So, this is mostly a life update thing but I'm going to add some philosophical and stuff at the end for those interested enough to read all the way through.
I passed losing 100 pounds last week which puts me well over halfway to my goal. Going slower than I like, but, still, as long as I'm still moving in the right direction, it's all good. By the way, for the dieters out there, Kroger's "Slow Churned" [Light] Death By Chocolate ice cream could be the eighth deadly sin and, at only 140 calories a scoop, it's a happy indulgence. And no one's paying me to say it. It's just that damn good.
Had to replace one of my AC units, the one that we've been babying since I moved in in 2004 that goes out repeatedly and takes care of upstairs which is not only much hotter than downstairs but it's where we all are most of the time. Well it died, but at least it happened now, when we had a nice cool week and not in July. I'm hoping the much higher efficiency unit (w/ten years parts AND labor warranty) will also help with cooling bills this summer.
I was taken aback when changing my W-4 from married to single (but otherwise identical) resulted in more than an extra $120 coming out of my paycheck every week (which is why I paid into the IRS last year for the first time in decades). Ouch. Sucks to be a single parent. My hats off to any of you out there doing it on far less than I'm making. I literally have no idea how you manage it.
Was discussing the topic of gay marriage on Gather.com (I rarely go there any more, but I have a bud who knows how to write articles that get discussions going to a frightening degree). Not going to discuss it here because I already have and, really, I didn't have many people arguing with me, not even Relax Max.
But several folks there were up in arms at the notion and after some extended hair rending and teeth gnashing over the increased
moral turpitude that's crept into our society now that we can't beat
blacks and our wives any more with impunity (ah, the good old days,
when children had a 50% chance of living to adulthood and hygiene meant a
monthly soak in a metal basin), one of them got into a long drawn-out rant against science, the kind I see once in a while among the creationist or global climate change naysayers. As I am myself, I noted that there was a level of irony in someone dissing science while using it to communicate, in this case, on the internet.
Here is his carefully quoted response to that [Note that the previous was paraphrased with almost undoubtedly some bias on my part]:
So, now science means anything that involved any sort of scientific or
technological discovery to make? I am "using science" if I drive a car?
Turn on a light? Flick my bic?
I still can't think about it without wiping tears of laughter from my eyes.
Uh, duh? Did he think that stuff grew on trees? Spontaneously fell from the sky like manna?
Now, I'm not equating religious folks with this kind of thinking - most religious people I know personally are perfectly rational reasonable thoughtful people who use religion as a guide to be better people. Can't fault that. But some of the crazies that pop up on talk radio and the internet are freaky out there.
This same guy, later on, said, "Science itself as we know it, was begun by "religious people" . . ." [guffaw, chortle]. While it was true that Christianity, at one point, was "in charge" of science, they were (a) largely basing it on Aristotle (who was not Christian but might have been a very devout pagan for all I know) and (b) did so up through the time called the Dark Ages, largely because science was stagnant in their hands. The name "Dark Ages" was not coincidental. And, while a number of scientists have been and are now devout in their respective religions, I don't think I'm really speaking out of turn when I say several of the organized religions have been basically obstructing science
since the Dark Ages.
Note also, that that's just Western science. I know that, in many early civilizations like the Mayans and Babylonians, science, particularly astronomy, was closely linked with their religion. I haven't looked at the link between science and religion in the Far East Asian cultures, but I wouldn't be surprised to see something similar. (And for those who might thing Western culture dominated science in ancient times, I beg to differ).
But I have seriously digressed.
My point is that people can be awfully harsh with scientists and those implementers of science, engineers, and tend to focus on the evils that have resulted. I don't want to dismiss those, of course. We're not absolved of guilt for our part in that, for what our work facilitated. But I also think that just as religion today shouldn't really be held responsible for some of the more heinous things done in the past in the name of religion (and there are ample examples), scientists might be given a little slack on the less than savory results of our work done in generations past. Not that ills done in the name of religion and murderous/unhealthy science don't go on now as well. They do.
Similarly, just as religion deserves credit for good things that are done, including a significant portion of the relief efforts in some of the more tortured parts of the globe, science deserves note for those activities on the plus side of the scale. And I think that that is often taken for granted.
