Back To The Beginning Part III

 I wrote this in June but didn't get around to posting it....better late than never, eh? This family history segue is being written so I can preserve what little I know about my father's life for future generations (the great grand kids might want to know this stuff, right?)....so mostly I'm just rambling and trying to get everything down and saved....albeit slowly...

In honor of Father's Day.....said with a little bit of a snicker....just coincidence is all.

Telling Patty about Jill was tougher than I thought it would be. Patty, Pat and I had made plans to go to the Truro Raceway the next day for the harness races, so I figured that would be the perfect opportunity to tell her. Just a nice afternoon playing the ponies and passing on some big family news. What I didn't know, until we were almost there, was that we were meeting some of their friends...so we didn't get any time alone all afternoon. Didn't win any money either. In the end, as they were dropping me off at the MacKays', I had to ask her if she was going to be home that night because I had something I wanted to talk about. I hate doing that to people...leaving them hanging, but that was all I could do at that point. If they were going out and I had to hang onto this for one extra hour, I was going to burst! Was she surprised? You betcha!! It was great...

Jill and her husband, Wayne, have a trailer they use in the summer near Kentville. We arranged to meet Jill there on Saturday. Were we nervous? Oh yeah...very...and there were unspoken thoughts as to whether or not the excitement would induce Patty to do a floppy, and she's be introduced as "sleepy-falling down Patty" right from the get go. But she did good. No flopping all afternoon.
 
Mom had wanted to come, but I figured her motivation was mostly curiosity and this was something I wanted to do more low key at that point. Kinda funny though.....when we stopped at the campground office to have them open the gate, the woman in there became so excited.....she told us we could take are car right in to the trailer site and skip the parking lot. It hadn't occurred to me that they'd roll out the red carpet for us. But, as we found out, Jill has many good friends there who knew that she had been searching for family. I guess everyone of them had a little investment in the outcome.

So, in we drove, as unseen trailer neighbors peeked from behind their blinds and curtains at "Jill's 2 sisters". We found her site number, and there she was, waiting on the front porch for us. As yappy as I tend to be when my fingers get to flying over the keyboard...there doesn't seem to be anyway I can really describe what it felt like to meet a new sister. For starters, I am incredibly awe inspired how much this whole meeting resulted from a few seemingly inconsequential circumstances and decisions. Really!....Something as trivial as a TV show that I only had half an interest in watching, could have kept me away from my laptop in the middle of the night...and who knows if this meeting would ever have taken place.

There were hugs and a few tears of happiness. There was an amazing family resemblance. And it all just felt right. The three of us sat on the deck of Jill's trailer and talked for the rest of the afternoon. We shared our stories and Jill told us how hard she had been looking for members of Jim's family and how she eventually gave up hope of ever doing so. She had been in touch with our cousins in New Brunswick who shared with her what they knew of our father, and had sent her some pictures. We ended up filling gaps for each other as we all had different knowledge from a different time.

One of the biggest surprises for me and Patty was to learn that we have another sister who is older than me. She was raised by her birth mother and husband as their own child, and was never told the truth about her birth father. The people who raised her are still alive, and I've managed to piece together their names....but we all think it's best just to leave them be.

There are rumors of other children, younger ones, but nothing really to go on. Back in 1972, I had a visit from someone who knew Jim out in Calgary. If I remember correctly, he said Jim was married and also that he had other children. He mentioned a 12 year old (that would have been Jill), a 4 year old, and a new baby.

In 1972, Jim married Linda Christie, but everyone I have been in contact with says there were no children in that marriage. Linda was killed in a single car accident in June of 1974 when she was only 29 years old. She had gone to pick up a puppy she was giving to Jim as a gift. As she was returning home with it, she drove off the road into the Fraser Canyon at China Bar near Hell's Gate in British Columbia....both she and the dog were killed. I can't find out any more about her, though. A couple of months ago I met some cousins in Maine who had some pictures of Jim and Linda....even a wedding photo. She was a petite and pretty blonde. One of the cousins in Maine was going to scan and send me digital copies of them but nothing yet. We haven't been in touch since our visit in Maine. Not sure why....just got busy with moving stuff I suppose.

