Life is a blessing...

It is amazing what a person can experience in this life and survive.  The sheer pain and heartache.  The trial of a passing loved one is acute and real.  I honestly don't know how people survive it.  In one week there has been many funerals.  Each different and unique in their own way and each so hard.  However, from all the sadness and tears I have learned one valuable lesson...life is precious and it is a gift.

The first funeral I attended was that of my Great Uncle Grant.  Although I remember his presence in my childhood, I am afraid there is little interaction I have had with him in my adult years.  But much like my Grandparents he was truly great and lived a magnificent life and left a great legacy behind.  He was 92 years old.  He was in a great deal of pain and at 6' 1" he weighed in at a whopping 80 pounds.  Although death is never a happy joyous occasion, this death was a welcomed ending to a long life and a beginning of an eternal life with many joyous reunions to be made.

The second funeral I attended was the funeral of my cousin.  Stacy Herbert Sheffield was the life of the party.  She was a magnet and everyone in the room wanted to be near her and involved in her conversation because she was sure to bring laughs.  Not only was she funny but she was real.  She never faked anything.  Hugs and kisses were a greeting given to all whom she encountered.  She left this world unexpectedly leaving behind 5 children.  I have never seen such heartache or heard such anguish as I witnessed the pain of her children saying their last goodbyes to their mother.  It was a painful passing.  I look at her children and my heart aches for them.  Each phase they embark on, how will they make it without this red-headed fireball encouraging them through it.

The third funeral I attended this week was that of my 3 year old neighbor's daughter.  She drowned while on vacation.  I look at this family and their remaining 4 children and I wonder how they are going to survive this loss.  There will never be a day that goes by when she is not thought of.  How will they pack up this child's belongings?  How will they walk past her room?  How will they be able to pick up where they left of?  Never again will their lives be the same. This heartache is so painful for me to even think about, how can they live it?

With each one of these experiences I have learned a great deal about my own life.  I know that life is truly a gift from God, one He can take away when He needs me to fulfill another mission in heaven.  I never hurt for those that have passed and moved on, for that is exactly what they have done, they have moved forward beginning another phase of their eternal progression.  We don't die to sit on a cloud and play a harp.  When we die we have a new kind of existence in our post-mortal life.  We are teaching, we are learning, we are ever increasing.  Becoming more than we are today.  My hurt goes to those that are left behind.  The loneliness they feel until they meet again in heaven.

I am grateful I am here at this time, living in Utah, being around family.  Family is everything to me and I am grateful that I get to be here to perfect those relationships.  I am so grateful for my time living away, and abroad and the wonderful people and experiences I have had.  But as I have learned painfully this week that life is precious and we need to spend it with the people we love most.  Every moment counts.  But I am especially grateful that those relationships don't end with death.  We are eternal families and that is truly the greatest gift of all.

Life's small blessings

I love this picture of me and Harvey. Taken in the Dominican Republic, you couldn't find two people more relaxed. In this type of environment any marriage can survive.

However, shortly after our arrival home from this trip, the storm hit...

Harvey came home one day early from work. Harvey being home early, I knew this couldn't be a good thing. He informed me that he had been laid off at work. Although we knew it was happening with other employees at work we were quite surprised it happened to us. The surprised not only being in the lay off but how it was conducted. The following day Harvey was heading to Virginia to retrieve all our belongings. We were officially moving to Utah for no reason. At least we thought...

While Harvey was in VA we have never experienced such torn feelings before. As I spoke with all my VA friends and bawled with them on the phone, all I wanted was to pack up the kids and join Harvey in Virginia. Everything that initially made us uproot our family, leave our home and best friends was no longer and all I wanted to do was run back. My heart was broken...that was until the blessings started to pour in.

It started when I was having the toughest day of all and so desperately wanting to return to my home in Virginia my mom walked through the door after her day at work. At seeing her face I instantly felt at peace. Although friends have been our family for the last 14 years it was now as I was in the presence of my mom that I was reminded of all those times I missed her. All those times I was so homesick to be with my family, with my sisters and those feelings of loss were over-ridden with a feeling of comfort and peace. I was finally with my family. The reason for moving to Utah had nothing to do with a job; it was all about family.

The days haven't gotten any easier and the trials haven't loosened up but either have the blessings.

Harvey and I have taken the opportunity of visiting the LDS temple and while there we were given clear direction, peace, and reminded to have the proper perspective. This is life, and we can overcome the obstacles.

Feeling empowered by the small but significant blessings I know that this it what life is about. In this type of environment when all the trials of life can seem overwhelming, this is when a marriage can truly be put to the test.

But as I look at my husband I look at him with admiration. He is faithful and he is strong. Among my many blessings I count him as the greatest. And with all this said, I add a big HAPPY BIRTHDAY HARVEY! I love you.