actually get themselves. I mean how is it even possible? I have a small fraction of the debt I know many people have and I feel like any more and I'd be on the street. It absolutely blows my mind when I listen to Dave Ramsey and someone calls in saying they're $80k in debt, not including the house. On what? Even with a high interest rate, how did they get approved for any kind of loan or credit?! Yeesh!

But I digress...I decided around September of last year that I was just sick and tired of it all. I feel 100% dependent on my job because I live paycheck to paycheck. Not saying I'd walk out tomorrow, but wouldn't it be cool if I could? Holy freedom! What would it be like to drive a car I don't have to explain to people when they see it? What would it be like to *gasp* OWN a home? Even just to have the option to own something? I get heart palpitations just considering that possibility.

I made lame mistakes in my youth. Not only did I do that, but I clearly didn't learn from them because I continue paying for them. I used my depression over the situation as an excuse to dig myself deeper. So no more! NO. MORE! I've had enough already. I'm allowing myself to be obsessed. Anyone who knows me knows that I hate when people fling around the term OCD. I'm not going OCD (heaven knows I am way to scatterbrained to go that far), but I'm definitely getting obsessive. By the end of the year I demand to be out of debt except for one thing that I know will take longer no matter what. But other than that, a good girl I will be.

So I apologize in advance when you catch me staring at Mint.com slackjawed and eyes glazed like doughnuts. I apologize for having absolutely no fun stories about trips, dinners, or shopping excursions and annoying you with daily exclamations of "I'm going to be practically out of debt this year!" I have to keep my eye on the prize and constantly remind myself how worth it this goal is or I will just let myself down again. Also, please refrain from thinking I'm a loser when I can't take the fun weekend out of towner or when I just order an appetizer at dinner because I have a half off coupon. A girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do. And this girl's Got To Do IT!

On a happier note, I've noticed that the more I deny myself spending money on fun things, the more opportunities fall into my lap to still get stuff. Coupons, sales, and gift cards (especially when combined) are my friends. One example, which I know I've shared with many already, is my most recent trips to Kohls. I had returned a skirt there which they would not give me cash for because I bought it with a Visa gift card. So I had a merchandise credit for about $26.00. I hung onto it thinking I would use it the next time I thought I was going to burst from wanting so badly to shop. Along comes my sweet mom with a $10 off coupon that she wasn't going to use. She offered it to me and I said SURE! I took those puppies to the store in Logan when we were bored one weekend and got two shirts on clearance plus a smoke box for the BBQ. The clearance was another 25% off so I got the whole shebang for $20. I came into work and shared my bargain hunting experience only to have my kind and generous coworker tell me that she had a $10 Kohl's cash coupon that she wasn't going to be using and would I like it? Shiz yes! So I took that puppy over on my lunch break and got two more shirts paying just over a dollar out of pocket for tax. Having no money for shopping I still managed to get 4 shirts AND the smoker box for about $1. Patience combined with my coupon/gift card hoarding seems to be paying off. Hopefully it keeps up. It's so much easier to get a little reward for my hard work.

*On a side note* My dad had his brain surgery and is doing really well. It's very encouraging. So hopefully, if all continues to go well, kidney surgery will be on this spring!

Bob Loblaw

Book slam...turn
Do you like crafts?

Book slam...turn
Are you looking for kidney updates?

