Sinful roxxors!! I wub ma guild <3 them =".="!" request ="P">:3 And today we pwnt them porings asses! Sinful totally roxxors. This is the first time i've seen sinful soo alive. And im so proud of them I wub you guys <3 And zeph's back then I have to return his gods soon. TT Cant be strong nemore.. Booo Oh wells just find a way to donate =P

Woooter zoozors! Broke up wit nike! Yahoo! Because of hish gheyness EW. Fancy finding spys to spy on meh. Gheyishness. what a fggt. Were koo now. =) And alex!!! <3 =D muhahah im a ladee pimp! Love me if yoo dare. Rofl! Z0mg! Rawr! Im feeling lucky today! Muahah! I got gtb with a trade of an alice pet! wtf! Zuahah! And a free blush and +8 Buckler! A 100m zennies! A advance +10 items! muhahah!! Z0mg! hahhahah. *grins* thats all i can do hahhaha! and and i made a bandage without worries. HAH! Lucky meh! But item wipe's gonna be here sooon =( And more to come! hahahha

I think he's trying to get this msg to me. 'So if you still go i'll understand. And If you'll stay i'll hold your hand. Well If your gone im all alone, so im hoping that you will come back home. Dont care how long but im willing to wait.' T.T You know I have to leave in the end. Im sorry I hate to but I have to.

My eyes wet the whole day today. Gawd. I didnt know that would happen. Ron finally did appear. Before he appear a guy already took my heart from u. But I still love u tho. U know that. But Nike gave me peace and sweetness whenever im with him. Im really happy with him. And I feel sad for him. I dunno y. Yes nike I love ur song ^-^ After Ron , u appear i started to get confuse. No Nike its not your fault. I cant bare to leave either of you. After you appear I know I gotta choose. Nike u made me cried the whole day. Because when im with Ron I know your alone at your fav spot. Thats the spot you took my heart. <3>.> And wtf Madison square =.= Nike I dont like ur bullshit too. I just hope to keep the feeling. Today i felt the worst pain of Kaz3ro ever. >=( Is to leave your loved ones.

Dont criticise what you do not know and did not experience before. Nigga dont trip at my page. Dont think RO dating is lame stupid and childish. Its not, its the best feeling you can ever get. <3 People are serious there too. You play online games with a community with all addicted ones before? I dont think so. They treat it as their life their world. Everything that happens to them in the game, they mind. Its not like w/e. We dont. We respect. We are serious with everything here. Its crying and laughing at the same time =3 Memories kept <3 <3 <3 So damn yo stfu get outta my page.

Aww damn keith went to indonesia back in 2 months T.T Hmm where's my auger? O_O nvm I never really wanted from him anyways =D Today I was reminising those times. The good old days of us. And from how I got up there. It really made me cry. Kaz3ro had made it possible for me to have all the sweetest and the best memories ever. Even tho there are sad and unhappy times. But thank you all! I really love you guys! <3 And yea fuck the reality im staying in holy ^-^

Um... Me and Ron had married in Serenity. xD And we were havinf fun after the marriage. Lmao /gg. But bleh.
Holy is not up yet. Im getting bored in Serenity. xD

ZOMG! I didnt blog for soooo long. Lots of thing happen since. More donators appeared in pvp owning me. -.- I hate it. Well.. im gonna donate as soon as I found my job. Cheque or cash? Hmm.. Posting my question in the forum. I WANT A PHOTSHOP software. I wanna make my signature for the forum. >.<>=( But now everything is so fine. :D Hah and now I know why aesir is so strong now. He fucking scam chidori. __ Fack! Zomg and after the upgrade = cap1500. wtf?! No lags I hope. Nico and Private tame a doppel for a pet! >.> I want that! Someone even offer 3crds for her pet. Nico gave me and ron an alice for a pet. :D And everyone was like how to tame an alice>.> HOCUS POCUS! -.- AND I FINALLY GOT A CHII!!! Yea I finally make it for myself. And today i was at serenity. And I had no friends there cause I dont play there often. Since holy is closed I was hoping I could see my friends there. Then the first person I saw was sid. I see the nick Gondes. Ok its confirm him I shouted sid! xD He was like how do you know. I said Duh Gondes is your second nick -.- Then another person appeared. ITACHI! xDD Guess whats his nick?!?! His nick----> SOMEONE STOLE MY NAME<----- -.- -.- -.- -_-''''' swtttttttttttttt He was full of craps. Then BOSS appeared! He was sitting in alde. And I saw him reforming out guild. xDD I was like hey steve its ahem. Then he invited all members from holy that was playing in serenity for the time being XDD JONSHE WAS THERE TOO!! I appreciated him =D And I will not ever forget him and will helped him whenever he needs help =D Tough time lvling in serenity. Exp was whack there. Sucks like hell. I was on a maaajor anolians and turtle killing! Zomg and the lvl was still like.... And I NEVER done a 100 breaker on noob in my whooole life. I done one this time. Damn. Rofl. And those two punk one was lvl1 the other was lvl14 when to pvp! -.- I was like o...k If u want. Then i tag along when i went in alllll were dead. LMAO -.- I come out saying that was kinda lame. -.- Rofl! That was fucking funny! So now i will be doing some crazy lvling to help at least a little for steve. He said he wanted an alde castle. For lvling I guess. I hope many people will be on for woe. And yingting is staying at my hse. She will be going home tommora. End here now. Byees lates.

Nth's sup today. Except learnt a new language. Tagalog. Lol. YourDesire teached me. :D Salamat desire xD. Yea chatted for the whole day. Improve my breaker a lil. Or deprove? Not sho. Experimenting my breaker alot. Yea... and it needed loads of money. Dont know how to earn them faster. Viruz!! Stop killing me. Wakoko! Lmao. Looking for wild ghost now. But too lazy for that. Lol.

Server History ]] Kaz3ro

Starting out with as a small guild in aeRO, the players slowly got to know each other, helping each other out, and fighting for territories for the WoE. "Kamikaz3", as it was known, grew into a large community. After the change of ownership of aeRO, people started leaving. Due to the decline in players because of the new ownership, the leaders of Kaz3RO started discuss it with the other guild members about future arrangements. From there, the decision was a new server, "Kaz3RO". Made by a small population, this has contributed significantly on the making the server possible. Kaz3RO is made to be fun, exhilarating and eventful for everyone. All members in the Kaz3RO Staff are helpful and friendly, and try to help in any way possible. From a small guild, to a new server with a team that is willing to help, we welcome you to join Kaz3RO, "where dreams await". [Help support us, click on the links below to help vote for Kaz3RO]

U know what? I guess I dont care about the real world anymore. I dont any thing from the real world anymore. I just need to indulge in the world of kaz3ro and I'll forget every misery in reality. I dont wish to live in reality. I wish that Kaz3ro was real. I could be in there.
met some wonderful ppl there. Heh. Wish to play ro my whole life.

=((( I know he wont call... Lets hope for next fri... Haiz... Those words he use to say to me, are those the truth? ...

Today I realised how much I missed my laopo. Its only been three or two days didnt see her because she have to work. I missed her already. O damn. I have to look for a job man. This is getting much worse. Then that alvin keep camping at ma hse. Think what my hse is a hotel ar want come jiu come. My hse not like Darren hse wor. Haiz. I wonder tml yuren will call me not. I missed him so much i doubt he did not know. I didnt even want to reply my msg. One reply is so important for me. Haiz. Then now my laopo everyday go happy le. Then I at home alone and bored. Envious of her..

Haiz.. Dont think we can go to hp ever again... Our reputation had been even worse than before. It had already been bad. Now? Even worse. Damn. Cant find a place to play billard again. I dont want my skill to deprove.. God damnit. Hope those girls will have their retribution. Damn why they did not hit me. Not thrilling enuff man.

Now my laopo had a new job and i havent even found one. Maybe im too fat and short thats y. She work full time.. Now nobody go out with me le. Feeling bore and sick of my life.

