it's over..

ahhh..alevels is finally over (: well..the funny thing is after the last paper i didn't have any feelings. maybe i was numb already. or perhaps i already started going out since last friday. hmmm..watever it is i'm glad i dun have to spend my days mugging for the next couple of months! hehee. but now i'm so busy trying to pack up my room! still have to pack my clothes and i dun seem to be able to fit everything into my bags and boxes! i have too much stuff AND my bag for kl/rd trip is freaking heavy lar..how am i gonna drag across the whole msia with me?!?!?! maybe i should take out some clothes..but i dun wanna be wearing the same things over and over again next month! grrrr..nvm nvm.

yesterday rah gave me a gorgeous scrapbook she made! it's my bday present. very belated but i can see y it is cus it's so beautiful! she put so much effort into it!!! how did u find the time to study my dear? and i love it sooo much!!!! it's pretty x100. it has tons of pics of our kayak days together and funny captions too. pics of our crashing over kayakers place etc. it used to be so fun during our season. hehe. many fond memories (: the book had handwritten song lyrics and a long note to ME! omg..i love it so much! thanx rah! (:

we had our very last class outing yesterday too. well..not the whole class..it was only like the 8 of us?? the rest went off to mugg their s papers?!?!?! yeah or some went to sitex at expo. oh well..who cares? we still had fun. crapped a great deal at long johns!! hehe. and yessshh..i AM gonna miss the bunch of them..all the bitching, toiling pw together, pulling thru alevels, attending/ponning lects or tuts, ponning lects for swensen's ice cream at parkway, making fun of each other etc. etc. we all gotta meet up again when i'm back..perhaps next year!!!

pixels and shutter

pixels and shutter. dun ever got to that shop in sim lim square cus they're all out to cheat ppl. i was there today and ended up so fucking frustrated cus he kept jacking up agreed prices for the cam i wanted. like wat the fuck? it was 336 then he brought it up to 357 with the excuse that he added the 5% gst wrongly and when i used his calculator to sum up the price..it was only 347.. then i questioned him and he said..oh the extra money is for warranty..FUCK u lar..whot he hell pays for warranty? do i look stupid? yujun ended up being so pissed as well.. and we were both so damn frustrated. anyway i decided not to buy the cam in the end cus i dun wanna patronise these kinda shops who try to con me!

i feel like taking down the shops unit no and write to the straits times to complain and ask if there is any ministry or govt body who controls these kinda cheats and conmen. and i also feel like going back to the store and make a big hoo-ha. i wanna drag a fren to pretend to look for a cam there and after a few minutes..exclaim loudly to my fren as well as any potential customers in the shop.."OMG! this is the shop that tried to cheat me. no no..u (to my fren) shouldn't buy anything from here. they are very mean and tried to con me..plus they make me so frustrated that i cried (then pretend to cry and act damn pitiful)." i'm sure all potential customers in the shop will be wary of them after that. then i'm gonna stand outside the shop and exclaim the same thing about wat conmen they are and hope that passerbys who may be potential customers will overhear. hmmph. the shop owner would probably scold some vulgarities at me but who cares? i can take that opportunity to make an even bigger scene and make them lose business. hah!

i'm so dumb sometimes.

met up with flo and audrey and adrian + gf last night to celebrate audrey's birthday. yeah...quite good to finally meet up with them.. lotsa catching up!! it was fun and i pigged out like siao..went to california pizza kitchen at forum. yeah we had pizza..(what's the name again ah? erm..start with j wan lar..) damn good wei!! then we had this kang pua spaghetti..super good! it had prawns and groundnuts..yummy! later we went to indulge in desserts at nydc! had 3 elephancinnos and a lemon shiver..the lemon shiver rocks lar! plus the mushroom pizza (to die for!) and cookie monster mudpie + grandma goes nuts mudpie!!!!! tell me i'm gonna grow fat! but i'm still happy (: i love good food. can't wait for the road trip..assam laksa!!

p/s: since my pretty guess heels sold out b4 i got it, i went to buy a zara skirt to make up for it. i think it's damn gorgeous (: it's more for autumn wear though..since this is the fall/winter collection..well i'm planning in advance for adelaide next yr..cus when i get there in july..it's winter!

til kingdom come

Steal my heart and hold my tongue.
I feel my time, my time has come.
Let me in, unlock the door.
I've never felt this way before.

