I went to the doctor today for my second appointment. I had no idea how far along I was. A sure sign this is baby number four and not number one. I thought I was about 14 weeks but was too lazy to figure it out with a calendar. Turns out I'm almost 16 weeks. A pleasant surprise.
I took Carter with me. Big mistake. As soon as I sat down to get my blood pressure, he freaked. He started his spazzy cry and was trying to pull the blood pressure cuff off my arm. Surprisingly my blood pressure was perfect (127/80). I thought for sure it would be high considering all that is going on.
We got into the room. Carter continued to cry. I apologized to the nurse. She gave him a sucker. Still cried. I think he's a bit traumatized by the doctor's office considering all his visits as of late.
The nurse couldn't find a heartbeat. She tried for about 5 minutes. Then said "We'll just have the doctor find it. Sorry to leave you hanging. Are you okay?" Um, well, you can't find my babies heartbeat so not really. "Yea, I'm fine."
I told my sister a few weeks ago that something felt a little "off". But I'm kind of a worrier so I didn't think much about it.
I waited for 10 minutes for the doctor to come in. An eternally long time. My doc tried to find the heartbeat. Carter was still crying. He put the speaker part right up to his ear so he could hear over the hysterics. (Carter is no longer invited to appointments by the way). He tried for 5ish minutes as well. Nothing.
Unbelievable. This isn't happening. My heart starting racing. He could hear my heart beat fine in the monitor. And mine was fast. His face grew a little somber. You could tell he was nervous. So was I.
I had a quick chat with God in my head. I don't want to say I used threats, but...... I made it very clear this wasn't something that was allowed.
Finally the doctor gave up and said let's go do a quick ultrasound. I wonder what goes through a doctor's mind at the point. I've never, ever had a problem finding the heartbeat. Even when I'm very early in my pregnancy. It's never taken more than 30 seconds.
I lay down on the table, Carter next to me. Crying. Still. He's got what we call a little bit of a temper.
I started to wonder if I should tell the doctor to wait so I could call Mike. I needed someone there with me if bad news was about to come. I decided not to. I didn't want to freak him out.
The second the doctor put the wand (whatever you call that thing) on my stomach, I saw the baby kicking it's legs. And out loud I said "You little shit, you scared the hell out of me." The doctor laughed. He was probably relived too. He measured the heart beat, did a quick look and said "Everything's fine. Sorry for the scare."
I have a feeling this baby is a boy. We find out in 3 weeks.
Oh. And Carter was still crying.
Not my best baby appointment. But at least it turned out okay.
Friday, June 24, 2011
Saturday, June 18, 2011
My brother Burk
Many of you have heard by now (it's still crazy how fast word travels) that my brother Burk was hit by a car Wednesday night. The car was probably going 35-40 miles when it hit him. It was not the drivers fault though we're still unclear how everything happened.
Burk was life flighted to the hospital and is now in the shock trauma ICU. He is heavily sedated with 2 broken legs, a broken arm, 3 skull fractures, and bleeding in his brain. He's a mess. A big mess.
Thank you to those who have sent text, e-mails, and called. We appreciate your concern.
I started a blog to keep family and friends (and people who are morbidly curious) updated on his condition.
If you want to follow it, the blog is www.burkversusauto.blogspot.com
Perhaps the blog URL seems insensitive. But when Burk wakes up, I think "Badass" (read the blog and that will make more sense) will find it amusing.
The boy is indestructable that's for sure. He continues to cheat death.
I've taken a bunch of pictures with my phone (it still seems a little inappropriate to bust out my paparazzi camera) but for now won't be posting any. They're mostly to send to my brothers who are away and to show Burk when he wakes up. He'll need to remember this one.
Crazy times ahead for sure. Life is a pretty big kick in the face right now.
Burk was life flighted to the hospital and is now in the shock trauma ICU. He is heavily sedated with 2 broken legs, a broken arm, 3 skull fractures, and bleeding in his brain. He's a mess. A big mess.