Just came back from ktv pub. Drank one tequila pop and a jug of vodka ribena and many glasses of bourbon coke. Bourbon coke free de. Cause we acc the guy then he treat us. He bought martell and coke as mixer mahz... Drink till song. But dont know y still dont feel drunk cia.

Then just now at ktv pub send Yuren a msg. I still misses him a lot man, after this few weeks he in camp I still misses him so much. Ytd a phone call lights my day and a lighter spoil my day. Damn. I hope Hear some good news from Yuren cia... Praying.. Haiz...

-I miss hp.. Cant bare to leave that place.
-I misses billard already.
-I misses Yuren even more.

Haiz.. Dont think we can go to hp ever again... Our reputation had been even worse than before. It had already been bad. Now? Even worse. Damn. Cant find a place to play billard again. I dont want my skill to deprove.. God damnit. Hope those girls will have their revenge. Damn why they did not hit me. Not thrilling enuff man.

Now my laopo had a new job and i havent even found one. Maybe im too fat and short thats y. She work full time.. Now nobody go out with me le. Feeling bore and sick of my life.

Just came back from ktv pub. Drank one tequila pop and a jug of vodka ribena and many glasses of bourbon coke. Bourbon coke free de. Cause we acc the guy then he treat us. He bought martell and coke as mixer mahz... Drink till song. But dont know y still dont feel drunk cia.

Then just now at ktv pub send Yuren a msg. I still misses him a lot man, after this few weeks he in camp I still misses him so much. Ytd a phone call lights my day and a lighter spoil my day. Damn. I hope Hear some good news from Yuren cia... Praying.. Haiz...

-I miss hp.. Cant bare to leave that place.
-I misses billard already.
-I misses Yuren even more.

Hurting and comforting words... They come. But in the end what words left will be nth. Action had to be seen. But there are no actions. No results. No conclusion. No decision. I will be there just geting hurt by words, lighting up a lil by words. Nth done to make it clear to me. Only rumours, thoughts, assumption and words from friends.

I cant do anything. Yea pray. Hoping. Nth else. All has to be done by him.
*crys

Friends blog webbie changing to www.red-deceit.blogspot.com in a weeks time.
Pls tag when u saw this msg cos i dont wanna spend time tagging on all ppl's blog. Thanks.
For saving my trouble.

He's going back in. Anyway saw them at friday at seven eleven. But we walked past and didnt bother to stop after seeing what they did when they saw us. I nearly cried. But i didnt but was boiling with anger. So we went to alvin hse to play mahjong. Played for a little while. Pat called and ask us to go down find them. What for ask us to find them when two of them saw us and faster walked away. I didnt expect much from him i just wanted to see him. I dont understand why. Then after that I went down happily. And went back crying. Damn. I cant believe what he said. I dont know what happen between xy and sam. I dont know what happen between you guy's gossip. But IM NOT INCLUDED AIGHT! Im not associated with that incident. Dont judge me from my best friend. Its like as if what she does they judge me from it. Shes like that and im not. I just cant believe it. They say i dont mind. But i heard it from ur mouth. Then I was like pissed off already and I cant stand being there. Then I told them we are going back to our friend's hse already. Then Pat said his last fucking words and I was like 'Dont say me until like that im not like that!' And walked away tolerating. Then immediately broke down and cried. But i didnt really cried cos my shoulders are shaking but i manage not to drop any tears. But when i reach the hse. I immediately walked to the mahjong table and shuffle the tiles. Thats not like me cos i was always the lazy one. I didnt even greet alvin when i reach the hse. Then xy started something abt them. I replyed. Saying all the unhappiness i have abt them. I just keep saying and finally broke down. This time i really cried. I was trying to control my tears when i talked but it just keep flowing. After that i was like nvm nvm its over. And vent my frustration on the tiles. But that day very ke yan. I was like laughing all the way from hougang to serangoon. Then that night we played mahjong then outside one girl very guai lan. Then she from the living rm scolded us. Then we from the kitchen shouted back then it was like shout there shout here. Lol but didnt manage to see that girl. In the morning Pat called us to go down. Said Sam wanted to talk to xy. Then in then end Sam didnt said anything. Haiz nvm. I was there blood boiling all the way. Then I heard sam said yuren kin lei. Then he say you ask her come down then never say anything. Then I was like cool down a lil and happy a lil. Lol. But I felt that Sam is just jking or what. Then after that we went to Pat hse drink play taidee. Then very sian Yu Ren slping all the way. Then go home that time he just walked away. I wanted to say goodbye. But he walked too fast. Haiz. Nvm. I felt that all this is over.

Dont think So... =) All the Best

Yay he tml come out le. Aslo dont know if I got the chance to see him anot. Sam and Patrick never contact us anymore. I also dont know what the fuck happen. Thats y I dont like to know ppl outside. A while lost contact le. Like what cia. I hope got the chance to see him.

Just came back from hougang. My dad go fetch me. Lol sat sat cia. But dunno why ppl keep disiao xy and me lor dont like wor. Haiz friday also dunno whether want to not liaoz. Pat they all la. What the fuck. Dont understand them lor. Everytime attitude. Then Xy dont like him only then dont want contact liaoz. Then Sam and xy how. Then that Sam also lj kia de leh. If like Xy then jio her la. Do until like that liaoz then want how. Because of Pat meh? Kns lor. If he your bro then he should not because he like then dont let u have her mahz. I just feel that Sam is because of Pat but dunno izit that reason or he just wanna play Xy's feeling. Damn. Hate guys. Thats y i always dont like paikia. I wanna find one serious want also difficult. Then he lei. I also dunno la. Like play play only. Kns. Guys sux.

Three more days.. Miss you.

Stuck at home with no ciggie.

Tml going out with kwang. He want smoke wor. I no need buy ciggie. =) I deserve to smile. Lol.

Friday go mos. Hope got liquor. Hope after that go hotel with them especially him. ;)

Knn give him dua again. Actually at home wear till nice nice then in the end change clothes again. Then ton three days le now come home blog. Sian. Also dunno what to say.

Today Ah zai say wanna bring us go pub again. Hope he dont dua kang again. Cause must talk about that job the thingie. Later eating swensens with ma sis. Then after taht xy coming over cause she want go woodlands take things. Ytd she gotta conflicts with patrick they all then in the end talk cok want. Like nth happen like that. Then i also diam diam never say him cause if not really then i cant go out with them and see him le. One by one all attitude. Cant stand it.

I cant believe i can wait patiently here without any second thoughts and fustration. I still remember my ex, everyday waiting for him to msg me seem more difficult. Maybe because i already know that he wont patch with me. So it seem more difficult to wait and missing him everyday knowing i wont get a chance to ever see him. Damn. Why am I thinking of him. Nahz nahz no more kwang. He's history. I just wanna get back ma linkinpark cds!!! Damnit! Seven more days and he's out! Then I could possibly see him? Maybe...

Yay he friday come out sunday then go back in! Then next friday go mos. But i dont think i want to go. Cause no money. And i want to forget him?? But i dont want too.. Haiz dont know? see first.

I've seen him for the last time. Didnt have anything better to say to him. Cause I am afraid. I am afraid to show. Afraid of rejection. Afraid of loving someone. Now I have to wait.

Im already missing. Waiting patiently. What for gal? For a happy ending? Fuck you dream on. There no happy ending just look at you. They are just entertaining a fucking you. Nvm just wait its only months.

Im down with words

Now I know. You are just entertaining a fucking me.

Bye.. Saw your friendster... nth to say. Im the one sticking out. Im sorry but I cant go on. Bye.

Lol. After ytd that msg he didnt called me already. Phew. But im sorry.

Fuck that server so lag. I wonder how they guys lvl up so fast with that laggy server. I thought the server had capped players at 500. It was way off better. Damn. Its off.

Lol. Watch hide and seek alone at home in the dark really creeps me out.. The sound effect was good. Damn it scare me a million times. And i pause a while give myself a rest later then continue. Lol. Nice way to pass my time.

I still miss you.
I still want you back.
Do you remember me?