Book slam...turn
Well look no further. No seriously, don't look any further in this post because I've got none of the above today. I'm just in that getting-stuffs-off-my-chest kinda way today. *Extra points if you've caught the above TV reference from the best show ever*

I have to say that I know one of the wisest, most insightful people ever. Do you want to know her too? You can! Her blog To the University is totally great. Who is this mystery woman? Well I only talk about her like every five minutes, but it's Kami. Just to give a little background, Kami is an LCSW. She's perfect for that line of work as well. Kami doesn't BS. She doesn't sugar coat or make excuses for people. She doesn't even let herself off the hook which many of us do. However, she doesn't just complain and leave it at that. Oh no! Kami looks for the reasons why people do what they do. She tries to understand them and then turns the mirror on herself. Do I do the same thing? How can I be a better person after learning from other's actions? This is the message I get from her "venting". There are many times that I wish I had that reaction whenever I see something that frustrates me or when I make stupid choices. I'm too quick to be defensive or angry. I could blame it on role models growing up, but guess what. I'm an adult now. I'm the role model. So do I defend my negative actions and blame someone else? Not a good plan. I believe that the only way to be who you want is to expose your imperfections. You fess up to them and don't worry about making excuses for them. You polish those areas and when you slip up you apologize to anyone you may have hurt and keep going. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that's what I do, but that's what I believe I need to do. Reading Kami's University blog, which is chock full of quotes from the wisest people on earth, helps remind me to look in that ugly ol mirror and humble myself. So yay for Kami. Follow her blog and you'll probably learn a thing or two about people and/or yourself.

*this is not a solicited endorsement for KamiCo. I just really like her blog that much.

So on to my other thought. I read a blog today where a girl who had gone to BYU was talking about how she and her husband met. I love a good love story and it makes me happy to read about people meeting eachother and being able to find a lifelong companion. However, she made a comment in it about meeting this guy and thinking at first that he seemed the UVSC type. At first I was way annoyed. "Damn zoobies are so judgemental! And people wonder why I hate BYU so much...grumble grumble..." That was my thought process. *I do have to mention that the blogger admitted this view was naive and that she was young at the time. So really it's not her, personally, that I had any issues with*

Then I started to analyze myself. Honestly, it makes me sad. I grew up in the south as a Mormon. I grew up in branches (not even wards) where we drove an hour to go to church for 3 hours then drive back an hour. Where I lived, we were THRILLED to see someone come to church in pants, jeans, drunk, whatever. They were there! They were looking and our arms were open to them. We went to Denny's for lunch during conference. I mean we live an hour away, there was no time to go home and eat. Most of the members were there with us. We had Coke at church activites. People like Coke. Bring Coke, the people will come and get the message you're trying to give. None of these things was looked down on.

I remember when we evacuated from Hurricane Andrew and lived for a week or so in a Mormon church. Were there just Mormons there? No. Did people divide into groups based on their religion? No. The local grocery store threw open their doors and poured food and toiletries on us. The members of the community from all relgions held tarps up to cook breakfast outside on the grill for everyone there. It was peace on earth in my little 8 year old eyes and this was the way life was supposed to be. The church was magical to me growing up. I felt a connection with the kindest most loving people I had ever met and I defended that belief system with all of my heart. When I found out we were moving to Utah I was THRILLED!! Now I'd be totally surrounded with these people. No more feeling like an outcast at school.

Things were not what I expected when I moved here. I found out that Mormons are not the same everywhere. I learned that the people I had always frowned upon for being so judgemental of others (those who hated me because I was different) were now my neighbors. I think that this stark contrast between how I viewed the church's objectives and how the members in Zion treated others is what makes me react so quickly whenever I see Mormons being snotty. I want to shake them by the shoulders and say, this is not what it's all about. I want so badly for the Mormons I know in Utah to be like my southern Mormons. Can't we all just get along?

People are naturally drawn to those with things in common. Especially when you're talking about lifelong companionship, you want to be with someone who shares your beliefs. BUT Just because someone else doesn't share your beliefs, that doesn't make them lower than you. Just different. Which is ok. You can still love them. You don't need to exclude people who are not like you. Maybe you could learn something new from them and enrich your own life.

I understand that it is different for large communities of one type of belief. The same things I complain about with the "Utah Mormons" happen all over the world with every single belief system and religion. This is not exclusive to any one population. Mass populations change their behavior. The more I think about it, the more I realize that my feelings are less that I hate BYU and more that I hate exclusivity.

