tonight.

i guess i forgot that feeling.
new people, new places.
and now i know that i have to leave,
you, and you, and you,
everything behind.
just because i just have to.
i'm sorry that i'm finally ready.

late night...

another tss wedding.
and it brings all of us together.
7 continents. 50 over countries.
we got it right.
and we'll hang on to this.
this connection.

zero the controls.

struggle for social distinction happens in every field, scenario, space.
it is a tireless competition for power and merit.
legitimation for the ego.
this incessant need for more and better,
is not the end point i want to be.
that is not what i want to look forward to for the rest of my days.

please don't suck me into those controls.

the hole in your roof.

it feels strangely comforting to see people moving on
watching them rise above the fall
aiming for something out there

'i love you.' for a start, we'd better put these words on a high shelf, in a square box behind glass which we have to break with our elbow, in the bank. we shouldn't leave them lying around the house like a tube of vitamin c. if the words come too easily to hand, we'll use them without thought; we won't be able to resist. oh, we say we won't, but we will. we'll get drunk, or lonely, or - likeliest of all - plain damn hopeful, and there are the words gone, used up, grubbied. we think we might be in love and we're trying out the words to see if they're appropriate? how can we know what we think till we hear what we say? come off it; that won't wash. these are grand words; we must make sure we deserve them. listen to them again: 'i love you'... how serious, how weighted, how freighted it sounds.
- Parenthesis, Julian Barnes

strawberry fields forever.

week-long birthdays are the best.
my fav afro-boy presence.
beer sausages and pork knuckles on thurs.
lotus lounge and supermild.
raya dinner on fri.
footy and the bbq at kurralta with the best couple,
dj in the kitchen, good music, good lollies on sat.
vodka bar through the back entrance.
barossa winery on sun.
indian food for dinner.

everyday in transit.
i'm ready now.

this is it.

he said,
"you are, so far, the only person i have met who i could spend my life with...
but there is this tinkle of love at first sight
and i don't wanna hurt you...
i love you and i mean it in all sense of the word"

or something like that.

tomorrow comes.

how does one get someone out of one's head?


my breaking back. five work shifts in six days. money is good though; but what can money really buy?


everyone wants a party. but honey, i have no spare time. and sometimes, it is fun to have a night in, instead.



three thoughts in my head, disconnected from one.