Some of it is, obviously, medical, things that have transformed the health of humankind in ways that would have amazed people a couple of centuries ago (though it should be noted, again, that various cultures already appreciated some aspects of that, like hygiene, again in certain Asian cultures): vaccines (much maligned but a huge factor in reducing infant mortality and child survival rates), antibiotics, hygiene and pasteurization, analgesics, safe and sterile surgical techniques (now with anesthesia!), clean water supplies and plumbing (which doesn't get enough credit for making changes in our world). When my grandfather was a child, half his siblings didn't make it to adulthood. That wasn't unusual in his day. I can't even imagine it. Two centuries and more back, childbirth was one of the biggest killers of women; now it's far less so (in countries where women can get pre and post natal care). Thank you, biology and medicine.
Manufacturing break-throughs, assembly lines, automation, irrigation and farm machinery have allowed drops in prices and increased affordability in a number of things that used to be in short supply and/or only available for the very rich, like clothing and various (even rare) foods, vehicles and electronics and computers. Thank you engineering.
Material sciences and organic chemistry (particularly plastics) have meant huge breakthroughs in alloys and semiconductors and ceramics/composites and plastics from cookware to bullet-proof vests to surgical implants and fiber optics to nano technology and, again, electronics. They've enabled solar panels and computer supersystems as well as computers that fit neatly on a wrist. Are you glad you can listen to music without having to go the concern hall every time? Thank you material sciences and chemistry.
Like riding in a car rather than horse and buggy? Like having electric lights rather than relying strictly on candles? Like flying in planes? Air conditioning and central heating? Like having access to instant information (cell and internet), weather information, location information? Much of the latter relies on a huge phalanx of satellites made possible by the space programs of many different nations. Thank you, physics and, yes, rocket science and combustive chemistry.
I'm just scratching the surface here, but I don't think it would go amiss, when we start thinking nostalgically about how simple life used to be, we might want to also remember how dangerous it was, how inconvenient, how dirty (even the wealthy), how exhaustive it was for most people, how little time and money was available for luxuries of any kind.
Science and scientists are certainly not free from fault, but there's a sizable debt we all owe to their efforts. Perhaps it wouldn't be amiss to remember it once in a while.
Read more...
I still remember - as just a normal citizen who felt a loss as well.
~M
Thank you for writing on this.
I followed your link to Wayne Hale’s blog and watched the video he linked to. Yeah, that’s not good. And the scary thing is, NASA isn’t the only institution/company that runs that way. I’ve worked in retail for 30 years, and I’ve run into the scenario depicted in the video twice - with FW Woolworth’s and with The Home Depot, two of the worst-run companies I’ve ever had the misfortune to work for and observe. And of course, these days Woolworth’s is defunct and THD massively downsizes every couple of months (and I’ll be willing to bet - you heard it here first - that THD files for Chapter 11 within the next 6 months).
I’m really hoping the scenario in the video isn’t widespread in NASA. If it is, that’s scary! I’ve been through that “proper channels” and “that’s really not how we do things here” BS too many times, that pressure to conform, conform, conform, don’t make waves, don’t stick your head up above the herd. If that’s how NASA’s being run, it needs an overhaul, now. A space program has to, by its very nature, be open to innovation and the open sharing of ideas. If it regularly squashes that, it’s doomed.
What scares me even more is that you’ve run into that pushing safety. Safety should be hard-wired into every consideration NASA makes. If safety concerns are getting the “yeah, yeah, yeah, we know, we’ll deal with it” treatment, something is dreadfully wrong, and something needs to be done to address it. I sincerely hope that the scenario in the video isn’t widespread in NASA. And if it is, I hope Wayne sent a copy of that video to every director in NASA.
And finally, big hugs to you on a day that I know is a bad, bad anniversary for you.
These we were losses for all of us, M. This is our program; it belongs to all of us. This wasn’t my personal loss. It was a loss for all of us.
Thank you for your kind words.
I think this kind of thinking is more widespread than NASA, assuredly. If other agencies and government offices (or even the public as a whole) were willing to question authority more seriously, perhaps we wouldn’t be in the wars we’re in or the financial nightmare we’re in.
Truth is, I think this kind of thinking is widespread in many places, many avenues.
I don’t want you to think I spent eight years in safety and was always obstructed - far from it. There are good reasons for pushback as well, but, one thing I discovered was that, if I could convince the program that what I wanted WAS the right thing to do, I never had to fight that battle again. In many organizations, that isn’t the case. And they didn’t have to be told again. They made that change part and parcel of their existing workload.
There are some great people working for NASA, some of the most remarkable minds and people, most with superlative ethics. But, no, there are still problems. I hope we learn from videos like this.
