the one about my scary tutor... oh i just had to post this about lim chee han my hs102 tutor!!

he's so freaky!! his tutorial lessons are scarefests!

and apparently there are actually people who find him cute. ewww.

so today it was his lesson so maybeline and i wasted time by going to the toilet at the start of the tutorial. so we had just returned and maybe he was saying something but i wasnt paying attention. then he mentioned the tutorial question and im like *barely audible but deep sigh* and he caught on to it and immediately he goes "it's not that bad right jean.." and im like...*weak smile* and proceed to unpack my stuff, totally zoning out as to what he was saying until i realised all eyes were on me n maybeline. and i looked at him and he continued just looking back with that look we all interpret as sinister. so we thought it was nothing but later we realised that he was actually saying that we had done well for our hs101 test...

so through the tutorial it was rather quiet so i was like talking abit to alter the awkward silence; once ppl started talking im buried in my notes and dont look up.

LCH: "some of you are unwilling sociology student...."
me: (thinking) "eh. that's what i wrote on my blog! thank goodness he doesnt know that socio wasnt my first choice....."
LCH: " jean u wanted to go to business school rite?"
me: *SHOCKED SILENCE* nods
LCH: *looking all smug and all*

but i refuse to feed his ego by asking him how he knew..no way.  ¶ 3:27 AM 0 Comments

  the one where i climbed the yunnan garden gate... wowhee!! finally had supper at yunnan garden ah fang place!!

and boy was today a crowd! there was me, xiaowen, xingyee, lizhen, yeong min & jessica!! it's just so great that so many ppl who didnt know evbd else can just be brought together to have supper!! asked zhiwei earlier cos i didnt wanna walk back to hall alone and he told me he had just had mac.-_- oh well but i understand..i mean it's all girls and he doesnt know any of them. well i guess he was nice enough to ask me to ring him up if i didnt dare walk back myself but u know who're even NICER?? LIZHEN & YEONGMIN!! they walked me back to my hall after supper even though they had just had their jog. :))) thanks dearies!!

oh we climbed the proverbial yunnan garden gate too!! and boy it was tough..it was easier climbing back in i think though i guess it was supposed to be harder..oh well. at least i can say i climbed the gate before!! feel abit guilty cos xingyee had a minor fall from the gate and sorta scratched herself i think cos i was the one who had convinced her to go. sorry girl...

well the plaster prata was good! and shared the minced pork noodles with ah wen too. nice~~ well if it werent so far away and blocked by a gate...

and seriously bloody hell some people should know better than to complain when im the one going to all the trouble walking there and climbing the bloody gate and buying food back. hello the least u could fucking do is wait and not whine about being tired. asshole. u who dont even ask when u go out for food. selfish bugger.

oh skipped the word and image lecture again. well it was a cold day and u know about my urge to shit everytime the temperature drops so i figured i'd be better off in the hall. indeed. crapped twice in hall alone. so had to be on time for badminton training. which is at 6.45pm. didnt really have to be on time cos i had actually alr told khai chian i'd be late (my lecture ends at 6.30pm) BUT zhiwei had to see me just as i was coming out from the toilet. DAMN. well training didnt start on time too anyway...we were the earliest there; khai chian hadnt even reached. and he's said to be a sucker for punctuality. well training today was good!! there were too many players and too few courts so we had time to rest in between. which rocks. after that we even played a couple of matches, a first during training. yay!! if only every training were like this one!

and congrats to tok who got her license! we're counting on u for supper k!!  ¶ 2:51 AM 0 Comments

  the one where im totally chilled out.. i have so much free time on my hands today!!

finished the bloody HS103 quiz. turns out he just wanted to scare us into studying; the test was only mcq. thank goodness! then for HS101 it's the presentation thing which we've already done so basically it's chill time. HS103 is cancelled cos of the test so hooray!! there's only the journal left to do for HS102 and guess what? i've finished it!!

and it's true. im hexed. everytime i wanna study somebody HAS to come into my room!! yesterday tiff was over in my room eating instant noodles cos we were bloody hungry and hadnt had our dinner. then chun kiat was passing by, so we talked awhile, then he started to talk to tiff abt being the choir conductor and stuff. and im like sitting there waiting for them to finish so that i could study. but no..the talk went on and on and on....until i couldnt stand it and just took out my stuff to study. i mean...seriously!! but he's promised to gimme his whole 'friends' series 1 to 10 cos he's gonna convert to dvd or sth so..oh well... :)

saw kok guan on the bus on my way to bbdc for my theory practice. hmm. he's one of the few guys i know who has pierced ears and dont u think it's a shame to have pierced ears and NO dangling earrings?! haha~

met xw and lz at jp for sushi at fiesta! so now no more sushi craving! next xw and i are going to suntec on friday for french food. mmmm....