I given everything
I love you endlessly
But when it comes to me
You dont even notice me

Blah blah blah blah blah
I cannot slp le ar!

Lol... Stupid i dont understand why ppl choose to call at odds hrs of those times...
Damn i keep trying to slp but keep waking up by the song of Collide... My ring tone...
I already have difficulties in slping they still keep waking me up...
Damn it...

I want to smoke! No ciggie

He's so irritating! I feel that im beginning to dislike him now. What he says I dont even understand. And plus he keeps calling me. And talk those 'un'understandable talks, oh pls im using hi card damnit. Plus we cant even communicate well I guess this have to end.

Hahz. Best damn site in singapore. It was sure hella funny. Here's an entry.


Want to piss me off? Just go "LOL"

If you are the few lucky people who don't know wat "lol" means, i envy you. "lol", for the blissfully ignorant, is an acronym for "laughing out loud" and its been overused too much by every single geek who has ever chatted online. Now there's nothing wrong with using lol if something really made you laugh out loud. Problem is, no one actually laughs loudly or even laugh at all at something they replied lol to. Don't know what i mean? Here's a sample conversation between 2 chatters:
1: i saw "spiderman 2" yest, it was so LOL!
2: LOLx! (don't ask me what the x or z means)
1: seriously i lol thruout the movie
2: LOLz!
1: lol(continues on and on with their lol orgy)

There's no meaning behind this acronym anymore cause it seems to be an automated response to anything remotely humorous. The only thing worse than reading someone lol their way through a conversation, and most likely cause they're so boring they have nothing else to say anyway is to meet someone who uses lol in his speech like that moron in my class who says "L-O-L!" whenever he hears something funny. If you're trying to be different come to school wearing a straw hat with a ribbon or your shirt inside out or something, otherwise you're just pissing the shit out of everyone you LOL'ed at. It's not funny, it's not witty, just let it go.

If you're still gonna be a hyporcrite and pretend to lol or rofl or lmao even when you're not actually laughing, why not take it one step further? Use this other kickass acronyms to show everyone how fucking loud you're laughing and how different you are. If you want to be cool and mysterious don't bother explaining what any of it means, just go "LOL you dun even know wat ROFLTMRCI means!" and theyll all be going "you're so cool LOL!"

I need anger management. One day i will kill myself. I might kill them all. Kill us all. Kill you! Still feel like squeezing things. Feel like crashing thing. Feel like breaking things.

I HATE MUM!I HATE MUM!I HATE MUM!I HATE MUM!I HATE MUM!I HATE MUM!
I want go jb! Fucker HER! The last time i shouldnt give you back MY passport! Fuck YOU!

Honestly speaking, I MISS YOU STEVEN!! heeh

Ytd went to wait for xy because she just found a job at a restaurant. And that fucking restuarant cost me $4 for two cup of juice. Im already so broke. Then waited for sometime then too bored. Called ming kar then after that go play billard. Haha he lose me pool and billard. But then after that when i go meet ma baby with xy at hougang my billard totally sucks. I dont understand. I really really dont believe it. I dont believe i only hit two balls in. It totally sucks. After that we went to a ktv pub at east coast, drink two glass of beer then went off. What a waste of time two glass?! After that xy went home i went to find ma baby. Just reach home now. But later xy say maybe got chivas drink. But i dunno want to go not. Tml go jb de pub. Not sure i can manage to get or find my passport not. Fuck them.

I guess I dont really understand you. Tell me something... Just tell me anything abt you. I really wanna know. We dont even talk on the phone. Guess we really cant communicate at all. I hope i had a way. I hope this will grow.. Cant possibly stay this way. And plus i dont know what I really wants. And im confused.

These few days i have been confusing myself with things that maybe isnt reasonable or with some lame stupid stuffs.. Been feeling depressed lately..

Sleepless nights continued. I dont know why i cant sleep at night. And some time in the day when i really tried sleeping. I cant. I feel so so tired but everytime i lie down images and thoughts keep squeezing into my brain and its so vivid, it never gets blurry. Dont say i never try hard enough. i lie there for hrs and hrs its just wasting my time. Even though if im really tired I still cant fall asleep. And i really really wants to sleep. So thats y everytime i got a chance to feel sleepy i immediately take these chance to sleep well. And i will put everything aside just to get some rest. I even cancel my appearance for the hang out of the day just to slp. Some will understand. And things has started to get so bad that i starting to vent my anger on friends. I sorry xy if these few weeks i've been really irritating or boiling. I know you could understand. You havent shouted or screaming at me. Thanks fer ya patience. Thats really the person i should thank.

Money is slipping out like fine sand get blown away by the wind and I will never get it back. Or will i? k stop crapping. Jobs? Suckers. What kind of fuck do they really want? Diploma to work in a restaurant as a waitress? Stfu! I dont understand it. Why dont you just call? So many i actually cant believe none of them called.

Ima bitch! I dont really understand what i want. Whats wrong with me?! Ever since kwang broke up with me. Im starting to act like a slut. Do what sluts do. I really really hate myself but i dont understand why i did things like that. Im a fugly fucking fucker+sucker. Xy pls i need you to help me. Only you i can seek advice for. Only you knows what happened all the way. And I really meant all that way. Im a stupid bitch!

Friends? If there are many looking for a perfect one. Im sorry theres no human like that exist at all. Maybe to the planet Z. Look if you want. Im sorry but you've got to have the unlimited patience to withstand their bad points. And i 've empathsize these many times but seems like no one really understand or is that they understand but nth is done but gossiping. I know, I have done some gossiping too but these only the one and only one i gossiped about. Ask yt she knows. Lol. Look. My tolerance level is high thats y i can stay with xy for a long long time. And now we became really close. Take a stand.

I can say this is the first time i sleep during these three days... Lol that chalet was quite boring but it was worth it.. Got to know some ppls.. lol and got a free hi-card.. Heeh! happy.. Then before that i bought jim beam then we all drank at paradiz.. And i can say drink the most there... As i drink it nik and can say is more than anyone... Then after that sit that fucking bus so rocking then head abit dizzy then vomit... Then reach there le go see ah gua lol. then taxi uncle bring us go see ah gua.. hahahz. so funny that uncle... The most funniest part is the part we reach le then gostan.. Friends want to know ask me.. lol. Then meet yixiong outside then i and him finish the jim bean half half... xy dun dare drink.. Then we went in drink again.. lol sian cia whole day was like drinking then i have an empty stomach and that was a 43% exciting volka it says lol.. then drink till dawn sun rise already then go vomit again.. But nth to vomit all come out water... Then after that my stomach very very pain cia.. and hungry. After that at night le sit cab home lor sian waste money...

This few weeks.. Thoughts are flashing pass fast. And the day that i went out with Alphy, he really enlighten me and open up my mind. We can only be young once. And enjoy our sch life once. Once its over we have to work hard. But what about me? Thinking of slogging for life? No way. I really wanna go back sch and study hard. But what really stopped me is the loneliness in sch... And what if i wasted anotehr yr again and all sorts of possiblility. But i really wants to study. But theres no determination at all..

Ha.Ha. Ppl can change their mind want lor not so straight lor.. Anyway is you keep forcing then i say yes want lor... If you dont want me like that, then dont force me anymore. When i say i dont want means i dont want lor

I dont understand why. I really just dont understand why. I dont understand why ppl like to 'force' me do things that i dont want to do. After 'forcing' one thing they 'force' me to do anything again. And their 'force' is so call persuading me only. Then after persuading im still the same no motion they started to get angry. What for? Whats the use?

