history lesson

haven't blogged in eons! let's see.. what has happened since?

Honda came into the picture. totally outta the blue that a black fuzz would break into boon lay as i was getting home one night.. we initially wanted to just get SPCA to pick him up the next day, but his mannerisms reminded me soooo much of Osiris (the whole sitting on my chest and purring thingy) that night.. that i just had to adopt him. gave him his name cuz he sounded like a lil' motorbike as he purred his heart out. 

 i got married. like the whole gate-crash and wedding dinner thingy.

  
found another cat. this time from a longkang near boon lay. heart a mew-ing as we were on the bike.. couldn't bring ourselves to ignore it, and we did a u-turn to go find the source of that sound. turns out it was this lil' thingy that was stuck in the drain. alex reached down to save her and she stole our heart away. i went to get a terrapin holder from blsc, and in she went as i carried it back on the bike to havelock. she turned out to be a greedy lil' furball, but we kept her and called her Suzuki.. or rather Kiki. she's now like 10x the size of this pix. lol.

maybe i should do a separate post about the cats. haha.

got pregnant and then lost him. found out that the pregancy wasn't going well on april's fool.. oh, the irony. went back a week later and found that i lost the baby. that was hard. have never felt so emotional.. so.. numb. went for a D&C the next day.. and did the whole confinement thingy.. it took me a while to get over. but i'm fine now. got a tatt (like finally) to remember this baby by. just a small star outline behind my ear. sometimes i even forget that i have that tattoo.. just like i would forget i lost a baby.... it wasn't a normal pregnancy (molar pregnancy).. but whatever it is, the gynea gave the all clear to try again. so yea.. we will. =)

anyway, main reason why i'm here again.. was a conversation we had with pa. things have been drama-mama at home. the whole.. he's not talking to so-and-so, she's not talking to this-and-that. sighs. alex and i are trying to keep things cordial with all parties.. so we're doing our best to be neutral amidst all the drama.

went up for dinner at boon lay as usual.. as with every Sunday. we do try to chat with pa when we go up.. today.. we talked about his life. to be honest.. i'd rather talk to him about history.. about times that have past.. than to talk to him about life presently. sometimes.. feel that his opinions are so different from mine, that things inadvertently lead to squabbles. and i try to avoid that. so yes. his life.

schooling years - pre-primary
he went to a kindergarten near haw par. unforch i've forgotten (yea yea. already.) the name of it. but it was in the vacinity. he was sharing about how by then he already knew the differences between himself and the "rich kids".. who would have chauffeurs sending them to school.. ma jies who would wait for them in school.. and feed them apples and bananas during recess. 

schooling years - primary
during P1 and P2.. he went to 2 different primary schools - one with a focus on english education (monfort?) and another with an emphasis on chinese (he forgot the name). after those years.. he went on to Jurong Primary.. the school was located near the existing PIE.. but the original building was burnt down subsequently. this was also the school that the sisters went to!

he did his PSLEs twice.. first time wasn't counted cuz of corruption.. which caused the papers to be leaked. but the second time he did the papers, he didn't score well enough to be admitted to a secondary school.

schooling years - secondary
having not been able to go into a normal secondary school. he first went to a madrasa - a malay religious school that is alone Victoria street (bugis area). being the only chinese boy, he got picked on.. but he fought back.. even against others who were bigger sized than him. all in all, he spent a few months there.. less than a year.

then Monk's Hill had an opening for him.. so there he went. but back then, the intake was too large that he had to attend a later session.. which meant lessons started at 3pm, and went on all the way till 8pm. he had problems taking a bus back, cuz his size meant that he didn't look like a typical teenager.. and no normal teenager would have lessons ending at 8pm!

schooling years - post-secondary
he got into St. Joseph's.. but after a few months, as there was a rich kid who wanted in.. and could donate the money, he was asked to leave. so yea. that totally cut short his post-secondary education.

working years
his first job was to be a clerk at MOE.. and his first pay was like $130+.. with a COLA (cost of living allowance) of $40. lol.. it was doing mainly research.. from there, it was to JVI and then ROV. 

didn't really talk much about his working experience.. cuz we were more interested in his..

dating experience
mummy surprisingly wasn't his first girlfriend. his first was an indian girl that he went out with for a few months. and then it was a rich girl (the daughter of the mistress of a certain well known biscuit maker). all these were met through parties. him being a smoker.. got invited to pretty much a lot of these. what's the significance of being a smoker? well, apparently that made you sociable. that you'd make friends while smoking with other smokers. guess that's still true till today.