So....anyway...back to our meeting Jill. The afternoon flew by and as I said, we mostly talked about what we knew about Jim and the McMullin family. We talked about our childhoods, and Jill told us how she found out that the man she thought was her "real" father actually was her adoptive one. She told us how upset her mother had been when she asked her about it, and how the subject was dropped between them for many years. We all felt that we were better off having been raised in the families we were, than in the one that could have been. It's hard to believe that I had another sister who was growing up a few hours drive away and had no idea. It also turns out that we like to do some of the same things...like quilt and write.

That day we met Jill's husband, Wayne. And the following Saturday, we drove back down again with Mom and Pat. Jill's son, David, and his wife, Erica, were there with their two adorable daughters....Emily and Peyton. Mom totally enjoyed herself and a good time was had by all. (How's that for a cliche?) But it was good and we did have a great time, and I was really looking forward to when John would be home again and he could come meet them, too.

In another post, I'll write down all that I know about Jim in one place....just to keep all that together. I've got the genealogy that Ralph Shaw did, and some more information on the McMullins that Jill has collected. I'll piece that together and add in what we know about Jim. I'm not sure how much more digging I'll do. I've been told that the person who would have the most first hand knowledge about Jim would be my uncle Roy's second wife Virginia. There's a good deal of history there....not sure if she'd even want to talk to me, but I did manage to find an address for her. Maybe someday I'll write her a letter....

Back in the "Former" USSR.....Reprise

Well, here we are. Back in Azerbaijan again. All moved in and once that box of John's "work" things make its way down the street to the office, and the spare room bed gets some sheets on it....we'll be all in and done. In fact, we are down to rug shopping now which I take as a good sign. I think we'll like this place. It doesn't have the spectacular view that some of the other apartments had, but it has an okay one.



The common areas are nice (something rare in this town) and it's close to lots of places we tend to frequent....like Schlotzky's deli and Cinnabon for coffee.

Our favorite Chinese restaurant is on the corner and John can walk to his office in less than 5 minutes. No more having to look for street parking at Caspian Plaza because he has a place right here underneath our building. There is even a "super" or as he's called in Baku a "commandant" to look after the stuff that breaks....or doesn't work in the first place. I've had a few visits with the commandant already.

After all the looking, and thinking, and considering that went on in June over what apartment we should take, we ended up having to begin the search all over again when we got here at the end of August.

For some reason.....after the landlord handed over the keys to the one we had chosen (nice view, not so nice neighborhood) he decided that his son (who apparently had been dealing with it) made an error in the rental amount. Instead of 2,000 manat a month, he really wanted 3,000. A fact that only came to light after several meetings to resolve...whatever....the end result of which was a complete breakdown in negotiations. I didn't find out about any of this until it was all an undone deal and John called to ask me for the phone number of one of the other agents we had used. At the time he was pretty mystified about what had happened to blow the deal, and he had some of the local guys from the office working on it. He really was hopeful that whatever the problem it could be resolved....but in the end...it didn't happen. I was okay with it. The neighborhood wasn't what I had hoped for anyway.

John went to choice number two which was the duplex downtown near the school. I had really liked that apartment in June, but when I tried to deal with the landlord he was a major pain in the butt. He wanted 5 months rent up front and a 2 year lease just for starters. He wasn't bending on anything....so I gave up what I thought would be an awesome place because of that. By the time John got to see it he was still not bending and in the end, he decided not to rent it but to sell it, instead. We weren't interested in buying.

John and I arrived in Baku on August 29th and a few days later we started to look all over again. I was determined to find an apartment as soon as we could. Our shipment had arrived from Dubai and cleared customs, all we needed was a place to put it, and I was really anxious to get into my own place. We looked at 5 apartments on our first day out and this one was the 5th.



It's got 2 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, 2 balconies, and the maid comes 2 days a week. She brings her almost 2 year old daughter with her.....so I'm getting in Grandma practice every Tuesday and Thursday.



Being back in Baku is okay. There have been a lot of changes to the city in the past 3 years! Somehow even the people on the street look more modern...if that makes any sense. There are new markets and malls....malls that look similar to western malls except that they tend to go up instead of sprawl. They don't have acres of parking lots either. The traffic here has gotten insane! So many more cars on the road; Hyundai and KIA are making a killing here. John is driving himself now and so far so good. Luckily the vehicle he's driving has over 200,000 kms on it so we really only have to consider personal safety while we're out there on the roads.

The end for now.....anticipating some good stories to share over the next while as I try to adapt to life in Azerbaijan all over again. It sure would be nice if I had of retained some Russian or Azeri, but sadly I have not....first thing will have to be finding a new teacher.