Wah.. Just came home then need to go out again haven slp for the whole day... ytd he bring me out meet me at ard 3am plus.. then go eat supper.. Nice! Eat that thing call gong bao tian ji... With porriage damn nice! Getting spicier every min...Then after that go play pool n billard.. Shit ass no form lor.. Totally... I i sian diao.. My skills like deproving... Deprive of practices... Then after that go where ar? .. Lol i forget... oh ya Mount fable.. Quite nice la... Then sit there talk cok very funny he's jokes... Lol.. Then go eat breakfast.. Nice! the you tiao at Geylang Lor 18.. Then the shao bin and taiwan mian xian.. Damn nice.. Then after that go hotel play poppers.. Another name call rush ar he say.. Quite shoik la... But the kick last for mins only.. So short...Then i keep sniffing lor... lol then he go slp i watch tv... Watch two show very NICE man.. got hbo want cia... Then i try to slp cant slp cia! Out side so fucking noisy lor.. Construction worker outside drill drill drill... Then come back home got ppl drilling upstairs wtf... Then whole day havent slp so fucking tired... Waiting for my friend's call just afraid that i would fall asleep...

Fucking angry with xy... I have already told her first hand.. Once i started slping it would be difficult to be up again.. Then in the end i wake up at 9pm then she dont want to go out already... Wtf she everyday just acc her guys can already.. Two guys would keep her fucking busy... If shes still free then go find more, more guys would be happy to have her companion..

Lol... sian.. wah lan eh... walk ard hougang then three bikers there following us then in the end get xy no... then go plaza with us... before tht i n xy go burn newspaper in the rubbish bin lol then the whole thing melt.. lol.. so fun then got ppl saw us then we run cia so thrilling so fun... lol.. then we walk walk walk then saw rubbish bin again then move the bin in the middle of of the road lol funny seh then the ppl come out of the car and put the bin back lol... stupid seh.. then those three reach plaza le then they go in and one of them have not reach the age limit but they smuggle them in then in the end kana ban... Then they downstair si bei dulan then throw the chair all that then ka zhua saw mahz also du lan then ka zhua say kua lan jiao then in the end like wan tio dai ji like that in the end shake hands settle le cos the ah yi c0me and stop them mahz.. say what u all now also nv chup liaoz still want fight then after that settle le... so lame lor... Luckily i think they dunno they know us ar... If not cia sway next time how to go plaza...'
wtf.. sway cia know them... They take xy no. that time i already sian diao liaoz... Then heard they want go plaza with us i more sian lor

... I still miss him.. I still love him... Pls want me back... Im sry yong yuan i know its not fair to you... because my heart still have my ex.. Im sry...

Anyway.. Feel like breaking him le... Got stead feels like none.. Wtf. Does he treat me like his stead.

Just woke up... Wondering why xy never call me.. I thought she told me to wake up at 4pm tehn after that meet her father why she didnt call? Ncm anyway.. ytd go clark quey.. It was whack.. But luckily we got a taxi driver to drive us around lol.. FREE. lol in the worning drive go eat drink smoke and talk cok. lol Now that was fun.. I haven laugh out in a while.. Hhahah anyways hope can like this again lol

Hearing those songs... His back again... His shadown is back in my mind.. Sobs... SAve me!

Wondering... Was it a trail of unwise decision? Or a blessing in disguise?

Wrong wrong wrong! Everything is going wrong! Save me!

Lol.. He so cute lor.. This few days keep talking to him on phone.. yep.. Then feel that he very cute lei... Dunno lei then i just scare that he would be disappointed to see me looking like this... Maybe he thought that i will look pretty then he jio me want... Then dunno la.. whether to accept anot... Then we can get along quite well.. I dunno if he is sincere anot but he sounds not really sincere lei... Like just finding a stead to acc only... soo..... Dunno lahs...

Hm.. Today went to ps actually plan to go look for a job but we wear kinda too improperiate to go for an interview so we plan to go on monday... Then go there to repair my fucking shoes which i bought for just one fucking week and its fucking spoilt... And im fucking hot... Then after that went to look fer daniel.. After that I saw a two niggaz and they say hi i say hi back then they come over.. We chatted and he asked for number.. And guess what? They are from america!! o.m.g... Lol Very nice to chat.. Seem like a million things to talk about... Then they acc us walk to bugis and then we went seperate ways. then we went to find mingkar gabriel and his friends.. After that we went to his friend's hse before that i think they eat pills.. Then kinda weird... A while after we went off sit at bus stop chatted for a very long time... She say she dare not say cause scare i angry then don care her but i told nah just say out everything no need scare want.. Next time anything just say out... Then we chatted very very very long and after taht chat we felt even more closer.. And after then sit cab go home.. The taxi uncle also very good to chat lol.. Talk cok with him all that lol

Wtf Fuck you.. The moment i just thought of you u appear just at ma face.. And what is that fucking expression?! Don wanna see me again izit?! Wtf is that busy stuff? Busy going out playing pool or hanging around with yer girls.. Fucking ji hong. Ooooh soo cuuute with that fucking sunglasses on is it.. So cool so cute. Ugh! Pui! Yer taste fucking sucks! Eew! Pp EE U! So fucking short i guess even shorter than me.. So I guess you like toot toot innocent girls Y?! For you to fuck izit for yer to cheat again fucking right? Fucking geeks. Wtf Do you think you are mr Charm.. Charm any girls you want.. I sincerely spit on you... You ruin ma day.

What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU. What the fuck?! FUCK YOU.

-ji hong kia!!
-ji hong kia!!
-ji hong kia!!

-decided to slowly take my time to it...
-sort things out clearly before i make move
-and not to make those same fucking mistakes again
-try to change ma self first though

.. Haiz.. I really dunno what to say.. Feel like calling him but i cant find the courage to call him... Its like very thick skin and im also not very chio then like very bo bian and dun want face like that... Thats what i felt.. It really saddened me that y do i look this way... Then today he rejected me.. Like so paiseh lor... Not really a big deal cause it just an offer to go out lol.. Im just waiting for him to ask me that fucking qn that wont get out of his mouth... haiz... how long do i have to wait... But i do really hope if i got a chance i hope it last long.. Cause im kinda sick and tired of short relationship... Im afraid if i called then there would be some mins of sinlence cause it would be awkward if there were nth to talk about.. Im in a dileima now! Should i call or not?

-sry i hate it when theres much spelling mistake in my entry...
-lol kwang called me in the afternnoon
-Should i call him?
-Still thinking about the taxi thingy
-Nice one heeh

Hai... Fucking family... Friends my sim card kana confiscated soo... Don msg nor call... Call me directly to ma house or xueying to find me... thz...

-Bad gastric
-Nv eaten most of the times
-I need a fucking job!

lol. Nice one Tsk... You are so wasted. After going to Indonchine, vomit in the cab... taxi uncle was 38 hot.. I was like sorry... lol. Reaching hougang plaza alone.. went up to the toilet and fucking vomited again... Lie down in the toilet kiao ka and slp lol... For half an hr... ppl keep calling dunno wtf they wants.. When to meet ah long then slp all the way until andy bring me to stairway then we talk all the way... then after that dunno go where then i go home...

-In cab.. darren what r u tryna do?
-Anyways.. nice one
-Slow and soft... :P hahz

Bored to tears... Wonder later going boat quey or not... Free liquor again yea.. that rox..

-Will he be mine?
-Im too ugly fer him?
-em bore with me?

... don like this template.. its just not me.. not my style... no time change..

Why did he do that? Why did he call me up for a chat with me when he has been ignoring me for the past months... Or is he just wants to have that sleipnir... Wants me to teach him how to make that and mixture??? Then i ask him to teach me make that arch angel wings he told me he forget... like wtf? Its like keeping all the good stuff to himself without want to share... All i did was give and he all he did? Take... After that we chatted for a while and he just suddenly said everytime he lie on his bed he will think of me and that... I was like the 'huh' expression... And it sucks... And he ask me did i missed him all that.. And said he'd missed me.. I immediately felt that he was just using me as a spare tyre and trying to make me fall deeper for him.. Then suddenly say all this, the next day wont even have a msg sending to my hp.. Fucked up by it. And wasnt going to care about that and that phone call was just entertaining a fucking me...

I bet shes going back.. This is totally whack.. How should it goes.. My regrets..


Why did he do that? What does he wants??

What is he trying to prove to me??... fuck it...