I have had so many ups and downs in my life that I feel so fortunate to be in a comfortable place. Some of the people who have taught me the most are those who would be looked down on in my community. That hurts my heart because they deserve all the love I can give them. My plan is to keep getting inspiration from good people, like Kami and my BF, and just do whatever I can to give back the kindness that has been shown to me in my life. And remember, if your power goes out, I've got a couch!! And being a southern raised girl, you know I will NOT let you go hungry. Ever.

Yeesh

The title pretty much expresses my feelings at the moment. My poor father cannot seem to catch a break. I just don't know how he deals with everything without falling to pieces. Maybe part of it is that he's a guy and inherently less emotionally strung out. Maybe it's his nursing that helps him see the medical and logical side to his situation. Or hell, maybe he's falling apart and is waaaay better at hiding it than I would be. I have no clue. But as you can probably guess at this point, he's had his follow up appointment with the brain doctor.

It's not the update we were hoping for, but I guess any update is better than no update. The medication he was taking to try to shrink the brain tumor has done nothing. zip, zero, nada. He could keep trying different dosages, but something should have happened at this point. First I'll go all silver lining here and say at least they didn't say the tumor is bigger. That I am grateful for, but the medication did NOTHING. That is, nothing but make him feel sick. Sicker I mean. Ugh. So it's on to surgery. He's scheduled to have the tumor removed on February 8th. If all goes well, we'll be able to start talking about rescheduling kidney surgery about a month after that.

Now personally, when I heard the news, some choice words flew out of my mouth. Luckily I was alone. Anyone with me probably would have been scarred for life. Later that night my parents dropped by my place for a minute. I asked him how he was doing with the news and he just shrugged in a "whatcha gonna do" kind of way. It's true that you do what you can and hope for the best. But how he can keep that point of view being the one who's going through the experience amazes me. The man's an inspiration. All the more reason to do anything to keep him around!

When it rains...

It's official, the technology gods are against me. first the camera. After that my internet didn't feel like connecting. So I gave it a little nap, did some grocery shopping and tried to start from scratch. Unfortunately my computer was possessed and I had to restart it about 30 times. THEN when I open Iphoto it asks me if I want that to be my default when I plug in my camera (not like it even works). I say sure and it says cool dude, now you can't see any of your pictures. wha?! Apparently choosing "ok" has now changed the settings of my Iphoto and it isn't showing any pictures.

I was fully planning a post to show the fun trays I made for Christmas but it just doesn't seem to be my night. I hate to disappoint but sometimes you just know when to cut bait, make a nice cup of tea and pack it in. I hope everyone's night went better than mine!

Cross your fingers

Ok ok so I totally read Kami's post and wanted to enter too. But if both of us enter, more chances to win right?! Someday I will have a Sillhouette SD. Someday...
You can enter too at Craftaholics but only if you promist to share if you win. ;) http://tinyurl.com/6joxqun

Funny Stuffs

*Disclaimer* This post contains a lot of ass. Don't say I didn't warn you!

I have a file on my computer at work that I call For a Smile. The purpose behind this little Word Doc is to remember some of the funny things I come across in at work. As I was adding something else today I thought, I should share some of this. It's this sort of thing that keeps me sane day to day so hopefully you get a kick out of it too. 

The following funnies have been genericized because I just couldn't make it in jail.

From the mouths of clients:

Client:How are you today?
Me: I'm doing well, how are you?
Client: I can't complain.
Me: Well that's good to hear.
Client: Because if I do, they beat me.

Client: I think this card was never activated
Me: You’re right, it wasn’t.
Client: The dumb shit threw it away.
Me:[hearty laughing]
Client: Did I say that out loud?
Me: Nope, I didn’t hear a thing.


