"Everywhere you go, always take the weather with you" - Crowded House

Got back into Perth airport around 7:30. Got the bags almost straight away, but had to wait a while for dad to get the car out of storage.

Drove straight to some friend of theirs' house in Dalkeith to get passes so they could go to the cricket tomorrow.

Then went straight to Yuki without going home. I had chicken katsu, as usual, with some extra sushi rolls. Also had a lemon lime and bitters - but it was the Bunderberg type out of a bottle and tasted, well, too bittery.

Then went to my house and of course it was about 50 degrees in there.
Zorro was a bit put out, I think. But he seems to have stopped sneezing.

Didn't do much - it was hot and fairly late so just did basic unpacking and went to bed.

And that's that.

So ends Joe's sojourn in Melbourne....

Yip yip yip.

"You're a loony" - King Arthur, Monty Python

Got up about 8:15. Had shower, then did packing. Or cramming, more like.

Left about 10. Left the bags in storage and walked down to Elizabeth street. Took the 16 tram down to St Kilda Esplanade.

Had some sort of breakfast there - it was about 11AM. I had a so-called 'breakfast tortilla' - it was more appropriate for dinner, I think. Also had a regular latte for less than $3 - though it was a little on the bitter side. Probably the worst one I've had since I've been here, which is equivalent to the majority of the Perth ones.

Then walked down some suburban streets to the (so-called) beach, which stank a lot.
Found some model (to scale) of the solar system, but, although we walked down most of the foreshore we only got as far as Jupiter, which just goes to show....something.

Went up to the end of the St Kilda Pier. Got some Coke Zero at the fine kiosk, which was rebuilt to replace the one destroyed by fire on September 11, but 2003.

Then walked to Luna Park. Walked around in there, cos it was free. It was pretty empty.

Then took the tram back. Went to try and get drinks, but the nearby pub was shut. And it was almost 2, so went back, got the bags, and took a taxi to the airport.
Had a taxi driver who talked and talked and talked - and when he talked reminded me of Eric Bana from The Castle.

So got to the Tiger terminal - it had an inside section! Sat around and waited for 45 minutes till they opened up the check-in.

Went in and got food from the only cafe. I had a ham and cheese foccacia - it was OK. Also a Nestea green tea with citrus.

Boarded the plane at 4:30 and left just after 5 - there was a little delay with runway congestion. Nice empty flight, so we had a little more space to work with.

Homer: "Marge, why doesn't art like me? I never did anything to art"

Got up around 8.
Left just after 9 and walked down to Flinders station to meet the other brother. Wasn't too hard, really.

Went back to the alley for breakfast. They didn't have much left, but I got a bacon and egg muffin, which was quite tasty, and an iced coffee, which wasn't.

Then went over to the proper NGV art gallery thing, which was open this time.
Saw some 'people walking against the wind' as well as some Rodin sculptures, some Rubens portraits, a lot of drawings by Rembrandt as well as some paintings which I recognised (two old men disputing, mainly), and a Picasso. Plus some nice Egyptian runes. And various other stuff.

Then went back to the lane near Flinders station to eat, but walked through there to some 'Australia' arcade to a food court with a $10 meal Italian place. I had a veal parmigiana type thing and a lemon lime & bitters. The drink was weak and the meal was small. What do you expect?

Then, since we were there (kinda), went and got donuts from Krispy Kreme. It didn't seem to be a big store- I just got the assorted cos there wasn't enough of the plain ones.

Went and looked at St Paul's cathedral. Big, and stuff, y'know? Yeah.

Walked back down Swanson street, heading towards Myer. But before we could get there, our path was blocked by some protest about something in regards to Sri Lanka. Some members of the family got free DVDs.

Walked through Myer a bit. Nothing too exciting.
Then went back to the apartment.

Left about 5:30 with Sam only.
Walked over to Carlton gardens and took photos of the exhibition building.
Then took the good ol' green and yellow tram down to Spencer street, where Sam got off and went back to his place.
I continued down the line to the end of La Trobe street. Took some photos of the stuff down there. The (now infamous) West Gate was blocked by that other bridge, but.
So took the City Circle tram back to the apartment.

Left just before 7 with parents to the top of Collins street to watch Doubt. Good, but quite slow. The big confrontation near the end was the best part - of course.

Finished at 9 and walked down to Fed Square, looking for the 'traditional Australian' restaurant, which Tom wanted to eat at (he had gone to the skydeck while we were at the movies). Found it eventually, right opposite the place were the art gallery was and we had lunch with the sparrows. But it was closed.