then, came mummy. he met her at a chalet / party.. she was the nanny of his colleague's kid.. and she had come along. apparently what attracted pa to her was her "big boobs" and "big bum". LOL. especially with the fact that she was wearing tight clothes.. a pink cap-sleeved t-shirt with pants, to be specific. lol! that would've been in '64/'65. and they dated all the way till '68 when they got married.. and that's only cuz ah gong put his foot down to say that pa couldn't possibly be dating forever.. i guess back then, 3-4 years of dating was really long. 


it was fun. to learn about the parent's history like that. it's a weird feeling.. it's like.. all these years.. your parents have been well.. your parents. that's it. sometimes you'll forget that they were young too. that they had lives before you were born.. before even they were married. and it's nice. to know all these. i just thought it was important i noted these stories down. so that i wouldn't forget. that pa was a young man once...

dear osiris

do you remember the first time you and horus came home? it's kinda fuzzy (don't blame me.. it was afterall 13-14 years ago!) but i remember being really excited about ju jie bring kittens home. like, finally! mummy relented!! haha..

i remember at that point, we haven't even bought the kitty litter yet.. we had to make do with newspaper.. but seeing the two of you sitting at the kitchen.. so small and scared.. it just melted my heart. i remember thinking to myself that you had a really nice diamond-shaped pattern on your head.

do you remember your first home? its the corner where the fridge stands now. i remember opening the make-shift cupboard "door" and sitting with you guys.. you were the one that purred sooo hard. so hard that i really thought it was your tummy rumbling. and that you were hungry. so i happily gave you two more food even though i wasn't supposed to.

but of course.. your territory expanded.. you guys started escaping from that lil' corner.. and soon.. you guys expanded to the entire kitchen.. we managed to control you for oh.. 2 months? before you started expanding again. soon it was the living room.. and then the bedrooms as well.

i remember taking sooo many pictures of you too.. you guys were such frisky lil' kittens.. how could we resist? i wish i had taken more tho.

the way you two would sleep together.. chase each other around the house. fight to play with the toys we brought out. compete to see who got the lizard first. silly cats..

do you remember sleeping on top of the television set? haha. i guess you liked it there cuz it was warmer. but it was such a pain trying to watch tv with your tail swishing at the screen. so distracting! or when you fell off the set? priceless laa.

you had us blown when we discovered you liked durians. expensive, good durians at that. how you would scoff at the lousier fruits.. only eating the best.

you were always the one that i was closer to. i could never figure horus out. him and his slippery ways. haha. you were the one that would clamber onto me to lick at my collar. i'd hear your purrs.. and feel your claws digging into me.. but i think that gave you comfort.. as i too grew to like those lil' moments myself.

after horus left.. i still remember vividly that evening actually. the way you sounded when i came home. it just broke my heart. you had lost your best friend. your brother. i couldn't help crying for you the tears you couldn't.

but we did have some good times together right? after horus left.. its like you permanently moved to stay in my room. the corner of my bed can prove it. i think you murdered 3 sets of bedsheets.

you're such a silly cat you know? you got to be so sticky! sleeping with me.. going to the bath with me. you never did wanna let me outta your sight. silly baby. didn't you know i'd never abandon you?

not even when alex and i were studying would you give up. you'd claim our attention by sitting directly on top of our notes. or if we'd managed to push you to a corner.. you'd make sure your tail was swishing at us. silly cat.

i'm sorry for not being tolerant towards you.. i'm sorry for all the times i've hit you. all the times i've locked you out of the room.. of the times i went on holidays and was not around to sleep with you.

and now you're not at home as i type this. you're not around to annoy me by clambering about the keyboard. or by sitting on the mouse. i hope that as i type this. you've managed to get some rest at the vet's.. and that your neighbours are keeping things down.

osiris.. i really always thought that you would be around with me during my wedding. that i'd be able to take pictures with you when i'm all dressed up in my gown. that you'd be around to accompany me on that very special day. but it seems you wouldn't be able to. why did the years past so fast? why did i not treasure you more. why is it that we only realize our mistakes when there isn't enough time left?

if i'm so upset now.. i don't know how i would be when the time comes. am i wrong for wanting to end your misery? for wanting to decide your life? would you hate me? i just don't want you to suffer. as i saw how much weight you lost since horus left, it just broke my heart. i can't imagine seeing you waste yourself away.

but i will miss you you know? how you'd clamber to hide inside the blankets when a storm's approaching.. how i would wake up and see you peering down at me. how i would realize that you've actually managed to open the door on your own.. and that you are in the room again.