I want to say thank you Alphy for this few days... lol.. He will be leaving in less than two months time to uk... aww so sad... dont want you leaving so fast wor... If not no one bring me out le.. lol...

Let me introduce you to my thinking process.
Murders happen all the time, right? Well, what's so fucking bad about it? The person doing the murdering is doing a huge favor by killing, as this life is a waste of time, and is pointless, as everyone I hope, knows. But, if the murderer is put into a jail cell for the rest of his life, that won't do much. One, it takes up space, and two, this will make the murder more pissed. So, if they were given a death penalty, like a beheading, it would be better, and also, it would reward them, for they will get removed from this life too. It's like doing people a favor, killing. See what I'm saying?
And hanging heads and dead bodies around places would warn those who are afraid to die, so they woudn't do a crime, like stealing for example.
Also, what's so good about this 'god'? It's just not in a person's true nature to go through life like a Barney episode. It just makes more sense the other way around. It's just way too hard for me to explain on how I feel about this. It really is. Jesus was probably indeed an actual person who SEEMED to do great deeds and had messangers at his side. Angels are what 'messenger' means in a certain language; I forgot which. And people probably later looked at this Jesus as a 'god' and worshipped him. And he died and one of his messengers, Lucifer, betrayed him, for reasons I can completely agree with, and so god just bannished him to a place actually better than heaven.
If people keep being all happy and continue breeding, this world will evantually be a huge trash pit. Full of houses, roads, pollution. And if this 'god' didn't want his world to suffer, he wouldn't let it, would he? He is a fraud. And if indeed he did 'create', then people are the worst possible mistake you ever could make. Did he create people to become his allies against Lucifer? IS HE THAT WEAK? IF HE IS GOD THE ALMIGHTY, WHERE THE FUCK IS THIS 'MIGHT'? WOULDN'T LUCIFER BE DESTROYED BY NOW?
As I said before, this is all very hard for me to explain how I feel. But let me just sum it up: Do we want to live in a world so bright it blinds us?

... Today i sms him hows ya.. he told me let like lor.. now a days got group togethre with a lot of ppl then in the group got one girl closer with me... I was like.. damn it..

No im free... I cant be trapped inside his palm anymore... Damnit... Who the fuck do you think u are

The job is so fun. Lol answering phone and just pressing com. lol But some things are quite complicated... So fucking complicated and no confident in doing things...

Most ppl always think that scooter is lok cok and and sucks. I think so too. But now i've tried and its not so bad... Very comfortable and good to sit... Can move about too. Lol. And its damn cold at night just wearing a tube and riding a scooter. Omg i was shivering man.. So cold... But song lol

Yippe!~ Chivas! Here I come!! Yay today xy father come back from overseas then she called him to buy Chivas come back then he's coming back today! Yea i love hard liquor! Bye bye reality! Come back ma world!

I finally a job... Can get on with my life but kinda little pay with tough working days... but... nvm at least i wont think too much...

Hai today i look at a fucking chain mail and cried.... Xuan qing do you know how i miss you...
I miss you so badly, dearly... I MISS YOU!!!

I got soo wasted last morning.. I even vomited on the bus with no one here talking care of me... I remember the last time i got wasted he took care of me greatly... I will not forget it... His strong arms and his gentle care... But in the bus it felt so cold so lonely so pathetic so weak...

Your not here when i needed you
But its time to face the truth
I will never be with you
You just dont get a clue
Why do i feel so blue
I finally see you through
Your not as good...

Or do i really see you through?
No I dont...

Why cant i just forget you??

WAR OF THE WORLD!!!
Overall a nice show...

The best was the sound effect and the suspension... But what really makes the show bad was the ending. I was really bored off by the ending. Its like too simple and 'too dramatic simple' was like a children ending with a good explanation... But i really really like the suspense in the movie. I could really feel the fear and their acting was superb. They really act out the fear and make it look real. The sound effects were thrilling. I was so engrossed in the movie. I watched every sec and min of it without fail. I even ignored my sis qns. The graphic was ok. Some part of it was funny too. But i really must stress on the suspension. It was really really god damn fanastic. I dont know how should i stress on the word fanastic and i dont know how should i describe it. But i know it was the best suspension movie i've seen. So check it out will ya?

Another day is going by

I'm thinking about you all the time

But you're out there

And I'm here waiting

******************

And I wrote this letter in my head

Cuz so many things were left unsaid

but now you're gone

And I can't think straight

**********************

This could be the one last chance

To make you understand

**********************

I'd do anything

Just to hold you in my arms

To try to make you laugh

Somehow I can't put you in the past

I'd do anything

Just to fall asleep with you

Will you remember me?

Cuz I know I won't forget you

**************************

Together we broke all the rules

Dreaming of droping out of school

And leave this place to never come back

***********************************

So now maybe after all these years

If you miss me have no fear

I'll be here I'll be waiting

**********************

This could be the one last chance to make you understand

And I just can't let you leave me once again

**************************************

I close my eyes

And all I see is you

I close my eyes

I try to sleep

I can't forget you

And I'd do anything for you

Who the fuck do you think you ar?! OmFg! Just look at yourself do yer think ur any man that can charm any girls. Dont be too confident punk. So what do you think ur doing avoiding me here. You suck your words suck even more. I will not take any more of your sweet little lies. I finally see yer through. No way am i gonna fall into ur trap again. Ur just wearing a perfect mask.

Perfect by nature
Icons of self indulgence
Just what we all need
More lies about a world that

Never was and never will be
Your not real and you cant save me
And somehow now your everybody's fool

Look here she comes now
Bow down and stare in wonder
Oh how we love you
No flaws like your pretending
But now i know she

Never was and never will be
Have no shame dont u see me
You know you've got everybody's fool

omg I cant control my emotions now. He really just made me look like a crying doll... I have no expression now. The blank look on my face... The sad smile i often gave... The look in his eyes that made me cry omg omg omg im really going mad.

Its over! ITs over! Its over! Its over! Its over! Its over! Its over! Its over! Its over.... .... GOD DAMN IT! WHY CANT YOU JUST ACCPET DA FACT THAT ITS OVER!!!!!

Nth will ever be the same again. Not if we are friends.
Because no.
I cant turn to you knowing that you will cheer me up again because no you left me that very day i cried.
I cant live in your love and concern anymore because no you dont love me anymore.
I cant hug your arms no more because no you left me here all alone knowing that i needed you.
I cant look at your brown eyes any closer now because no you have to go the moment i was missing you so badly.
I cant often see your msg on the phone now because no I dont even exists in your heart now.
I cant see you that often now because no you are beginning to feel irritated about me.
I cant be your lady now... because no... you left me that very day... ...

Every single day i live with a new hope that you would just msg me automatically just to let me know that you'd miss me or that a miracla would happen or i can see you today. Just a simple wish from you but every end of the day my hope gets broken. I hate the feeling of disappointment repeating just over and over again. Its like living on the day you broke up with me. I cant stand this kind of hurt and sorrow. God please return to me the miracle salvation. I still believe in you... I still believe you would change your mind and come back to me. I still beliee we can make it through this. Im still waiting for that very day. Please dont disappoint me again. Dont hurt me again. Can I see you now?

We broke up... It just happen so abruptly.... Still in the state of shock and confusion. To a point of self-loathing and self-blaming... I will quit sch this time.

Never believe in love no more.
I wait. You will never call.
I am a girl you will never adore.
Somehow everything i see is bloody gore.
I love you to the core, but you made me become a crying doll.
I hate walking alone in the mall
Im here for you to ignore.
Why do you love me in the past? What for?
Im here waiting for your care and concern to store.
Never fall in love no more.

I look at your message on the phone.
I really dont wanna let you go.
Please tell me why i seriously wanna know.
How could you let me go?
Do you still love me? Please dont say no.
Please dont say the word. I know i cant cope.
I dont wanna be there all alone.
I dont want anyone else except you in my zone.
So please dont leave me here lying cold.
You are my only one. My only hope.