Client: We have this system that I think is….ok no profanity. Think of a 4 letter word that rhymes with luck. This call is being monitored for quality purposes right? I meant shoot. I don’t care about this guy or his card. If you were out here, we’d go for a brewski.
Me: [tears rolling down face and wheezing with laughter]

Internal goodness:

Internal instant message forwarded from a coworker:
"Can you communicate the new assword to all clients?"

And to round it all off, my favorite:

From my own task list. In fairness, this is the cutoff version you see before you open up the full task

Christmas Follow Up 1

I'm numbering these posts because I honestly didn't count how many projects I did and I'm curious to see. Of course this blog won't include all the crochet projects because those bad boys go to the crochet blog. Since my camera is still being funky, I'm going to post the projects whose pictures I downloaded pre-funk.


I was looking at the blog UCreate which is one of those where they post crafts other people have done and then you can go to their site for the tutorial. While I was there, I saw this cuteness. Unfortunately, I'm painfully short on wood and all tools meant to create with wood. Sure I could go buy these things, but I was trying to SAVE money this year so that sorta defeats the purpose. What I'm left to do in those cases is work with what I've got. In this case, it happened to be paper. A couple of months ago I looked up how to make a paper origami box so I could use it as a gift box for a present for Jeff's niece.




Don't ask why it says Rob and Shannon. If you're Jeff's family, though, you already know.




 

See, told you so! Not too shabby eh?

I thought paper boxes would work just great. Because of the laws of physics, though, I knew I'd have to make a stand. (Thanks a lot Newton! Couldn't you keep that gravity junk to yourself?)  Too bad I'm lazy. I bet it would have been even better with a well drawn out plan to start, but here's what I came up with.

I got a simple cheap wood board at JoAnn's I think. It was just a couple of dollars. Then I covered it in a thin layer of batting and white muslin. I went so far as to iron teh fabric even. That's what you get when I'm makng presents people, detail. I stapeled all of that to the back of the board but this of course left staples and wood visible.

I did mention that I get a little paranoid about details when I'm making presents right? I had to cover that up so I cut out a piece of posterboard that I had laying around and hot glued it to the back.

Apparently I took approximately 10 pictures of the process of stapling fabric to a board but completely neglected to take pictures of the rest of the process. After the board was ready I made three different sizes of paper boxes using the most basic form of origami known to man. I thought blue would look nice and wintery so I grabbed a few sheets of paper I already had that I thought might coordinate. The middle box got a few buttons hot glued on. The top box got cut outs of a face. I forgot that the shadowbox snowman only had a nose, but adding the face and arms made mine a little more whimiscal I think. Anyway, enough excuses, after that I went outside and found a couple of twigs from the pine tree outside my apartment. Hot glue the whole shebang together and onto the board and we're done. Except...that the board still seemed a little empty. So I glued on some stuffins too. What's a snowman without snow?!


And here you can see where the one I kept is currently residing. (The other one went to Kami's mom who gave me the cutest little Santa pillow last year that I'm still not over it.) He now has one arm missing thanks to my general lack of grace, but it does make him look like he's a friendly snowman veteran waiving at all who come to visit him. Maybe I should give him to Kami to put on her desk at work. (I'm not being rude I promise, I genuinely do admire Vets, especially those who get by with less than what they were born with) Oddly enough, I'm kind of digging this look. We'll have to see if the second arm even makes its way back into his life.



"Y'all come back now ya hear?!"

New Years Revolution!

Is it just me or was this Christmas extra stressful? Lemme hear an AMEN! I always find myself going way overboard and needing to give everyone I know something. I start out saying "I'm giving George* something" *names have been changed to protect the innocent That turns into "Well if I give George something, I have to give everyone who's ever even heard of George something too. I mean what if George says 'Look at this awesome gift Shannon gave me' and then that person is offended I didn't give them something? Then, what if they give me something and I don't have something to give them in return?!" (nevermind the fact that didn't happen once) It ends up being a total mess. I'm so happy to have that over with. In fact, I was so excited to finally have some time for myself to get back to reading crafty blogs. Only I found that was exhausting too because it was all Christmas related!!!! THUD THUD THUD Sorry guys, it seems my head bashing against my desk has made a permanent dent. I swear my poor BF has found himself, multiple times, prying me from the fetal position while I'm rocking back and forth, fully clothed in the hot shower, mumbling "For the love of all that's holy, when will it be over?!"