The Longest House Hunt Ever

Usually, we are pretty fast when it comes to deciding where we are going to live. Not sure what's going on this time, but committing to an apartment has been harder this week than it's ever been. Maybe because we have seen some fairly nice places but none of them has been entirely perfect. I'm not sure I have ever had a home that was entirely perfect, or even close to it..but it's worth trying for, right?

And maybe this isn't exactly the right city for such high habitat hopes....we have so far looked at about 25 apartments. We started a week ago with three on the first day I arrived. I think we were out looking with agents every day since except for Sunday. We have had four agents. On Tuesday, the "we" became "me" because John got too busy at work to come with me, and he left it up to me to choose. I guess he has forgotten that I am the woman who mistakenly thought the house she bought in Newfoundland, some years back, had a garage and two bathrooms. Glad to know he trusts me again!

When choosing a place, anywhere, location is one of the primary considerations. Then there's layout and size to consider....how many bedrooms...what's included...stuff like that. Here in Baku, you have to like the furniture because 99% of apartments come furnished (right down to the knives and forks, and the bedding). If there is something you really can't live with (and most of the time there is something hideous), then you ask the landlord if he would remove it should you decide to rent. Accommodating landlords seem to agree to take out anything you want....and then there are some who whine about where they can put it. Of course, there are those like ours in Dubai who agreed to take things out, and never sent anyone to pick them up. Since we have some furniture of our own, one of the considerations is how we can incorporate what we have with what is there. No matter what apartment we choose, we are definitely going to have an eclectic mix....just trying to keep the "IKEA- meets-Arabian Nights-meets-the-Marie Antoinette" down to a dull roar.

You also have to like the wallpaper because 100% of apartments are wallpapered...because wallpaper is classy and expensive, so a classy expensive apartment is going to have wallpaper. If one is lucky the wallpaper is a textured vinyl in a neutral color.....gold is popular. Most likely, though, the paper has a pattern and there is a good chance it's a bold pattern. Might as well spend that money making a statement. If it's a really classy brand new apartment, there will be a sparkly sprinkles in the wall paper. I've seen this at least a dozen times in bedrooms...often with a bold pattern to go with it.

The next kind of funky thing around here are the common areas. Since street frontage is valuable commercial space, no apartment building has an entrance from the street on which it sits. To access the "lobby"....a term I'm using in its loosest possible sense....you have to wend your way to the back of the building, past the kids playing soccer on the asphalt, past the haphazardly parked cars, past the security guy out having a smoke.....All to get to a tiny, four person elevator with no air conditioning.....sometimes there is a light in the "lobby" and sometimes you have to turn it on yourself if you can't see anything. Fancier places use reflective, polished marble floors and walls which helps in the dim light. Hallways aren't typically lit either....you flip the light on when you get off the elevator and it goes off on a timer. Can get a tad creepy.

Since the owners of apartments essentially just buy a box from the builder and in a lot of buildings there are no covenants requiring that the unit be completed in any particular time frame, it's possible to get off the elevator and see one or two nicely finished wooden doors and a couple of steel ones covered in plastic. Most of the time the hallways are just painted concrete, decorated with gas meters. The trick to apartment hunting in Baku is to put on your blinders until you actually get inside the unit. First impressions can just kill the joy if you don't....because inside there can be something pretty spectacular. Getting past that outer crust can be hard, though.

By far the nicest apartment we have seen is a penthouse in the area of the U.S. Embassy. It's beautifully finished with high end appliances, really spacious rooms, lots of clever storage space, a very accommodating landlord who has agreed to amend a couple of design issues for me. It comes with the lowest price tag and a million dollar view.

BUT.....it's got no neighborhood.....take this place and move it ten blocks and the price would double. It's still on the list and will be the last one we see tonight. It's been a week since I've seen it and I wonder if it will seem as amazing as it did on first viewing. If it does, then I'm going to have to ask myself how important it is that I be able to go out and walk around in my neighborhood. It's not like that's something I've really been doing all that much over the past 5 years or so.....and with the savings on this one, I could pay the monthly salary of a driver to take me where ever I want to go walking anyway.

