Thank you, everyone.

2008 had been such a dramatic year for me.

I had joy. I had tears.

I entered with hopes.

I left with priceless experience of growing up.

January 2008. I left my home for Taylor's, with certain degree of anxiety, nonetheless, had all the positive hopes in the world. I moved in to 131F, not only with almost all of my belongings, but also dreams, believing that I was going to be a happy COLLEGE STUDENT, believing in near future, I'd be one of those who enter their dream universities, with a bright future ahead...

And then, the reality struck hard on my face. It wasn't easy. I couldn't really fit into my class. They were nice, but I just couldn't 'blend' well enough to feel comfortable. And my studies was so awful. Terribly, unbelievably, bad. And I decided to give up Physics. Still, my other subjects weren't satisfactory.

Luckily, I met 3 wonderful housemates, Shir Ying, Tee Yong and Elizabeth, there. I might not be very comfortable in class, but the four of us in 131F seemed to have all the fun in the world, all the things to chat about. Everything we shared is safely kept here deeply in my heart.

Besides that, I appreciate Chee Yuen, Zi Yang and Poh Yuan for being my friends in class very much! Although sometimes I felt a bit awkward sitting with these 3 guys in almost all classes, but they were really nice friends to me. I won't forget the fun we had when we played table tennis after school! And also special thanks to Kai Chi and Betsy, who were nice friends to me in Taylor's.

Then, my SPM result came out. Honestly, I was over the moon when I heard about it. I really, seriously thought I couldn't make it. I can't describe how thankful am I that luck was on my side. Sometimes I really wonder how come I was so lucky in UPSR, PMR and SPM... Since I had always wanted to do medicine but worried about the fees, I tried my luck once again by applying for JPA medicine. THIS,was the turning point, almost the climax, which lead me to where I am this moment.

Luck (or whatever/whoever that determines fate in this world) took care of me well. I was lucky for once more. I was so thrilled when I knew I was chosen by JPA to do the medicine course! But that didn't last for too long. I was overwhelmed by sadness for leaving my precious housemates there. Finally I overcame my homesickness and found happiness in Taylor's, but it was also time to leave. No matter how reluctant I was, I had no choice but to enter KTT, because I knew it's the chance of a lifetime. I couldn't let this chance go.

July 2008. Once again, bringing almost all my belongings (again), I entered college, but this time with an entirely different mood. I didn't hope for anything. I felt like my college life had ended. I went with thoughts like 'I'm here because I have to', 'I'm here for an ultimate goal-medicine', 'one year! just one year then I'll be gone from this place!!!' etc. and, very sorry to say (I'm really sorry!), I wasn't in the slightest mood to make friends.

So, I began my life of no life in KTT. Books, books and books. And books. And books. And MORE books. I can't remember being so depressed anytime else. I was worried because I felt inferior in class. I was worried because I was constantly thinking: what if my result is lousy? Everyone else was so good. Everyone but me. I had no friends to talk to. I didn't know who cared to listen. I didn't know who cared to help. I didn't know who would listen to my problems without JUDGING me as someone... weak (although this is actually the truth.. I always know I'm not one of the strong ones... right). I knew my whole family were behind me. I knew I had (mental) support from old friends... but I felt as if I was all alone. Things got worse during AS. It was so bad that I thought it was going out of control. Funny how weak minds work...

Well, it was over anyway. Looking back, I feel so sorry for making my family worried about me, especially my parents and brother. I don't know what would have become to me without they all. Their patience and love to me was extraordinary. And my cousin Sheay, so sorry to disturb you with my silly problems when you're always busy for your work. And all my aunties, uncles and grandparents, who tried to help me with their kind words and support. I owe them so much. And cousin Qin. Although we couldn't talk much after you went to Hong Kong, but I'm so grateful that you were willing to talk to me on Skype even though your stress was probably a few times greater compared to mine. I was silly for making such a fuss... I hope I did learn something from this painful experience. I hope I'm stronger than I was. I know I must learn to be.

As I said in my older post, KTT was somehow different for me after AS. To be exact, I started to look at KTT a different way. I'm not going to lie and say that I don't feel stressed around my good-at-everything classmates (,roommate and housemates). Because the truth is, I still do. I'm still fully aware that I feel inferior. I know that challenges ahead are going to be tougher than it was. However, I've realised that they're nice friends, especially the one who asked me 'are you okay' in the library during AS (I was surprised she could even realise I wasn't okay, haha), and the one who asked me 'are you okay' for COUNTLESS times when I was sick and reckoned I am more cheerful these days, and EVERYONE else who gave me support, shared their joy in everyday life. Please forgive me if I prefer to keep to myself when I have problems. I may not be very caring and I seldom show my concern (hehe), but please believe that I appreciate you as I appreciate all my friends!

Last, but not least *ahem*, my old friends from SAB - Hui Jie, Su Jia, Shi Hwee, Caryn, Kai Xin etc... I wasn't confident about keeping in touch, but I was so wrong! We still share our happiness and worries whenever there's a chance. I hope we'll keep this friendship alive =) !

Frankly, how can I be so lucky that I have all of you in my life?! =D

Through my experience in 2008, I've learnt that what you expect might never come, and whatever comes is normally something you've never expected, and very often, in such a creative way you wouldn't have thought of at all! Maybe that's what people call "the beauty of the unexpected"?

I probably won't be the same when I write another 'summary' for 2009 next year, but I'll try my best to make sure by that time, I'm a better me than I am at this moment.

With this, I declare the start of the odyssey.

Old friends gathering

Today my secondary school friends and I had another gathering. This has somehow become our 'tradition' after we left SAB. I think that's what we should do - appreciate chances to meet with old friends before we all part and go to different countries around the world, then it'll be very difficult to meet up.

We usually meet in Wetex (the only decent shopping mall for youngsters in Muar, haha), but today we changed our venue to 老地方, a place people go to yam cha. There were only 7 of us- su jia, shi hwee, kai xin, pei fen, wei fen, ying han and me. Too bad poor Caryn is stuck in Penang because she doesn't have a holiday! But never mind, haha, because she called using 3G and we were still able to see her face.

Wei Fen, me and Pei Fen
(standing) Kai Xin

Ying Han, Shi Hwee, Su Jia

Season's Greetings

Different

Life at KTT after AS has been a bit different for me. It's probably because of the way I looked at everything. I know I had been shutting myself away and for reasons which I myself cannot fully comprehend, I refused to make a real effort in making good friends... (note the past tense...). Doesn't it sound silly? I'd known that they were nice people all along, but I was too worried about something else. Something I refused to share. To be honest, I felt touched when I was still involved in their activities when I had been keeping them at arm's length for the past 5 months...

Anyway, let's not talk about this sentimental topic now, haha, I'm here to report what I've been doing in KTT, besides studying.

Hm... we went to Seremban to watch a movie called "The Day The Earth Stood Still". The movie wasn't very nice, but for me, what was important was a trip out of KTT, haha, and according to them, "merapatkan hubungan" among friends. The shopping centres were decorated for Christmas. Even though it wasn't as nice as those in KL, but it was already a treat to feel some festive atmosphere. After the movie, we went to play bowling! That was the second time I played but my skills didn't improve at all...

Oh yeah, and there was another event which I forgot to write here -- Adeline's birthday. My housemates Reena and Maddy, and Mimi blindfolded her (while I sat in the car looking, hehe), then we sent her to Secret Recipe, where we met the guys and celebrated her birthday as a surprise. I was terribly full from the cake and the spaghetti after that >.<. I enjoyed it even though it wasn't my birthday, haha, and I'm glad I could be part of my roommate's birthday celebration.

