new yr is coming!!! yr2006 was a busy and bad yr for my family, dispute and money issues keep rising. for me however, i was quite blessed to make the rite decision to join ethelother, and befriending.
From there i get to know many pple, some who helped me along the way, some who gave me memories that will last very very long.
I am also pleased to have friends in my science og who took the same module and stressed me to work harder.
Lastly, my secondary and primary school frds, who despite their busy schedule, had always made time for me. hope that our frdship will last as long as it can!

well most pple will think that i lead quite a meaningful life, join this join that, and lead my life to the fullest. indeed, it has! sometime i even felt weird not to go to club room for just one day lol..

so here's my new yr resolution:
1) not to expect too much.. from frds..
2) not to think too deep into relationship
3) to be there for my family, ah ma, aunts whenever i can
4) to study as hard as possible for the next sem
5) to work or give more tuition
6) to a good friend to everyone and again, dun expects anithing in return

wow.. met up with jes, yemin, tess and jingni yesterday for lunch. had some good chat. Jes to flyign to HK for SEP, think the same uni as Yvonne and YS. sigh one more frd gone for one sem.
i then met up with James, Mayi, Denise and Peixian and Jus Noodle for some chatting, i simply just loves my og.. the pple are so so so nice! yea. As mentioned, Denise, YC and Jooch are leaving for SEP in Germany. meaning next sem, there hardly anione in Ridge View Residence le.

Went over for CSC chalet and Coasta Sands ECP, ended up staying over, cos there's many pple i know and i like staying over.
somehow i regretted doing that. thanks Eugence for trying to counsel mi, it's just mi i guess. my stupid over-sensitivity and over-thinking and over-expecting often make me ended up alone. hmm.. pple just say, then dun la.. but .. i tried, and well, everytime i get to know someone, somehow the hope arises that ya.. this could be the one? but then, i just ended up in disappointment, cos i'm not that one despite how hard i tried..

well, below are SLP's outing to Settlers' Cafe at HV, simply loves that place and the pple.

Part 1

Part 2

---

finally GAW 2006 is over!
i really had a very very good time yesterday! loves my OC!
been busy doing CSC stuff for the past few days. SLP and GAW, and finally, i can put my full concentration into SLP stuff now.

suddenly i felt like i have nothing to post..except for the fac that i'm very very tired haha..

Module Code Module Title Grade
ES2007S Professional Communication B
MA1104 Multivariable Calculus B+
ST2137 Computer Aided Data Analysis B
ST3131 Regression Analysis B

well might not be very impressive to most, and definitely below my expectations. i was thinking of 1 A.. sigh.. but well, at least i did not score as badn as last sem and my cap improves! dunno how hard is it to hit 3.7, but that's my target.

wow... haha it's been a week since i last entered my blog.. too tired le..
hee

well other than monday, i've been in school everyday for both SLP and GAW.
tiring.. it is really tiring, and school term seems to be more slack than holidays lol.

but it's a commitment i promised and i enjoyed most of it. so no regrets.

just recieved news from fred that i got a Bronze color award! yeah! i love the club, i love the pple and i want to be with the club. so this regconition proves my love for the club! will strive hard to get a gold award haha!

so many frds are leaving mi soon. Denise, YC, JC, Yvonne, Yongsheng and Jes.. wow.. all flying off.. good luck pple. enjoy ur SEP!

ending msg:
All my bags are packed, I'm ready to go
I'm standin' here outside your door
I hate to wake you up to say goodbye

But the dawn is breakin', it's early morn
The taxi's waitin', he's blowin' his horn
Already I'm so lonesome I could die

So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go

'Cause I'm leaving on a jet plane
I don't know when I'll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go

finally!!!! the mostt shiong part of GAW is over, the dreaded EXTERNAL DRIVE...
haha but still i had quite a lot of fun in GAW.
know many many friends from GAW, friends who helped in all aspects, inside and outside of GAW.
many many thanks to Denise, Yuncai. damn, dunno how life will be with both of u gone for SEP.My dearest wish cell members, Da Jie, Limin and Xiao mei(s), Christine and kit. You pple are excellent mates for the project and each of you had your own strength which add up to an unbelieveable fun and memorable journey for the past 6 months.

To my dearest freshies, Matt and Peixian, see? thank me for pulling u 2 into gaw! enjoyable rite? must come to club room more often hor!

To Tan Ching, Boon Song and Yongfeng, u guys are really very hardworking ( 2nd to my cell;p) and great job on the tree! though i didn't help much, i'm still very touched when i saw the display. and tan ching, the sharpest tongue in the town.. ruthless style of speaking always left me speechless haha. YF, stop playing dota...

To Terence, Shifeng, Guang Yu and Tran, uncle terence, i can still remember mi slamming the table when u told me u're only my age. Guang yu!!! must meet up and go home together haha but most likely no more chance le. Shifeng, super sweet gal.. dun always bully mi hor haha. thanks for all the help for CSL, and zhen fa :)
Tran, u make be believe that foreigners can also help out in community service. You're change a hard worker working quietly behind and yet always managed to get thigns done. you pple are just superb!!

To Pui and Janicia, pui, u're a great leader! must be more brave in presenting ok? but u did a wonderful and systematic job in ur management and Janicia, superb assistance and u, along with matt, perfected the Vm cell!

Ritchie, Cheryl, Puay Fang, sorry to type this so early. your job has not ended yet, but still, ur contributions in every aspect is really really well appreciated, Cheryl getting sponsors, Puay Fang helping wish cells( actually, she's helping Limin:P) and Ritchie, in all the shirt printing, games and ideas contributions!

Log!!! Melvin and Jooch, still remember melvin as welfare IC for sports day, blur like sotong.. but well, never improves anyway..Melvin, log is siong, but log is really the back bone for GAW, u guys had did so much work, so much OT and i had to say it's a job well done!! Jooch, super experienced and valuable asset in GAW, only yr 3 man and your expertised helped all of us in many areas! dun go SEP la.. GAW 07 shall employ u to be their honourary advisor.

ShiYun!!! you're not alone ok! i know u dun like the post of secretary and treasurer, but u had always contributed so much for GAW, the tree painting, the gift wrapping, and many other things. U're really an efficient secretary ( well, other than the time i had to take minutes for u.)

Denise,Yihua and XYZ, Big 3, thanks for everything. well, it can't get anymore simpler rite.

mine oh mine...

met up wih jason, jon and alwin after my gaw stuff yesterday evening. Jason treated me and jon to Ajisen for ramen, first time there, the food is not that bad. thanks jason for that belated birthday treat.
we then met up with cheekiong and bidded farewell to alwin at kovan mrt. Jason jon and cheekiong came to my place and we played mahjong for 3 hrs. before Cheekiong went home.
jason and jon and me chatted, watched shows, listened to songs till ard 3 plus before we went to sleep.. had ourbreakfast @11.30 @ the hawker centre by heartland mall this morning.

hmm.. today is the supposedly befriender's bbq.. but in the end the attendance is not good.. lotsa last mins fly kite.. sigh.. think i give the notice too late and hence no one wanna go.. not blaming anione, but just that i'm a bit tired..
but in the end, the befrienders and befriendees there had a very good time..
as usual, ziming's place is cursed with BBQ rain.. and this time, we had to hide under the big pool umbrella and bbq the food.. 2nd time this yr had i done so, first was during group 3 chalet haha.. so fun.. and so wet lol.