The next apartment still in the running is a three bedroom in the building above the Sahil Metro station. For location is can't be beat. It's got shopping and proximity to more shopping....coffee shops and restaurants, the pedestrian street and the seaside boulevard are all within 2 blocks. It has great views of the Caspian from its three balconies. It's clean, it's modern and the current occupant even happens to be from Newfoundland. (Not that is really matters once he is gone). The only thing is.....all that convenience comes at the price of crowding. the street is always packed with people and cars. I imagine there's a pretty decent rumble, too, as the Metro train arrives in the basement.

The last possibility is a two bedroom duplex....which mean 2 levels, here, not 2 places side by side. It needs a lot of work but the location is fabulous! Downtown but across from a school and a park which makes it a lot quieter than some. According to the agent, the landlord will fix it up and it could really be a spectacular place. John hasn't seen it, though, and it doesn't look like he will get the chance before we leave for Dubai.

A Touch Of Insommnia

I'm not sure what's going on with me lately, but I've noticed that if I go to bed before midnight I wake up every couple of hours until it's daylight. This morning, I found myself totally wide awake at 4 am. In my head, I was jumping from one scenario to another, after 22 minutes.....I gave up and came out here to make some tea and to ramble...

I spent most of yesterday setting up appointments with movers and contacting real estate agents in Baku. Some of them got back right away with some possible apartments...some of them looked pretty interesting as in places I might like to live and others were....just....interesting.

I always wanted a cherub adorned fireplace.

Back to the Very Beginning - Part II

I said in Part I that I found out a little bit about my New Brunswick cousins via Facebook....I never did send messages to any of them...like..."Hey, it's me your long lost cousin!" I really didn't know how much if anything they knew about me, and whether or not I'd be taken for some crazy person wanting to be friends. So, I let the questions remain. I had a harder time trying to pinpoint my cousins in Washington state...I had heard no more from the sister of the 3rd wife...so I figured that they weren't interested.

Still a lot of questions remained. It's amazing how many more questions come up when you start getting answers! Most of  those answers came this summer.....so I'll fast forward a bit. Idle time....wee hours of the morning...I was googling again for something to do. Everyone was in bed, John had gone off to start his new job in Dubai, and there I was alone at the dining room table contemplating some cinnamon buns from the second-hand Bread Store....

I tried my father's name and Google in its infinite wisdom (or I made a typo)...changed the spelling from "McMullin" to "McMullen" and returned items for that spelling instead. I didn't notice the difference. It was late and I probably was trying to lick some cinnamon bun icing from my fingers. About halfway down the first page I saw this post on an adoption query board.

**Penney - (McMullen) Looking for my biological family. I was born summer 1960, (twin girls). My mother worked in Halifax 1959, her name was Hulda Penney. My biological father was married with a family, so my mother moved to rural Nova Scotia after discovering that she was pregnant. My mother passed away in 2005. I know that my biological father had roots in New Brunswick (Possibly Perth). His father was associated with a news paper there. I believe my fathers name may be " Jim McMullen", however; I am not sure. I am interested in finding siblings or any info on the family.**

OMG! That's me....a sibling! Not the piece of family history I was expecting! I read the entry again and again....I couldn't believe it! It wasn't like having another sister was outside the realm of possibility (considering there was some talk) but to actually see it written out like that was mind-blowing. Right about that same time, Rob came up the basement stairs and I showed him the post. He seems impressed but he says that I'm probably not going to respond. "Oh, yes I am!" says I....tomorrow after I sleep on it and come up with the right things to say. He laughed and said..."See, I knew you wouldn't." And he disappeared back down the stairs with a late night snack in hand.

I had way too much adrenaline to have a serious shot at sleep. So, I gave up trying to find the right thing to say....I managed to compose some sort of email and sent it off to "jsmith".....then I headed off to bed feeling like it was Christmas Eve, and I was a five years old again.

Unfortunately, I woke up a few hours later to find that my email had come back as undeliverable. And now, I was faced with trying to find another way to contact someone named "jsmith". Luckily, I had packed my detective hat this trip. I reasoned that the best way to narrow down a "jsmith" would be through the unusual name of her mother which was Hulda. With any luck, someone might have done some genealogical work and her name (with some connections) would come up if I Googled it. The hunch paid off and right away I found Hulda Penney, and the name of her husband, and the names of her children and their birth dates. All of the dates made sense. Hulda Penney had married Howard Goodwin. They had 5 children...Jill and Judy born August of 1960, and 3 more born starting later in the 60's.