(top, from left) Hong Yih, Ming Li, Ken Joo, Maddy, me and Adeline
(bottom, from left) Krishan, Vincent, Ian, Mimi and Reena

Another event would be the Christmas celebration organised by the Christian Fellowship. Normally I would prefer to be... anti social(as usual?), but I guess there was no harm taking part once in a while, so to everyone's surprise @_@, I turned up for the celebration. And I know it was a right decision.

The choir singing Christmas carols

We also had our Tang Yuan on last Sunday. Since most of us didn't go back to hometown, they decided to have our own Winter Solstice 'reunion' instead. Here's the photo...


There was also a small farewell party for our Chemistry lecturer Puan Hana.


Now here I am, in my cozy bedroom in Muar enjoying my peaceful Chrsitmas Eve. It is indeed very 'peaceful' because I have no activities planned... but I don't mind at all! Afterall, where else is better than home sweet home? =D

Wedding

Yep, it was the first wedding in my family (i mean, my generation in my family, hehe) yesterday. So we had been a bit busy, but definitely not as busy as the bridegroom's parents and siblings, haha. Since we all lived so close together, of course it was very convenient and we were very excited to help, haha.

[the details are too long and a bit complicated as well to explain here]

We had the wedding feast at Star Restaurant at night. I didn't have time to take many photos as I was helping to usher guests to their seats.

balloons of different colours to categorize the guests

Cameron Highlands

I think the last time me and my family went for holiday was 2 or 3 years ago... This time, during my precious (pitifully short) holiday, we went to Cameron Highlands! It wasn't exactly somewhere you go for 'fun'. But it was really relaxing. In fact, I don't mind it being short of 'fun'. No matter where it is, being on a holiday with family is already something priceless.

One of my favourite activities there would be photo taking. I'm far from being skillful in it, but I still find it interesting. Besides, I finally have a big chance of making use of my birthday present which mum and Sheay gave me - a digital camera. The resort we lived in was kind of good. I like the buildings, though it's not that new.

It was raining everyday while we were in Cameron. This made the weather even cooler, especially in the morning and night. Luckily the rain wasn't heavy, so it didn't affect our trip much as we can still visit places there. Only that the rain made me a bit worried about land slides...

The other enjoyable activity would be eating steam boat（or 'hot pot'? 火锅)! We had 2 kinds of, erm... 'hot pot' (?). One is shown below, the other was a special kind, mainly made of water crest (西洋菜) plus traditional ingredients, in a water crest farm.

火锅

the view from hotel, which is the highest located hotel in Cameron Highlands

flowers...

flowers by the road

a path in the hotel

It was an enjoyable trip although some say Cameron Highlands is a boring place. I say sometimes going to a quiet place is as good as going to a full-of-activity and exciting place. It's a different kind of holiday. None is better than the other.

New Trailer of Half-Blood Prince

An End, A Beginning

It's over! 6 weeks of tremendous amount of stress and endless studying... I've been wondering whether they meant to mental torture us by stretching the exam till 6 weeks although it's only 9 papers. It definitely wasn't a nice feeling, seeing the Indonesia bound students who had finished their last paper on Wednesday hanging around happily, went out for dinner and went to Genting for a trip on Thursday. I was getting more and more restless while waiting for our last paper, which was Physics Paper 1 to end...

Honestly, the past 6 weeks were an... extraordinary journey for me. I realised how vulnerable am I under pressure. I definitely didn't perform as well as I would under normal circumstances. While enjoying my holiday as much as I can, I'm mentally preparing myself to face the consequences. People would tell me not to worry because it'd turn out okay at the end, but I know it is not like that. What to do if my result turns out to be terrible? So terrible that... it might affect my chance of becoming a doctor? Well, I'll worry about it when the result comes out, which will be in next year.

Yesterday was a fine day. Physics Paper 1 was not bad (I wouldn't say I can get A for sure, but it was okay...), and as I walked from the exam hall back to my hostel, I was actually smiling all the way, haha. Then I started packing, and then did a bit of cleaning... Then, me and my family went to Melaka to eat CRABS! It's one of my favourite foods =). After that, we went to Mahkota Parade. I went straight to MPH and grabbed myself a few novels.

By the way, if you realise (I'm sure you do), I've changed my blog template! I suppose it's time for a new beginning. After many months of 'darkness', I guess it's time for something white, pure and clean. Besides, something white would match the coming season -- Christmas!

sometimes, what seems to be an end, is actually a new beginning

Can't it end faster?

I really hate this kind of feelings. I'm stressed. I feel guilty, anxious almost everyday! I just can't wait for the last paper to end, which is on the 21st of November.

My Bio paper 1 was a real blow. It's undoubtedly my favourite subject, but it is never my best. Or I should say, I seldom achieve a satisfactory result in Bio. BUT... it was never like the one I had on Thursday. I thought everyone felt the same with me. If everyone thought it was tough, then there's a high possibility that the threshold would be dropped and I would still stand a chance (though slim), to get an A for this paper. BUT, people told me it was easy. FINE! I can't do anything now, can I!? I'm stupid, ok??

Actually none of it went well completely...

I must admit... I don't have much confidence left in me. I went through the last 4 weeks miserably.

Sounds like I'm exaggerating? Never mind. I don't have much energy to convince you anyway.

在麻坡

不知道为什么，最近都选择用华文写（明知道英文已退步到了“惨不忍睹”的地步），呵呵。原本决定了这个周末留在ktt读书，哪里知道，那里就在星期四下午开始制水！反正我们到下星期四才考第二张paper，所以大多数人在当天下午就匆忙逃离“灾区”……嘿嘿，所以我也回麻坡咯……听说到今天还是一滴水也没有（除了雨水和水沟水）。不过无论如何，明天一早还是要回去的，只因为老师要教完早该在几个星期前就教完的课程……>.<"

想想那天我居然整个人跌进几乎有我肩膀那么深的水沟，半个身子都是黑黑的泥，也没伤到头，也算幸运了啦……虽然到今天背部还是在痛 =="，小腿也擦伤得像跌摩哆一样， 哈哈，就算是把霉运都用掉先吧，嘻嘻（歪理……）

那天考完了第一张，心情好像有了些变化……怎么说呢……就好像，最艰难的第一步已跨出了，好像也踏实了一点。哎……越想越烦的时候，也许最好的就是暂时什么都别想，哈哈……

终究还是会跨过去的，无论结果是如何。

害怕

真的很怕。很怕即将要来的挑战，更怕可能会来的失败。老实讲，我没有勇气接受这样的失败。

一想到长达六个星期的考试，就觉得很痛苦。虽然能有很多时间温习，却不难想象带着害怕和紧张度过六个星期的煎熬。

我当然一直在努力。可是努力了，却一点也没有心安的感觉，反而觉得很彷徨无助……很多人都想帮我，我知道。可是读书的是，我也谅解别人实在无能为力帮助我很多。而我自己，却总是有些力不从心的感觉……难道我的瓶颈就是这里？有深深的“恨铁不成钢”的感觉……

爸爸妈妈跟我讲了很多……可是我还在努力着实践……

What's going on?

I thought I was under pressure when I sat for SPM last year. Now I realised it was nothing compared to what I'm facing now. I know I shouldn't dwell on this but, the fact lingered in my mind -- this is the one which determines my life at least in the next 5 years.