hmm, despite the small size, i have to say that i enjoy the session more.. i dun need to rush to have the foos out since there's only 7 of us and that everyone is chipping in, haha..
some interesting stuff, after defrozing the prawns, some of the prawns came to life.. lol.. the gals was freaked out.. especially kit haha.. cos we decided to peel the prawns' shells before bbqing it.. and the one kit peeled, happened to be still alive.. and the legs are wiggling after she peeled it..
so in the end we just throw the prawn(peeled and unpeeled) down to the mesh and one is it jumped up!!! haah.. scary..
after everything we then played with the box of starters, forming shapes and words.
well, certainly it was not as enjoyable as it's meant to be, but still we had so much fun..
i think i will not organise events anymore.. sigh.. i had rejections. well until i start to miss pple then i'll do so ba.. but until then, i shall not get this on me again..

arhh... i wanna die.. so tiring.. everyday going to clementi is so crazy~~

yesterday went back to move my stuff.. ALONE!!! so much to pack, so much to throw and all i need is a frd to help me carry down.. so hard..
i asked a friend of my whom i only know for 3 weeks to help, but i asked him too last min and he was like sorry.. i got test tmw.. would have help if i can.. but it's too late to rush down.. it's 8pm though...
then he asked mi a interesting question, " where are your friends?"
i was like.. dumbfounded.. is it the word?? cos i dunno what to ans..

aniway.. i left at 11..
today is clementi SCS befriender's training session, not bad, but seems to have quite little activities to play.. near dozing off haha.
went to sing with SLPiggies fred, ZQ, calvin, Xiao Li, shi Yun, Crystal, and Feng-er were there, had quite a nice session!! yea!
just returned home tired, and left only 20 cents in my wallet lol.. die...

oh my.. my ear phone is spoilt!!!! arhhh!!! one side deaf... so so so irritated!!!!
i want a new earphone, if not a headphone!!! those cover the whole ear one!! seems so comfortable! haha.. emm.. that is if i can survive the next few days since i might not even have money for lunch le...

feeling.. very very very guilty...

miscommunications, bad time management.. i had screwed things up..
firstly, yesterday after my wish cell meeting, i'm suppose to meet up marketing cell of SLP to do calling.. in the end, i came too late, things are done.. and i was very busy with my wish slips.. then hor.. when i finished the stuff, it's closed to 5 and i i did not managed to get to the incharge in my calling list.. sorry....

today i'm suppose to prepare paint to Pub for slp.. i did it, but later there's an SLP meeting for heads, which i'm not aware of until calvin smsed mi!! omg.. i thought i just need to help pub out in their stuff.. in the end i didn't go.. and i heard log was 'arrowed' omg!!! how how.. sorry travis..
didn't really help VM slp out later for their souvenir thinggy.. did about 5 ugly piggies with them before i have to rush to my aunt's place for dinner.. was threatened by my aunt that my mom cannot da bao for me, even if i dun come!!( cos i asked her to cook a dish for mi ma..) so bo bian have to rush down.. sigh..
sorry vm...
to make the matter worse, i got Befriender training session on monday! but it clashes with RVP head meeting and SLP meeting at AMK.. personally i wanna go for SLP meeting, cos it's nearer and i wanna be more committed, but befriender's training session is a no choice thinggy, it's compulsory.
sorry slp...
i felt so bad, very scared of pple scolding mi things like "cannot commit then dun join la!!!" and i felt especially guilty when marketing is so tired in calling and i didn't really help out as much as i wanted to.. wt... sobz..

now is the moving out part.. my roomie left so much of his stuff in the room!!! is he moving out? or has he gotten the holiday accomodation?? if he does, then i dun need to move my stuff le!! save money! esle i need to move my stuff back home and cramp that small little space left in the room..sigh.
sorry to all my friends, luke is really broke..really.. i dunno how am i going to live for this holiday...

exams' over!!

Finally my paper is over!! yea!!
my toughest paper this sem, wt.. only 40% and yet it is set so hard.. damn it!!!!

but well, it's over, no need to brood over it!! haha.. went to vivo with my stats khakis, saw a few pple, Dr terence tan and steptan later both from my medical centre.
then i saw pui, benni, kenglim, shih kuang, junli when i'm about to leave and later, i saw chloe and Lijie at the best stop!! wow, everyone's there!!! haah

shall find a time to watch movie there.. i long wanted to try the place there, and also cathay and lastly great world city.. haha, i wanna watch movie!!!

hmm.. shall slowly carry my stuff home from tmw onwards... since i got quite a few to bring back...

tiring.. now back to my hostel... and slacking watching badminton...

one more!!!

Yes! one more paper and i'm a free man!!! tmw at 7 i'll be offically free!!! yes!!
and then comes the problem of moving out.. sigh... who is free to help??

was looking at my stuff, haha, not a lot.. but sure needs more than 2 hands to bring it back..

aniway, i'm dying from boredom.. arhh.. tired.. go sleep first, shall study later..

went out with keven yesterday for dinner.. had a walk ard vivo city..
wow.. it's really big and beautiful.. one more place to go next time.. haha, at least ps will not be so crowded le.
dying to try the cinema there, haha but exams is not over.. so shall not do that..
doubt i have the money to do it after my exams aniway..


went to harbour front shopping centre for dinner, as we stood at one of the exits looking at the cruise, there happened to be a firework display..think from vivo side and from our position, it was very clear and beautiful!!! super nice!!

went back home, CL sms mi to say he's attached, really happy for him!!congrates!!!

aniway was listening to this song.. really beautiful.. i hope someone will sing it to me man!!! haha

Don't give up
It's just the weight of the world
When your heart's heavy
I...I will lift it for you

Don't give up
Because you want to be heard
If silence keeps you
I...I will break it for you

Everybody wants to be understood
Well I can hear you
Everybody wants to be loved
Don't give up
Because you are loved

Don't give up
It's just the hurt that you hide
When you're lost inside
I...I will be there to find you

Don't give up
Because you want to burn bright
If darkness blinds you
I...I will shine to guide you

Everybody wants to be understood
Well I can hear you
Everybody wants to be loved
Don't give up
Because you are loved

You are loved
Don't give up
It's just the weight of the world
Don't give up
Every one is to be heard
You are loved

You are loved(don't give up) by Josh groban

st3131

finally.. one more down. left with 2 more papers and my mind is already flying to clementi k-box, genting, the world of final fantasy...

i wanna sing, i wanna see, i wanna seek.

anyway yesterday paper was quite ok, but hor, i'm very worried, cos everyone says it's doable, that means the result curve will be very bad... sigh.. but well, can do can le.

went to club room just now.. hide myself behind the com.. cos pple starts coming in.. and when i talked, no one listens, so i shall hide there ba..
in the end i couldn't stand it.. i drop the plan to study in there, and went back room..
sigh.. i hate the world, i hate myself.

wt.. i went home on sat to found out that i was lock outside the main gate of my apartment...
they fixed the door lock le.. so now u need to tap cards to enter.. and i dun haf them..

thankfully after waiting for 30mins someone drove back and open the big gate for me..
and wat's worse is that.. my dad's at home!!!! then why didn't he answer my phone call??
sigh.. he has the habbit of not listening to phone calls.. cos he knows it's not meant for him..

aniway, how i also hope that i can be like him, not responding to things that not meant for me. tried again, and again and again. When will i learn?? maybe never.
my love always end before it has even started, and the only one that started, ended terribly which i shan't discuss.