And thanks for the hugs. I’ll take ‘em.
“I know we would have tried, would have pulled out all the stops, killed ourselves to save them if we had known what was to happen. I believe that absolutely.”
Stephanie, I believe this absolutely too. I have tremendous admiration for people in NASA and don’t question their dedication. The problem is that it is a human organization, that has inherent human problems. Yet the amazing part for me is is not the flaws, but seeing people rise above their short-comings to do incredible things on behalf of others. I have the same respect for firefighters, policemen, and soldiers who risk their lives for the sake of others. Each of these organizations, like NASA, has flaws, sometimes deep flaws. But despite the flaws, there are individuals and teams who perform astonishing feats that make me ever grateful. Not complacent. But grateful.
Peace to you on this terrible day.
Thanks, Brian.
Definitely a harsh way to make the point that safety has to come first
I had no connection to any of it and it sickened me…. can’t imagine how people that worked anywhere near any of it managed… the horrible sense of loss
I’m not sure what I can say that hasn’t already been said.
I hope in the future you have a chance to change things and see your impact on them–to know that what you’ve learned, that what you’re willing to share now, prevents something much worse from unfolding. That you can see the fruits of the changes you’ve made already, and that you find peace from it.
Thank you for writing this. My thoughts are with you.
Oh, wow, Stephanie. Such a personal recount of the events of this tragedy. Since it was your flight and you knew the crew personally, I know this had to be really hard to write about… I’m so sorry. I hope, as you do, that enough was learned to prevent a recurrence. Thanks for sharing this.
Davida
Learning by attrition is always painful, flit. Thanks
My thanks also to you, Davida and ravyn. I’m not alone in being torn by this. Every year at the memorial, tears are shed. Nor am I alone in wanting this to be the last tragedy NASA ever has, to honor those who died and to reward the trust placed in us by the people who fund this: the citizens of the United States. This is their space program. I appreciate your sympathy.
It was a sad day for all. I love the space flight program and I was at work when this happened. Thanks for sharing this post.
This was as truly horrible tragedy. Our astronauts are some of the best, brightest, and bravest people of our nation. To lose any of them is just unrecoverable.
Thanks for writing this point to remind us all of the anniversary.
-Michael
Muckbeast - Game Design and Online Worlds
http://www.muckbeast.com
I wasn’t expecting to read a personal account of what happened. I thought it was just about the tragedy, not such a close take on it. It does make a huge difference for with time, these things become numbers and then we forget the lessons again.
Thanks for taking the time to write about this. May we all remember.
It is a hard thing for me to write about and I still get weepy when I do. Heck, I still get weepy when a Shuttle lands safely on the runway.
I mentioned, on a previous post, that we had a sacred trust to do everything in our power to keep these brave and talented people alive. I sincerely hope I never have to add another sad anniversary to my list.
Thank you for the kind words, mpaulin, Cambios and TLE.
I’m going to say something totally obvious here that is in no way intended to diminish the feelings everyone must have remembering incredibly brave people losing their lives in such a “spectacular” way. The fatality rate per astronaut has obviously been way higher than the fatality rate per traveller on the highways. But if we only cared about numbers of fatalities, we would put even more effort into reducing the more than 40,000 fatalities that occur each year on USA roads alone. And I don’t remember the details of the helicopter crash that killed the last two you mention, Stephanie, but somehow that makes me feel even more sick than the immediate Columbia tragedy itself, because it should surely have been easier to avoid. Ultimately I find it completely astonishing that anyone makes it out into space and back again, ever.
There are thousands of preventable deaths each year for any number of causes, Adrian, and I don’t think your comment diminishes anything. I try to do my part there, too, but driving sensibly and when necessary only and I never EVER drive while impaired. But your point is not lost.
There are people dying all over the world who don’t have to. Their causes and their deaths are not less tragic and I think you were right to remind us of that.
I remember it well, I was stunned wen I saw it on tv. The report you linked to was very interesting. There will be more loss of life no matter how vigilant everybody is,when you are talking about space there are just to many unknowns. In Gus Grissom’s own words,
“The conquest of space is worth the risk of life, our God given curiosity will force us to go there ourselves, because in the final analysis only man can fully evaluate the Moon in terms understandable to other men.” you can replace moon with whatever term you want, thing is there is a risk and the astronauts now about it and accept it, we can only minimize it, not remove it by being ever vigilant.
I agree with that. All the more reason, since we can’t remove risk, not to let our own actions add to it.