and supper with the gals again on thursday nite!

meanwhile im so chillin i think i might actually read the picture of dorian gray. :)))  ¶ 8:18 PM 0 Comments

  the one where it's finally over!! yays!! MAF's finally over!!

im just so relieved. no more scrambling for dance and choir practices. no more late late late nights with nothing done. yay!!

and im hungry. no food was leftover. :((( damn.

zhiwei has titbits i hope.

dang instant noodles really isnt good for health.

have a horrid horrid test to study for tomorrow..DANG.

so sleepy. mascara's killing me. and it's so strong i cant remove it!!

oh i got my HS101 test result! i was so upset upon seeing the C for the essay and im like wtf man. thn she gave us our overall result and i got A-!! thanks to the mcqs cos i got them all right and thanks to the curve thingy....whew.  ¶ 11:49 PM 0 Comments

  the one where we had dry run for MAF... achey bones..

just had our first dry run for MAF.

i thought our dance was alrite. but it was damn embarrassing when the new dancers made our entrance. to a jazzy pink-panther-ish tune no less. eeek. nothing much to say about choir. except that the safest place is actually the most dangerous place. i thought it was best to stand in the 2nd row cos u're blocked in front and behind. in the end the 1st row and the 3rd row moved downstage. guess where the 2nd row is standing. yes a single lone row up on stage. the hell people arent gonna notice if we sing wrongly.

OH kbox-ed today with ah wen!! im like ready to join the tenors now. *croaks* fun fun fun!!! would have been perfect if we could have sang all the way to 7 cos bloody hell i had to come back for dance at 7. DAMN.

abit pissed. not with dance though. with someone.

imhungry. again. if any of u wanna visit me save the gifts; just bring food k?  ¶ 12:23 AM 0 Comments

  the one where im relieved of 2 presentations... yays!!!!!!!!!!!

2 presentations completed today!! i feel SO relieved. haha~

had training again just now. tired..but i have to say that khai chien is pretty good. it took him a relatively short amount of time to realise that my wrist was weak, which is true. hmm. i have newfound respect for him. and he kept saying that my wrist was too small and that i should eat more, especially supper. i DO eat ok. and ok i admit my wrist's small but..?? when u eat more the fats get deposited at the tummy dearie NOT THE WRIST. well apparently he's got this exercise to strengthen the wrist. GREAT. now i not only have an inproportionate arm i also have an inproportionate wrist.

have to go for the publications photo thingy. dang. could've enjoyed my night watching videos..

hope it doesnt take too long.

in the meantime. IM HUNGRY!!!

but im glad as well. the week has turned out fine!

and i realise that siraj is actually right..i dont really wanna make new friends..i dont really wanna know my socio ppl.. hmm...?  ¶ 10:17 PM 0 Comments

  the one where im in depression... im feeling damn horrible tonight.

i miss home i guess. i dread school. ultimately i feel horribly lonely.

tiff gave me a lil' pep talk just now. felt just a wee bit better to have someone to talk to. but is this hall life? is this what i had expected of hall life? honestly i thought it'd be fun. now it's like there's fun but the seniors are the ones having it not us. it's terribly dejecting when u hear bursts of laughter coming from the seniors' room and u're not part of it. maybe we need a party soon. maybe we need our gossip session soon but even then...

i dont even feel like talking to my roomie.

and i wonder. is it better to not know and realise, to know but to pretend not to or to know but to blatantly ignore. i dont know which is best but i do know the latter is the worst.

dont feel like doing anything. i dont even know whether what im saying should be published in this blog. used to be able to do it; blogging used to be my release, now im not sure anymore. im not sure of anything anymore.

was i ever?

is it really worth it to be bogged down with so much hall activities just so that i would have a chance to stay next year? undeniably there have been fun times in hall and i got to know some really great people. sure i made friends but all these at the expense of me having a life out of school. my whole life revolves around school now. is this how uni life should be? i thought it was supposed to be wholistic development but how is there going to happen with me cooped up in school all the time.

perhaps i really need some 'me' time.