So much love so much security in the past... How the fuck did things change so fast.. I dont understand i just dont understand... Pls tell me the truth..

I try to kill the pain but only brought more...

Thank you for completing me
Thank you for making me see
Thank you for accepting me as who i am
Thank you for making my lonliness end
Thank you for holding my hand when im fallin
Thank you for being there when im calling
Thank you for making my everything
Thank you for loving my everything
Thank you for not complaining
Thank you for not blaming it

Ever since the day you went away and left me lonely and cold

My life just hasn't been the same ohh baby, nooo

When I looked into your eyes the moment that I let you go I just broke down

Baby if I ever get the chance to be with you again I would sacrifice

Cuz the feeling that I feel within

No other man would ever make me feel so right

Its nice to smile when I get your phone call at night

But I'd rather have you here with me, right next to me

I miss the way you hold me tight

I gotta let you know I feel so weak without your touch

I never thought that I could ever love a man so much

I gotta let you know I think that we are destiny

For you I'd cross the world, for you I'd do anything

Thats right baby I'm going crazy

I need to be your ladyI've been thinking lately

That you and me, yes we can make it

Just ride with me, roll with me I'm in love with you baby

Break it down now I'll tell you what I feel

From the moment that I met you its been so damn real

My heart seems to skip another beat

Every time we speak, I can't believe I feel so weak

Tell me that you really need me and you want me and you miss me

And you love me I'm your lady

I'll be around waiting for you

I'll put it down be the woman for you

I'm falling so deep for you crazy over for you

I`m calling, calling out to you what am I going to do?

It's true, no fronting

Its you and no other i can no longer go on without you I'll just break down

If you want to kick me one side then why did you jio me in the first place... i hate you for that... think what ai mai ai mai ar. im not a HoR go to geylang if you want some.. I cant believe you actually said that to me... My eyes just sting... I hate you... I love you

I knew it from the start. U still cant let go of the past relationship. I know u would love her more than u do love me. This few days u kept talking about ur ex. Like what would she do in this that situation. At where when. It hurts me so bad even though i always put up a tough front and makes u think that i do not care. If ever u had a chance i bet u would rather go back to her. I know u still miss remember the time i asked you. Do you ever missed her. U told me you do still. Im so afraid you would go back to her. I cant stand you having another lady occupied another space of your heart. I felt incomparison to her. I felt so small, afraid, tiny and weak. Shes just too great... Shes just too perfect... Shes seem the only one just perfect for you. Even thought ur right beside im know u dont only see me in your eyes. How you wish im her. Im sorry im not her. I cant be her. Shes more unique than me on ur eyes. I always saw something in your eyes that you are beginning to get fustrated about me. It makes me feel afraid. Did you know i even cried? I doubt you don even ur here. Im beginning to treasure. Im beginning to feel it. The pain... I beg you dont push me away. Dont neglect me....

No comments... Just waiting. I know its coming. Is my happy ending coming? I doubt it.

finaly!!! Im back home!! Chill out for four days... Whack out of chip. But kinda lucky some how

Only today i just realise something very important in my life. I didnt know that i ever love him so much... After going to his house when we were talking he suddenly said something thatrunk me unexpectantly and it really pains me to think of his sentence. What if it really going to happen. I dont think i would take it and it didnt happen and I reacted already so what if it happen. I dont wanna think of it. I didnt expect I would reacted that way and i totally screwed up. I tried to control nut failed. Im gonna miss him.

I miss his brown eyes. His playful look. It trips me off ... I love him. Willingly. I finaly dare to admit it. I love you.

Haiz fucked up life... spoke to him on the phone... Thinking* how stress he is with his family... so sad.... Felt very guilty of treating him this way like everytime pang seh him when im with friends. Then i cried silently on the phone even though i dont feel like crying... Stress*
Quit sch mum cried. He cried. Some conflicts. Tired. Sick. Real tired. Broke. Damn. Fucked up.
FUCKED UP LIFE!!!! I HATE YOU!

Like wat the fuck. Some dyke was fucked up and so she went to fucking wrote in her fucked up webbie. And now i was like wat the fuck expression.

Yipee! lol i finally got hp. *like finally*~~ hawhaw... Still not thinking right. Still not making any choices. * bye~ shitting

wah sian.. now at lan thherer then all go blog update then i also come join in the fun nor... lol.. ytd my bday so sian not special want.. but then xq,py,yt and ly come my house give me bday cake so touch. Then that stupid xy never come acc me still saY what sistaz cia... So angry then she come liaoz already 12.15AM liaoz then already after my bday liaoz never give me face. Then i keep saying her. Then so funny. Actually i not angry want then kay kay abit mahz lol. then got one kay po help me type dunno type what then delete. then saw me type this then help me delete again so KAYPO. LOL.

Im starting to get irritated~ You better watch it and stop it or you better try to save it or lose it. But I hate heading back. Watch it.

I wont let you be our obstacle. You wont pressure me.

I love you~... Do I want to? Heeh what the hell. Hecka that.. love you willingly... Muacks!

Not really myself nowadays. I cant believe that im really falling for him? I really dont know. I can see that he is serious to this relationship but I dont know what i really wants. I now dont mind his negative side already but I dont like falling for a person! It makes me miss the person so much that I felt boring without him. I cant believe this is me. I always thought that i wouldnt care if my stead would care about me or not or would he call me or that he really love me. How i wish he wouldnt care much about me or treated me so good. It makes me so sick. Haiz... its so tiring. I want me back! Nvm I just hope im happy.

Im sooo happy! Im finally back with her again! Friends forever! I hope i dont do anything wrong again. Oh man really regreted it.

Did something i never thought i will do.

Cousellor lecture me again.

Happiest moment: At the playground ;)
Suffocating in your care, concern and love.

I hope i can balance those things right...

-Use com still need limited hours want ar. Dont think you are my dad so you can like that lor. I sincerely say fuck.

- I dont care already. Let it be anyway this is life. I hate life. I sincerely hate life.

- Why is it always so whack. What is me? I sincerely hate myself.

Do you really think you can control me by force?! I dont think so. Im stubborn so are you. You do this to me I will do the opposite! Fuck this house!

Im sorry. Please please forget. I will be gone soon. I will cherish it if you are willing to give me another chance. -sniff-

I dont wanna think anymore... Thats the way i am and thats too bad.

Finally we are back together again
But now all efforts are in vain
I wanna sit forever in the train
I wanna walk forever in the rain
I'm at loss and nothing gain
Our memories kept appearing in my brain
I wanna hit myself with a cane
Blood flowing out of my veins
All i felt was fucking pain
I try not to be insane
I try very hard to refrain
Myself from hiding from reality
But it is damn hard to maintain my morality

Please give me another chance
Please give me a second glance
Please accompany through the song and dance
I don't mean to offense
I know it make no sense
But I don't wanna lose you as a friend
So please give me another chance

Now my best friend hate me even a fucking stranger hates me too. I think the god hates me. The fucking mac stranger... Y does he hates me??? Like as if he knew me very well like as if I dis him. MAjor problems kept coming I dont think I can take it. Pls god help.

So much pretending
waiting for a happy ending
So long did i waited
So much time did i wasted
Mum finds my pillow wet at night
Friends dun even know if im alright

It hurts so badly inside pretending im not
Ever so deeply it hurt mending no spot
Tears pour through the lonely nights
Still pretending im not. Im just polite.

Smiling as ever. Frowning never.
Tease talk play smile
Please stop grey style
unease angry walk make way slow frown

Becoming apathetic to everything
Dun look as pathetic as it seems
Out?
Doubt.
Returning everything with a sulk
My whole lot of feelings at one time
Right now I have no choice but to end this rhyme
I have no lighter that burns much brighter
But i have a message for the god damn writer
Too bad your are not as pretty
Or miss personality
Im sorry its a pity.

Some day I just keep pretending. Dreaming of a different ending. I wanna hold on but it hurts so bad. I cant keep someday that i never had.

1. :)
2. Inconsideration of other people's feeling.
3. I wish we had not met again.