how? how could i possible live with the knowledge that you're not gonna be around.. that you're not lying on my bed or my table? how can one so small.. take up such a big space in my room.. my life.. my heart? i just can't imagine life without you..

but now i have to make the decision. would you think me heartless? but i just don't want to see you in pain.

everyone loves you.. we all love you so much. even emi jie told me she's sad. and pa can't bear to let you go.

why isn't there miracles?

i just turned to my table.. thinking that you're there beside me as i type this. giving me that look. but you're not.

i love you so much osiris. so much so much.

well, went for a trip with my love 2 weeks back.. that was the 873^th day anniversary present i mentioned about 2 posts back.. just to clear things up.. we don't actually count our anniversaries in days.. just that he wanted me to answer a question before he would give me the present.. and he was just making things difficult for me by making me tell him the number of days we were together for.. 873's no special day.. just that i was pestering him too much that he had to give me the pressie then. hahaha

so yea.. a trip to genting and KL.. just the 2 of us.. and it was fantastic! i really couldn't have asked for a better traveling partner.. you know it helps when he kinda lets you have your way like, 99% of the time.. not that i'm taking it for granted of course. its just.. nice.

so yes.. we left on the 6^th nov, thurs (which coincidentally was our 900^th day together. hahaha) boarded the late bus to genting.. and totally concussed on the way up. only woke for the toilet breaks..



we've reached!! we thought we could lun the weather, since it was only gonna be a short distance from the bus terminal to the hotel.. but nooooo. i was freezing my ass off in like, 5 secs. my teeth were chattering! with so much fats, it amazing i still feel cold. sheesh.



but 'twas super early when we reached on Friday.. like 5am? check-in time was only at 12pm (or is it 1pm? damn. i knew i should've blogged earlier.. sheesh) so we wandered around.. gambled.. and met our first malaysian friend!

met her while having our breakfast at kfc.. and she was super naughty! refused to eat what i fed her.. and only ate from alex.



went for the customary tour outside the hotel to enjoy the scenery.. and took some pix. but the damn sun was so bright, all our photos ended up squinty eyed and weird. the only decent one is the one above.. of which i forgot to un-zoom the cam after taking pix of the scenery. not trying to scare you with a huge-ass pic of me okay.



kinda reminded me of the pic we took the last time we were at genting with his group of friends. that was during the christmas of 2006? yea.. almost 2 years ago.. and nothing seems to have changed much. i'm still wearing the same jacket.. and i think we were standing around the same place. wow. the creativity!!



it rained that evening.. heavily too.. when we ventured out in the night to gamble (again), we noticed that it was totally foggy/misty/cloudy outside. i'm no geog student, so they are kinda all the same to me. but it was fun! we stepped out and once again, froze our arses off..

that is probably the most scenic pic we took for the entire trip. and i'm loving the wind-in-my-hair effect. haha.



so after an unsuccessful night at the casino.. we left on sat morning for KL.. woke up for breakfast at our hotel.. and had a lil' time to spare before we headed for the bus to KL and we ended up at the arcade.. again. we seem to always be spending time at the arcade!

well, we were almost late for the bus.. cuz we were frantically trying to earn those ticket stubs thingys to exchange for the jay bust i had my eyes on. ended up running back to the hotel room to grab our bags and to check out.. ran our lungs out to the bus terminal.. kinda felt like a secondary school kid again.. haha



going down to KL was like, stepping into an oven after genting.. tried taking a pic of the twin towers from the bus.. but missed miserably. sighs. stupid tree.



stepping into our hotel at KL was heavenly! we stayed at Capitol Hotel right in centre of the everything.. we were like a 1 min walk away from Sungei Wang! (note i didn't bother to mention the name of the hotel at genting.. it was pathetic. never going back there!)

love love Capitol Hotel. i thought it was really cozy and gorgeous!!



the day view from our hotel room. *beams*



the night view from our hotel room. *double beams*



tried taking pix with the towers as a backdrop.. i find nothing wrong with the above pic.. but the finicky boyfriend thought the window beam beside me was an eye-sore.. we must have taken like 817568 pictures.. but my hand kept moving away from the "optimum" spot. sighs



ended up laughing our heads off by the 815767^th attempt



the successful 815768^th attempt. hehs. but i look yucky.



all dressed up to club at KL. which was a disappointment. hahaha. not my typa scene i guess. it was weird with all the erm. balloon throwing? like, okaaaaaayyyyy.