fuckfuckfuck.  ¶ 1:18 AM 0 Comments

  the one where im in denial... it's officially 17th september. im officially 19. im officially in denial. because im 18.

thanks dearies for ur presents!! u know i love yall!!

supposed to wake up at 10.30am for my driving lesson at 12.05pm. i woke up at 12.05pm instead. had to rush down to bbdc in a taxi. and the weird taxi driver uncle got me to help him exchange for small change at a petrol station. ?! hello!! i wanted to tell him i was in rush but i figured it would take up too much time. weirddddd~

went to hall with instant noodles and sushi and lunch for xw and myself. speaking of which: ah wen!! ur towel and toothbrush are still in my room!!!

xw left as i went for dance. oh i finally could catch the beat and all!! im so proud of myself!! well then there was the stage cheoreography and everything and we ended at 12+am instead of 11. -.-

well then unless i wanna do the Se7en thingy that kimbo so kindly passed to me i think i'll just end here. haha~ i'll do it sometime ok kim!!  ¶ 2:18 AM 0 Comments

  the one where i weep... oh man. that entry about my busiest day was a lie. TODAY was my busiest day..

woke up at 9am today. considering i had had only 5 hours of sleep, i think 2alarm clocks and 1 wake-up call was pretty mild..

reached pj abt 10.30am. which technically was 1/2hr late but...oh well..had a late breakfast of canteen food. which was really not bad compared to our hall standard. and i remember we didnt use to complain about the food in pj..food wasnt all that important to us then. it was the company. but now that we're in hall people are complaining about canteen food all the time. doesnt that speak of the company we're having??

went to LJS at lot1 to do some work observation thingy. went for dance; dinner-ed with zoe, then came back for choir. im utterly drained. my eyes are in a perpetually half-closed position.

cant help comparing jc life and uni life and seriously i miss being in JC. doesnt matter that it's a bottom half jc like pj, doesnt matter that no one wears the uniform properly, doesnt even matter that ppl dont wear their ties on monday. i like being in a school system where everything is worked out for you and tutors actually KNOW you and CARE about u. gosh cant believe im almost tearing typing this out. in uni it's like u're all grown up. it's a small campus that's a reflection of the society outside. everyone treats u like an adult and that's just it. i dont wanna be treated like an adult!! i dont feel ready to be one!! tutors dont give a shit about u and basically u're on ur own baby. u either swim or drown but no one gives a damn about teaching u how to swim first.

talked to mr wong and siraj today. and seriously had sucha great time. i mean u know mr wong..he's just so...humourous. and he actually remembered that im taking sociology. see how much i love him. and there's siraj of course. get such a great feeling of triumph everytime i go 'eh siraj...' and him being him of course caught on to it in a fraction of a second. haha. see how much i lurve him!! see how much i love THEM!! see how much i love being in PJ!!

i vividly remember what siraj told us as we were struggling and fumbling through our prelims. 'remember. after u get through this and go to uni, life is good. i tell u life is good man' but that's a lie siraj!! how can life be good when u dont even REALLY make friends??!! everytime before and after tutorials it's like 'hi', 'bye'. nice friends. and i reall like maybeline and all but we werent exactly EXTREMELY close in the first place, plus she's not staying in hall so it kinda just makes her my course-mate. sure we stick together and gossip and talk and all but at the end of the day it remains that we arent that close. thank goodness for hall. but then again...siraj says i dont mingle around enough; that im not friendly, and that i always give people that ' eww dont u dare come near me u'r nt worthy. urgh' *rolls eyeballs* kinday look. but seriously i dont. well yar i know i do that all the time dont have to remind me but im not so dumb as to do that in a tutorial class with less than 20ppl. im not.

i seriously miss jc life. we were just looking down at the hall where the tables and chairs were arranged for the prelim exams and reminiscing about when we were seated one whole row down and the whole row had the same waterbottles. funky yeah. and then there was the time when we combined both our iqzero and sicko cliques to form sickening iq. when we fooled siraj on april fools' that shit was getting married. and he spent one whole period with his head in his hands and going on and on about the dangers of marrying young. we really did stuff together as a class; lunching, outings, studying...now i cant even find someone in the same course to study with me in sch and full-strength outings are rare now. oh man i think im really gonna cry soon.