Lucky for him, it's a new fresh year! Actually I'm not sure how fresh it really is. Personally, I think someone forgot to defrost it when they pulled it out of the cryochamber where it's been in suspended animation for several decades. And by that I mean it's friggin' freezing cold. Just ask the frozen ball of horse doo that my BF threw at my car. That puppy hit my window sounding like a solid rock (I'm still shocked my window didn't break) then landed on my car hood where it didn't budge for the entire trip from Provo to Logan. Of course it came off on the 5 minute trip to Village Inn the next day and rolled under my hood right by my windshield wipers. Before it could thaw, my chivalrous BF decided to be kind and pull it out only to then throw it at me. Boys I swear....Anyway, that was way off topic. Sorry.

Back to the subject at hand. It's a new year and with that many people make all kinds of resolutions. To be honest, I'm no good at that sort of thing. My priorities change almost daily. So I like to make short term goals instead. My goals for the next few weeks are to finish sprucing up my bedroom. I really want to make it more of a retreat. I've already done a bunch, but it's still pretty sparse. I also want to organize my extra room and turn it into a craft room/office. This will take some time and probably move to the back burner knowing me, but it's higher on the list at the moment.

There are things I've done better this year, though. For example, I've kept my apartment much cleaner. I know there are plenty of people out there who would say "ouch, what was it like before?!" but I'm pretty happy with myself. It's shocking for me to see the difference in my energy levels, motivations, etc. when I'm not struggling emotionally. It's been a happy year for me overall and I can see potential for this year to get even better.

I think my main, long term goal is to learn to forgive myself for things I have done in my past. I want to be a nice person. I want to have people at my funeral say that I was a sincere friend and that I was always willing to help when there was a need. Some people tell me that I am nice. And yes, I can do nice things from time to time. However, I have done my fair share of unkind things as well. I think I have a good heart, but I've let outside factors like a lack of happiness take over and turn me into a person I never wanted to be. I've made decisions that seem outrageous to me now simply because I was unhappy. How crazy is it that in a crisis of self, I hurt others? It's really been weighing heavily on my mind. These choices have caused me to burn certain bridges so the opportunity to apologize in person is not immediately available. So what do I do? I think I've got a decent plan. Here are my thoughts and tell me what I'm missing here.

1. Don't let it get me too far down. I don't think it's a bad thing to feel guilty for mistakes in my past, but it's important I still remember that overall, I'm a good person.

2. Learn a lesson from it. I have to learn to recognize when I'm in a crisis of self and how to get through it without affecting others. It's a challenge, but I don't have to make the same mistakes again. I've got enough to be sorry about without adding more to the pile!

3. If I do have the chance, apologize. I am learning to stop making excuses and being defensive while I apologize. I'm actually surprised how automatic that defensive response is when I feel bad about something. For some reason I make excuse after excuse for myself. It's annoying just listening to me stick my foot in my mouth. I need to be heartfelt and humble or it means nothing.

4. Remember I'm nobody. Don't freak out, this is a good thing. I actually read this in a magazine lately and it really resonated. I'm not famous, I'm not internationally influential, etc. I can sit here and get all worried about the small stuff, but in the grand scheme of things, life goes on. This helps motivate me to move on from my past mistakes. I truly believe my future kindnesses will have a greater affect on the world. I just need to constantly work to improve myself and the rest will fall into place.

Man I've been annoyingly philosophical lately. I've really got to get my camera working so I can quit the introspective junk and show off some cute crafts I've done!