Just realized the last time I blogged was almost 4 months ago? Quite long... I almost forgot that I have a blog. haha~ now I'm back!!!

Dear readers, I'm gonna flood you with all the emo posts again [though I think no one is still following my blog now lol~], but this is the only way I get rid of all the negative charges to be positive and cheerful again in life =)

Seriously, I had alot running in my head while I was driving back home just now, and now I forgot everything... LOL~~ it's ok, let me try :P

Sometimes I just wonder if I'm not good enough. This is the first time I doubt myself. Am I not good enough for the guy(s) I like? Am I not pretty enough? Am I not hot enough? Am I not intelligent enough? Am I not behaving well enough? Am I not having a good personality? Why can't I find a guy who really likes me for who I am? and a guy who's willing to go through with me whatever I am having now...

I know I used to have found one, and I let go. That was dumb. Now that time can't turn back, but I'm still waiting for him. He's the only person I can foresee myself end up being together with.

I used to think relationship is just an extra thing, though now I still think the same. But having someone by my side and to go through the hardship with me has become more important to me. Someone who does not only KNOW my situation, but also understands and empathizes, someone who can listen to me and go through everything with me. It's so hard to find someone like this. But God is always here, answering to my prayers, opening the doors and walking with me. At least I still have God, which I'm so thankful for.

Feel like that's all I wanna write now, but don't know how to close it. Haha~ Letz just leave it like that and don't judge my writing skills ok? :P

Till then, *cheers*

I have finally made this decision and executed it. I am not sure if this is right... But... never try never know...

I hope you're always doing fine

After that car accident, the wound on my face has now turned into a scar...
I'm feeling so uncomfortable with myself... Everyday seeing the scar, I feel like I'm so ugly. I have no confidence anymore. Even make up can't cover it, it only makes the scar less obvious, but it's still visible.

I'm only 20 this year... Why should I have the scar on my face? It has made my life so miserable... I'm not the young, bright and charming girl anymore... I'm just an ordinary girl with a scar on the face... My life could have been better if I didn't have the scar...

The person who caused the accident should be responsible for it, everyone said so. But I didn't really go after him, I knew his car was very bad too. In fact, he didn't wanna bear the responsibility as well. What else can I do?

How long is it gonna take for the scar to go away? Probably forever... I asked about laser scar removal, it could be effective, but the side effects could be great too. Also, it's expensive. Like around 2k? 2k may be very little to many people, but to me... that amount of money could be used on something more important, like my education. Cause well you know... I take care of all the bills on my own. But in a long run, it could be a good investment. Having a good and clean face might bring me more and better job opportunities. Hmmm... I'm still considering...

All I know is I don't feel good about myself like how I used to... Low self-esteem... Poor self-concept...

I'm dead~

What's next? MY BIRTHDAY!!!! haha~ Thanks to all who wished me and celebrated with me! Truly appreciate it... it's like... you know you're not alone! Haha~~ Didn't upload photo of my birthday to facebook this time... simply because it's all too messy. Guess I should just do it here.

8 Oct - First celebration with share group members ^o^ Lee Jet, Cassie, Yee Ching, Soo Hoon, Ricky & Chee Man

Thanks my lovely bro and sis!


Haha~ All trying to pose with the souvenirs Soo Hoon and I bought from bangkok :P


birthday cake and birthday girl =D


The cake box is somehow cute, we all decided to turn it into a birthday card! LOL~ All signed on the box!


Cassie boiled red bean soup for us... practicing to be a mama already... LOL


9 Oct - Second round, was invited by Tow Guan to this dinner and dance, met Sylvia and Bryan there, those random acquaintance I just met that day also sang me a birthday song... LOL thank you so much~~~ =D

All the performers


This ballroom performance was AWESOME!!! I was so inspired to take up ballroom lesson! :P


It's too blur to see, but believe me, this guy is HOT!!! LOL~


Open dance floor, but apparently I knew nobody at the party, so I didn't get to dance much :(


9 Oct - Third round with my most beloved buddies - Patricia, Yee Shuian, Sie Lein

Thanks for ta pao-ing this taufu fa from snowflake for me! Though I never like taufufa from Snowflake, but that tasted extraordinarily sweet because it's you guys who bought for me =D


Chocolate cake!!! *yummy*


Yee Shuian is always so creative! I love it!


That's how Sie Lein made the mushroom cake... LOL


Happy Birthday PAT!!!! We turned 20 finally! LOL


Really love all the small small things Yee Shuian made <3 href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNHU0e9Fcdh6KO9bb6jqfr3LT9BcUAUkg2swY0exnDtczNks4sQr94i4fOFXRk2_ozBj9VQ7kBWMXBtBDvLeqtTZGst8G6w7wCtNezZkv56gEIcwxGgSaqd_BkOHQtabLSTAidj6jL-EM/s1600/66025_1667898895794_1186976942_31905215_2688918_n.jpg">
Only 4 of us made it to the 'gathering' this time... Really sad... Our gang is getting smaller and smaller because everyone's studying abroad :(


be silly for the last time before 20 :P


what is this la wei...? only our teeth and cake... LOL


making wishesssss~


The first time 3 of us are in dress at the same time... haha~ we've really grown up! LOL


16 Oct - Celebration with college friends - Shu Er, Yen Sin, Andrew & Jack =D

eating sushi in pavilion







Then went to have a drink at 'chatime', the pearl milk was awesome!