The wheels just keep on turning,
The drummer begins to drum,
I don't know which way I'm going,
I don't know which way I've come.

Hold my hand inside your hands,
I need someone who understands.
I need someone, someone who hears,
For you, I've waited all these years.

For you, I'd wait 'til kingdom come.
Until my day, my day is done.
And say you'll come, and set me free,
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.

In your tears and in your blood,
In your fire and in your flood,
I hear you laugh, I heard you say,
"I wouldn't change a single thing."

The wheels just keep on turning,
The drummers begin to drum,
I don't know which way I'm going,
I don't know what I've become.

For you, I'd wait 'til kingdom come,
Until my days, my days are done.
Say you'll come and set me free,
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.

-coldplay, til kingdom come..

i should have crossed the bridge.

really really?

Your Birthdate: September 27

You are a spiritual soul - a person who tries to find meaning in everything. You spend a good amount of time meditating, trying to figure out life. Helping others is also important to you. You enjoy social activities with that goal. You are very generous and giving. Yet you expect very little in return. Your strength: Getting along with anyone and everyone Your weakness: Needing a good amount of downtime to recharge Your power color: Cobalt blue Your power symbol: Dove Your power month: September

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

I WANT! ooh damn gorgeous rite? and it's on sale! whee..should i get it?

2 more.

i dun have maths/chem/phy for the rest of my life. 2 more papers to go. bio3 and bio1. it's annoying how bio2 was the very first paper and bio1 is the very last because the content for both is the same! i can't rmb what i studied for bio2 anymore.haihz... bio3 is an entirely different content..growth and reproduction which i haven't touched yet. i'm planning to later tonight..after i finish packing another box. planning to send some boxes to my aunt's place tmr cus i can't possibly move 5boxes + 3 luggage bags at the same time! yeah..hopefully my aunt's house has space to store all my junk. i hope bio would be easy. chem1 today was pretty horrid..perhaps cus i didn't really study for it. i'm so tired of reading my notes and practising the tys. bleargh. but it's only 6 more days. soo...it'll fly by quite fast (:

maybe i should put in more effort since this IS the last lap. oh well. we'll see. i have a rough idea wat grades i'm gonna get. as in when u do the paper, u definitely would know where u stand. u can tell if it's a B or C or D standard. yupz.

enough bout exams! *yawnz* i should get back to packing! nvr knew i had so much junk. and how dusty and dirty they are..eew!

after..

3 more papers! and my post alevels plans are already..well...it's already well-planned! (: here's a rough guide if any of u are interested to know or interested to join me (haha) :

24th- last paper..bio 1! probably going out with char and carol? am i? dunno lar..if i can finish packing! hahaaa..or prolly force the class to go out for one last lunch or something. hehe. then at night i'm clubbing with carol! char claims she's fat and refuses to join us..hmmph..i'll abandon her in kl zouk! haha jk jk.

25th- bring all my boxes with stuff to aunt's place..(who wants to help me carry heavy boxes of my junk?) then dinner with the sticks (: off for the road trip after that..shooting off to penang at 930pm (who wants to send me off?)

26th- penang! penang! the FOOD! yummmmieeeeee..

27th- ipoh! crashing teikzhen's place..haha!

28th- KL!!! (: guess where we're staying?!? 5-star park royal!! right smack downtown! how freaking cool is that? we got some discounted cheap rate too..rm140++ per night..

