+*"~..ShAnDy..~"*+

Saturday, April 29, 2006
labour day.. long weekend

life is getting demanding. i am strained and stressed out.

what do i exactly want in life. help me..

i am protected under my love nest. i am very occupied at work. i have my darlings with me. time is not sufficient. yet my life seemed incomplete. i sill feel confused. sometimes. somehow. somewhere. i think i am insane. i feel head over heels happy now, and the next moment i fell into grief. ignore me. i'm just emotional and tempremental i guessed.

summary:
attended uncle tee and jackson 21st birthday @ sextant dining bar last sat 22 apr.
finally did a little catch with rowena.

sun 23 apr: buddy and me went to paya lebar for the vesak day performance rehearsal. dressed in kimono. hehz. not too bad. pp were amiable. friends were fun loving. the rehearsal ended ard 8plus. a kind soul then sent me home.

the following week.. eh.. erm... ah... memory kinda deteriorating. oh my tian. i'm only 20. i can't exactly rem the activities that took place each day. but i remembered. it was a busy week.

can i just bypass the days and come to this long weekend with labour day on the monday? hehz..

friday after work, dear waited for me and we headed to chinatown. he brought me to eat a "branded" XO fish head noodles. nice. yummylicious. then we had a short walk. we witnessed a terrifying quarrel. 2 men almost resulted in a fight. thank god.. the security personel at the train station managed to stop it. then i suggested we go to marina square. nice shopping mall. we headed home around 10 plus. had the usual activity at night with the same grp of pp. hehz.

sat: dear came over ard 5 plus took daddy's car then we went to westmall for dinner and to pick min min up. together we headed to compassvale for band practice. oh my tian. we lost our way. touring around the whole sengkang area. :( finally we arrived ard 8pm. band started at 6pm actually. haiz..
eh... i played my flute terribly. demoralised. my fingers no longer coordinates well ever since i abandoned it 3 years back. regrets.

after band, we drove min min and ting home. then we headed to batok for supper. met shifu, tanny and gang there again. after the fattening supper, dear and me headed to hao's place for mahjong. dear seemed to be in luck these few days. :)

sun: i woke up late. did a little household chores. had some family issues for me to settle. haiz.. thanks to god ma and god bro's help. dear came over and picked me up. we drove to westmall for dinner. min and nanwei came to join us. it was a late dinner for the 4 of us. then we sent them back and came back to my place for mahjong again. but this time round only the 4 of us. hui, jeff choo, dear and me. we played 2 rounds within 4 hours. hey we were fast. then the 4 of us sat down and talked. we chit chat for another 2 hours. we had a good laugh when we racked up the past. hahaha.. nobody can imagine how childish we were back in sec sch times. hahha.. they left my place ard 6am. yawnz.. my dark eye circles are getting bad. oh my tian!

mon.. may day: i woke up ard noon. then headed to meet dear and we went to jurong west to purchase some essential items for myself. dear had a upset stomach for days. :( i want him to recover soon. i hate to see him a sicky man.. dunno why. it makes me feel bored. i think. haha. i went for dinner with my family. had lotsa craps with my sister. she is jus so funny. haha. she is fierce in appearance but timid in nature. her jokes her actions were hilarious. haaz.

alright after the long weekend.. finally work is resuming tml. sigh..

Love, Shandy.
4:03 PM

aw....

i know i'm selfish. i know i'm paranoid. but can you just stay totally outta my life?

Love, Shandy.
3:13 PM

Saturday, April 15, 2006
..........

it pained me when i see my patients feel helpless. it really affected me when the only phrase i hear from them is, "i would rather die." my work had enlightened me. life is fragile. life is unfair. one can be complaining how awful the lobster salad taste, while another felt blessed upon finding a piece of bread. got what i mean? if u think u r pitiful, be calm and think again. there bound to be someone who is worse off. why must life be so hard? perhaps it is the only way we remember and learn.

Wed:
band practice
erm.. as usual most of us were late. so we ended up talking more than we played. its bad cos the competition is just around the corner. dear and me went back tog. it was pouring heavily and abruptly. thank god this auntie me have an umbrella in my bag.. ever since i started working, i always carry it with me. :P after band, dear, me, hui and min went to imm to have our late dinner. then poor dear rushed to book in. leaving the 3 girls shopping for food at giant. :)

Thur: 6 Apr 06
hey its shifu patrick neo aka wenxiang's birthday.
after work, i headed straight to westmall to meet min, tanny, aihui, liting, weishan, wilson and of cos e birthday man, wenxiang. we had sakae for dinner. after the fabulous dinner, we went to shop clothes for band performance. we then separated home ard 10pm.
tanny walked me home from westmall. we had the most wonderful and meaningful conversation. after these few years.. he finally tell me. we started off a bit shy. he was cute. ha.. but it was what i've always wanted to hear from him. frankly speaking i've been waiting... for him to say.... ~mind you.. its not bgr.. :P~ anyway i really appreciate him.. his presence in my life. thanks tanny. anyway it took us more than an hour to walk home. hehz. its a good way for me to slim down also..