Thanks for the present!!! Love it so much!!!


Then we went to the library for second round... Shu Er even posted this to her facebook status: Exam is coming soon, we're still in the library... LOL~~~


Shu Er's face turned red very soon, she took only few sips of Erdinger...



Also, thank you everyone who wished me! It was indeed a BLAST! lol~
Now a new decade of mine began... I feel so old already because I've stepped into my 20s... But still, I'm gonna live my life to the fullest! :D

It's been a month since I last updated. Hmmm... What should I write about first? Probably the bangkok trip? LOL~ I know it's looooong time ago already. Well, I believe you have seen the photo in my facebook already. Seriously, I wasn't that excited when I knew I was going to Bangkok. I've never had any desire for travelling all this while, thus going to bangkok this time was like...*shrug* Probably also because the trip was all planned by my aunt, and I didn't have to do much preparation besides packing luggage and catching the flight. Truth to be told, though the clothes there are soooooo super cheap, but I didn't buy alot. There are so many varieties, but all are quite the same style... the bangkok style. Anyway, I enjoyed the trip as well ^o^

耶和华祝福满满!!!!!

我的前路也许颠簸不平，也许满有荆棘，但神的祝福却如泉水一般漫溢在我的生命中，多得我也招架不住。有时候我们也许会经历空虚期，未看见神的作为，但我从不疑惑，从不彷徨，从不质问，因为我相信神会按照他的时间和旨意，将满满的祝福赐给我，所以我从不惧怕。

神啊，你对我不离不弃，你如此的爱我，你如此的看顾我，我的生命充满着罪，充满着神你不喜悦的作为，我如此的不配的，但你依然将你满满的祝福赐给我，神啊，你叫我如何能不爱你，你叫我如何能不回应你的爱，你叫我如何能离开你？

神啊，我爱你！

Went to Shuian's house to celebrate Mid-Autmn Festival, actually just another excuse for us to meet up and celebrate Gabriel's birthday. LOL~ Thought of doing something different :P

When I was telling one of my friends that I was going to my friend's house to play lanterns and candles to celebrate mid-autumn festival, he was like: "oh boring~" haha~~~~


makan-ing... actually this pic, they are all PRETENDING to be natural... LOL~

But you know what, it's not about what we do, it's WHO we do it with. Frankly speaking, we didn't really play with candles and lanterns, we only used up not more than 10 lanterns and probably 2 packets of candles? We didn't light up lanterns and hang around the garden or what... We didn't have very great food for dinner as well, we only had pizzas, mooncakes and chinese tea? LOL~ But we had GREAT FUN!!! It's about the people we hang out with!




Pizza, Pasta, Chinese Tea & Mooncakes, a fusion of chinese and western food LOL

We celebrated Gabriel's birthday with mooncake! Yea, it's also a kind os cake right? haha~ and one candle for him! He's as perasan as he always is... When we were simply lighting up the candles, he was like: "oh now celebrate my birthday arh?" LMAO~!!! and alot more!!! But he's cute! and we just love him the way he is ;)





Seriously, I feel like the next time we must celebrate the birthdays more properly :P

We walked around Shuian's house with lanterns and we had to keep re-lighting the candles in the lanterns. Haha~ Everytime walking around Shuian's housing area is like some house exhibitions... cause there are really all nice and grand houses.


This is when I on the flash


And this is when i off the flash... You know what is it? It's a swimming pool!!!! LOL~~

We ate, we talked, we celebrated Gabriel's birthday, we played candles & lanterns, we walked around, we took pictures, we had a great time! Oh! and we learned a new word from Hua Chern! 'Pe Ce' in mandarin, derived from Hokkian 'Pik Cik'... Haha~ What kind of language is that?? LMAO~

Why did we still carry lanterns and walk around while we're not young for it anymore? Cause we LOA! "Lack of Attention"!!! haha~ While we were walking, one of Shuian's neighbours was like: "wah~ play lanterns arh? so fun!" We even asked his daughter to join us!

Actually, when we first graduated from high schools, we might want to try out many things that we couldn't do it while we're still under age. For example, go clubbing or drinking. Or what we might not have been exposed to previously. But when we slowly grow older, especially when we're reaching 20, we feel so old and then we want to do things that we can only do it when we're young, or you'll be laughed at for still doing it at such an old age. LOL~ So youngsters, treasure your youth and don't go too fast, enjoy your teenage time! My friend who said playing candles and lanterns is boring, apparently he's still too young, he has more time to waste than I do. LOL~

I wish we could do the same thing next year! Shall we? ;)


oh sexy... LOL~




Pineapple? LOL



Hua Chern's lantern is burnt!!! haha~


Defintely love this pic ;) <3