i know this pic looks a lil' super-imposed.. i dunno. is it me or do i look super-imposed onto a pic of the towers? alex took it at some road junction near the clubs. and he had to kneel down to take this pic. haha. kept teasing him that was the first time he went down on bended knee in front of me. hahaha



after an exhausting weekend.. we packed up and headed back to good ol' singapore on sunday.. we left with 2 bags.. one each.. and reach singapore with 5. hahaha. man, we do know how to spend..

i really enjoyed myself. i know this entry probably would seem very rambling to everyone save for alex and i.. but well, too bad. hahaha. i really had a fantastic time! sighs. i hate the feeling of coming back.. to work.. to responsibilities.. it feels so good just forgetting everything else back home even if it was for a mere 3 days..

i can't wait till our next trip!!

omg.. i did it! i completed my 10km run today!

okaaayy.. i didn't run the whole damn thing.. but bah. nitty gritty details. the fact is.. i did it!

but as you can tell by my absolutely haggard face.. it was a harrowing experience.. woke up at 5-friggin'-30 am (hence the weird eye bags) and i've got the aching muscles/tendons to prove it. yes. tendons. my archilles tendon is killing me! i can barely walk down stairs now. bahs.

thank goodness i managed to get out of work tmr. as you know.. i'm supposed to work public holidays.. but thankfully i've got a very understanding boss. hehs

anyways. now at arena bk studying with me love.. he's having exams now.. have i mentioned? so yeaps. jiayous baby!! and hehs. happy 889th days anniversary! though if i had blogged yest, it would've been nicer righto? so erm. happy belated 888th day anniversary? haha

rawr. there's a stupid fly buzzing around me now.. and oh! there was this gross mini-stag beetle lookalike thingy on my slipper just now.. yucks. arena bk is infested with creepy crawlies!

happy 873 days anniversary to you too my darling!!

thanks so much for your gift.. i will do my best with the planning and hopefully all goes well k? its our first.. and it will be the best!!

*happiness*

i guess all that torturing was worth it.. hees. cuz its only cuz you adore me right? but next time don't adore me so much la. haha. all that suspense was killing me. but seriously, thanks for torturing me.. sighs. i feel so bad that instead of spending time on your studies.. you were secretly planning all this. just leave the rest of the planning to me le k? you have to concentrate on your second last sem.. cuz you need to get your degree with distinction for me!! that's the ultimate present ya?

jiayou bb!! *waves pompoms*

okaayyy.. this is kinda like an obligatory post cuz well, my cat kinda scrambled up my lap.. and he's refusing to budge [trust me. i've got the scratch marks to prove it.. yikes]

well.. work's been fine the past week. presented my first presentation.. and i guess you could say i pretty much got a HD for that. haha. but i've got a bad feeling that from now on.. i'l just be the "presentation girl" the one that talks but doesn't really know anything bout what she's talking.

[oh look. osiris just leaped outta my lap.. but since i've started...]

but the downside of things is well.. i pretty much fell ill. boo. just 3 measly pathetic months into a job and i fall ill.. and not the chao-keng kinda ill. its like, feverish-i-wanna-faint-at-my-desk kinda ill. not fun. nu'uh. so yea. left early from work on wednesday (6pm), even earlier on thursday (4pm) and totally mc'd on friday. best thing? i already planned to take leave on the following monday.. so yes!! super long weekend!

but bad. now i don't feel like going back to work. sighs. can i resign and be a tai-tai? *sobs* anyway, i've got a new addiction right now. the anime full metal alchemist! i'm sucha dweeb.

nvm.. i'm just totally looking forward to going tanning tmr. uh-huh.. i took leave to go tanning again. ahahhaha. i'm gonna be tannnneeddd.. *woots*

great. i had my entire blog entry planned out in the morning.. and now i've completely forgotten every single thing. how convenient. that's why i don't blog anymore..

actually? the desire to blog has pretty much dissipated. [brilliant deduction edna. as if no one realised that yet] honestly? after spending 12 hours facing 2 huge-assed screens at work.. coming home and blogging isn't exactly what i call relaxation y'know.

and yes. i do work 12 hours. sighs. i spend more time at office than i do sleeping. rawr. okay okay. i'm making things sound more serious than they really are.. let's start from the beginning. hmmm. come this tuesday.. i'd have been working for 3 months? [woohoo! milestone!] but the OT-ing only started about 2 weeks back..

then again. its probably gonna continue for the next 4 months. seeing that my "teacher" is going on maternity leave. [boohoo] so i guess that's goodbye to my social life [wait. what social life!?] goodbye to squeezing in irritatingly crowded mrts during the rush hour home. [thank goodness] goodbye to my sanity.

