wednesday morning back injury. cant twist too much. damnit. was advised to stop playing floorball for about 2 weeks. that's like 2/3 the playoffs man. shit. anyhows. game against smu was well. to put it nicely, not up to standard. i'll admit that smu deserved their win but i was thoroghly disappointed with fc squirrels. couldn't understand why they played the way they did and committed all the frigging silly and simple fouls. but we're still 2nd. quarterfinals will have us against Cornvix, a team that i've come to respect, not forgetting that Harun's the captain (Captain Marvel!)

marilyn - happy studying for prelims. loads of lucks for it. =)
ivan - china beckons? having 2nd thoughts about it though.
zhaoster - you ah. i think i nag more than enough le. haha. take care k? -hugs- =)
everyone else - STUDY LA. EXAMS IN 2 WEEKS

just a short note about my previous post. personal views are personal views. doesn't matter if you share them or not. as far as i'm concerned, i'm one of a number of people who are unhappy. you may hate my guts, think i'm arrogant or whatever else but i am who i am and i live my life my way, not yours. i have my own group of close friends you have yours. so what's with retaliating tags? that aside, friends will be friends and i'm not the sort to let things like that kill of a friendship unless of course things get out of hand. like ivan said, conflicts do happen between friends, no one expects everything to be smooth. 2 and a half good years so far. half more to go. no point dwelling and brooding on small issues like these. the only reason why i blogged about it is because it was a real bad day and i got really pissed off. so now. if anyone (or "someone") for that matter, feels the need or urge to tag back a response and hurl insults at me, go ahead. those are your views about me so it's all fair. but refrain from insulting family friends and religion. i believe most wont stoop so low to do that. so we'll see.

wednesday morning ok. day was pretty alright. dad's birthday. wheee. anyhows. was very pissed off with a certain someone from school. guess the frustration with him has finally reached a point where i can only say so much before i explode. selfish arrogant bugger. expects everyone to do things for him but when it comes down to small favours of us asking him to do for us, it's a big no. what's up with that? fuck.

anyhows. big news of the day: ivan and i may not be doing IHP if things turn out well. looks like we're both slated to go to China for internship. details are mostly unknown so far. but if that really happens, alot of things will be screwed up. medical at cmpb. ivp (SHIT!) and even my christmas holidays. but we'll see. China. 5 bloody months there. don't know if i can survive. haha!

My Chemical Romance - I'm Not Okay (I Promise)

Well if you wanted honesty, that's all you had to say.
I never want to let you down or have you go, it's better off this way.
For all the dirty looks, the photographs your boyfriend took,
Remember when you broke your foot from jumping out the second floor?

I'm not okay
I'm not okay
I'm not okay
You wear me out

What will it take to show you that it's not the life it seems?
(I'm not okay)
I told you time and time again you sing the words but don't know what it means
(I'm not okay)
To be a joke and look, another line without a hook
I held you close as we both shook for the last time take a good hard look!

I'm not okay
I'm not okay
I'm not okay
You wear me out

Forget about the dirty looks
The photographs your boyfriend took
You said you read me like a book, but the pages are all torn and frayed

I'm okay
I'm okay!
I'm okay, now
(I'm okay, now)

But you really need to listen to me
Because I'm telling you the truth
I mean this, I'm okay!
(Trust Me)

I'm not okay
I'm not okay
Well, I'm not okay
I'm not o-fucking-kay
I'm not okay
I'm not okay
(Okay)

monday morning ahhh. what a day. floorball was all good. glad NPSQ got their first win. could see that it meant alot to them. FCSQ did ok for today's game. as usual. lost concentration in the 3rd period allowing RP to get 3 goals back real quick. still won 5-3. thank God. anyhow's. i think played real good today. really got my groove. fluid movement and passing (except for the 1st period. failed to flick the ball once.damnit).got 3 shots on goal.all 3 was saved.really beginning to think i have no luck in front of goal.sigh
oh yeah.somehow widya and i are in the same boat with regards to something.shan't say what.but well.hope things work out fine on her part.hope mine goes well too though i'm kinda unsure as to what to do.ladaa.

wednesday hard to let go. guess i'm already past the point of wanting to carry on. things change. they always do. i've never bought the notion that things can still be the same, pretending that nothing has happened or will ever. it just doesn't make any sense

moving on..

monday morning getting sick and tired of trying to get a team to stop blaming each other.doesnt help that there are some people who say one thing and do another.solution to all these? let them sort it out among themselves.at least that's what fahmi (the small one) says is best.and i have to agree.but to a certain extend yazid najib and i have to step in before the team implodes and there wont be a 2nd season for them

anyway.weekend was fun.saturday was mum's birthday.had jap for lunch and seafood for dinner.dinner was categorically ruined by lousy service and lousy quality food (well.2 dishes).but i guess what counted was the fact that the whole family was together

i don't normally blog in school but today's one of those exceptions. you know how it feels to have a certain fading hope just go under in one fell swoop. something someone said or maybe something that happened. well. yesterday was one of those days.well.make it this morning.a long standing believe of hope and prayer just came crashing down. like i said in my previous post. life's gotta move on ain't it? time will heal all. maybe. hopefully. but i doubt it. how do you get over someone so quickly having had feelings for close to 4 years. -shrugs- life goes on. just thankful for all the wonderful people i've known. her included.

wednesday suddenly time passes so fast.all of a sudden my IHP starts in september and project outline + TOR has to be submitted by 29th of august. looking forward to working with ivan on it. and oh yes. suddenly NS seems so near. medical is on the 2nd of nov.
floorball league's almost done. cant say that i've had a very good season. i'm quite sure my play's improved quite abit. 2 assists so far and definitely NO luck in front of goal. one of the drawbacks of playing as a playmaker i suppose. you playmake. hardly score.
uni applications beckon. ivan's applying soon. i'm still considering my options. of course smu would be the best. but who knows. so here are the options so far:

NUS - Com Sci (Comms and Media), Com Sci (eCommerce), Com Sci (Information Systems)
NTU - Com Engr, Business IT
SMU - Information Systems with 2nd Major in Psychology/Political Science
Kings College of London - Com Sci with Business Management
U. of Western Australia - Com Sci, Business IT
U. of New South Wales - Com Sci, Business IT
U. of Melbourne - Com Sci
Carnegie Mellon University (US) - Information Systems

hope i'll make it to either one.guess all's left for me is to ace my IHP and see what gives. of course. NS is still a factor. still hope i might live my dream of being a pilot or C3 WSO. i wont complain if i'm in the army or wherever else. just as long as i make it to OCS.

anyhows. was talkin to a couple of people. relationships. how weird. seems like i'm not the only one who has a knack for falling people who're either attached, play hard to get or just plain hard to get (naturally though). but well. what's fair in life? sometimes loving a person can be so easy yet that person doesnt see it. example? take marilyn. hah. never-ending cycle since God knows when. then there're times when you think you've made it but WHAM! the world comes crashing down. example? sarah. life goes on dont it?

sunday burnt. literally. spent the whole of saturday at tampines refereeing the PAYM 3 on 3 games. bloody sun was scorching and it wasnt exactly covered. anyways. today's game went fairly alright. missed 4 chances but screw it. my line scored 1 only but we still won 10-2. abit pissed with big fahmi. no frigging idea why he keeps picking on my line. not that we really give a damn about him though. i mean. other lines concede a shitload of goals and we get the scolding? whats up with that? fag.