I want to do as good as I ever can. But no matter what I do, I can't see my improvements. I still do silly mistakes in exams! And I'm still asking around for solutions because everyday I face a lot of questions which I can't solve. I'm doing as much exercise I could, but my result is not directly proportional to my effort. I feel my confidence dropping everytime they solve the questions for me, instead of me solving them myself!

What's worse, I can't stay calm in exams like I used to do. In secondary school, I felt sad when I couldn't do the questions in exams, I started to get nervous. BUT I'VE NEVER PANIC! But I DO NOW! I start to panic in the exams. I might not (consciously) feel nervous but I know my mind is no longer clear in exams. I always realise afterwards that I should had been able to do the questions in my 'normal' state. WHAT'S GOING ON?!?!?!

This is the one which decides whether I'll be sending you photos of bridges and castles in Czech or photos of... erm... (what do they have in Indonesia? Volcanoes?? Bali island maybe... ) or photos of Taj Mahal in India... OR WORSE, my cut off point is so low that I can't even fly... BUT I DON'T FEEL READY T_T

Holiday

Holidays!! Time passed too fast when I hope it goes slowly. It'd be Saturday in 1 hour and 30 minutes T.T

I've been relaxing too much this holiday... When I was in KTT I basically studied from morning till night, until I felt my joints all starting to rust (this is, er... biologically incorrect, but...). I always didn't have the mood to go 'hiking' or jogging with them... I barely had enough time to do enough exercises or enough time to read my notes!!!!! Especially after part of my trial result, which was heart-breaking, was announced.

Still, half of the stress seems to be gone at the moment I set my foot on beloved Muar, haha. I realised I'm not the kind who wants to be free as much as I expected myself to be. ==" I ended up playing badminton with my brothers almost EVERYDAY. I suspect this is a kind of 'revenge', haha, to make up the fun I lost in KTT? Alright, I know I CAN have fun there... but sometimes I feel like just shutting myself into my own world and do all the studing I could manage to do. Sometimes I had a bitter feeling that I wasn't there for friend-making or having fun... SOMETIMES. So it's no big deal... Another activity I have in Muar is shopping >.< Not that I have a lot of things to buy, haha... but I follow whenever my mum, aunt and cousin go out. Well, yesterday they managed to find me a... erm... dress, for my cousin Kun's wedding in November, which is coincidentally held during my holiday!!! According to them... everyone's supposed to be as pretty as possible on that day, haha, because it's the first wedding in our family (for my generation I mean)? I'm looking forward to it...

Ok... now I'm going to force myself to do some studying... I can't imagine how down and guilty will I feel when my classmates start to discuss how 'little' studying they have done in the holidays... (eg. "OMG! I've only done 5 books!!! Die la die la... ") ==" Anyway, this is purely my imagination... I'll let you know whether it comes true...

Bukit Tangki

Yesterday I went up the 'hill' for the first time after I came to KTT, with my 5 classmates. When we celebrated Mooncake festival, I only went half way as it started to rain. Actually it wasn't tiring at all, if you go by the 'normal' way (It's not even a real hill anyway). Some of my classmates actually CLIMBED via the rocky side of the hill sometimes. If you ask me, this is dangerous and irrational, I wouldn't risk breaking my legs or hands, or worse, neck, for climbing Bukit Tangki. Even though they weere trying their best to convince me that it was safe and exciting, but I'm the kind who appreciate my life a lot... haha. So yesterday we only walked, as I told them that if they were going to climb they could actually save their time for asking me to go with them. Once we were on the top, they all went to the edge of the hill and sat there. Some even started to climb down a bit, and sat half way of the 'hill'. One of them told me it was very nice, sitting on a rock and had his legs hanging in the air... >.<" They could have fallen if they just missed a step, or if one of the rocks they stepped on was loose... And even though it was not a real hill, it was still high above the ground, at least 10 stories high... Call me timid if you want, but I'd never try this without safety precautions...

looking down at KTT

air pollution... ==" (speaking of this, I suddenly miss the fresh air of Gunung Ledang we went to in form 4)

acting emo...

Moon Cake festival week *updated*

I know it's a few days pass Moon Cake festival already, but in fact, the celebration at KTT had just 'officially' ended yesterday. Yesterday the MPP (well, 'Student Council' would sound much better...) had an activity. Many students gathered and walked up the 'hill' with lanterns. I didn't go, because I found it quite... unnecessary, to celebrate Moon Cake Festival 4 times...

Haha, actually I didn't really celebrate. What I meant was I did something related to it. Last Saturday, my bro and I had accompanied our little brother Ze to walk with a lantern. He didn't play with it long anyway, I guess partly because he is now the only child in the family. It was far more interesting when we hung lanterns around the house and ate together like what we did 2 years ago. There was also once when we celebrated Moon Cake festival together with my brother Han's birthday. Well, that day we also visited the dogs with lantern, haha. Honey didn't bother about it at all, but Girl Girl was quite scared of it. She kept herself at a distance from the lantern, but kept staring at it, haha, and barked also. At last we gave up the lantern and played with Girl Girl (with the ball). So was it considered a celebration?

When I got back here on Sunday night, a few of my classmates and I gathered and lit lantern, ate some moon cakes... we also told the malay friends about our legends and origin of the festival. Haha, but then we realised none of us knew how come Wu Gang and Yu Tu were said to be on the moon... =="

On Tuesday, the day our last paper ended (I didn't do well, did silly mistakes AGAIN), we received a sms at around 9... asking all the CzechMed members to gather again at 10.45pm. This time, we ate (again), then, at almost 11.30pm, we walked up the 'hill'. If there weren't 25 of us, I guess the walk there could be really scary. There were 2 routes up the 'hill', but we decided to go via the main road, which was longer, because we heard that there were snakes along the shortest route. We didn't go near the tangki which was located on the highest place of the 'hill', because it was really really dark without the lampposts... so we stopped halfway (in front of a school which is located even more remote than KTT). There was nobody else there. So we chit chatted and played games like some mad people (because I think nobody sane except us would walk to such areas to talk and played...). Some of them actually sang aloud on the way up... luckily nobody was living there... we nearly decided to go up the 'tangki', which was really really dark, and then... it started to drizzle!! So we had no choice but to walk back before the rain became heavy... Haha, we heard that the seniors, who did the same thing one day before us, really had to run back because it started to rain... Anyway, when we got back it's 12+ already... almost 1am. Luckily the next day was a holiday.

the 'bukit tangki'

So, that was what we did for the week... some of them joined the activity last night, but most of us didn't. I'm trying to finish off the syllabus myself these few days, and the only thing left is Physics! The last chapter!! Haha... I'm rather happy with my progress... but I've only done the notes and reading... will proceed to exercise as soon as I finish the last chapter today... ^^

Not complaining

Great.

Honestly, when I first received the message about the class on tomorrow's 2pm, I was EXTREMELY irritated. I mean, extremely. It was a Friday. I was in the middle of my beautiful 'holiday', and I thought I still had 3 days of those peaceful days (days without seeing everyone studying like crazy), and a message came telling me I'd have to come back by Monday because we're going to have a class at 2pm on Monday.

I'm not complaining... do I have a reason to, anyway?

He's just being hard-working. And I happen to really need a hard-working Physics lecturer. And I happen to be stupid in Physics. And I happen to be a student who would feel guilty skipping class. And I happen to be someone who really needs good result. And I happen to be an A-Level student who's going to sit for the exam in 1 month's time.