So went to some outside place on the other side where the tennis was showing - but our view was totally obscured by a tree.
Had a chicken burger with salty chips and a lemon lime and bitters or 2 (much better than lunch!).

Then walked back.

"It goes right around the town, its the way to get around and its free - the Melbourne City Circle Tram!"

Not a great sleep. People kept turning the air-con on after it turned itself off, so it kept getting warm and was also fairly noisy.
Got up about 8:45 and left, by myself, about 9:15.

Walked down to the Queen Victoria markets. Bought 3 ties, but only the souvenir and clothing type stores were open, so I decided to wait till 10 to see if there were any more being set up.

Went to Hudson's Coffee on Elizabeth street and got a skinny (I finally remembered) latte, complete with local sparrow.
Then went back, but there was nothing new. Bought some shoes, anyway.

Went back through the charming heat past the old gaol (which is actually how I think it was spelled, which was nice - assuming it was).
Sat around in the room for a while - ate some of my Krispy Kremes for breakfast.

Then went to Myer and bought the suit what we had looked at last week and a pair of pants; spending a lot of money today (at least compared to every other day)!

Went down to Town Hall (going the wrong way first off - I worry about my brother's sense of direction) to see some poster exhibition. There was a grand total of: 8. So that didn't take long.

Went back to Fed Square to that NGV gallery again. Spent a little while there, but it was nothing special.
Saw an alright painting of some collapsed parliament building, which was supposed to represent something. Maybe.

So left the parents there and went with Tom, taking the tram down to Melbourne Aquarium.
Paid $30+ to get in (spending a lot of money today!).
The very first thing was the best - the penguins (no emperor's though - only kings. Bah!).
Then it was almost 2 so raced through to the very end for a (quite anti-climatical) tank feeding session.
Then went all the way back to near the penguins again (through a most disagreeable lift experience) and the parents were finally there.

Had lunch soon after at a small cafe. Just had a roll and orange juice, basically. There were sparrows on the railings outside looking fairly hot.
Then walked through the rest of the place - saw seahorses and turtles and the Bill Laurie nose fish and that kinda stuff. Also saw most of the stars of Finding Nemo, including Dory and a fish that seemed to like bubbles.
Left about 4:30 and took the free city circle tram (complete with tour sites and theme song).

Left the apartment about 6:15 and took the circle tram the long way (ie, continuing on around, not back the other way). Tom had left earlier to go to St Kilda with his married couple, so it was just me and the parents.

Went down the alley near Flinders station to some 'Red Rock' cafe. It closed when we'd been there about 15 minutes - at like 7:30, which seems pretty strange to me.
Had another chicken risotto and a lemon lime and bitters. The risotto was a bit cheesy.

Then walked over to the actual Hamer Hall, to the Playhouse theatre.
Watched 'The 39 Steps'; essentially a parody of some Hitchcock film - can't remember what its called.
Quite amusing - mainly the parts used for the transitions to make up for the shortcomings of stage.
Finished just after 10 and walked back.

"I'm still here; I'm still a fool for the holy grail" - Hunters and Collectors

Got up about 8:15. Left just before 10, because we had prearranged to meet uncle David at the ground at 11, but he phoned about 9:30 to say he wouldn't be there.

Went to the nearby Cafe Aurora. They had a very limited food selection, but managed to get the last ham and cheese croissant and a latte. Still no credit facilities.

Walked past parliament house - a very grand building, but didn't get a photo.
Walked through some more grassland to the (very understated) JFK memorial.
Went through the conservatory, I think to get out of the heat - but of course it was horribly humid in there. They were playing 'Moon River' very loudly; and seemingly on an endless loop.
Then went to Captain Cook's Cottage - but entry wasn't free.
So walked up to the model Tudor village and fairy tree. Tried to take a photo to make the model houses look like real houses, but it didn't really work.

Then walked over to the good ol' MCG. Waited for uncle Peter to show, who was handily replacing uncle David.

Looked around the museum, mainly at the Olympics display and the cricket - I kept thinking of a certain person I know who would've been very jealous. Hopefully.
Then went and watched the Shane Warne hologram (it was getting a bit much, having seen the play yesterday). Pretty impressive. The technology, not the man.
Had some food upstairs, which finally had credit facilities, so I paid.

At 2:30, went on the tour. The main highlight was that we got to go out onto a small fenced off section of the hallowed turf - which made the ground look kinda small actually, compared to TV.
Also went into the dressing rooms - but, again, it didn't seem like where they go after the grand final, for instance.