Fri:
i meet kate after work for some shopping. the shopping mood was absent. we were feeling kinda bored. we wanted to spend.. but..... i only bought a tank top and a belt. how boring.. but nevertheless we still had a good time catching up. then i went to chinese garden to meet dear, and we walked home from there.

Sat: i'm on for work this sat. nothing much. work was the same. then i headed home for a good nap. while dear went to pray pray. then i went over to his place ard 6pm and tog with his family, we went to queensway for dinner. yummy the stingray at the queensway market was just irresistable. anyway we didn't join his family for giant shopping tat day cos we've promised to start mahjong with the usual gang early. so james sent us home. qiang, hui, jeff, yt, joe came over. erm.. we played till 5am. yawnz.. i was tired..

Sun: with less than 3 hrs of sleep i was awakened by mummy to go pray pray. i was really exhausted. we went down to guang ming san. tog with my cousins and relatives. it was so crowded. after the praying we went down to clementi to purchase some household things. mummy bought me a watch, hair dyes, a necklace and a pair of ear studs. hehz.. :) we then headed hm ard 4pm. i took a nap. but was awakened a couple of times. some family issues. we thought my sis commited sucide. this is how it goes.... we were all sleeping.. till mummy was woken up by a smell. it really stinks. then she followed the smell and realised it comes from sis's room. then a short while later sis's gf came. they knocked hard on her door but to no valid. nobody seemed to response. thus mummy woke me up. and the ist phrase i hear from her was "jie commited sucide." i was like appalled, terrified and lost. "whats going on??" i thought. we searched high and low for the keys to her room... when we finally managed to open her door. she was found lying on the floor, vomiting badly. it really frightened us. we've no idea what she consumed.. that resulted her to be unconscious. we dragged her to the bathroom.. pails and pails of water on her. till she was a bit conscious. when her gf and me tried to look for her clothes, we found a bottle of chivas.. and a cup in her wardrobe. the answer was finally revealed. she was drunk. ~phew~ we did had a good laugh too.

monday 10 apr: after work, i met dear and we went to watch ice age 2 at jurong point. cute show. very amusing.. :) then jianwen they all called. they suggested we go for some thrills. to hunt for spirits. heez.. and the destinated place was tang dynasty. this place of interest in s'pore was closed down. not demolished.. but closed. so we were considered trespassing. i was really frightened. cos it was in total darkness. we just couldn't even see each other. it was really really terrifying. the statues, the structures, the hall, the shop houses.. everything was scary. we didn't explore much.. cos i was really frightened out. we decided for a next trip. with more people... then we headed home ard 2am. dear stayed over. cos he was on leave on tue.. so do i. hehz..

tue 11 apr: dea and me went to causeway point. we went to change the rubber for his nokia ngage, lunch and also some shopping. :) we then headed home for dinner.

wed 12 apr: after work, i headed down to meet ting. and we went back to band. eh... we are still contemplating on the piece for competition. hopefully........ anyway band practice ended at 9pm. as usual.. we were discussing bout the nite adventure on thur nite.. hehz.. excited..

thur 13 apr: afdter work, buddy and me went to marina for a walk. we bought slippers! just a short shopping trip then we headed home ard 8pm. went out to meet the band members for the nite activity. dear, ting, tanny, qiang, jianwen, weishan, erik and oboe boy. his time round more pp.. we went to tang dynasty again. we decided to explore more places. deeper places..... it was a good experience. we found the place where they shoot legend of condor heros, the ice bed, the ice cave.. we also see many knights and horses figurines. there was this female lady sitting with her back facing us. long hair.. jus beside the door. ooo.. scary. i tot it i see ghost. ha.. to create the atmosphere.. jianwen hide and scare tanny. haha... funny reactions from him. however it was really stinko and humid in there. the ground was covered with trees and grasses that we can't even see the stairs. there were a part where we lost our way.... cos it was really dark.
after the adventuring trip, we went to taman jurong for fishball noodles. the auntie likes ting.. hehez.. she said she wants ting to be her daughter. haaz... after the supper we went for mahjong session. the mahjong session ended ard 4.30am. yawnz..