I had wonderful dream last night! The best dream i had in my lifetime. I dreamt im back in the band! Then my conductor gave me back the stock custom back to me. YEA!~ Then me and my Mr right dance together then i was like can feel the happiness in the dream. WOW! How wish im still dreaming. Haiz... Its over.

I hate the something that is within me. It is overtaking my mind; is controlling me. I can feel it. How i wish i can release this devil that is inside me. My extreme laziness is getting out of control. Im afraid i have to let it be. I have no motivation in my life. I have no motivation everytime i wake up in the morning. I cannot find the motivation in the morning to go to school. How i envy michelle. At least she have the motivation that makes her want to go to school. Her special *her. The way she always wrote it ya? How i wish i can find someone to motivates me...

Just as i thought. So my instincts were right on that day. Yo guys were out. I understand how you feel now.

... ... Like what the fuck?! Everytime i tryta change you guys started scolding me... Im so fucked up. My motivation immediately went down down! Thats what Im talking about! Yea i tryta change yea i wanted to quit smoking. And u know that aight u know that i didnt smoke fer days! Then what did u say today when i take a puff in the toilet. You immediately shouted at me 'I saw the cigarette i throw away!' shouted at me right away! You know my fucking flu came? Everything was fucked up. And today like fer example. I dont wanna go to sch because of that fucking flu u guys scolded me nagged at me. You guys can never know what im feeling. Yo guys keep asking me to tell ya whats on my mind what im feeling whats the problem why like that or blah blah blah fucking blah... How do u ever expect me to talk to ya. When like i ever started talking you guys keep nagging nagging and nagging and maybe ever scolding or say im ridiculous. How can i ever talk to ya. Anyway i dont see the point to go to sch. Maybe thats one. Fer N' levels. Then that nth else. I rather study at home. Its more more MORE effective that way. Take the physics fer example. I study study study and what i get? I know what u expected i will say nth right? NO. lol I understand it all! Thats what i mean. Im even one chapter ahead of the class. When i go to sch, I saw the teacher teaching those things and i know what they were saying like for the first time?

So now i finally understood. Im really just another person in the hood.


Sitting here all by myself.
Wishing I was somebody else.
Head in my hands, nothing to do.
Just thinking I was with someone, anyone, even you.
I’m so bored and I’m so mad.
Can’t go anywhere, because im fat.
Today is so boring.
Oh I know, I wish I was an angel in the great sky soaring.
Life can be fun, life can be boring.
Here I am now, listening to my dad snoring.
All the other kids out playing at the park.
From when the sun comes up until its dark.
I wish I could be them.
Oh I wish I had an M&M.
Here I am sitting here all by myself.
Wishing I was somebody else.

Homework, homework thats all i do,School, work, nothing new
Teachers pushing
Works rushing
All this stress
This whole big mess
It's just a hassle, i must confess
I can't wait till grad day
Or even my payday
Mayday Mayday
I'm going down
hit the ground
gather around
Homework, homework thats all i do,
School, work, nothing new
I have a life
how about you?
English, Biology, Algebra 2
I could add more
Oh, what a bore
There's no more room to store
My brain is packed
A long days task
I just wanna relax
Is that too much to ask?

Haiz... i hope all of this never happen

Im so not right down pissed off. Im just literally pissed by ur 'pissed'. I dont think we should carry on this way. Yea and whats the big deal anyway?! Ur just another clone freak of that girl ur pissed off by. Huh! Ur just as easily tempered as her huh. U know. So whats wrong with me getting back at u? Yo did that pretty soon everytime as i get u too. Everybody does that too so whats wrong dude! Just because im easily bullied? But dude yo got me in get back mode so whats the shit about that dis? But whether is it stating me i do not know but i know one thing that if it stating me then yo so over! Come on! I am so sorry that yo didnt see through me right from da start[like as if i am that sort!]! I am sorry that Im the one THING in ur life that isnt perfect! And you know what its none of my BI business! And if yo wanna carry on, go ahead and be my guest! I dont know whats gotten into you and i dont wish to know I just wanna get out of this childish games. And im so sorry that i cant be ur dog anymore. So is that what yo pissing off at?

Shocked? I guess you dont know me that well as I thought you would.

Shocked? I guess you dont know me that well as I thought you would.

Ok ok... You've got to stop man, you really gotta stop.... You are right pissing me off... Yea i admit im sorry i once talk about your future... But yo really gotta stop yo another version of fucking me... yea yer got it damn right fucking me... Whats so great about it? Yea yo can street talk all da way if yo want but it gonna sound whack. Yo not a true fan at all. Yo do not like his music yo just like his person. He gonna feel insulted and annoyed. So do not insult him by annoucing that yo a fan.... ... ... Are yo a dyke??? I would really want to have the answer to this insulting qn... Yo keep talking about yer homies and others and what exactly are you heading? Yo just wants ppl to ask you. 'Hey Who is that?''Why is that?''What happen?''Izit to the extend of 143?' Yo are just so naive. Yea U dont even know what is love. Sympathy? nah...

And blah blah blah fucking blah...

Im sorry mama...

Fuck it! I hate this house this family! Why am i born in this kinda family! This is the lousier family I ever guessed! I hate it i hate it i hate it! Why cant i have a perfect fanily?! If they decided to treat me like this then y bother to send me to this world! Change your charactor man! You are starting to piss me off! If you want to be like this dont blame me if i have grown up and be the same way that u do! You are so damn fcking calculative! I've never met anyone like this ever ever ever ever! You are so over! Im so amazed i can find such rare species still here... You totally hit and broke my nerves!

Thank you. Yo have just betray my trust. =)

The night was whack! Far from what i had expected! I shoulda listen to muh dad! A waste trip... In the end?! I had the runs! LAO SAIIIIII!!!! LOL. Luckily got xh acc me to toilet here and there... And luckily they went home already if not they sure complain me so troublesome... heeh... A trail of unwise and unlucky desicions... and the cigarette is taken by xy... damnit no more to smoke... Nth to brood over about already...

While i was surfing the web today... i spot an article which rose my interest more in strange phenomenon and psycology... I finally know the magician's secret and how he mislead and misdirect us... People with intelligence will be easily baffled by the magicians and small kids will see through his trick more easily than people with in telligence because people with intelligence will use their mind and through the theory and why is it possible.. but kids will use the power of their eyes and see where the coins have gone... They will not be misdirected easily because they do not have the basic knowledge to think through.
I have read another article on the phenomenon of synchronicity. Im amazed by those incidents of chances which people thought it was god which helped them through... The real reason or theory, no ones knows...

Haiz! Ytd and today was my fucking mock exam.. I guess i did not do very well ya? I just hope that god could enlighten me and change my fucking charactor of extreme laziness.. damn! So i can study hard enough.. The english paper 1 compo I did it halfway... I did not want to do it at first so i slept throughout then all of a sudden two teachers came to disrupt my world.. Then they kept forcing me to think of something ter write! So when i finally got a good one I havent finish the fucking bell rang. damnit!

After school we hang around outside sch then something fly into muh eyes and got tuck in there.. then fuck! My eyes was like burning! Then michelle walk past she call out then i couldnt answer her cause it was damn pain! Thz fer xy keep waiting fer until i finally dig that fucking dust out...

And i totally forget all about conselling! I suppose to meet her at 2.30pm but i stay in sch till 4.. Now i have to meet her at 5.30pm... damn... Im so so beaten...

Wookiez... Now i needa get ready ter go...
Ps: I still fucking think shes a fucking dyke...

This could descibe what i feel:

Just as your idea comes to fruition, you now get a case of cold feet. An irrational feeling may be holding you back just enough for you to tie up loose ends before pushing forward again. If your dreams were unrealistic, there may be no quick fix. It's time, anyhow, to try and bring them back down to earth.