After the tour, went back to the museum and looked at some AFL stuff - mainly just the James Hird hologram, which didn't seem as technically 'clever' as the Shane Warne one, but I found it more enjoyable to watch cos he wasn't such an idiot.

Waited around a long time after, cos first we couldn't find mum (cos she didn't go on the tour), then Tom was taking his sweet time (as usual).
Eventually walked out into the oven-like weather and to the nearby Hilton to catch a taxi - but none showed up, and it wasn't the sort of weather to be waiting around in.
So went and got a tram instead down to Crown casino.

Walked straight into the nearest pub inside. I had 2 lemon lime and bitters(s).
Then walked around sort of looking for Krispy Kreme, which we eventually found after lots of trouble.

Did some 1c pokie gambling - lost about $5. Really rather dull.
Stopped at 8 and went and watched the fantasic moving dragon come alive. Wow.....

Then ate at the foodcourt. I had chicken risotto (again) and a Nestea green tea with mango. The food took quite a while to be ready, and of course it wasn't great - too many olives.

Then went and bought a half-dozen assorted box of Krispy Kreme.
Then went back, through the not much cooler night streets.

The air-con timer hadn't worked well - it seemed that it came on at 4, but went off at 7, so it wasn't pleasant in there for a while.

"It's like rain on your weddding day, a free ride when you've already paid, the good advice that you just didn't take" - Ironic, Alanis Morisette

Got up around 8:30. Left about 10:15.

Walked down to Collins street, then down to the alley near Flinders station.
Had breakfast at some little place that sold crepes - I had a jam one and a latte for about $5. There was some nice artwork in there in a colourful, abstract style which were of that cafe; a nice touch. Once again, they only accepted cash. I'm trying to find a place where I can pay, but I'm determined to only use credit.

Walked down across the bridge to the NGV art gallery next to Hamer Hall - it was closed. So walked past the floral clock (nothing to write home about there) to King's Gardens; or Horrid Bird Park, as I renamed it - it was full of prolific numbers of Indian mynahs, noisy minahs, ravens, domestic pigeons, blackbirds and starlings.
Went to the Sidney Myer music bowl - it was also closed. Could've taken photos of the piles of rubbish in there, but I felt that didn't capture the Christmas spirit what the bowl is famous for.

So walked back to Federation Square to the 'Setting the Scene' exhibit of various articles from production designers of various movies.
Saw an Oscar (with the engraving on the back of the stand - most peculiar) and models of the Matrix sentinels. Lots of stuff for the movie Australia, and also lots of old, foreign films; most of which I had never heard of, let alone seen.

Had a bit of lunch nearby in another part of Fed Square, at some Beer place. Wanted a beef pie, but they were out, so had a chicken one instead, plus a vanilla milkshake. Admired the cute sparrows, one of which came up and pecked my finger.

Then looked in the nearby art gallery (an offshoot of the NGV thing, apparently) at some collection of some artist/patron - apparently the largest collection ever donated (at least in Australia). It had some good stuff, but too much of the awful abstract type, like 3 different coloured painted squares.

Left about 4:15 and went back to the room. Hung around there for a while - I changed out of my shorts, which was a bad mistake.

Then went down to Melbourne Central, at Melbourne Tower (unlike all the other ones...) at 360 Elizabeth street, to meet one of Tom's friends - or the wife of one of his friends more accurately, probably. Took some panoramas from the 46th floor.

Walked down some lane near the China'town' street and had dumplings. I was expecting char sui pao, but it was the slimy ravioli looking one instead. Well, it was cheap, if nothing else. On the way out, passed the Gaylord Indian restaurant. Wanted to take a photo, but it was too obvious.

Then went down to Collins street, to the Athenaeum, to watch 'Shane Warne - the musical'. It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be; depends how much you paid for it, I suppose.

Finished at 9:30 and went back.

Shopkeeper: "Celebrate the independance of your country by blowing up a small part of it"

Got up about 9.
Had shower and that then packed and had tea and left before 10.

Went down the main street but, of course, nothing was open; except some Croatian deli. I didn't really want anything from there, but I was also hungry so got some ham and cheese toasted sandwich. Also had orange juice, but it was the real stuff; so not very nice. Perhaps not surprisingly, they didn't accept credit cards.
While everyone else was finishing, went to take photos of Jack Ryan's Irish pub (proprietors: Mi and Mi Sista Pty Ltd) and the Kasbah.

