swingset chain.

today, like many other days, has ended in a good note.
and that is all that matters, isn't it?

i spent my break at the uni cafe, trying to do some readings.
overheard random conversations before i plugged my faithful ipod on to concentrate.
i witnessed the boys at the next table; probably freshies, first year in uni. they could have been best friends in high school but i could tell there was a drift among them. two of them seem cold towards this one, the one who has just been shopping, buying a new pair of expensive lee jeans, the one discussing about all these cool sneakers he owned, the one trying to fit into the cool, fashionable crowd in uni. the two were acting superior, thinking they were "cool" enough, perhaps they were better looking (but who knows? since looks are subjective anw), being arrogant at the same time nodding and smiling awkwardly (yet obviously discriminating and judging) when the one tried to hold a conversation. the one left after feeling out of place. perhaps the two thought he was nerdy but they started playing with "fantasy trading cards" (or whatever u call them) when he left, so who's the geeky one?
it is random but i felt angry. who are they to judge their friend? who are they to let society dictate who was considered "cool" enough or not "cool" enough? who are they to discriminate?

funny how humans are such judgmental creatures. funny how humans discriminate and make others feel inferior. funny how humans think they have the right to hold prejudices. did god appear in their dreams one night and told them they are superior?

the thing is, everyone had felt discriminated in some way or other, however big or small the extent in their lives. did people stop to think how they had felt, might be the way that the people they are treating unkindly are feeling? gender, age, race, ethnicity, colour, beliefs, sexuality, and the list obviously goes on. that is one thing i've learnt. everyone has been through some sort of difficulty in life.
"if you could only know each person's history, you would give each person a kind smile"

i am not perfect. i am not saying i have never judged or i have never discriminated or i have never held prejudices. what i am saying is that i have seen enough of life and met enough of people to know that you should never assume you are better than any other person next to you. so what if you are taller, richer, more attractive, better dressed than the person next to you? can you truly say that you are kinder, more compassionate, smarter (not necessary in academic sense) than they are? you could be inferior in so many ways. have you been through what they have been through? have you seen the world through their eyes? i am trying every day to stop judging, to stop discriminating, to stop holding prejudices. and it could be a long process.

sometimes, everyone is a fool at heart.

le scaphandre et le papillon

it's mid october. in exactly one month's time, i'll be completely done with this sem in uni. phew! it wasn't difficult. it wasn't overly-taxing afterall. i had heaps of fun. never a dry weekend or weekday, for that matter, yet. but i should next weekend. *cross my fingers* spanish exam and essay due tmr. spanish presentation on tues. food anthropolgy 4000 word essay due next week. state of the world 5000 word essay due the following week. and the big final spanish exam after after. rawh.

captures of the past 2 weeks or so...

puzzle with a piece missing.

i am researching for my spanish presentation. i decided to talk about puno. a city i visited when i was volunteering in peru.
so i was looking through my journal for inspiration as well as to refresh my memory. and oh god. i miss peru and the random people i met and the friends i made. the kindness i received. i wish i could go there again.
but i know i should discover new places as well. experience new things.
so i reckon aiesec exchange seem like a good choice after all.
mrb interview on wed night.
wish me luck!

on a day like today.

so there are downfalls and then there are the picking-ups.

found out 2 days ago that the sg internship with siia that i was promised with didn't fall through.
hence, my summer plans are in disarray.
i've got options. plan Bs and Cs.
i could volunteer through AIESEC somewhere around the world. fit in some traveling with that perhaps.
or i could try to join lentilasanything and stay in melb for summer.
or i could bum my summer away AGAIN and go see my very-missed friends.
so? talk senses to me!

yesterday i started being vegetarian. yes yes, you read that right, my dear.
today is day two. and please don't think it's some diet or attempt at losing weight. cus i know more than two vegetarians who are NOT SKINNY and they have been vegetarians most of their lives. if any of you losers out there wanna lose weight, try going carb-free. trust me, me being a vegetarian means eating more carbs!
but the reason for this, it's a challenge. i have never ever in my entire life attempted being a vegetarian. i wanna see how long i can last. determination. not giving up. and personal test, if you are really interested. so there. next time, i can say, "i tried being a vegetarian but i can't last", if i fail. at least i experienced it and know how it feels like to resist temptations of fried chicken. lol.

and then, there was the initial scare last night. i checked my grades for the food anthropology class. it read 336%. wtf. my tutor said 13% failed their essays. so i assumed she did a typo for 33.6%. honestly, i was.."oh god. what did i do wrong?". anw it turned out to be unjustified frettings cus today, my essay was returned and i received 84%. (:

talk about roller-coaster rides, eh?

higher.

I'm glad you came around today
I sure need a good companion
I'm losing it but you're the same
without you I move at random
Abusing you 'cause you're a friend
and there's no Jesus here to explain
come take me high above our time
We'll make it out of here
You justify, you're not afraid
and I won't feel like this forever
You wait with me, because you know
there's so much more than this before we go
- the cardigans.