The fat ass that is sitting on singapore has the dumbest little brain i have ever seen in his world of dumb arse! He had been complaining about greying population here and yet he is murdering his people over minor trivia matters! I cant believe that people can serve a life sentence just by having oral sex! That is totally ridiculous! What against the law of nature! Maybe is not allow fer christians but that doesnt mean fer THE WHOLE OF SINGAPORE!!! What in the universe he get the idea from?! What a useless lame snobbish law of fuckED up singaporeans. I saw a news that a minister or someother bitches says oral sex is totally uncivalized and that his mother also dont approved of it blah blah blah fucking blah. If yer bitch dont agree or you the bitch's son= Son of THAT bitch dont approved doesnt mean the whole singapore dont approved aight! Its just one of yer own wishful thinking! Go fuck yerself up! So why did u dig out people's hearts organs to other people?! Its against the law of nature also to me!~ We are meant to go to heaven in a complete body plus body PARTS! You are destroying one allowing another.. ISNT IT DA SAME?!?! If you want to do something do it completely! Destroying everything i've got to say against you! CAnt do that?! Then let somebody else so it fer ya! Stop thinking that you can control me!~ I will not be like the other singaporeans! Like a slaves to yer! No way! Those signaporeans have no pride! I sincerely spit on them! Well. Send me fer life sentence fer chopping muh own hands off. Kill me fer killing a dog! Whip muh courpse fer suicide! Do all you want imma not going to bow my head down to yer! Death penalty fer those who just killed ONE FUCKING BITCH?! Take a HUGE look around the world! CAVE BITCHES! Yea yea... Greying population?! Kill all you want! See if greying population will cease anot?! Fuck it! Use your fucking brains and think! Stealing and fighting can be send to detention camp .. fucking blah... You are a drama king! You are exagerating! This is a waste of manpower and talent! I've got more to say! Godamn those people that are distracting me in this fucking house!F-Fuck those ignorant fucking brag snobbish cave bitches! Bring yer glock stuff it up yo' ass. Lata playas!

Now let me just say I get pissed off in reading the idiotic letters in the Forum page demanding that professional wrestling be banned from TV because "they are eroding my children's values". What they really mean is, "I can't seem to control what my children watch on TV and I need the government to do it for me."

I wish i can leave this sickening place. Singapore is not meant to be lived by the poor. Only the rich can have a comfortable and respectable life here. A place where capitalism has won and has created a shit hole fascist city state. I totally say tt Singapore is a major shithole! They, being guys, are forced to serve in the freakin' Singapore Armed Fuckers for a freakin' 2 or 2 1/2 yrs. The allowance they give is so fuckin' little. After their studies & the army, by the time they can come out to work, they're already in their mid-twenties! That's how they marry and reproduce in late stages of our lives & yet, the fucked up government is still complaining bout graying population. I would say Fuck the government of singapore!In reference to the previous post, we get up in early morning to work/sch, go home at late evening or even night, slp, then continue the whole fuckin' cycle again. the routine goes on & on.

Singapore is the worst place imaginable, I could go on and on about all the bad things that are happening in this fucking shithole. This place is HELL or worse. I wish I had the courage to commmit suicide and end this suffering though I am not giving up. I am still comtemplating of ways to do this with minimal pain and also 'Legally' so the Fucking government cannot desecrate my corpse by whipping it for suicide.

Why singapore sucks?



How about a little quiz?
1) OK, this one is easy. In which of the following countries is oral sex a criminal offense, "unless performed as part of foreplay"?
A) IranB) SudanC) Singapore



2) Which of the following groups is considered by the Government of Singapore to be a dangerous and subversive organisation, possessions of publications of which and membership in which are illegal?
A) the German Nazi partyB) the Klu Klux KlanC) Jehovah's witnesses



3) How much cannabis resin (hashish) do you have to be caught with in Singapore for death by hanging to become mandatory for you?
A) more than 1,000 kgB) more than 50 kgC) 200 grams (enough for about a joint a day for one year)



4) The penalty for smuggling which dangerous controlled substance into Singapore is one year in prison?
A) HeroinB) CocaineC) chewing gum




The correct answers (of course) are: C, C, C and C.
1) Oral sex, if not followed by vaginal intercourse, has been ruled as an "unnatural act" under section 377 of the Singapore penal code which carries a maximum sentence of life imprisonment.



2) Jehovah's witnesses: How can anyone respect the government of a country that feels so insecure that it can't even let its people make up their own minds about the "Watchtower"? Actually, the reason Singapore jails all Witnesses or people found holding their literature is that their religion forbids military service as all killing of fellow human beings (remember "Thou shalt not kill"?), which is the same reason why Hitler sent them to concentration camps.
3) No one has ever died of a cannabis overdose. Scientists say it's about as habit forming as coffee and does not lead to harder drugs, yet the government of Singapore is prepared to kill people they find in possession of it. Singapore is unique amongst tiny countries (the city state has only 3 million inhabitants) in executing some 50-80 people every year, many of them for being found with drugs. Imagine if Japan was executing 3000 people per year and holding 400,000 citizens in concentration camps for using illicit substances and you've got things in proportion. Despite these barbaric punishments the number of illegal drug users in its five drug rehabilitation centres (where people can be detained against their will if they have used illegal drugs) rose from around 5000 in 1990 to 8700 in 1994 [1]. That means two decades after making the death penalty mandatory for a range of drug offences as many as 1 in 300 Singaporean citizens are now undergoing forced drug treatment, tendency rising...
4) Chewing gum: On the other hand, no one has been sentenced for smuggling gum yet. There was a case recently though where a 16 year old boy was sent to a detention camp for two years for being caught with a pack of cigarettes.UPDATE: In May 2004, the government of Singapore lifted its blanket ban on gum sales. 19 "medicinal" and "dental" gums may be sold in pharmacies, provided users show valid ID. Selling chewing gum without checking ID makes the seller liable to a fine of S$5000 (US$3000) and up to two years in jail.

Something really has gotten into me... i guess i dont really know what it is... Im so alone.. i dont know why im always alone.. The emptyness inside, you can see it in da eyes.. I dont know what is happening but i feel that something is changing inside me. I can feel it so strongly since last year til now. Can god tell me what is happening?!?! PLEASE HELP ME WILL YA! Stop dreaming! No one will help you now! I guess I cant carry on...... .... dont let me...

WHOOO HOOOO!!!!!! Ytd im sooooooo happy!!!!! I love ytd!!! I hope ytd can repeat man! But nvm i forward to the new year again! Ytd my crew and I when to orchard first and on the way there LOL some thing very funny happen at the mrt!!! lol But yt say she dont want anybody to know cause its really embarassing!lol!!! Then we walk walk walk.. me yt ly all tired liaoz then mich still want to walk so i acc her then ly and yt sit on the chair waiting fer us... cause they two are sick...hahahaz.... one had stomachache another had a headache... Then i and mich go buy a get well soon card fer them two hahahahz then i buy those glitter to throw ppl cause glitter will stick to ppl want hahahah its difficult to wash off... Then after that they get over their sickness already then we walk to plaza singpura then go arcade, eat, walk to wards orchard then change desicion go singapore river... then they is a party there! Then after that we bought snow spray and went in the party started playing... hahah then got one small boy keep spraying at us man.. then we four spray him back then he not happy all that... then i dont care.... Then i love those caucacians man!!! They rocks!!! Then after that the music start i keep dancing all that...Then everyone was having fun man!!! Then everyone was singing and shouting then all is english songs then my friends dont know what songs is that then they feel so weird there i suppose... lol... lucky i love english songs... LoL Then they started the countdown 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1!!! I RAN OUT OF SNOW!!!! GRRR! luckily i wear a cap then they cant spray my face hahaha! Boo Hoo Toooooooo bad hahaha! neni neni po po! LOL! Then too bad the party end so soon.. Then we go see the bungy jump... Then when ppl sit that ride.... i keep screaming DIEEEE!!! LOL very funny.... then finally we sit yt's dad cab home then i car sick i keep wanting to vomit... then finally reach home bath and quickly sleep then now i just woke up and write this thing... hahahhaz haiz im still reminising... lata!