Thank you to those who have sent text, e-mails, and called. We appreciate your concern.
I started a blog to keep family and friends (and people who are morbidly curious) updated on his condition.
If you want to follow it, the blog is www.burkversusauto.blogspot.com
Perhaps the blog URL seems insensitive. But when Burk wakes up, I think "Badass" (read the blog and that will make more sense) will find it amusing.
The boy is indestructable that's for sure. He continues to cheat death.
I've taken a bunch of pictures with my phone (it still seems a little inappropriate to bust out my paparazzi camera) but for now won't be posting any. They're mostly to send to my brothers who are away and to show Burk when he wakes up. He'll need to remember this one.
Crazy times ahead for sure. Life is a pretty big kick in the face right now.
Friday, June 3, 2011
What's goin' on.
--Carter is now on his second cast. In exactly one week, he had destroyed the first cast enough that they had to take it off (which involved the cast saw--very traumatic) and put on a new one. The good news is that this one is below his knee since he wasn't trying to pull the other one off. The doctor made this one much thicker and we have to try and keep it covered with thick socks all the time. He still doesn't care one bit about it and loves to bang it against the tile, walls, my face....
--I think I educated Mya a little young on how babies are born. It just seemed easier to tell her the truth than to try and come up with something made up. She is now obsessed with talking about her "baby hole". And noted that Carter doesn't have one. Hopefully those conversations stay in our own home. Yeah right.
--Jaida had her last day of school today. When she got in the car she said "finally I don't have to carry a stupid back pack around anymore." Interesting that was the worst part of school. I'm not sure who is more excited for school to be over. I looooooove summer. Lazy mornings. Free schedules. Time to party.
--I took all 3 kids shopping at Walmart today. I'm pretty sure that's as close to hell as I've ever been. I must figure out a better system. Like, not shopping with 3 kids. Funny thing is Carter's by far the easiest one. He still usually chills in the cart. And Jaida is easily the hardest. The girl wants to buy e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g
--Mya no longer says she has to go to the bathroom. Now it's "Mom, I gotta wiz." It bugs me. It just sounds so vulgar. She thinks it's hilarious.
--Jaida is very particular about her outfits lately. I can no longer buy clothes for her. The ones I pick "aren't cute". She's 6. That started waaaaay earlier than I anticipated. We have very different styles. But I do my best to let her express herself as she wishes. Although sometimes I give her an "absolutely not." She doesn't usually argue when I say that. Usually being the key word.
--My girls have been educated on drugs and alcohol at a young age. Mainly because they over hear conversations we have about my brother. But also because I talk to them freely about it. It's NEVER too early to start teaching your kids about that stuff. They're exposed to it younger and younger and you definitely don't want them to not know what to do. Yesterday Mya was telling one of her friends about her Uncle Burk. She announced he eats beer and drugs. Then she says "Mom, how do you drug? I don't know how to drug?" Just struck me as funny. How do you drug??
--Carter is slowly starting to say more words. He communicates most by screaming. But his most used phrases are "No no, don't touch" and "Get down" He knows when to say them and says them often. The kid climbs on everything. And then falls off. I'm constantly worried about more broken bones. He's crazy.
--I'm ready to not feel like I'm going to puke all the time. I hate feeling like I have the flu and knowing the only way to feel a little better is to eat. It's so un-natural. The baby/alien in my stomach is definitely kicking my butt this time. Too bad I have 3 other kids so laying on the couch all day isn't an option. Boo.
--I actually heard Mike say out loud that he would consider running another marathon. That's all I needed. You'll definitely be seeing round two of Mike and marathons sometime in the future. Probably distant future. :)
--The girls announced the other day that I'm a "bad hair doer". Sorry girls, that's not a newsflash for me. The first thing I said when I found out I was pregnant with a girl (Jaida): "Crap, I don't know how to do girl hair." Seriously. That's what I said. Maybe I'll make more effort to learn. Maybe.