back to studies, sigh.. not going with my schedule, i'm supposed to start my help sheet and begin with ma1104, but now, i only complete st3131, skim through my notes and then read through st2137... so many things not yet completed..
how come pple can study everything and still remember it?? i studied and it's not getting in.. haiz... must read again and again.

ending msg,
I think I've already lost you
I think you're already gone
I think I'm finally scared now
You think I'm weak
But I think you're wrong
I think you're already leaving
Feels like your hand is on the door
I thought this place was an empire
But now I'm relaxed
I can't be sure

I think you're so mean
I think we should try
I think I could need
This in my life
And I think I'm just scared
I think too much
I know this is wrong it's a problem I'm dealing

if you're gone, matchbox 20

finally i finished my 1st paper!! yea.. 3more to go..

found out that benni is going to watch fish performance.. i also wanna go!!! she is so so so good!!!
sigh.. but i'm really poor man..

was told by someone recently " sorry, i think you are not the one i'm looking, the one that i can love and enjoy every moment together..."

haiz.. why why why.. i tried.. i failed, hopefully it will not occur in my papers too.. was quite sad over it. but thankfully yvonne asked mi out for dinner.. if not i will really die in my room..literally...
u never know, that a small thot, just a simple sms to ask him out for dinner, u might be saving a life..
seeing my friends again and to know that someone still think of mi, even i'm with those i tried to avoid, i gain the will to carry on... thanks..


ending song,
How could an angel break my heart
Why didnt he catch my falling star
I wish I didnt wish so hard
Maybe I wished our love apart
How could an angel break my heart

how could an angel break my heart, toni braxton..

mugging days are never interesting...
it is so so so boring.. and these are the days i craved to go out.. ktv.. play.. movies....

of course.. these are the days when i can't do all these..
somehow i hated uni.. or should i say pple ard mi.. when school starts, almost all outings are cancelled or stopped.. sigh.. and during holidays.. i'm broke broke broke... sigh.. how how..

progress is a bit slow though it's on schedule.. i think i give myself too much allowance to study.. shall finish it chop chop then go into trying out past yr paper.

trying to go club room less often.. not becoz i cannot concentrate.. just that i dun wanna see someone there.. no i dun hate u all.. just that i will be envious that's all...

oh.. thanks fred for the photo and the small note. it's very sweet.. and denise who encouraged me to keep trying and trying.
time realy flies man, last sem i just knew her through booth manning at nus open house and now, she's a really good frd wow!!!


from fred. thanks thanks


befriender bonding session

me tanching and zin during ahm...

saturday!! 6 more days to exam. chiem man. haha

aniway, liang came over today at ard 3. He bought mi this silly bear, that lies down and snore, when it snores, it's tummy rises up.. haha cute, but.. err.. not really my tpye. thanks aniway!! will cherish it. we then watch tv show till 6 and we went for dinner. then we returned to watch again hoho..

i also love evenings with my friends. it has always been so nice, so enjoyable, even if we dun talk, the presence of him being ard is enough, with him or my other frds, i dun feel the stress from the outside world.. thanks man for being here.

oh ya.. now loading random pics from my hp that pple took on my hp..

]
me and melvin at fongseng


me and matt in club room


zhihui, eugene, alice in SLP discussion


3 color pencil case!! so nice!


shhh~~~ didi is sleeping..

had quite a tiring day.. partly cos i only slept for 5 hrs.. today.. haha
went for lecture today, ST2137 lecturer is really sucky.. he only gives an overview of the whole module, like intro each chapter, which is more suitable for the beginning of the sem lor.. dunno what kind of revision is that. Got back my test paper, hmm so so ba.. think a B...

had my final ES tutorial.. going to miss my tutor, all english tutors are so good.. so far i had 2 and none had disappoint me..

this semester has offically ended for me.. and now i need to do is to concentrate on my exams.. must pull up my cap!!! though i know i might not be able to achieve it for i'm really hopeless when it comes to understanding..
"luke, dun ask question,u only confuse us only.."
haiz...

oh.. denise gave me a teddy bear very similar to the one on my blog.. haha maybe she sensed that i really need someone/something to hug..
she also copy the msg on the blog's skin down for mi.. so sweet!! thanks denise!!

and arhh!!! i'm so gian for a new headphone or earphone.. no.. my current one are working perfectly fine.. but i sure dun mind have an eshure E4C or a sennheiser headphone.. hmm been dying to get my hands ona good quality blue tooth headphone man.. haha below i put in the pics of these beautiful baby!

just when i thot i put u down and be troublefree, another two came in.. and ya.. i cannot avoid them like i did to u.. sigh.. i can only do this by forcing myself to frequent the place in odd hours.. but then i got jealous of the friendship they bond with others during those time.. how?? part of me want to hide and disappear. the other part of me want to stay close with them, and the last part of me just gets envious and sad when i'm not the one they think or care about..


Sennheiser RS140

Sennheiser HD215

Shure E4C

projects are really horrible!!!
stressed and tired by the projects, hated myself for being so stupid, unable to understand the projects and dun even know how to start...

stress stress stress.. exams are just next week haha, my first paper is on the 24th Nov.. study is not progressing well...
but well, went for running for 2 consecutive days... really enjoy the company.. haha.. the only time when i enjoyed running was in medic school with my buddy. it used to be enjoyable...

I want to be strong.. i tried.. i dunno how far can i go..
so what if u're nice, if u lack the character, u'll in the end be just make used and then neglected...
sigh, life's like that.. but well, it moves on, if only i can stopped here and cry...

Me

Wow.. this few days have been wonderful, stressful and sadly painful..

wonderful..
thursday, MA1104, fanny came to asked mi how's her new bag. haha, which i felt was too big for her..
then to my surprised it was for mi!!! wow.. haha.. quite happy..how they know i need a new bag haha and along with the bag is 2 t shirts.. a bit small though.. can i go lose weight first??
Friday meeting i had another birthday cake from SLP OC!!! thanks pple.. it was nice.
Today i went out with keven, i first saw a frd from camp, then i saw William, then i saw muk, then Murali, then EeJay.. wow.. how come everyone is at city hall??

Stressful,
mugging lor what else.. study is not making good progress.. shall create study plans for the next 2 weeks
projects.. just officially finished one and rushing for 2 others.. sigh..
special projects, GAW is drawing near.. and not enough wishes..

Painful,
This is awful.. i'm getting more and more paranoid, sensitive and easily upset by stuff...
1st, small small things like pple not talking to me are upsetting mi, omg.. i felt so ugly.. sigh..
2nd, things like pple meeting up, or met up together and i'm always left out, not informed, not thought of upsets mi.. sigh..
3rd, i'm been a bit fierce to pple i really really like.. what am i doing? destroying frdship??
lastly.. i'm never the reason for anithing interesting , good.. if she's not there, they're never there.. if i'm not there.. doesn't matter..

I'm over-sensitive?? i am i think, but well, i believe coincidence dun happen so often.. msn was silence the whole day..sometime i felt sad when i saw others msn each others...

ending song:
I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
'Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

Evanascence "My immortal"

and ns-buddy. if u read until here.. i want u...
sec buddy, if u read until here... dun worry so much
pri buddies, if u read until here... find some time la!!!!

Happy Birthday to me!!! haha, my birthday is on the 7th which was yesterday...to many many pple, who wished my happy birthday.. to my nus gang who treated me brownie. To Chin Chun, who wished mi all the way from USA! and Eugene"Koh" who smsed and msned me from Australia!