Then went off to find the Sale botanic gardens, but didn't, so walked around some more wetlands instead. Found some hard to read sundial and some wrens and a goose and more native hens.

Then drove off again to look for the botanic gardens. Found something this time with trees and that. Great.
Finally got a decent photo of a noisy minah, but only a distant one of the Indian mynah. Did find a nice red ironbark (all of which mum killed at their place) and a garden that smelled like curry.

Then took the 'scenic' route back to the train station and left pretty much on time (after Sam gave me the money for the clock).

Stopped twice along the way for about 5 minutes to wait for trains coming the other way. Once again didn't get to take a photo of the Pink Floyd factory.
The air-con wasn't working very well at all, which, of course, was a delight.
Up to about page 310 in my book - that's volume 2, to you.

So got back around 4:30. Took a taxi back to the same hotel as before, but a different room, at the front on the 5th floor. It was still being cleaned as we arrived, so took the opportunity to go with Tom and my dad to get milk and tram tickets. Well, they did that; I just rang Mogli - but he didn't have any new ideas.

Came back and they were trying to arrange a place for dinner with some uncle who seems to be traditionally disorganised; but I think we managed it in the end.
Rang V, but he's never been to Melbourne so yeah that didn't come to much. Probably after my florid descriptions of the general suckiness he won't be inclined to visit in the future, neither.

Left about 7.
Passed a Chinese dragon on the way (cos it was the first day of their new year), but the firecrackers were way too noisy, so didn't watch it for long.
Took a tram down Burke street, which eventually arrived at Docklands opposite the Melbourne Eye; just as I had predicted.
So I finally saw what I was sure must be the West Gate bridge - not bad. Later discovered that it is not quite it, but its close enough.
Quite an attractive area down there - almost a smaller version of Darling Harbour, I guess; though not quite as flash.

Went to Bellisimo and met uncle Peter and the 3 children (the sons looking absolutely nothing like I remember them, while the daughter looked exactly the same) and the ex wife (who seemed exactly like the tax accountant lady from Seinfeld who went crazy after George told her the truth).

And so I finally managed to have chicken risotto - they had 4 risottos on the menu; something I've never seen in Perth.
Had tiramisu after. All rather tasty, but nothing special.
The fireworks were happening about 9:15, but I didn't bother going out to try and see them.

Left about 10;30 and took the same tram back - we got off 1 stop too late, but it didn't make that much difference.

"What a gyp!" - John Travolta, Pulp Fiction

Got up around 8. I probably would've stayed in bed longer, but the plans from last night were that we were to meet in the local shopping centre, after breakfast, at 9:30.
Actually managed to leave about 9.
On the way, were, possibly accidentally, listening to local radio and heard the classic 'Cooking Crabs' by a, sadly deceased, colourful character. Apparently.

Went to the shopping centre, but the cafe and Muffin Break were both closed - it was Sunday, after all. So got a ham and cheese pastry from Bakers Delight and a latter from Donut King.
After that, the rest showed up, after going to our motel and finding that we weren't there.
Walked down to the clock place, but it was shut, of course.

Drove to Rosedale. Looked at some antique and other shops.
Then drove to Heyfield. Saw some houses, or something.
Then drove to Maffra. I was finally able to get a decent photo of a sulfur-crested cockatoo, as it was sitting there eating acorns.
Drove to the motor museum. Walked around there for a bit.
Then drove to Stratford-on-Avon. Looked at more trinket and antique shops.
Wound up at a cafe, which also sold liquor. Had a chicken and cheese and spinach and sun-dried tomato foccacia, and a Coke Zero. Pretty OK. Tried an eskimo pie (icecream) after, but it was just like a choc-wedge but with no stick, and a rim around the top (so it looked like a pie). Should've had a Monaco bar instead (basically the Eastern states name for a giant sandwich).

Then the others went home and we went to a gun powder storage building, then to some wetlands and walked around amongst the weeds. Found some native hens, at least.

Went and looked at the famous Sale swing bridge. Unfortunately, it only swings at certain times and we had just missed the last time.

So went back to the hotel and had tea and watched tennis and that.

Left about 7:30 and went for dinner (with all the rest) at Relish @ the Gallery. Parked in the wrong spot to start off with. Also moved tables almost straight away to get a window view.
Order took about an hour to arrive. Had some crispy potato chicken - almost like a schnitzel. Fairly satisfying.
Then had some tasty mocha cheesecake.

Left about 9:45 and went home and had tea, since I asked for some there but it never arrived.