good friday:
i was woken up at 10.30am by hui. we were going to malaysia.. dear and me made jeff choo waited for an hour. he was quite angry.. sorry wor... heez.. then we meet hui at gombak. and we begin our journey. it was a long wait at the custom. and it was suffocating. an old lady fainted. finally we arrived in malaysia. we then meet min gerald and gerald's friend joe at city square. we had lunch in a nice fast food restuarant ~portuguese chicken~ i think the chicken was marvellous. :p then we went for some shopping... and we decided to go to holiday plaza. and there we bought many many dvds. they were so damn cheap. the 7 of us.. we bought more than 40 pieces. haha.. but the good thing is the shop helped us to deliever into s'pore. i've no idea how they did it.. but... they just did.. amazing.. we saw many lv, gucci imitations. mind you.. those shops were legally running in the shopping centres.. and the shop looked nice... but they were still imitations. suddenly i felt it was really amazing how s'pore can be so clean and strict by law. thumbs up. after all the shopping at holiday plaza, we headed to taman garden for dinner. hooray.. the seafood was cheap and fantastic.. many singaporeans were there as well..

time files.. by the time we decided to head back to s'pore it was already 9pm.. we had a great time at malaysia.. :) happy...

Love, Shandy.
3:01 PM

Sunday, April 02, 2006
work and play

i need a proper spacious working desk desperately. the people up in the office knew nuts except running after responsibilites when problems surfaced. hate it.

"we never cherish till we lose it." good phrase to describe the 4 of us situated in our new pathetic chemo room. i missed my old desk. though i used to complain it was small and restricted. sigh. frankly speaking, we were all overwhelmed with dissapointment and frustration ever since we moved in. thank god we stood and battled together. hopefully we will see changes soon.

wed, work was routinely tied up. so i shall not whine anymore. the weather was kinda blistering warm. the sun was sorching when foongli, jeremy and me went out for lunch. argh. i hate to perspire under my thick working jacket. after work, cindy and me went to city hall and waited for buddy. she was on leave. but yet, we gotta meet up and travel down to paya lebar to try out the costumes for the event on vesak day. i was dressed as a japanese lady. hehz. followed on, we went to toa payoh lorong 5 for the fantastic fishball kway tiao. no doubts, it was really yummylicious. joon then send us home from there.

i knocked off at 2pm on wed. my manager asked me to claim my hours. thus i went over to dear's place. we lazed at his place till 6pm. then we headed for band practice in shuqun. we had a little sectional practice before combined band. these few days of band practices invited old memories into my brain. i missed the indefinable feelings when i played in shuqun wind ensemble. like the way this unique feeling seeped into my musical heart, it quietly left me too. sigh. i hope the feeling will float back to me one day.

i meet dear at the hawker after work. we bought dinner back for his family. back at his place, we bickered. but it ended up with a good laugh. dear is cute. sometimes i mean. :P at 11pm, we came back to my place for mahjong session. hui & jeff, yt & joe, min min and qiang came over. dear and me won 10 bucks. :) mahjong eventually became our routine program every weekend. it was also a good way to spend some quality time together. isn't it?

on sat, i went down to paya lebar to meet buddy. we had a short rehearsal for the vesak day event. we met a few people there. they were amiable and nice. eveything ended around 5pm. then i rushed down to dearie's place. i thought i would be late to meet his family for dinner. in the end i was earlier to meet up with his sister than him. he took his own sweet time as usual. we went to chong pang for dinner. the food was marvellous. suddenly i realised i've been talking bout food. oh no. hope i didn't put on weight. sobz. then we proceeded to giant. we did the usual shopping, and james send dear and me back to my place to take daddy's car. then the 2 of us drove down to marina square. before we finally arrived, that idiotic dear, made me almost puked in the car. he drove fast, not reckless though but he did try to fool around. hurmp. till i grabbed a plastic bag from somewhere and hold it in front of me, he then finally stopped what he tot was fun. i think he was taken aback for a moment. he then asked gently, "Are u ok?" haha.. at least he did realise i was really feeling uncomfortable in the end. anyway we watched ~inside man~. i like the show. recommendable. cos it keeps your brain active throughout, guessing and contemplating over the story. tricky, yet exciting. however the ending did not really astounded me; which did dissapoint me a little. i mean jus a bit. i'm expecting more. ignore me. despite, it was still a nice show. the movie ended ard 2am. then dear and me craved for boon lay's nasi lemak. heez. so we travelled all the way back there for supper. i jus love it whenever dear separates the bones and meat for my chicken wing. :) love him.

Love, Shandy.
10:06 PM