To denise, yuncai, christine who brought cake for me and melvin!!! and also eugene, Wenbin who was present.

but when the cake was in front of me and i need to make a wish, suddenly i dunno what to wish for. in the end, i made this sad wish. haha.. but well, i hope that it will come true.

Being listening to Sun Yan Zi, Ying Xin Ren and i felt that the lyrics suit the feeling. I think that it's time to move on,

i've tried, but i'm always invisible.

left alone

once again, i was left alone..
can't help to think y??
small matters just keep accumulating and it's crushing on me..
i'm not as independent as i look.. well well looks tell everything rite??
just becos i'm fat, i'm big size, it does not mean that i am independent..
i still wish that when i run my errands, my frd will be with mi..

you're different, u're a big man.. but am i?? i know i look old and it's really not my fault.. i just wanna be like them..

i was with them all the while.. and i realised i hardly get into their topic?? is it mi?? or what? shall remain silent through... since i know..it's useless..

weekend has been tiring as usual, with some project stuff on hand.. running errands
plaing heroes V, watching 'so you think you can dance2'
tuition as usual has been nice and was really glad to see my kid capturing the techniques in attacking questions.

i will change.. to be less expecting.. in fact i shall not expect anithing from my frds, 24 hrs later. that's my wish...

sigh.. becoming more and more moody..
maybe it's all those mugging.. which was not getting aniwhere cos i spent the time doing my work instead of mugging..
having so many careless mistakes in my work, my projects, my test..
what am i doing??

sometimes i felt really lousy having so many mistakes..

to :
I felt so useless... whenever i see u, u're about to leave.. i failed to talk to u, failed to interest u with ani topics i had..i hear u, joking and laughing with others, and y can't that be mi??
All i can, is be nice, be there and help u when u need one.. yet, when u dun need ani.. i can be invisible to u.. what am i??

I wanna be free, but i dun dare to break the cage, i still love the feeling i get from u.. and i dun wanna lose it.. but for the feeling, i've suffered.. i dunno is it worth it.. is it??

no ending songs...

Days of my Life

I had a wonderful tuesday yesterday..
Though it is totally packed, i fully enjoyed the things i had.
As usual , boring lessons till 4. Then i went with Zenov to Clementi to return some video tape, follow by the long-missed Tang Yuan..
Met my fellow befrienders at 6.30 and had a nice meal. i ate pork rib rice which was really good!!!

Had my final befriending session. sigh, i wonder will my kid remember him.. a bit disappointed to see the card, which he claims to and obviously has been forced by the social worker.. but still, i wish him all the best in his studies and hopefully one day, he'll understand.

Went back to club room... saw melvin , christine and Zenov.. and suddenly i had the urge to go jogging with them. My ippt is on the next day(today) but well i had care, had some good jog, singing, pull up bars playing session.

After i bathed, i came back to club room to study, it was like.. wow.. haha cos i wrote my help sheet and everything till 5.30am!!! and my test is at 8!!! but well, guess everything went well!!

Had project discussion today.. which was so happy cos it was almost completed, thanks to Will, Fan and Chip.. haha. then had my IPPT, which was quite ok, but a bit lonely cos i dunno anione there.

ok.. now i'm back at the club room mugging...

ending msg,

i've lock my self up..
in this glass cabinet
dun come and tempt me,
for u know i will give my all,

i've lock myself up..
in this heart with a lock
i know i want you..
but i know you will not reciprocate..

Boring

hmm.. didn't blog much this week as i felt that this week is really really boring!!!

Wednesday went to CSL for a visit, cos i think i should go see?? some may asked, for what?? (in fact someone did asked mi that and it hurts, cos his tone wasn't really welcoming..)
definitely, i'm not going there cos i wanna prepare to run for MC, iw ent there to have a look, since i joined clementi immediately when i came in and missed the opportunity to see if i will be interested in other RVPs that CSC can provide. anyway, the kid are driving mi crazy, but i have my fair share of laughter and teasing. hoho..

came back with matt, shifeng, melvin and eugene and we had a little sharing session.. err.. more like forcing mi to share;p

did nothing much on thursday other than doing my ma1104 tutorial and comes Friday..
i studied the whole nite!!!! haha well, had an 1 hour sleep in the middle and then studied for 1 more hour and i finished those i need for the coming test. ( again, a bit disturbed when someone wants to chase mi away.. sometimes i felt that pple just dun wan mi ard..) but well, discovered some interesting stuff, like EK snores!!! and from his other half, Quartz, he snores like that everynite!! haha, so cute!!

aniway, Christine and I went back to our room at ard 5 something and i slept till 11.30... but well, the "oink_pigs" justified her name by sleeping till 1 and lai chuang till 2.. haha

we went to develop pics at clementi and had oru lunch there.. then we went home.


Me and TanChing @ Petapis Women giving gifts for GAW!!


Limin Melvin Me and TanChing



My Cousin,Rui!!

ending Msg:
Sometimes in the middle of the night
I wake up cryin when I think of how long
It took to find you
And now that I have I won't be movin' on
Nothing can ever separate us
We know where we belong

All I'm asking you
All I'm asking
Before this moments gone

Forget me not
Don't forget what we got
Every day is surely but a dream
I found the sweetest of all things
For all my life
You'll be my light
With every beat that's in your heart
Oh baby please remember to
Forget me not

Celine Dion, Forget me not

To u, i saw u.. ur hair is longer.. pls cut it..

selemat hari raya!!!

watched death note today with kai at tm.. hmm the story was altered, guess to suit it for a movie.. but still, it is not bad.. 4/5 stars!!!
I wonder will L die like what the book says and will M and N be out.. but the way light killed L in the comic book is really very nice.. hope it can be depicted in the movie exactly.

hmm, then we went shopping a bit at heartland mall.. well, mi buying stuff for my parents ie.. and then kai came over.
he read comic book while i checked my mails, then later we played heroes 5 together haha..

we left together and i came back to my hostel.. hmm went over to club room to study.. well today i finished 1 chapter in my book.. so happy.. but haha dozed off at least 5 times in te middle.. too tired.. came back to room at 11.30 and shall rest early.. since i'm having tutorial at 8 tmw..

Ending msg:
I've found some chanterelle at the market this morning
I'd like to live in Rome, oh it would be such a good thing
Try to grow some flowers, the same I tried before
That's all for now
Oh yes je t'aime encore

But where are you
So far with no address
How's life for you
My hope is my only caress

Finally cut my hair, I hear you say at last
It's been kind of strange but you see I survived
When I'm asked I go out, I dance all night and more
But when I dance
Je t'aime encore
But where are you
So far with no address
How's life for you
Time is my only caress

Celine Dion , Je t'aime

hmm, nothing special to mention for this week haha.. quite a boring weekend i had actually..

oh ya, i'll be moving to CCK, confirm lei, blk 471... haha can someone go and burn down that blk so i dun need to move??

aniway, will be moving in Jan, so for those who missed my place, better come quick before it belongs to someone else.