--I'm only 13 weeks and I already have a belly. It's gross, really. I guess with four kids, your body just gives up trying to hide it and starts poking out as soon as it get the chance. That, and when I'm pregnant I have NO regard for what and how much I eat. I don't look at the scale when I go to the doctor. I don't care. I'm pregnant. I'm getting fat anyway. Might as well enjoy food for 9 months when I don't have to try and fit into any particular clothes.
--There is a serious neighborhood party going on in my front yard. I just counted 19 kids (many under the age of 6). Hope their parents are paying attention to them because I'm sure not. ;)
--I think I educated Mya a little young on how babies are born. It just seemed easier to tell her the truth than to try and come up with something made up. She is now obsessed with talking about her "baby hole". And noted that Carter doesn't have one. Hopefully those conversations stay in our own home. Yeah right.
--Jaida had her last day of school today. When she got in the car she said "finally I don't have to carry a stupid back pack around anymore." Interesting that was the worst part of school. I'm not sure who is more excited for school to be over. I looooooove summer. Lazy mornings. Free schedules. Time to party.
--I took all 3 kids shopping at Walmart today. I'm pretty sure that's as close to hell as I've ever been. I must figure out a better system. Like, not shopping with 3 kids. Funny thing is Carter's by far the easiest one. He still usually chills in the cart. And Jaida is easily the hardest. The girl wants to buy e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g
--Mya no longer says she has to go to the bathroom. Now it's "Mom, I gotta wiz." It bugs me. It just sounds so vulgar. She thinks it's hilarious.
--Jaida is very particular about her outfits lately. I can no longer buy clothes for her. The ones I pick "aren't cute". She's 6. That started waaaaay earlier than I anticipated. We have very different styles. But I do my best to let her express herself as she wishes. Although sometimes I give her an "absolutely not." She doesn't usually argue when I say that. Usually being the key word.
--My girls have been educated on drugs and alcohol at a young age. Mainly because they over hear conversations we have about my brother. But also because I talk to them freely about it. It's NEVER too early to start teaching your kids about that stuff. They're exposed to it younger and younger and you definitely don't want them to not know what to do. Yesterday Mya was telling one of her friends about her Uncle Burk. She announced he eats beer and drugs. Then she says "Mom, how do you drug? I don't know how to drug?" Just struck me as funny. How do you drug??
--Carter is slowly starting to say more words. He communicates most by screaming. But his most used phrases are "No no, don't touch" and "Get down" He knows when to say them and says them often. The kid climbs on everything. And then falls off. I'm constantly worried about more broken bones. He's crazy.
--I'm ready to not feel like I'm going to puke all the time. I hate feeling like I have the flu and knowing the only way to feel a little better is to eat. It's so un-natural. The baby/alien in my stomach is definitely kicking my butt this time. Too bad I have 3 other kids so laying on the couch all day isn't an option. Boo.
--I actually heard Mike say out loud that he would consider running another marathon. That's all I needed. You'll definitely be seeing round two of Mike and marathons sometime in the future. Probably distant future. :)
--The girls announced the other day that I'm a "bad hair doer". Sorry girls, that's not a newsflash for me. The first thing I said when I found out I was pregnant with a girl (Jaida): "Crap, I don't know how to do girl hair." Seriously. That's what I said. Maybe I'll make more effort to learn. Maybe.
--I'm only 13 weeks and I already have a belly. It's gross, really. I guess with four kids, your body just gives up trying to hide it and starts poking out as soon as it get the chance. That, and when I'm pregnant I have NO regard for what and how much I eat. I don't look at the scale when I go to the doctor. I don't care. I'm pregnant. I'm getting fat anyway. Might as well enjoy food for 9 months when I don't have to try and fit into any particular clothes.
--There is a serious neighborhood party going on in my front yard. I just counted 19 kids (many under the age of 6). Hope their parents are paying attention to them because I'm sure not. ;)
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