So I'm here. Without a reason to complain.

I'm not complaining.

Self-declared Holiday

I went back to Muar on bus yesterday! Haha. We were actually having our trial exam since last week. Yesterday we had our Chemistry paper 1 ended at 12pm, then almost half of my class booked all the 12 seats of the van trip to KTM which was at 12.30pm, then off we went to our seld-declared holiday. I said it's 'self-declared' because others in KTT aren't having holidays except us. The papers which will be sitted on Thursday and Friday have nothing to do with us, plus Saturday and Sunday, we have 4 days of 'holidays'. Haha, AND, I have 5 days actually, because I've already passed the Malaysian Studies exam which they're going to sit for on Monday. Wahaha...

Chemistry practical on the first day of exam was a total DISASTER. We hardly had enough time to finish the experiments. I managed to get both experiments done in time. However, due to the fact that I was a bit panic by the end of it (and that they gave us the WRONG SOLUTION, and then had the solution changed half way, but only gave us 15 minutes extra time, and the experiment was really difficult), I read the WRONG reading from my correctly drawn graph! I was stupid enough to take the Y-axis to do my calculations instead of the X-axis. And, I didn't have time to really understand the principle behind the first experiment (I always need more time to understand chemistry...), I was simply following the instructions written there. >.< Biology practical wasn't that easy as well. We were supposed to draw a cartilage cell on a specimen of trachea, which, according to the instructions, were stained purple. But the only purple cells that could be clearly identified were the epithelial cell on the trachea wall... (I think they're ciliated epithelial cells but some said they couldn't see the cilia...). I ended up spending the last 40 minutes staring at the cells under the microscope. Well, I did see some tiny purple cells on the cartilage... but they're not so clear even if seen under the highest power... and they appeared so normal that the only thing I could label on my drawing was the nucleus... (we're not supposed to label cell surface membrane and cytoplasm because we SHOULDN'T be able to identify them using light microscope even though we know it's there...). It's supposed to be a 6-marks drawing! I'm sure we should label something else, but I really couldn't figure out... Except the disastrous Chemistry practical and the not-as-easy-as-ecpected Biolody practical, the others were fine. The Biology Paper 1 was quite challenging, but I don't mind learning new knowledge about Biology anyway, haha. Physics was easier than expected, the lecturer was being kind, haha... but I doubt the real exam would be that easy. Even if I get good results for Chemistry paper 1 and 2 this time, it doesn't prove anything because... I've done almost all of the questions (they're all past years questions) and I actually remembered the answers of 70% of them... Haha, one more thing... trial actually hasn't ended. We still have a Physics practical exam on next Tuesday...

Yesterday, after reaching home at 4+, I read newspapers, played with Girl Girl and Honey, played computer game, online... basically having a typical 'holiday'. Oh! Girl Girl gave me her 'hand' without me asking her to, haha... like a 'give me 5'. So cute. Too bad this kind of actions are hard to be captured with camera or handphone. Hehe, well... I guess today I should do a bit (a lot) of studying. Hopefully I can get my AS biolody done in this few days. I can't believe that, minus out the holidays and study week, the lecturers only have 1 week and 3 days to fnish their syllabus!! There should be no problem with Biolody, but Chemistry! And Physics!! We still have at least... 5 chapters to go... I'm going to see how they 'fly' (and I have to fly with them also >.<)

I Believe I Can Fly

Trial around the Corner

So what am I doing here?! T_T

Honestly, I don't feel that ready at all. I've been studying AS for 8 months, shouldn't I be more ready than my classmates, who have to absorb everything like a sponge and sit for the exam in 4 months time?

But I think I really really should stop complaining...

STOP COMPLAINING!

Anyway, it's only 1 YEAR!! *Sing: 'I will survive~~~'*

Going to study really really hard now, wish me good luck.

I need strength

This time after I go back to KTT I'll be stuck there for 3 weeks... next week we'll be having holiday on Monday due to the Hari Merdeka, but it's exactly before the trial started! >.< I want to come back Muar more than I did in Taylor's. Firstly because I could go to cousin's house when I was in Taylor's... Secondly,... *sigh*

I can't believe the trial is really coming... I don't feel ready! I'm SICK of studying... haiz...
But I have to. *pulling myself together*

Can I hate myself?

At first I was excited, and wanted to write about things happened in KTT. Then, my excitement wore out and what left was the desire to shut myself.

Ok, let's talk briefly about KTT. Hm... we had 'steamboat' on Sunday night, from 7.30pm till around 10.00pm. We were looking at the score of Olympic badminton final on internet while eating, feeling quite nervous. Yesterday I had KFC, because my housemate had a car and she happened to be going out to buy things, so we asked her to take away for us. What else? One of my classmates thinks I'm over stressing myself, and that all the stress I have actually comes from myself. But I reckon the others are giving me quite a considerable amount of it as well. And I'm kind of good at stressing myself already. So the total is devastating ==" I can't seem to get enough sleep, and I can never get enough study. If I sleep more I study less. If I study more I sleep less, and nearly drop off in the class.

...

I made a decision which makes me think I was just being emotional. But I knew I would make it again even if I were given a second chance. I hate it when my plan was obstructed, especially when it's something I've been looking forward to the whole week. I knew what was the reasonable solution, but I chose to stick with my plan.

I hate it. I hate myself when I'm easily disturbed by changes of condition. I hate myself for not being able to come to a decision without putting myself in a dilemma beforehand. I hate myself when I start to doubt my decision after I've decided. I hate myself for not being a decisive person. I hate myself for not being firm and steady.

星座分析

今天收到一个关于星座分析的电邮。虽然这种事我都是当娱乐一样看了就算，可是这篇……还真的非常有趣……准不准，就不知道啦，哈哈……

• 
  

魔羯座的人天生善良，感情也都很脆弱，也许会因为一些很小的事情难过很长时间，所以他们通常在表面表现的酷酷的与事隔离的样子，其实他们只是不希望让别人看到他脆弱的一面

魔羯相对任何星座来比能在最段时间看出一个人的性格无论他们在如何隐藏……但是他们通常不会说出来，也不会太介意

随着时间的积累魔羯的人在慢慢变坏，其实这也是一种自我保护，他们需要知道了解自己最后的一张王牌，做不做就看对方是否达到让魔羯抱负的地步了（哦……难怪有时候我比较喜欢戏里那些半好半坏的角色，哇哈哈……）

魔羯不会随便讨厌一个人，但是如果哪个人做的太过分，这个人会从魔羯心底彻底抹杀。

魔羯的报复手段极其残忍，他会加倍的还给你 *奸笑*


魔羯并不会随便的去加害一个人，因为魔羯也讨厌自己的坏

无论安全与不安全魔羯对朋友都很真，他们很珍惜些朋友。

他们最希望获得朋友的信任，如果从一个朋友那里得不到信任，他不会再与这个朋友交往下去。

他们了解身边的朋友的所有性格，所以他们在包容对方，就算你做了什么过分的事，他们也早就想考虑好如果对方为什么会这样做，最明显一点，你们可以去看看身边魔羯的朋友，无论你怎么做那些魔羯都不会很惊讶的，其实他们已经知道你为什么会这样了。

傻傻的魔羯一开始会认为，爱你是我自己的事情和你没关系，可是到后来越来越感觉不是滋味。

魔羯的人很善良，而且他们知道长痛不如短痛的道理……他们认为怜悯的爱对追求者来说是一种伤害

魔羯比任何一个星座对感情都很认真，恢复伤痕的时间也很长。

• 
  
  

O.o 我真的有那么阴险咩？？呵呵……

Story telling

Maybe we can't tell a story with only commas but no full stops. What do you do if you realise you're so breathless telling a story without full stops? You want to tell the greatest story ever. What if you realise you're actually the only one who cares? What if you notice nobody is listening to your story, or they listen just because they're being polite? You want it to be interesting forever, but you've become more and more tired, and the thought of giving up arises...