Christine brought in smoked duck yesterday, yum yum, it was really great, then i got denise to buy waffle from PGP, another delicious snack.
Hmm, shall not nua animore, cos i realised that this "Nua-ness" is not really gaining good impression.

today is GAW meeting and we celebrated Uncle Terence birthday, went to clementi to buy the cake and need to hide here, hide there, make sure he is diverted out of the club room to sneak in with the cake haha..
but well, hopes he enjoyed it :p

hmm, his "uncle" is a nickname i gave and haha, so many pple adopted it, even denise, but wow, he is sure a funny guy, stay happy always kay??

went back home with calvin, who finished his meeting. and yea, been a long time since we chit chat like that on the train back, haha, quite fun!!! must do it more often next time.

ending msg:

And I will take
You in my arms
And hold you right where you belong
Till the day my life is through
This I promise you
This I promise you

N'Sync, This i promise you.

Sang by Melvin today as forfeit from passing the parcels, wow he can sing quite well!!! shall go KTV soon!!

Top 10

10 facts about luke: Not Such an Innocent Boy

1) I love singing
2) I like to hug
3) I still keep in contact with 3 primary school friends
4) I am very very weak, physically and emotionally
5) I dun own a pair of jeans and half only 1 long pants from sec4
6) I have 4 bear bears, 2 bf and of course, all just play play
7) I am bitchy in mature, but i enjoys taking care of pple
8) I had 140++ grammatical errors for my A levels GP Prelim essay
9) I dun like last minute stuff
10)I love beaches or anywhere open and has no pple

10 most expensive things I own: (more than $100)

1) My laptop/ mouse/printer ($2600++)
2) My Computer/ LCD/TV box/ graphics card and ram ($1800++)
3) My Panasonic, FZ 5 camera, 1gb SD card ($700++)
4) My Iaudio MP3 player, 30gb, pouch ($600+)
5) My Tag Heuer Specs ($600)
6) My PS2 ($350++)
7) My DVD player ($299)
8) My N6280 hp ($218)
9) My Casio Watch ($150)
10) no more le...

10 favourite shows:

1) Charmed
2) Ally Mcbeal
3) Dark Angel
4) Friends
5) Whose line is it anyway
6) Buffy
7) American Idol
8) Project Runway
9) So you think you can dance
10)Darma and grey

10 Favourite Singers/groups:

1) Fish Leong
2) Celine Dion
3) Mariah Carey
4) Britney Spears
5) Destiny Child
6) Kelly Clarkson
7) F.I.R
8) Lee Sheng Jie
9) May Day
10)Jay Chou

oh and lastly, 10 songs i have been listening lately

1) FIR - Fei Xin Bu Luo
2) FIR - Yin Hua Lou
3) FIR - Tian Tian Ye Ye
4) Mariah Carey - Whenever you call(thanks to someone)
5) MayDay - Sun Wu Kong
6) Atomic Kitten - Cradle
7) Lee sheng Jie - Ni Na me ai ta
8) Jay Chou - Feng
9) Fish Leong - Xiao shuo la da shuo
10)Fish Leong - Zhuo Tian

ok ending msg le..
I toss and turn in bed
Can't get you out of my head
Even though you're so far away
I need you here with me
Oh boy, why can't you see
That I can't live without your love
When I close my eyes
I think of you
Well I wish I had you here with me
But there's nothing I can do, oh oh

[Chorus]
Counting every day that goes by
And the tears that I cry (tears that I cry)
You don't wanna love me no more
Wish that you could hold me tonight
I'm hurting inside
Cause you don't wanna love me
Cause you don't wanna love me
Love me no more

Bardot, Love Me No More

hmm doing nothing this weekend..
sickening, the emptiness is coming back.. just like what he says

i hated it, but i know there is not way back.

chatted with an officer of mine in army, 25 yrs old, scholar,just graduated/orded now working in a bank earning >3000 a month.. had a new gf and planning to get married..

wow.. hmm wonder can i be like that. i was thinking that the ideal marriage age is also ard 25-28 haha.. but well..
i strikes to mi, that i really dunno what i want..
when he asked mi what type of gals i like, which i believe i answered many times.
but this time, i think deeper in and i realised.. i dunno...
being sweet is definitely what my ideal gal is like, but other than that.. i dunno...

gals to me are friends first, i never ever think that gals ard me can be my gf in the future, cos to me they're just frds, some closer than others that's all.
maybe i should really get a gf?? haha but still, when i look into what i have, what's my strength.. i realised, na.. i dun deserve one haha.. and the gals i know (mostly) are too good for mi le.

hoho

ending:

Don't let your head rule you heart
Don't let your world be torn apart
Don't keep it all to yourself
Just let all your emotions run free with someone like me
That's the way it should be
Someone like me

I know Its hard when you're feeling down
To lift your feet up off the ground
We make mistakes but doesn't everybody
You don't always have to agree with someone like me
That's the way it should be
Someone like me

We know the story so far (what you want and who you are)
What you want and who you are (Free)
Let all your emotions run free
You don't always have to agree
With someone like me
That's the way it should be
Someone like me
Someone like me

Atomic Kitten, Someone Like me

pictures from PAH Qing Gong Yan

hmm... sometimes i just wonder when i really need help.. who will be there.. who will rush down to be with me??

i dunno, i tried to offer my help when someone i care needed it.. most of the time it was rejected.. i tried to walk someone home, was rejected, tried to meet up with someone who was depressed, was rejected.. felt really useless and felt that i am not trusted sometimes..

then when i needed help, or when i needed someone.. who will come down?? despite i never show ani needs(cos i'm a guy) i still want ur presence!
pple ard me are rather fortunate in a sense, they got someone to be with them, stayed closed to them when they're down.. even drive down to see if they're alrite or even, just a walk by the beach...

who say that a guy cannot be emotional??
i tried so hard to know pple, to hope to become good frds, and all i got is nothing.. i dunno what i want, but surely i dun want that sense of being neglected, tat sense of someone chatting with u and u being so happily and this happily was never seen with mi. i will not be a clown animore to see u happy.. cos, i know, in ur heart, i'm just a clown..

ending song:
I won't ever be too far away to feel you
And I won't hesitate at all
Whenever you call
And I'll always remeber
The part of you so tender
I'll be the one to catch you fall
Whenever you call

And I'm truly inspired
Finding my soul
There in your eyes
And you
Have opened my heart
And lifted me inside
By showing me yourself
Undisguised

I won't ever be too far away to feel you
And I won't hesitate at all
Whenever you call
And I'll always remember
The part of you so tender
I'll be the one to catch your fall
Whenever you call

And I will breathe for you each day
Comfort you through all the pain
Gently kiss your fears away
You can turn to me and cry
Always understand that I
Give you all I am inside
I won't ever be too far away to feel you

Mariah Carey "whenever you call"

Thots

hmm.. sometimes i think pple are avoiding mi.. i think i shall not be overly friendly.. yes.. it is not a good thing.. not all people out there are willing to be my friends.

i tried, i'm tired..
when u're overly friendly, it seems that u're like a level below them, u listen to them and u are most probably expected to accept their ideas..

sometimes i realised that i cannot change the social norms..
what is wrong ?? with treating guys and gals equally?? or even more to the guys??
i only had 2 yrs of experience in JC with gals and we're not really that close. how do i know where is the line?? what if i gets to intimate?? lol..

aniway, as stated, i'll not act like this animore, back to the old junqi, luke is put on hold until he figures out a way to live up to this name.

ending song:
Steal my heart with every note you play
I pray you'll look my way
And hold me to your heart someday
I long to be the one that you caress with
tenderness
And you don't know
You don't even know that I exist

I wish that I was in your arms
Like that Spanish guitar
And you would play me through the night
'Till the dawn
I wish you'd hold me in your arms
Like that Spanish guitar
All night long, all night long
I'd be your song, I'd be your song

toni braxton "spanish guitar"

CSC MAF

yesterday was MAF celebrationfor CSC, had quite a fun time, taking pics here and there haha..too bad matt left be4 i had a chance to take pics with him.