I used Facebook to search for the names of the other children, narrowing it down by geography and age....then I cross referenced the friends lists looking to see if they had each other as friends. When I figured out who was who on Facebook, I then checked the friends lists for Jill or Judy Smiths. I found "Jill Smith" on all of them. And out went the messages on Facebook.....and I was sure they would think I was some nut. Once I had a name I was able to poke around some more and eventually, I came up with a better email address because Jill had posted to the adoption query board again, several months later. Not one to leave any bases uncovered I sent an email to that address, too. Less than 24 hours later, I got a reply from Jill on Facebook....and the day after that....Patty and I were on our way to meet her!

Part 3.....coming eventually....

New Day...New Job

Three months later....

John went off to see about his new job today. To do so he had to fly to Baku since his new job will be there, and not here. But I think this is the job he really wanted and so when it sort of became obvious he was going to get it, he stopped looking for something around here. Of course, we were in Canada for the past 3 weeks, so looking around here, from there, isn't as easy as it sounds....internet and cell phones, notwithstanding. One thing for sure, this job will be head and shoulders above the last job which SUCKED....big time. He decided he had to get out of there about 4 months into it, and by Christmas he had made up his mind he was done. Completely done happened at the beginning of April but luckily we could stay here in the apartment and get paid for it until the end of July, so we had some time....which really flies quicker than you'd like when you're looking for a job and you want the pay checks to keep coming. My first choice would have been to stay in Dubai, but.....

What do I think about going back to Baku? Well.....I hear it has changed quite a bit. There are a lot of malls and many more restaurants. Check out the new Park Bulvar Mall along the boardwalk downtown.

 I hear that the Chinese restaurant that we used to frequent is now a Cinnabon - Schlotzky's deli combo, and that Costa Coffee is coming soon. I am a Costa Coffee regular, here, in Dubai. This time around we are going to live in an apartment in the city center, so I can go out and wander on my own. Go to the market and do things without having to drive or get a driver. Though, I am really anxious to try out one of these brand spanking new purple London cabs.

Baku was an interesting place the last time around....in some respects much more interesting than Dubai. But why should the fact that there is now this in Baku be interesting as well....Are those Christmas decorations and KFC? Is the Colonel being taken for Santa Claus?

 
John is going to drive this time, so there will be no "Ali" to smooth the way for so many things...but he says I can have a driver if I want. Guess that's something I'll decide once I get there.

On Sunday, I have to rely on a Dubai Taxi driver to find the Azerbaijan consulate so I can apply for my visit visa. The whole system is changed, now, and I have to apply for the visa before I leave the U.A.E. instead of getting it at the Baku airport on arrival. As soon as it is approved, I'm going over to meet John and we'll look for a place to live. I expect this will be a lot easier this time since we know the place, and where to look before we even get started. I think I'll stay for 2 weeks since there ain't nuthin' shakin' 'round here these days. It's also as hot as Hades right now!

While I'm waiting I suppose I could be productive and clean out the closets and wardrobes...but seriously, how bad can it be after only 9 months? I think I'll concentrate on eliminating shoes this time. I bought way too many pairs of flip flops when I was in Canada last month.....flip flops are year 'round Dubai wear and a weakness. I am going to have to make room for some regular shoes. I'm a little light on the regular shoes these days.....and long pants. And I am not sure about winter coats...somewhere along the way I lost my favorite one. I need a leather jacket. Baku is cold and windy for part of the year. Okay....what I need to do is organize....find the winter clothes and sort out everything by season. AND then...when all of that is done. I can figure out how many wardrobes I need to buy from Ikea before we leave...since I've never seen a closet in a bedroom in Baku.

I've done some looking online at apartments, and every last one of them comes furnished.....right down to the toasters and dishes. Should be interesting fitting in what we have with what's there. With any luck I can get the landlord to remove the things we don't want or need. We tried that here and it didn't work out so well. Our Russian landlord just doesn't answer his phone in a hurry, and when he does, he tells you that the fridge not working in the apartment is your problem not his. HAHA!! (John managed to repair it himself...but we had made a pact that if he wasn't able to do so, we would go buy a new  fridge, and take it with us, before we spent one Dirham fixing the landlord's.) Mr. Zakir....our Azerbaijani landlord was way more accommodating than this guy....maybe they think refrigerators aren't all that important in Moscow...and he's forgotten that this apartment is not exactly in Russia.