一个好的作者，是懂得在合适的时候写下句号的人。

P/S >.< This sounds like crap, haiz... I write because I feel that way, and I don't demand anyone to understand or agree, or care...

What I did

Went out with Caryn, Shi Hwee, Kai Xin, Ying Han and Wan Ling. We're all studying in different places now, but since it's their holiday, we went out and met. =) We met at Delikateza (not sure about the spelling, hehe) and chit chat. Silly talk, you know... haha... and about our new schools...After that, we went to our usual lepak spot until around 9.45pm. Really, it's nice to meet up once in a while like this, haha...

Home

In Muar. Relaxed. Chatting with 'long-lost' secondary school friends. Talking about our problems, our new life.

Been to some friends' blogs, and realised some are being emo just like me, haha... I wonder why? We're all in different places in Malaysia. Then, soon, we'll be in different places around the world! What used to be dreams, the topic of casual and hopeful conversation in classrooms during free periods, is now slowly becoming true, isn't it? Haha... I guess we're learning our ways in this new land... I suppose this should be something exciting, but it's not something as relaxing as we expected it to be...

Got my Chemistry and Biology paper, for mid-semester exam. Wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, but this is not a reason to be satisfied. What important is the actual exam. Sometimes I hope I have the power to see my future, to see whether I can go to Czech... haiz... Some say what beautiful about the future is the unpredictable... but I doubt I'd agree to this. I don't like the feeling of being uncertain about something...

Qin, my dear dear cousin, the cousin who forced me to play Barbie doll, who chatted with me till middle of night, who listened to my silly problems and allowed me to cry while telling her those, is going to Hong Kong! I'm so glad you're on your journey towards your dream. It's a pity that I can't meet you before you leave. When will be the next time we meet? Another 3 years? 5 years? 6 years? Haha... anyway... good luck. I know you can achieve your dream. I believe in it without a reason, because I don't need a reason to believe in you. =)

A Happy and Sad Day

T_T From now on I believe in miracles... I can online!!! I've been trying for so long. I wanted to online to write my blog, search for info and chat with Shir Ying and Eliz, but the line was so bad!! The most I could do was giving them a nudge or say 'hi', then disconnected. *sob*

Last weekend, 10th August, was (one of) the happiest and saddest days for me. I went to Taylor's to find Eliz and Shir Ying! (Once again, Tee Yong was absent... >.<") Thanks to Hong Yi, who went to Taylor's to find his friends. This gave me a chance to follow because I don't think I would go alone, especially this was the first time and the journey wasn't that direct... For the whole week I felt excited about this and was looking forward to it very impatiently, haha... I got up 7.30 in the morning, getting ready for the 8.30 am van to Nilai KTM station. BUT!!! BUT.... the driver was late by 1 hour and 15 minutes!!!!!! In the end, it was ANOTHER driver who fetch us at around 9.45am because the driver who was on shift never turned up!!! *angry* He robbed away 1 hour and 15 minutes of precious time for me to be with them! Ok, then when we arrived at the KTM station, we received another 'blow'. The queue was soooooooooo long! By the time I got on the KTM was already 10.20am. OK, fine... at least I got on the train... then we arrived at KL Sentral, then interchanged to another line of KTM, and I finally arrived at Subang KTM Station at 12.00pm. *tears of joy* Then I arrived at my 'ex-hostel'!!! Wahahaha.... then Shir Ying ........................... (in order to protect her public image, the details shall not be revealed here, =D). Compared to her, Eliz was relatively normal, haha... After a while, Kai Chi also came to join us, then we went to Sunway Pyramid by taxi. We had our lunch at Kim Gary and took a lot of photos. We must had looked crazy from other customers' point of view, hehe, but who cares~~~ then both Shir Ying and Eliz bought somethings while I was doing my window shopping, haha. After that, we went to the arcade centre for some shooting game and racing game, both I've played before in Genting... (bad girl bad girl, hehe) I knew Shir Ying noticed I was looking at my watch frequently and seemed to be less talkative (according to her, who in fact, is always the most talkative one), but it wasn't because I wanted to go! Haiz... I just wanted to know how much time we left. I knew 4 hours would pass very very fast... Sorry la... if I spoiled your mood by being slightly down and stressed even when I'm supposed to be having fun with you all... At around 4.45pm, we met with Hong Yi and his friends in Sunway. It was time for me to go because we need to rush for the 6.30 KTT van which was much cheaper than taxi. *sob sob*. Haiz... Haiz... what can I do? I can't do anything to change the reality... When I could finally online, I went to check Shir Ying's blog, and saw that she's written a touching post about me going there =p Thanks...

Escape

Wahahahaha.... Muahahaha.... Hohohohohoho....

Thanks to our lecturer who let us go at 1 something instead of 4pm, I'm now at my cousin's house in KL! I thought this would be the first weekend I spend in KTT, but I guess it could wait... Hehe...

When we arrived at cousin's house, Girl Girl was so excited, haha... Then, we went for dinner and then to 1 Utama. Nothing much, but, hehe... at least I escaped, hiahiahiahia....

Exam starting on 4th August. Some lecturers said we might have to sit for exam at nights, when classes in the morning and afternoon will be continued as usual!! >.<

Study hard!!!

P/S Sorry for my excessive weird laughters, kaka...

After a month, is anything the same?

This is the 7th week since I left, but memory is as fresh as yesterday's. Classmates and roommate are nice, and there're always things to do, mostly studying of course... ==" but there's always something being... absent.

The first time I stayed outside of my home sweet home. The first time I realised unforgettable friends could be made within half a year. The first time I knew friends can rely on each other so much, especially when you live together, eat together, play together and do crazy stuff together.

Maybe I'm extraordinary slow in letting go of the past. Every detail in daily life seems to remind me of what we had when we were together. Maybe I'm holding on to it, knowing that it doesn't do me any good except making me sad, because I actually really don't want to forget...

I've talked to them in these few days, through phone. Especially on Eliz's birthday, I realised how much I wished I was there. I called Eliz to wish her birthday, Tee Yong called and complained about... something. And just now, I called Shir Ying after receiving her sms... simply to make sure that we still exist in each other's life...

I long to read their blogs, to know what's going on, but scared of knowing how much I've missed, have been left out. However, the desire to know is always stronger than the fear. =p

So, I'm still visiting their blogs frequently. I read Shir Ying's blog just now, and I'm surprised to find out that she still remember she went to C17 (if she remembered it correctly) to 'fetch' me home once, haha. [This is one of the weird things we do...] And, Shir Ying, you didn't mention, the four of us also went to McDonald, and I'm sure I'll be thinking of that day if I have a chance to go to McDonald with my friends here.