AmunRa!!


AmunRa Again

Me and TanChing


BearBear No1, Jeremy!!Super huggable-looking guy!


Me and Engkhoon, who always 想我!!


Eugene, me and Melvin


Yong Sheng, DeRui and me


Melvin dearest and me


went with Zenov, Edlina, Zin, Ling Fong, Tan Ching and Jian Ming to Fong Seng for prata haha, after a yr man!!!hmm shall go there more often..



somehow i still felt left out.. trying to be frds with everyone and in the end, it's just frds.
I know, i can easily find someone to talk to and to console mi, but.. somehow the feeling is diff la. haha..i'm too demanding ba.

aniway, overnite hike for clementi might be cancelled due to poor response of the befriendees.. sigh.. maybe we shall just make it a befriender outing then, since all befrienders are on for that.

noticed that my tag box is down.. think it closed down or what. sigh.. shall go find new one soon..



Ending msg:
Have you ever found the one
You've dreamed of all of your life
You'd do just about anything to look into their eyes
Have you finally found the one you've given your heart to
Only to find that one won't give their heart to you
Have you ever closed your eyes and
Dreamed that they were there
And all you can do is wait for the day when they will care

Have you ever loved somebody so much
It makes you cry
Have you ever needed something so bad
You can't sleep at night
Have you ever tried to find the words
But they don't come out right
Have you ever, have you ever

Brandy, have u ever?

hmm... being in club room for more than 8 hrs... and my study time is only ard 2-3 hrs.. sigh...
where is my concentration...
"exam is coming!!!"
my attention span is like15 mins, like now, i'm typing away after staring the book for 15mins..

hmm, can help but missing so many things, especially Ethelonter..
somehow i felt i a little politics here and there in the club room, hopefully i'm over-sensitive..

Was realy glad that almost all of the befrienders are continuing for the 2nd yr.. which means, we're together for the next yr.. yea!! it's like we'll get stronger in bonding, we're get closer and we'll have lotsa outings, bbq, and this time, we might be able to have a chalet!!!

results for some of my exams are out, not really fantastics, compare to even my fellow local frds, but still i'm quite satisfied of the scores, the time and effort put in are justified.

aniway, i can't wait to move house, cos it'll be like a new envoirnment.. but on the other hand, i know i'll miss my old place, the convenience and frds staying ard there. haha, especially CL, cos next time no more supper le..

ending msg:
When you want it the most there's no easy way out
When you're ready to go and your heart's left in doubt
Don't give up on your faith
Love comes to those who believe it
And that's the way it is

When you question me for a simple answer
I don't know what to say, no
But it's plain to see, if you stick together
You're gonna find a way, yeah

So don't surrender 'cause you can win
In this thing called love

Celine Dion, that's the way it is

My Weekend

hmm, played badminton finally, after 1 yr lag.. but still it as a fun game, still being thrashed though.. haha

finally met up with my primary school mate, though sun has something on and he is unable to make it.
Quan is dying cos he just converted to mugger and is very devoted to muggerism..
kai is dying cos he just become nua king and is rotting away at home practising his nus skills..

and mi?? guess i'm just mi, hoho

well, had my last tuition, with my kid on sat, will miss him man haha, but also ,very worried that he'll not do well.. jia you!!
went over to Mindsville to help out with MAF celebrations, the residents there are so cute and funny haha, they just reminds mi of my cousin back home. innocent and harmless.
aniway, saw a few, drools, volunteers.. have to stay the standard there not bad hoho.
(shurks, later shiyun scold mi again)

ok went to my ah ma house and then went home ..

sunday was my another tuition, but was really surprised cos the mon told mi to carry on tutoring, yea!!which means that i could at least have a small sum of money for everymonth.. (cos i dun get allowance from my parents)

was at bedok library from 1-5, have to say that it was really really noisy.. sigh.. kids nowadays.. and parents are worse, making more noise than the kids..
...

ending msg:
I hate the world today
You're so good to me
I know but I can't change
Tried to tell you
But you look at me like maybe
I'm an angel underneath
Innocent and sweet
Yesterday I cried
Must have been relieved to see
The softer side
I can understand how you'd be so confused
I don't envy you
I'm a little bit of everything
All rolled into one

Chorus:
I'm a bitch, I'm a lover
I'm a child, I'm a mother
I'm a sinner, I'm a saint
I do not feel ashamed
I'm your hell, I'm your dream
I'm nothing in between
You know you wouldn't want it any other way

Bitch by Meredith Brooks

the first part of the lyrics is to this someone, i'm not as good as u think i am

MAF

Happy MAF to everyone.. hopefully the haze will not block the moon haha...

aniway.. nothing special this few days mugging and mugging.. haha
being sleep really late 2-3plus and yea. i think i managed to catch up quite a lot haha

weekend is coming, aniplans??

well i'm hoping that outing with my primary school frds will not be cancelled for sun evening, but there is a chance that i might not be able to make it..sigh.. pray..

last session for both my students cos next week is their final yr exam.. hai..$$$ going to be really broke.. do pass mi lobang ok.. math la.. i cannot teach other subject one...


more deadlines to be met, project, GAW and bla bla.. sigh...hopefully i can manage all these.

oh ya, playing badminton tmw with denise and others, it has been so long after 1 yr le.. i'm missing it..

shan't talk more about my emotional problems here.
comments:I think frds are someone who u can hve fun doing things together, but shall never shared ur emotional burden..

Ending Msg:
Did I ever tell you how you live in me
Every waking moment, even in my dreams
And if all this talk is crazy
And you don't know what I mean
Does it really matter
Just as long as I believe
[Chorus:]
I will love again
Though my heart is breaking, I will
love again
Stronger than before
I will love again
Even if it takes a lifetime to get over you
Heaven only knows, I will love again
People never tell you
The way they truly feel
I would die for you gladly
If I knew it was for real
So if all this talk sounds crazy
And the words don't come out right
Does it really matter
If it gets me through this night

Lara Fabian, I will Love again

Scary..

hmm had MA1104 test yesterday and ST3131 test today..
yesterday was fine, but there was some corkup today..

i was supposed to meet a donor for GAW to collect her gifts..@11.30..
then she called to say she'll be late and will meet mi at 11.45
in the end. she arrives at 12!!!!!!
wowlau.. i'm having my test at 12!!!! WT...
so between 11.45 to 12.00 i rushed to the club room and was really glad to see so many pple there.. so i asked, someone from GAW.. and even before i asked him, he was like, very rudely, no!!! without even hearing mi out..
sigh.. i mean, it felt really horrible..
aniway, i met the gal at 12, got the gift, rushed back to my room which was on the way to put the gift before running to science fac for the test.. i was 20 mins late...
sigh...

another thing that happens was that some of the closer frds from my module actually dun believed that i was mugging the past 2 nites, and their tone was quite hurting.. am i another one(condemned) ?

met up with Staff of OED cos of some project discrepencies.. but then it is ok..
what is a bit depressing is that my kid for volunteering didn't turn up for the session... he didn't reply my sms, didn't inform mi.. sigh...getting tired of it..how..

aniway.. anione wanna take ippt?? my window is closing.. and i need someone to go take with mi.. best can fail together:p

oh ya.. just realised my neighbour in OKR is Xiqian's good frd, what a small world

ending msg:
I wanted your love,
But look what it's done to me,
All my dreams have come to nothing,
Who would have believed?
All the laughter that we shared would be a memory,
I cannot count the tears you've cost me,
If I could have seen.