sian.

sometimes i get to a point of working that i wonder what all this is for. working you know? i'm not like angel.. filling the minds of our country's brilliant future with chemistry. all i'm doing is wasting a whole big bunch of paper. sometimes i feel like i'm 6 years old again.. playing "office" with my cousin claire.

shuffling paper.. opening and closing files.. scribbling stuff on paper. rushing to other places to get files so i can open and close them. banging away on the keyboard. cursing and swearing when i type something wrong. cursing and swearing when the printer runs out of paper.

except that i didn't curse and swear when i was 6.. or did i?

don't gimme crap about how i'm contributing to the economy. i wanna be out there! [tanning preferably] doing something worthwhile! [okay. i just realised tanning is exactly worthwhile] doing something i love! [tanning is definitely something i love]

sighs. then again. i'm not some millionaire's daughter.. so scratch that. don't worry. you'l see me back at my desk on monday. i'm not about to quit or anything.

but yes. lemme continue complaining about work before i move on to some pictures. haha. i have to face 2 huge-assed screens every single fucking day. sighs. i swear. i work till i tear. [as in cry] cuz my eyes hurt too damn much. sighs. [note to self: buy presentable spex] damn my vanity.

okay. end of ramblings about work. but i realised something. blogging is something like talking to yourself ainnit? then why am i adding in all those lil square brackets!? its like, i'm talking to myself on top of talking to myself. weird.

*

so i had my convocation a week ago on the 29th. it would've been nice dressing up in fancy harry-potter gowns and meeting up with all your classmates. BUT I HAD TO BE LATE. rawr. i got a shock when the usually late krystyn msg'd me at 8.30am "girl. are you here yet?" i was all like, "what the fuck are you talking about!? why would i be in school so freaking early!?"and then i found out that i had to be in school at 9.10am. great.

but i graduated. took my picture with some chao ang moh. receive a piece of paper which costs $27,000. and yes. here are the pictures..

note. i look horrid cuz 1) i seem to have lost all patience to spend hours in front of the computer [my eyes remb?] tweaking pictures. 2) i was late remb? i couldn't blow dry my hair properly.. my make up was half fucked. sighs. woe is me.



that's me that's me! first in the queue.. waiting to go up. praying that i wouldn't trip and fall in front of everyone. haha.



me with the lao ang moh. hahaha. evidently my dad was sitting really far away from the stage.



love and i. with the graduation stitch he got from me. now.. i wonder where he got that idea from?



oh i look like crap!! stop looking at me! but yea. that's krystyn. the ta pai late girl. who happened to be early for the convo which i was late for. -_-

i actually thought my hair was very brown.. but after looking at this pix. no what. quite normal. same color as hers what. hahah.



benson, cl and i.. man. i miss school. but then again.. cl just joined me at my work place. hahaha



together with andy yeo.



papa, mummy and i with my $27,000 piece of paper



love and i once more.. but this picture is blurry! emi jie's cam is too high tech for pa. haha



lastly.. family pix taken at gloria photo studio.. i must say they are fantastic! they have every conceivable gown.. both local and foreign university.. [free advertising. haha] pity dom kor didn't manage to find out what his master's degree gown looked like. sighs.

top row from left to right
dixon, ju jie, me!, emi jie, dom kor
bottom from left to right
aidan, mummy, zachary, pa, brendan

don't you think zachary looks like a splitting image of my dad? the photo above was one of the 22 the studio gave me to choose from. but happily i returned the one that i wanted to be framed to the studio. haha. so you'l just have to make do with the second best. =D

*

well yups. i guess that's it for now. till the next time then! [god knows when that'l be] toodles!

okay okay. i know i hardly ever blog now. sighs. sue me.

its been so long. i feel so out of touch? haha. but i guess i have only myself to blame.

mmm. how long has it been since my last post anyways?

well. i've been working at BoNY for about.. a month and a half now. things are getting better i would say. the people (some) are friendly.. so i'm not exactly dying there.. (except during 10am-11.30am.. killer i tell you)

and hmmm. i ran the shape run! 5km. don't scoff. its an achievement for me okay. and credit goes to my emi jie who signed me up. (she completed it with me! as alex puts it.. "her achievement outshines your's) and of course, my own personal trainer.. who never fails to annoy me into running. but well.. for my own good la. haha.

now thinking about signing up for a 10km. hoho!

so ya la. i blogged today! hurry! go buy 4d. wonder when's the next time i'l blog. hahaha