Oh yeah, I didn't mention in this blog... I went to Taylor's My Place on 6th July! I went back to take the things I left there, and I was looking forward to meet them actually. I jumped onto my 'ex-bed' when Shir Ying and I successfully gained access into my 'ex-room', because Eliz left it locked when she went out. The room which I loathed at first, but grew to love when we started hiding into it talking in the afternoons... and after it became someone's 'balai raya', hehe... After a while Eliz came back!! Haha... I thought I couldn't meet her because she was in Sunway with her parents when I arrived. Then we moved to Tee Yong's and Shir Ying's room, continued with our aimless chit-chatting. I was there for about one hour... then I had to go because I still had to come back to... *sigh* , and my parents were waiting outside... Too bad, Tee Yong was in shopping mall with her friends when I arrived, and I told her not to rush back myself...

However, I guess a bit of 忧郁 won't harm =p. I remember the reason I'm here. Besides, I have your support, right? (and support from other friends and family, I know)

= = = = =

A short note about life here in KTT:

Well, I study, obviously. But I do allow myself to relax a bit, by listening to music on my phone (I got some nice songs from friends' handphones), online once in a while (like what I'm doing now), try to read a bit of novel, usually one chapter before sleep, or some, er... motivation books... sms (this one costs a bit of money, but being in contact with friends and family makes me feel good...)

Just now we had the Lecturers' Day celebration. We had a performance by lecturers, and they did impress me... haha... And some of my classmates were in choir, singing 'You Raise Me Up' with a senior called Arun (I'm not sure about the spelling). He really has a beautiful voice...

I think that's all... hope there're things to blog about soon, and hope the line would be good during this weekend so that I can chat with friends...

A Special Day

I'm writing this today because it's a special day... it's Elizabeth's birthday!!!

I wanna thank her mum for her 9 months of hardship and 18 years of 'sufferings' taking care of her =p. Without her mum's perseverance we would never have met in our lives, hehe...

I'm sorry that I didn't remember it at 0.00 21st July. I should have called and sung her a birthday song. Although I can't rap like Shir Ying (I'm trying to imagine...), but I sing (in my heart) very very sincerely. She said she heard it and I believe she really did, haha...

It's a pity that I never had a chance to celebrate any birthday with they all... Although thinking of the fact that we're far apart, about an hour journey by car, and I can't celebrate her birthday with 3 of them makes me kind of down... but I'm really glad that they still remember me, sms, msn with me or sometimes (though very rarely) call me. I'm sorry that they have to spend extra money for that...

So, Liz, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! If it wasn't because of your birth, I could had gotten a really mean roommate in Taylor's, haha. (This applies to Shir Ying's and Tee Yong's birthday as well)

P/S Touched? ;)

Stepping Stone

Weekends at home always pass so fast. Tomorrow I'll be going back. If I tell you I'm perfectly fine with it then I'm lying.

But does it really matter? It's merely a tiny stepping stone on the long way to my destination. It's what I DO that will affect my future. I cannot force myself to like the 'stone', and neither should I dwell on the fact that I don't.

Stop comparing? I don't think I can, at least for the time being.

However, I know that, what has passed will remain in the past, but the memory of it will always be alive and be one of the many treasures in life. I'll carry the treasures with me while stepping hard on the stone. =p

I Will Survive

3 weeks in KTT.

2 weeks of studying.

Continuous feeling down.



I missed everything that can't be found.

I know I should appreciate what CAN be found instead of longing for the impossible.


I drag myself to catch up with the flying time.

Worried for what's coming in exams and all the challenges, but looking forward to the end of these 12 months at the same time.

The inability of finding and holding on to happiness could be the biggest flaw in me, even though I know I'm probably one of the lucky people in this world. The emotional part of me doesn't always agree with the rational part of myself. Ungrateful, you may say.

But I'm trying, alright? I really am.

I know I'll survive.

Student Life

Wake up, go to toilet, go for lessons, go to library during breaks and at night to study, wash clothes, eat, bathe... that's basically my life here in KTT.

Although I definitely miss (very much) those days in Taylor's when it was more relaxing and fun, I cant help admitting that it's good for studies here. I have no choice but to study because EVERYONE else is studying. When you go to library, you see students, especially my classmates (Czech-bound) and Poland bound students busy studying... @_@ I mean, EVERY break, even though it's only one hour.

Yeah... we don't waste even 10 minutes to study. =="

Some of them go for jogging and badminton, Giant... haiz... but I'm not in that mood anyway...

I have to keep reminding myself that this is only for one year and I'm doing it for my own good, haha... (even though I don't think this kind of hectic life will end even in medical school... or after I've successfully become a doctor... IF... ...) Maybe I should start getting used to it? >.< 加油！加油！！！ (cheering for myself...)

p/s I didn't say I like it... I said it's 'good-for-studies'.

Going Back... T_T

I don't want to go back!!!

Argh... stop behaving like a child... try to be matured please...

(but I really hate to go back...)


... ...

Shouldn't I be studying?!?! >.<"

First week at KTT

I survived (one week in new college)!

Hm... I guess I'm fine with my roommate. Same Czech-bound, probably same class, as well... and I just realised, all 9 of the Chinese girls in Czech-bound group (which we named CZECHMATE, or CHECKMATE or CZECHMED) live in the same block (they call it 'tangga' in KTT, if you live in the 'same tangga' means you go to your apartments using the same stairs). Hopefully all of the Czech-bound students will be arranged into the same class, because so far, they're okay...

We had our performance today during the closing ceremony of the orientation week. I think they all did a great job. I said 'they' because I was only in charge of doing the background music, I got some from internet, some from friend, some from seniors/teachers and some from my own collection, then I just edited them and put together, so nothing much... only that downloading songs in KTT was definitely time consuming... because we were doing 'fashion show' to present fashion of different regions of the world and also the fashion in the 70s, we needed different kinds of music. Editing wasn't easy for me because it was my first time doing that, hehe... Though, I really think the orientation which lasted for one week was a bit of a waste of time... haiz... they should know how packed is our schedule... Seems like I'm going to have a year of 非人生活...

Life goes on, but I'm still having twinges of, er... sadness, emptiness, after all the laughters. Every little things here reminds me of Taylor's, PM1 and ex-housemates... Even when having fun, I'd suddenly think: are they having fun? what are they doing? we used to have fun together. I don't know how to describe the feelings... I feel like I was dragged away from their lives, and now we're parallel lines which will not intersect, and I could only look at them from far... =.= I can always know what's happening there, but I'll never be part of it anymore. Not to mention, I still miss Muar and my family. How am I going to survive one year?!?! Wouldn't it be stupid if I still fail to pursue my dream after all these 'sacrifices'?

A New Journey

The end of one journey is the beginning of another.

Tomorrow I'm going to Kolej Teknologi Timur. I don't feel excited like I did before going to Taylor's. I feel extraordinarily calm. I feel like I'm just waiting to see what's going to happen there. I'm not expecting great things, so I guess I can accept it if it turns out to be... *ahem*. Haha... Wish me good luck!

By the way, I've finished watching 法证先锋2(Forensic Heroes 2)! I thought I couldn't watch it until next weekend! [SPOILER] The ending was quite... good, because story between Bell and Ivan only started to turn better in the last 30 seconds. I seriously thought they were letting Ivan to be in coma until the end, or wake up but lose memory and can't even remember who's Bell (cruel things they like to do, haha). I wouldn't bear such an ending, ==".[/SPOILER]

Anyway, I'm not sure whether I'll subscribe for internet at KTT yet. I can go online at the computer lab, but I heard they ban some websites, so I don't know whether I'll be able to blog often... But I'll try my best =p

Addicted >.<"

I haven't been online so much these few days, because I'm addicted to other things for the time being... >.<"

Firstly, is the Hong Kong TVB series called Forensic Heroes 2 (法证先锋2). Argh!! I had been waiting for it for so looong.... It's quite nice I think... AND, I kind of like Charmaine Sheh and Kevin Cheng, hehe... Too bad the finale will be aired AFTER the college starts! I'll have to watch it after I come back during the weekend... TVB series = that's what holidays are for =D. Well, I've been watching them ever since I could remember...