And do you ever think of me,
And how we used to be?

Oh, I know you're somewhere else right now,
And loving someone else no doubt,
Well I'm one for sorrow,
Ain't it too too bad?
Are you breaking someone else's heart?
'Cos you're taking my love where you are,
Well I'm one for sorrow,
Ain't it too bad about us,

One for Sorrow, Steps

fyi, i'm a huge step's fan..

Happy Birthday Esther!!!!
21 yr old lei.. dun worry, u always look like 14:P

holiday so far is not as fun, hardly played anithing.. sigh..
dinner this evening with primary school mate cancelled.. sigh.. it is getting harder and harder to meet up.

2 weeks later will be the end of yr exams for both my students, which means after that i'll be darn broke hoho.. shall refrain from spending money(well, think on subway??)

hmm, there is a very high chance i'll be moving to CCK.. arh!!!! i dun want~! but well, i saw the house le, very nicely done up by the previous owner.. and i like it a lot. hmm shurkss...

i'll be strong!~! thanks shuhui and fan..

ending msg:

I never promised you a happy ending
You never said you wouldn't make me cry
but summer love will keep us warm long after
our autumn goodbye, autumn goodbye
autumn goodbye

Thinkin' of you and the love of our lives
in the sweet summertime
so sad but true (so true, so true)
we must leave it behind
in our hearts, in our minds

From April through September
bittersweet was the love that we share
don't forget
I remember

Britney "autumn goodbye"
oh Mer's gonna love this ahah

hmm... am i very jian?? haha been telling myself that i'll forget u.. haha but i guess that self reminder ended up as a way of remembering u... wat the..
i still wanna be with u, but what's the pt? when i know that i'll expect more and more which u are not oblighted to fulfill it...hmm let it be ba..

aniway, went out today, had a wonderful KTV session, witness a higher level of singer. Not only are they taking note of rhythm, lyrics, pitch, they ever make sure the harmony is just rite.. wow!!!! haha, to pui, christine, yongsheng and calvin.. u pple are good!!!

met up with my dear AmunRa in the evening in bugis, had dinner in swensen. Han Chuen, LiXian, YuetTing, Matt, Weijian and Yvonne were present. had some gossiping fun, chatted a bit about school work but more on scandals..

lixian , matt and weijian left earlier while mi, yt, yvonne and HC when to walk ard in bugis..

Trying to find some book to read.. shall cultivate my reading habbit which i neglected since i came to uni.

aniway.. here's the usual:
記得要忘記 忘記 我提醒自己
你已經是 人海中的一個背影
長長時光 我應該要有 新的回憶

人無法決定會為誰動心
但至少可以決定放不放棄
我承認我 還是會愛著你
但我將永不再觸碰這記憶

記得要忘記 忘記 經過我的你
畢竟只是很偶然的那種相遇
不會不容易 我有一輩子
足夠用來忘記 我還有一輩子
可以用來努力 我一定會忘記你

SHE " ji de yao wang ji"

hmm.. half of the holidays gone and i only study a bit onli.. very guilty haha..
promise to study more tmw:P

life is still the same, busy with gaw and then slacking ard lifelessly

activites was cancelled one by one, ktv is postponed, outing was postponed.. hopefully nothing else willg go wrong this week.

well as expected, no one contacted mi.. msn can be left on whole day and yet hardly is there anyone who is talking to me, hmm well except a few la.
haha, sometimes when i saw some particular person online, i was hoping that he/she will chat with mi. haha apparently i expect too much.

my msn will be in away or busy mode from now on.. haha so that when no one talking to mi, i have an excuse to fall back on:P

ending msg:
I'm Standing on a bridge
I'm waitin in the dark
I thought that you'd be here by now
Theres nothing but the rain
No footsteps on the ground
I'm listening but theres no sound

Isn't anyone tryin to find me?
Won't somebody come take me home
It's a damn cold night
Trying to figure out this life
Wont you take me by the hand
take me somewhere new
I dont know who you are
but I... I'm with you

Avril Lavigne "i'm with u"

by the way i wonder if my reader actually scroll down till here and read the lyrics of the song, cos the lyrics depicts my feeling most of the time.

home. had quite a nice weekend..

woke up damn early on my saturday for my tuition haha 8 am..
then went to give tuition.. which i pushed forward cos at 11 i'm having PAH OC lunch!!
finally i stepped into dragon gate restuarant again. food maintains it's standard!! yea was quite satified overall!
went walking about with a few of the OC at douby ghuat. Visited The Cathay for the first time! shall watch movie there this week!!
Met choonliang for dinner in the evening and he came over my place later where we watch Silent Hill..
at the last time, the storylines setted mi thinking.. the power of religion..
of how far pple are willing to go for the religion..i'm so worried..
sometimes religion can be used as a very powerful too, when contents of the guidance are depicted in a twisted manner..and devotees are will to listen since they were taught that their leaders are always rite.. so what if?? the leader is not rite??
sigh..

aniway, my sunday started out with tuition, and i went home, drinking kopi eating bread in the afternoon and booking later to my hostel.. lotsa stuff to catch up..

I need to learn to be Independent!

Ending Msg:

couldn't tell you why she felt that way,
She felt it everyday.
And I couldn't help her,
I just watched her make the same mistakes again.

What's wrong, what's wrong now?
Too many, too many problems.
Don't know where she belongs, where she belongs.
She wants to go home, but nobody's home.
It's where she lies, broken inside.
With no place to go, no place to go to dry her eyes.
Broken inside.

Open your eyes and look outside, find the reasons why.
You've been rejected, and now you can't find what you left behind.
Be strong, be strong now.
Too many, too many problems.
Don't know where she belongs, where she belongs.
She wants to go home, but nobody's home.
It's where she lies, broken inside.
With no place to go, no place to go to dry her eyes.
Broken inside.

Avril Lavigne "Nobody's Home"

haha guess what, the bad feelings keep pouring in..
guess i'm been iconed as 'unrealiable and blur and dunno anithing' type of guy by my frds in lecture..
sigh.. what's the use of being a nice guy? when the most important thing is not there, ya brain and money.
i mean, how many of us truly look at each other from within??
i know those who are here do.. but when it comes to study, it's like working.. only those with ability will be highly thought of..

these few weeks, i felt quite outcasted. when i ask things, somehow, no one bothers to reply.. and sometimes i can't even get to hear whet they're discussing..

hmm.. guess life just go on.
thankfully i still have some great tok cock buddies in nus, which is really a ncie thing as being with them i felt much better...
think the low self esteem is coming back again..

aniway, i'm moving house!!! ya.. dun really wanna move far cos this is where i grow up in, the region lives my closests frds, pple who walk with mi to school, pple who grow up with mi since primary school.
still arguing with my dad, cos his work place is in the north... ya..CCK...
and i prefer to stay in the central..
or even better the east.. like pasir ris.. like the quietness there.
but ... sigh.. shall see how..

ending msg:
我送妳離開 千里之外 妳無聲黑白
沉默年代 或許不該 太遙遠的相愛
我送妳離開 天涯之外 妳是否還在
琴聲何來 生死難猜 用一生 去等待

hmm today nothing special.. lecture is as usual.. only different is that i completely dunno how to start my 3131 tutorial sickening..