29th- malacca! crashing ngeezheng's place this time

30th- back to kl while the rest goes back to s'pore. cy's party at velvet underground! wheee...so excited! everyone's gonna be there..can't wait to catch with my darls (:

hmmm...that's the plan for the week! (: can't wait! can't wait! oh yeah..will be back to s'pore on 23rd tentatively if nothing crops up!

thank you.

so, when i leave next june, i would miss this place actually..my 4 yrs ere..the familiarity of the surroundings, the ppl i've met esp liz, nic and ser. i would miss all the great frens i made in scgs and cjch..there was a transition..a big transition of my life then..the other scholars in cjch really helped me pull thru and move on with life..poi, chuifen, jo, wanxin, sherene, kienji, teikzhen, minghui, yeekiat and maybe ben. and for all that they have done for me and their irreplaceable friendships, i would be eternally grateful. i will nvr forget them and the great, amazing times we shared. growing up and learning to be independent and deal with life. the ppl i hung onto for support and guidance. the ppl who stumbled and fell with me. the ppl who helped me up. the ppl who chided me for my mistakes after i made them even when they knew beforehand i would make them..the ppl who allowed me to learn from my own mistakes. the ppl who accepted me for who i am..my flaws and all. the ppl who were not too quick to judge my actions. the ppl who lent me a shoulder to cry on and a listening ear. thank you.

wants..

i always have a lot in mind to say in this blog when i'm studying but everytime the internet connection will be bad as well. isshh. and when i finally can get online, i forget what i wanted to say. bleargh.

pretty excited for post-alevels plans. the road trip. cy's party. kl. work. holidays. watever lar. just can't wait for this to end. i can't mug too. my attention SPAN is darn short. i'm so easily distracted!

the topic of wants crept into my thoughts recently cuz of..well something. yeah..so everyone has their own wants right? their own expectations. for me, i learnt to deal with not getting wat i want and compromising the situation so that in the end, i'll make do with second best. the thing is, i used to have the drive to study..to put in effort in school..but i lost all that a 2yrs ago. it's not that i was in bad company or distracted by social activities or wateva. but it's just that i learnt that u can't always be no.1. u dun have to be the best to be happy. u dun have to have everything.

i may not get all the love in the world but at least i've got great friends who shower enough love on me. a simple call from jo. meeting up with the sticks in town or crashing over one of their places. receiving an sms from poi or chuifen. when cy/em/ef comes to s'pore to visit. dinner with the ex-cjch guys. anything at all. it does mean alot to me. at least i know that they are still around. simple everyday hellos and how r yous?

and...sometimes i dunno if u r really sincere or actually give a damn at all. izzit cus i'm going away next yr to aust that u dun think we should be close anymore? u only want to hang out with ppl who will be ere for u for a few more yrs? u only want ppl to fuss around and since i won't be around in the next few months..there's no point trying to mantain our friendship? if that is it, u r fucking self-centred. if u were a true friend, u would appreciate the time we have left and just let loose and have fun. friendships do last btw. just so u know, even across oceans and continents. but perhaps, our friendship hasn't reached that level yet. in any case, i just hope u know what u r doing.

everywhere else but here

one of my roommate's hamster died yesterday. i watched it die. it was quite traumatising. and all these years i had been wishing that i was there....then it hit me yesterday, as i watched that hammie die that i would have nvr been able to pull thru all this shit if i had been there. u get wat i'm trying to say? if not..then ignore it lar..

on another note: if i'm right and pls pls correct me if i'm wrong, it's been a disappointment. i tot better of u.

..i'm looking forward to next year..working and earning my own money.. buying what i want..going where i want..go for holidays..dive. can't wait. i wanna take spanish lessons too..wanna go for student exchange also..so many things i wanna do. all of this in 3 weeks. it's fast.

and so...

And so it finally ends. Just like that huh? This supposed "torture" for 2 yrs. All the dread and stress. I've gotta admit it was a pretty long 2 yrs...but now that I can actually see the end of this journey, it seems that time really did fly by and now I realized that I haven't got enough time to fulfill certain things. Ten yrs down the road and I know I'll be fondly remembering the good times only..the bad will probably seem insignificant. I'll probably rmb kayak and the team cus they were sucha huge part of my vj life. The really sad thing is tt we all drifted apart after our season ended. We seldom or almost nvr hang out together anymore..did anyone realize that? We used to at least 4 times a week..but I supposed it's expected since we had trainings about 4 times a week then and right after our season, we had exams and exams so we had no time for one another. I suppose I'll regret this many, many yrs down the road..not reinforcing our friendships enough..not cementing a strong base for a lasting friendship. Maybe we should have one last outing..a chalet or something..b4 everyone part ways.