Credit: creator of this banner =.=

Primary School

Today I went back to the primary school I studied at, Chung Hwa 1(B) [http://www.muarchunghwaosa.org/FAboutCH-Content00.htm], to attend a 奖励金-giving ceremony (sorry, I really don't know what is it called in English =p).

I think the last time I went was in form 1?? Can't really remember... but I still like the environment pretty much. When I walked past the oldest building, I was reminded of the ghost stories we heard back in primary, lol. And the stage... looked slightly smaller than I thought it was. Haha, I haven't grown an inch since I left primary, honestly... I guess it's because I've seen bigger stages?

At the right is 四维堂;
The other building is 九思楼。

The stage. The words on top are 礼，义，廉，耻。

At the right, is the place I used to wait for my mum's car, called 武基亭.

P/S I was surprised to find a page about Muar on wikipedia, containing things which I didn't know @_@ --> http://zh.wikipedia.org/wiki/%E9%BA%BB%E5%9D%A1

Random - Test for fun

Your Five Factor Personality Profile

Extroversion: You have low extroversion. You are quiet and reserved in most social situations. A low key, laid back lifestyle is important to you. You tend to bond slowly, over time, with one or two people. Conscientiousness: You have medium conscientiousness. You're generally good at balancing work and play. When you need to buckle down, you can usually get tasks done. But you've been known to goof off when you know you can get away with it. Agreeableness: You have low agreeableness. In general, you feel that people are not to be trusted. And you're skeptical that anyone else really feels differently. Neuroticism: You have medium neuroticism. You're generally cool and collected, but sometimes you do panic. Little worries or problems can consume you, draining your energy. Your life is pretty smooth, but there's a few emotional bumps you'd like to get rid of. Openness to experience: Your openness to new experiences is low. You're a pretty conservative person, and you favor what's socially acceptable. You think that change for novelty's sake is a very bad idea. While some may see this as boring, many see you as dependable and wise.

The Five Factor Personality Test

P/S What is said above is not necessarily true!

怀疑

最近心情不好……对很多事情都抱着怀疑……

怀疑好朋友到底是不是好朋友，
怀疑世上有没有长久这东西，
怀疑付出和回报是不是同比例，
怀疑承诺到底该不该相信。

怀疑自己的能力，
怀疑我能不能适应，
怀疑要怎么高兴。


怀疑自己不懂得感恩的幼稚心情。

'Busy' Day

I suppose it was my busiest day since I came back from KL.

Woke up around 7 in the morning, fetched my brother to school for activity (i definitely 'miss' these, =p), then went to eat bak kut teh, one of my favourites! The bak kut teh in Muar is different from those in KL. Less bak kut, more of other ingredients. It suits me because I'm not that into bak kut actually, haha...

In the afternoon, Charayne and I met at the cinema. Since it was still early, Charayne brought me to a restaurant (... or cafe, whatever) which I didn't know exist. Haha, so we sat there and chit chat until 1.30, mostly about our college life... then went to the cinema again to watch Kung Fu Panda!! Hm... I wouldn't say it's the best, but it was still quite funny. It's an animation which worth watching I think...

At night, after dinner, we went to Wetex, to buy blouse and slacks... because I just realised not long before that, at my new college, I'm supposed to wear those. Kind of like... formal. T_T AND, shoes with HEELS. =.=" . I'll just assume that they're teaching us to wear properly when we come out for work... At last I found some blouse and slacks... but not a single pair of shoes...

Gloomy

Can I just lay on the bed doing nothing?

Stare at the ceiling and wait for a dream which can distract me from gloomy thoughts?

Would it be a merrier day tomorrow?

I just can't stop feeling bad these days... I'm supposed to be happy!!!! I'm so so so SO lucky to get it. I guess it's the place where I'm going which makes me feel so bad. Not Czech. I absolutely LOVE the fact that I'm going to Czech!! Europe. My dream place since years ago... to study Medicine! What I meant was... another place where I'm going 2 weeks later. Why can't I just ACCEPT it with an open heart? I'm not thinking and reacting to things logically...

Random post

Just to let you know what's going on in my life, haha... Actually, there's nothing much. went for medical check-up (the reason I had to come back earlier, hate!!), played with dogs, sleeping, watching tv, online... 'thinking'...

There were a lot of people when I went for medical check-up. Luckily I could still manage to finish most of the steps in one day. When I got everything done it was exactly 5 pm already... Have to go back on Thursday to check for the result of Mantoux Test (a test to check for Tuberculosis). When I was doing check-up, I heard the nurses saying that I looked 'comel' and 'kecil' for a future doctor... oh, well~~ (-.-)

Another productive activity I've done would be playing with dogs I guess, haha... They're as cute as ever!

Sleeping and staring...

And... [posting for the sake of posting]

Cute and delicious

You're the best presents I got in Taylor's

This is my 101st post...

Thank you Shir Ying, for coming back 3 days earlier before your holiday ends.

Thank you Liz, for going back one day later than your original plan.

Thank you Tee Yong, for going out with us even though you have exam coming.

I thought I could stay for another few days after the exam. I really planned to do so! But after asking around, I realised the medical check-up report might take more than 2 weeks. Sorry I couldn't keep my promise! >.<" I knew we would be leaving each other one day, I just didn't expect it to be so soon. I'm really glad to have known you and have spent happy moments with you all. I'll definitely miss all your silly jokes and the silly things we've done. Hope I can see you girls soon (face to face, not on webcam, haha)!

*** *** ***

And, of course, thank you PM1, for saying good bye and wishing me good luck that day, haha! You all are nice classmates and I'm glad to have met you all. =D

Piao, Mavis, Chee Yuen, Betsy and Yuva having lunch with me in AC on Friday.

I know I didn't leave Taylor's empty handed. ^^

Blessing in Disguise?

I'm going to a college, where the air is fresh, and the only thing I can do is study.

I guess I've changed a lot after coming to Taylor's. I guess I really was a bookworm back in secondary. I guess I really was a 'study-type' of student.

Am I anymore?

So I should be a bookworm until the moment I graduate from university?

I like the way it is here. I can go out and buy food and stuff anytime I want. There's a hawker centre with so many food (although most of them are expensive), rows of shops to buy from. So many different kinds of students. It's 5 minutes from Sunway Pyramid, 45 minutes from the centre of KL... Lively classmates, funny housemates... It's always full of activities... Once you step out of hostel you see people everywhere...

Maybe I'm slowly forgetting how to be REALLY hard-working... and I'm cursing myself for this. I'm angry with myself for this.

I should be studying and studying and studying?

Is it why I have to leave? A blessing in disguise?

In order to force myself back into my old self?

Class Party

Bio teacher, Tks teacher, Maths teacher and Chemistry teacher.

Poh Yuan eating wasabi

Oh, well....(Xin Wei's face was 'decorated' by me... kaka =p)

0801APM1, not everyone's here though... (we set the timer, then everyone jumped into the picture the moment the shot was taken...)