and we were talking about lonliness in uni. not once in jc did i feel lonely. now i do all the time. it's even hard to find people for meals. and it doesnt stop there. in uni it's an icy kind of lonliness. even when u're surrounded with people u still feel lonely. no such thing in jc. JCs are so small that almost everyone knows everybody else, at least by sight. a construction worker can come into my lecture and i would think he's a student.

im feeling really low now...i wanna go back to jc. :(  ¶ 12:42 AM 0 Comments

  the one about shopping with s13 girlies... yay yay yays!!! finally went towning with the S13 girlies!!

oh ok this is so embarrassing. kolay kept telling me to meet them at cartel so i kept thinking that it was the cartel at cine. anyway they told me to stop at dhoby ghaut so i thought that dhoby ghaut was the mrt station for cine. so when i exited the mrt entrance i was looking around and like 'this is nowhere near cine!!' thinking that i had come out of the wrong exit i phoned kolay 'kolay..im lost..' and she even came out to look for me. that was when i realised that they were talking about the cartel at PS...*faints* so embarrassed!!

well talked, mucked ard, lena sean and jocelyn left first, leaving my kolay sook ah wen n yanyan!! walked around PS, didnt get anything so we walked to paragon cos ah wen wanted to show us the heels she had in mind. wellll...she didnt get it in the end..kolay left us at PS that horrible girl. didnt wanna continue shopping with us..

well then we walked to far east where the real shopping began. i got a sportsbra from nike, a tube top, a tshirt and earrings!! nice nice!! until i realised when i came back that weiling had just bought the same tube top yesterday and her counterpart got it like last last week. to think that i couldnt get the green one i wanted at heeren and had to go all the way to far east to find one that looked EXACTLY the same. screw. as if having the same one as weiling isnt enough it's the same one as *AHEM*. YUCK. MAJOR YUCK.

anyway had a lovely lovely time with the S13 girlies!! should have more outings in future where the no-shows will turn up ok!!

oh yar...going back to pj tmr i guess. too early though..plus i still have to go to long john's and be back in hall by 4. URGH  ¶ 11:25 PM 0 Comments

  the one about my official recess... so after steamboat we were supposed to meet at 55 for the 'tale of 2 sisters' but evbd seemed to have something on and would arrive later. grew tired of waiting so i asked longteng to go watch with me at our 56 tv lounge. turns out that zoe's friend was there already and we were later joined by qingxiang awhile later. everybody was perplexed bythe show and left scratching their heads. haha! that was how i felt when i watched it at the cinema too!!

had our vanity session without sharon yesterday *raised eyebrows* talked, gossiped, complained. and LONGTENG once again turned up for our gossip session cos his roomie had locked him out of the room..lol..

the gurls left at 3 or 4+. i slept at maybe 5. dont ask me what i was doing in the meantime i have no idea myself.

and due to some circumstances i MAY i stress MAY have to revert to the old blog for awhile...i hope u girls still remember the password...

ok girls here's my new schedule::
monday: dance 7pm to 11pm.
tuesday: outing with S13 lovelies! 12.30pm at dhoby ghaut
wednesday: dance 7pm to 11pm. choir 8.45pm to 11pm. im prob going for choir
thursday: project group meeting at woodlands at 11am. badm traning at hall10 at 6pm.
friday: dance 7pm to 11pm. HOME SWEET HOME.  ¶ 10:37 PM 0 Comments

  the one about my busy holiday... i had my busiest holiday today.

and i have to admit i was abit over-excited about recess cos i started watching 'Shuttle' at 4am with robin in my room. it ended at 6am so u know how late i slept. well then there's this WEILING!! she was like alrite with robin being in the room when she slept and he was like 'close the door and turn off the lights leh!' cos it was a horror show and weiling was like almost complying!! and cos robin was there how could i have told her outright that how would it look like when a guy is in a girls' room at 4 in the morning with the door closed and the lights out?? like HELLO?! i have enough stuff going on for me as it is already.

thn i was like so afraid after the show i was telling weiling "eh weiling can i sleep with u tonight?" and she turned over and simply said "no space" and continued sleeping. so in the end i slept with the table lights on.

woke up at like 2+ to go to ssc to hand in the payments and stuff.

got back at like 3+. so freaking hot i slept until 4.45pm when i was supposed to meet christina n shuwei to go buy the steamboat stuff. well shuwei got me really annoyed at ntuc i hope it wasnt too obvious that all i wanted to so was to leave him there.

lucky for us robin had the car today n he called just as we were leaving ntuc so we got him to fetch us back..