Had we stayed here we were going to be moving anyway, so I suppose the getting out of one place, and into another isn't going to be all that different. And like I said, we haven't had a lot of time to make a big mess of our stuff....should be easier this time. I'm curious to see Baku again. Honestly, it was a place I never thought I would be back to once we left. I wonder how many kids Ali has now. I wonder if I will be able to buy decent cuts of meat in the supermarket or if I will have to import it again.

One thing I know now, that I didn't know last time, is that a direct round trip flight from Baku to Dubai is less than $300. I see shopping weekends in my future. Must keep the account at NBAD open.....just in case this line-up gets old in a few months....

***Sees Debenhams and TWIRLS!!***

A Twiddling of Thumbs

John flew to Germany this morning on an " on-again, off-again" trip...which was on again as of last night. He's due back early Saturday morning and so will be losing a weekend day and a half, but gaining a couple of extra days he can tack onto his vacation. In the meantime, I'm here in the apartment with not a whole lot to do this week since I seem to have some easy-going professors this semester...one's who aren't exactly pushing the school work or assignment thing very hard. In one class (which began in mid-January), I've only had one quiz and one assignment. The assignment was supposed to be just a "weekly" assignment....but so far, 9 weeks in...it's been the only thing we've had to do. The syllabus lists a mid-term project but that date has come and gone, and according to the class schedule we are still on material that we should have been done with by week 3. Not impressed....at all.

The other class has been a little better, except this guy isn't into teaching so much...he has assigned 3 projects (out of 7 for the term) but he hasn't taught us anything yet. I guess we are supposed to figure out how to do these things on You Tube or by digging up tutorials on the web. My kids would laugh at me, complaining about not having enough work to do, but I really need this stuff to keep me busy. I am contemplating a mall trip....


And then, of course, what is going to happen when those boys down there in Dallas wake up and realize that they have let us get way behind? Maybe I should send out an email or 2 to let them know I'm going to be in Greece for 6 days next month, and therefore not to expect anything from me for a couple of weeks in April. Yeah...I can see that working...

I've been told that the internet service where we are staying can be spotty. And who knows, Greece might not have any internet service by the time we get there. AND....I want this to be a vacation with no internet (except what I can get on my iPhone). I can't believe that our holiday is only a month away! I've even started to mull over packing in the back of my mind which something I rarely think about more than a day or two in advance.

Maybe it's all of the travel booking I did in the past week that's got me itching to go again. We are now set for summer vacation to Halifax and a trip with the kids to New York to celebrate our 30th anniversary (WOW!). John wanted us to go to Paris but logistically New York would work better since we have to take the trip in the middle of the N.S. holiday. I booked us into the Doubletree in Times Square and got points tickets for the 4 of us. Can't wait! We really had a great time the last time we went there together. Much better than the camping trip to Prince Edward Island in 2001 which was supposed to be our very last family vacation ever.....yes, it was that bad....took us 7 years to recover.

Okay...well...I guess I should go work on the really long multi-part entry I've been picking at for months and months....or I could go and see if I can stay awake through a few more chapters of my book...or see if it's my turn in any of my Facebook Scrabble games....

(*Walks away in an aura of self congratulation for actually typing a few paragraphs without having to get up and do something else, instead....like check the TV guide for tomorrow....or something.*)

Going Back To The Very Beginning....Part One

Those of you who have been around since the very beginning of this blog....all 3 of you (YAY!)....since day one....might be interested to hear that I have FINALLY made contact my father's family. It wasn't the simple matter I expected..... using that phone number...nothing like that. That phone number would not have worked since my aunt, Elizabeth, died in 1998 when she was just 60. So, back in 2006, I didn't know I was already 8 years too late. Of all things, it was another death in the family that got me moving along this path after so many fits and starts....and it turned out to be a much more convoluted journey than I ever imagined.

You know how every once in a while you Google yourself just to see if you're sort of, kind of, maybe a little famous? Well, I was doing that one night, and there wasn't anything interesting about me coming up at all...in fact, none of the other Sally's were worth reading about either. So, I started checking names I knew from my father's family....just because. It's not really cyber-stalking is it? I just wanted to know if any of them were famous, too. Usually, nothing at all comes up....especially nothing that lets me know that an of these random people are my family members.