Yup! We had a class party on last friday, 30th May. We had lots of fun playing games, and I was lucky enough not to be punished, hehe. I was one of the three with our faces still clean after the games, haha. The punishments for the games were eating wasabi (@@) and having pictures drawn on the face with lipstick... Piao, Chee Yuen and I were the 'winners' of the 'Bing Bing Bang' game, haha... The party started at 1.30 and ended around 3.30... (uhm... I'm feeling lazy to describe the whole party >.<) But, well... I guess the memory will be a great present for me before I leave Taylor's. I'm glad I did take quite a number of photos that day...

Pizzas! (and seng chye's head)

Me and Betsy (thanks for having lunch with me!! =D)

Me, Betsy, Adelynn, and ....
Mavis

For more information, please visit http://rhythm-of-the-heart.blogspot.com/2008/05/class-party.html =p

Leaving

First, I missed my home everyday, every moment!

Then, I felt lonely because there was nobody to talk to.

Then, I felt miserable and wondered whether I was going to be like this for one and a half year?!

Then, I tried my best to run away from hostel every weekend... to Muar or to cousin's house, as long as it's not hostel!

... ...

Then, we went to Pizza Hut and had our first long chat.

Then, we had more and more to talk about.

Then, we went to Sg Wang and Times Square together.

Then, we went to watch horror movie although I was usually scared of one XD

Then, we can chat in room for so long.

Then, I actually I missed them during holidays.

Then, I could finally talk and make friends with some of the classmates.

Then, I could bear listening to her singing for so long (我爱的人) (haha...)

Then, we could laugh and laugh and laugh at silly jokes.

Then, I really DO enjoy it here...

Then,

I'm leaving.

Subang Jaya--> Pudu --> Muar

I'm back in Muar! Haha. The mid-term exam is going to start on 9th June, so I decided to come back as I'm not coming back for the next 2 weekends.

I came back by bus with Yee Ling they all. 8 Muarians. Taylor's does have a lot of Muarians ... haha, but many of them I don't know... (knowing their names doesn't mean I know them...)

Sheryn's 2-week holiday started today, and she was going to live in her friend's house for the coming week because they were going to do hospital attachment in KL. She was supposed to leave earlier than me, around 1.30pm, and the 4 of us spent quite a few minutes saying goodbye as if we were not going to meet for a whole year, LOL. >< However, within 10 seconds after she closed the door, she came back and said the plan had been changed, she were to leave at around 3.30... I was speechless...

Ok, back to my 'adventure' from Subang Jaya to Muar.

Around 10 minutes before 2, I went over to Yee Ling's unit and waited for the others. By 2.55, all eight of us: Yee Ling, Chia Ing, Kai Chi, Kai Lu, me, Leon, Dennis and Sze Shen were already at Pudu. We waited for 50 minutes for the bus!! AND, while were were waiting for the bus 'patiently', a woman dropped some money on the floor, we were all confused because she didn't seem to be going to pick it up, so I picked up the money and handed to her. Another woman appeared and took the money quite rudely. Weird women... Then, after a few minutes, she came back, still with her handphone, started talking to us using a language none of us could understand. We could only hear something like 'portuguese'. We all stared at her and I was thinking: 'What is she doing? She's talking to her handphone or to us?'. Then, she suddenly walked away. @.@ Not long after the woman disappeared, we realised something - Dennis' laptop was gone!! He had put it on the floor with his 2 other bags, and now only the one contained the laptop was gone. So, we think we realised what the woman was up to! She must had been working together with someone else to steal. She was trying to catch our attention by dropping the money (but failed) and talking to us with a foreign language (it might not be a language at all...), while her 'teammate' stole the laptop! We were all feeling stupid... how could we fall for such a trick when we all knew that we should be extra careful in Pudu? >< style="font-style: italic;">u tak tau baca ar? Apa ini? Saya tak sekolah pun tau!' Then, only I saw a tiny 'cute' piece of paper sticking at the edge of the board with 'Batu Pahat' on it, said 'Muar'.

Ok, fine.

I guess nothing special happened after that... Now I'm back in Muar, ate Xia Mian (虾面), and I'm going to appreciate my own super comfortable bed... hehe.

Aftershock?

Really, we felt an aftershock of earthquake a few days ago. >.<

I was writing on my table that day, while Eliz was doing something on her table, and Tyong and Sheryn were chatting in our room as well. Then suddenly I felt my table shaking, but I thought I was writing too hard, haha. Then, Eliz asked something like :'Why is it shaking?' (or something like this, can't remember exactly). And TYong said she was feeling like she couldn't stand steadily, and Sheryn saw my table moving... freaking. So, we stared at each other and kept asking what was it, was it true. I don't know what were they thinking, but I was wondering if we were hallucinating, because by the time we realised, the tremor was over already. To confirm, I msn to ask Betsy if she could feel it, because she was living in another block in the same apartment. She said she couldn't. I was really puzzled that time, haha--- all 4 of us having illusion at the same time!? Haha... a few minutes later, I asked Mavis, another classmate living in another block. Well, she felt it too!! Then some of us started receiving 'news' from friends living in other areas of KL through msn or sms, saying that they felt it as well. Oo... so now we knew we weren't hallucinating. 

So, I started thinking if it was caused by the earthquake in China. But it was quite weird because it's been few days after the earthquake, and people in Malaysia didn't feel anything when the quake was supposed to be strongest, when the first and initial earthquake occurred on 12th May. However, my question was answered when I read newspapers on Wednesday. It was the aftershock of earthquake in Northern Sumatra, 6.1 on Richter scale, not China. But the earthquake in Sumatra was also triggered by the earthquake in China... 

We've been reading so many sad news newspapers this few days., and also touching stories of how people sacrificed. I'm really touched by those who can sacrificed themselves to save the others... Hope this is going to end soon!

Summary of the Weekend

My aunty's dogs

Friday

Today I went over to er gu's house... Spent the afternoon there, taking some pictures of the dogs... Reached back at hostel around 8.30. There were only Sheryn and me left. Most of the others went back to their hometowns because we were going to have Monday off (Wesak Day). So, Sheryn moved into my room since there were nobody else at home...

Before I went to aunt's house, I played table tennis with Zi Yang, Poh Yuan and Chee Yuen. Haha, it was quite interesting, table tennis... I should join them for more when I have time, hehe...

Saturday

I woke up at 10.30, haha... Then we went to AC to have "brunch"... After that, we went shopping at... ... 7-eleven. Wakaka... So, for the rest of the day, we basically hide in the room... Except, at night, I went to Sakae Sushi at Subang Parade with aunty (二姑) and her family. Came back, continued to online, do homework... slept at 3.40am @@

Sunday

I went to watch Prince Caspian with my aunt, uncle, and cousins at Sunway Pyramid. Haha, I didn't know they were going to watch it. It was quite nice, at least much better than the first Narnia movie, in my opinion. ^^

After the movie, we had CRABS for dinner, haha... Haven't eaten crabs for quite some time already... it's one of my favourite food... although eating crabs is quite a difficult task, especially when eating in public, haha. I prefer it at home... -.-

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention... I think I'm never never going to forget 我爱的人by林宥嘉... I've been listening to this song for more than don't-know-how-many times (sung by the singer himself, OR by Sheryn... ) already these few days! It's already being played automatically in my head... OMG... and guess what, when I saw Charayne online, her personal message was the lyrics of this song! I nearly fainted... @@ I wonder why they LOVE it so much... haha... I don't hate it, I'm just feeling weird listening to it over and over and over and over again, haha... =p