prepared and had steamboat until 9. had to rush to dance studio for dance practice.

all the way until 11pm.

so we're watching tale of 2 sisters later. and having our gossip session later..

what a day.

and seriously im FUCKING PISSED with all the fucking rumours going around. there's NOTHING between him n i why does evbd have to find something to talk about at the expense of us?? like he's got a girlfriend for god's sake and he's NOT exactly my type. he's a really nice person and i think he's caring towards everyone and i really like him. as in a very good friend and senior. but now that things have come to this it's fucking difficult to talk to him in public with all the other seniors mummering about 'chicken biscuits'. it's saddens me that now our only conversations are online. i feel like i've lost a friend.  ¶ 11:40 PM 0 Comments

  the one where i welcome my hols.. ok. my holiday officially starts NOW!!! YAYS!!!

skipped the word and image lecture cos i was just too tired to go. anyway i didnt think it was worth it to wait for 1hr to attend a 40min lecture which i would most probably sleep through. so there. anyway saw zhiwei at the bustop. he was all bright and perky, amazing considering the fact that he slept later than me and i was looking like a walking corpse. plus he was going for soccer tryouts. hai...it's so not fair.

now i feel like i have alot of time on my hands. which is good. good. just feels kinda weird. been a long time since i had nothing to do.

everybody says i look terribly worn out. i know i know. that's y i need my masks. that's y i need my daily dosage of laughter. that's y i need ur chicken essence kolay!!!

have i even started on my recess?? it's not even a recess anymore.

*deep deep sigh*

oh satisfied my craving for don's chicken pie. it's really good. brought one back for the blk ppl too. felt like a really nice person. not that im not. just that i suddenly feel exceptionally good about myself...haha.

got my masks also!! finally gonna have vanity session on friday!! after steamboat after dance prac.

welcome to my hols.  ¶ 8:47 PM 0 Comments

  the one where i am finally relaxed... wow i MUST blog about how many people i saw on-campus yesterday! and all from the walk from the innovation centre bustop to LT26.

maybeline didnt come to sch yesterday so it was me myself and i. walking along the sheltered walkway from the bustop to canteen b i saw huimin's roomate denice, walked abit further on and i saw zhi wei. walking through the canteen i saw sharon and xingyee together!! turns out they're from the same tutorial group! walked up the stairs to the atm machines and i saw shu min. by then i was already like 'what is this?!' and it doesnt end here! walking to the lt i saw huimin with a guy TALLER than her, then i saw weiling!! like....?! 7 people!! like is that a record or what.

well so i survived today. went for badm for awhile thn scooted back for choir. like hello between trainings and choir i'd take choir anytime baby.

well apparently im not getting away so easily. badm training during recess week. YUCK.

skipped pyscho tutorial when i realised it was a GE. which is not counted towards my GPA. anyway i wasnt really prepared for it. urgh. in case u're wondering YES word and image IS my PE. that just sucks. big time. real bad.

so maybe we're not getting don's chicken pie tmr but we're still going out to bugis for my face masks!! yays! love xuanie!! *huge grin* havent been out for a loooooong time...

haha im so happy! so all i have to do today are 2 more precises and im done for the tutorials! wheeeee!!

oh the hs101 test today was alrite. the essay wasnt too bad though i did NOT study for it..so now it's basically 1 down 4 to go. but wait. i juz saw the points breakdown for hs102 and there's NO MIDTERM!! plus hs103's quiz is like 2 weeks after recess and based on some readings. and word and image is only an assignment of the appreciation of a painting so basically i only have 2 more quizzes, one of which is a 60mcq thingy!! i love my modules.  ¶ 12:26 AM 0 Comments

  the one about my hectic schedule... it's a crazy warped world out there.

reading newspapers online depresses me.

apparently i missed the psycho lecture which was supposed to be LAST thursday not today. and there i was thinking i was right and taunting hao jie about his first class honours. hah.

word and image lecture supposed to be extended but terence dawson actuall forgot. oh man as if he isnt already lazy enough..

knocked out once i reached my room for about 2 hours.

apparently weilian won. all i can say is good luck to the record company marketing him.

tiredddd.

will be busy busy busy during recess doing research for HS101 project, preparing for tests. got 2 presentations on the same day the week after recess. darn.

and HS101 test is next week. i've got to answer 25mcq, 5 short answer questions about definitions and one 2-paged essay all in 1 hour. good grief.  ¶ 12:12 AM 0 Comments