Anyway, I got a surprise when an obituary popped up, and it was for my cousin....one who was about 15 years younger than me. From his obituary, I learned that his father....my father's brother, Roy...was also deceased. I Googled him and ended up on ancestry.com where I found, and entered an email conversation with, the sister of my uncle's 3rd wife. God bless those who do the genealogical heavy lifting for the rest of us. She included what information she knew about the McMullin family in her family tree. In her family tree, she had recorded the death of my father and also his sister, Elizabeth, so that's how I came to find out that Elizabeth had died. Both of them died from brain aneurysms at age 60.

The sister of the 3rd wife was encouraging and seemed really excited to help, but my timing wasn't so great with a death in the family just happening. I told her not to bother anyone for a while. I was in no hurry for information or contact (obviously).

I didn't hear another word for over two years. I didn't know if she had told them I had contacted her or not....I wondered that maybe they didn't want to bother with it....just some long lost cousins...and maybe they really didn't need anymore cousins. Either way I had let it go for the time being. The only information that I was able to gather from the sister of the 3rd wife was that my cousin had died of a heart attack.

My uncle, Roy, had passed away on Christmas Day 2007. She told me that my father had been married many times....at least 5 but there was speculation as to the number of divorces....sounded like there might have been fewer....or things weren't necessarily done in the right order. My uncle had taken his ashes home to be buried in New Brunswick.....and that was about it. I think that was enough to stew on for a while.

Before I go any further, I probably should step back and organize the who's who of the McMullin family.....it gets complicated (understatement).

To begin....My paternal grandmother (Elizabeth Sullivan Cyr) was married twice. I am not sure what happened to her first husband. My mother's version of events has Mr. Cyr being killed when he worked on the railway. No matter....at this point, I suppose. What does matter is that it left my grandmother a widow with 3 children...Glenwood, John, and Glenna. She remarried, to Weldon McMullin of Perth-Andover, New Brunswick and had 3 more children...the oldest was my father Wendall (he went by Jim), then Elizabeth, and Roy.

My grandmother's first husband was an American and I think the first 3 children were born there (*turns out the were born in New Brunswick*)....my father and his sister, Elizabeth were born on the Canadian side of the border, though Roy was born in the hospital in Fort Fairfield, Maine. Unfortunately, my grandmother died, at the age of 39, on Halloween, the day after Roy was born, from complications of child birth.

Upon her death, Weldon (or "Stubb" as he was known), was left with 6 kids to look after. He was a young man in his 20's and wasn't able to care for them all, plus a new born...so the family was split up. The older boys were adopted by their American grand parents and given the last name "Sullivan". (Though census record show Glenna and John as having retained the last name "Cyr"....No wonder it's been so hard to find people!). Glenna, then a teenager, remained in New Brunswick to help care for Jimmy and Elizabeth. Infant Roy, as a new born, was too much to take on so he was given to another family for raising. Roy remained with that family until he was 6 years old. Unfortunately, the mother of that family passed away and he was returned to the McMullins by the father. I can't imagine how traumatic that must have been for a six year old.

At this point in the timeline there are still many big gaping holes. I know John served in the US Navy and died of malaria that he contracted in the South Pacific. When Roy grew up he left New Brunswick and, by virtue of being a US citizen, was able to join the US navy, too. My father joined the Canadian one. Elizabeth married and moved to Fredericton.....she might have studied nursing but I am told she really wanted to pursue a career in music.

I had no idea what happened to Glenn and Glenna. Mom said she new Glenna was married to a man who ran a hardware store in Fredericton and she had 2 adopted children, Pam and Butch. Elizabeth and her husband had 4 children...Moira, Grace, Mary Sue, and Will. I remember the names of the 3 girls on the Christmas cards Elizabeth sent my mother back in the 60's....Will was born in the 70's, but by then there was no longer any contact between his mother and mine.

I thought there was a shot at maybe finding out something about Elizabeth's 3 daughters since my gut told me they had probably grown up in Fredericton. Using their maiden names, I searched on classmates.com of all places. It seemed to make sense that there wouldn't be a lot of high schools in a small city like Fredericton and sometimes, classmates.com gives the married name and the maiden name. I tried Fredericton High School guessing at approximate graduation dates. My hunch paid off because I found them....and from there it was off to Facebook. One of the cousins had a profile picture that so resembled my sister, Patty, that I knew right away I had the right person. Her photo albums were public so for the first time I was able to get a glimpse of what people in my father's family looked like. And was able to discover a little bit about their lives.

continued in Part II