Not just bad habits

A few things that i need to keep myself reminded of how imperfect, useless, pathetic and sometimes idiotic i can be. I need to stop this bullshit i'm pulling, i must change, it has to start now.

Problem No.1
This is probably my biggest problem. I have a big difficulty on finishing something i started. I tend to pull out/surrender/give up when the going gets tough, when i encounter an uneasy situation. And this has led me into being a jack of all trades, master of NONE. Some people say i'm good with music. I can play all kinds of instruments, but the fact is i'm never REALLY good at any.

I already feel like a loser (even if you really don't think so), This has got to STOP.

Problem No.2
I'm not respecting other peoples time the way i should. I mean, i'm not doing it well enough. I've failed to be punctual on quite a number on occasions. And the main victim for this is definitely her. I'm so sorry for that.

And sorry to everyone who has been suffering from Ben's pathetic time management.

Problem No.3
I'm lazy, and i am not giving my best in the things that matters most to me.

Problem No.4
Selfish sometimes, which has led me into a rude boy wanting things my own way.


I gonna stop all these crap from now on.

Help me God.

-----

Ken just left for Michigan. It's been a little quiet here.

Uni is starting in a week's time. Soon it will be my turn to leave.

Anyone gonna miss me?

I'm back!

I'm back from nowhere. The longer i leave my blog post-less, the lesser i open this page. So here i am WEEEE to update my oh-so-caring-and-loving-friends about my not so happening life.

I'm on holidays for about 2 more weeks? And i still haven't plan any hiking trips yet. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak ahah I really want to track Titiwangsa or Tahan this time, accomplishments sake, but the same question always comes up: WHY SPEND MONEY AND TIME TO TORTURE MYSELF?!

Anyway
- I've been playing poker, late nights out. It's fun OKAY.

- Giving Blitzone business playing DOTA and CS. For ken's sake okay, he's leaving to the States soon haha It's ALSO fun OKAY

- Went to Port Dickson the last weekend with rvn. It was better than i expected it to be lar, the beach was horrible but the resort was nice. Avillion hotel

- OH OH, THE BIBLE QUIZ TROPHY IS BACK IN SSGC. I contributed alright. I'm also a Nehemiah expert. This is the first year that i actually prepared for it.

- I missed camp meeting the other day! haha I forgot that it was Tuesday. I overslept and woke up to blueserver. Lifeless i know

Been feeling a little lost and "drive-less" for life. This may be the most unproductive holiday i ever had. Just don't have the motivation to do anything.

Help?

I should be fine soon, right?