GAW is quite ok, just that there is some small problems here and there.

went out for a walk last nite ard 1am.. it was quite a walk, too bad i cannot see the sea..

haha
came back, i 've sent an sms to someone, hoping that it'll end part of the saddness i always been feeling.. soon, i'll send one more to another someone..
hopefully by then, i'll grow.

ending msg:
How am I ever gonna get rid of these blues
Baby I'm so lonely all the time
Everywhere I go I get so confused
You're the only thing that's on my mind

Oh my beds so cold at night and I miss you more each day
Only you can make it right no I'm not too proud to say

All I know is I'm lost without you I'm not gonna lie
How am I going to be strong without you I need you by my side
If we ever say we'll never be together and we ended with goodbye don't know what I'd do ...I'm
lost without you
I keep trying to find my way but all I know is I'm lost without you
I keep trying to face the day I'm lost without you

lost without you, delta goodrem

u know when u're down.. there's simple things that brighten up ur day...
i was really amazed by the performance.. haha i also wanna be like him, at least..
sometimes i feel really down not having ani talents at all..




from cheekin

hmm... i dunno what to type..feeling a bit down..
still didn't find the circle i thought i can be..

was commented i'm very frdly, socialable.. if so.. why am i still out here alone???

hmm.. sometimes i thought yea.. maybe we can eventually be close frds, but na.. i'm wrong again.. neglected again and again.. it's just one sided...
think this has happened to mi since primary school, where someone i started knowing first always ended up close to other pple..

i wonder why..

aniway...
ending msg:
This is the book I never read
These are the words I never said
This is the path I'll never tread
These are the dreams I'll dream instead
This is the joy that's seldom spread
These are the tears...
The tears we shed
This is the fear
This is the dread
These are the contents of my head
And these are the years that we have spent
And this is what they represent
And this is how I feel
Do you know how I feel ?
'cause i don't think you know how I feel
I don't think you know what I feel
I don't think you know what I feel
You don't know what I feel

why by Annie Lennox

today is agm!!! was quite a nice and touchy moments i believe for the 4th MC.. i imagine one day, it'll be my turn.. but guess it'll not come next yr.
was really glad that the 5th mc seems so close and pple are really so nice.
envious?? seeing the 4th MC, i believe members of the 5th MC will wish to be like that. despite any disagreement they have, they're still so close.
one day..

aniway, shall throw GAW stuff aside for these 2 days, mid term exam coming up on wednesday, need to focus focus focus..

ending msg:
sometimes goodbye though it hurts, is the only way for destiny
sometimes goodbye though it hurts, is the only way out for u and me
and it's the hardest thing to say.
i missed ur love in aniway way
so say goodbye, but dun u cry
cos true love never die...

Finally!!! We have granted almost all the wish!!! 350++!!!

yea!!!
was really busy but happy with the things done..
sorry i could help much in the admin stuff..
to Christine limin and kit!! think u gals rocks, really power haha and most of the time i felt a bit useless.. sigh.. but well things will turn better..

was expecting a bit more pple i know to visit my booth, but guess they dun care.
well to chip, will, fanny, nic, joanne, yemin and tess. Thanks for supporting!!! becos of u all we need not set up the booth tmw.

sorry to ivies for staining ur billabong shirt.. really sorry...

Ending msg:
sometimes i just miss the time i'm by ur side, it feels like i'll not be that stress if u're here.

我不知不觉又徘徊在从前
秋风悄悄的呼唤听来尽是孤单
落叶的期盼片片左右为难
心走寂寞攀跟著飘进黑暗

我不闻不问也许好过一点
被遗憾关在房间挣扎只是拖延
无望的空谈一声声的轻叹
回忆扯不断怎黱摆脱纠缠

找不到方向往彩虹天堂
有你说的爱在用幸福触摸忧伤
两个人相守直到白发苍苍
自由的飞翔在灿烂的星光

找不到方向往彩虹天堂
有你说的爱在用幸福触摸忧伤
两个人相守直到白发苍苍
自由的飞翔在灿烂的星光有你在我身旁

haiz.. com is infected i guess.. sickening, msn down, lap top slow, mcafee down.. hangs and system restore doesn't work
dun have my recovery disc with mi.. now i'm really really sian haha

well, actually nothing seems wrong.. other than my msn..

was really busy this few days, think i'll withdraw a module cos i'm totally cluess what the lecturer is teaching.. and cannot do the tutorial.. haiz..

met up with my Og pple, was really fun, just listening to them, chatting and all that, love my og pals and hope we can really keep in touch!

befriending session was quite ok.. just a bit sian that after the session i didn't recieve a certain call which i'm expecting.. supposedly to meet someone, who never call me.. sobz.. but it's ok.. shan't expect too much from pple who dun seems to care about mi.

now.. back to my com.. i wanna die!!!!

ok.. apart from been drowsy and had been coughing for the past few days..
i organised befrienders' BBQ, did not really prepare well for it.. hence on the actual day, i was rushing here and ther with Ziming to buy drinks and food and bla bla bla..
thankfully things got settled down near evening and had a fun time cooking..
hopefully everyone enjoy the bbq..
came back to school and met up with denise, melvin and jooch and we watch 'i am sam' together.. really nice, give mi 4/5 stars.
went back to room later.. cos someone fly kite and hence we didn't stay over in club room

went for tuition at bedok on sunday... as usual, a pleasant one.
came back to school at ard 1.30 just in time for lunch with the rest..
had subway..
discovered that i lost my wallet 30 mins later..
couldn't find my wallet..
think i'm a goner.. broke liao still need to pay money for all these stuff...
sickening..

haiz..

i'm sick!!!!
super sian
think it's a few months ago since i slept at 10 pm.. my god.. was so drowsy..
arhhhh

aniway, nothing much to update lately..
except Happy 21st Birthday to TC!!!!
glad to hear that u like the present..
i felt that it's the first time i've seen such a sincere present..from the heart..

haha.. other than this..
i wish to say ST2132 sucks!!!

i lost..
well it is quite expected, cos i think i did not managed to think on things to improve on the club stuff, which i really cannot think of.. sigh..

aniway, was quite sad when during the Q & A when someone who asked mi questions looked down after listening to part of my ans.. i knew i screwed up..

My competitor, wins it fair and square, no complains!
I'm just sian that i'm one more step away from the family i thot i can get..
this family, as i observed, are really close, they chatted, outing, celebrated birthdays.. and i hope that i too, can be like that one day..
Like what lixian says in her speech, she gets to know every cliques but not involved in ani, i'm different, i gets to know every cliques hoping to be in one of them.. which i never managed to.. now i lost another chance.. which might never come again.. next yr.. i'm too old for it le.. my committments, my confidence and everything, will forbid mi to go for it..
was a bit sad, when after the elections, everything is about the 5th MC. Unlike other candidates who lost, yet still able to be within later, or having more opportunities ahead, i left, feeling that i need to leave this place just for this nite..

i still love the club, i still like the pple.. i dun run away cos of that.. but maybe.. i'll regret when i look back. When many pple whom i can form better bonding with, was inside the family and i'm not..

congrats to all those who got it.. u'll be in a family that u'll never regret in.

to "c": thankfully u were not here.. think i might run away so that u wun see mi sad.
to fred: thanks for cheering mi up!! i really appreciate it!
to PF: dun be sad or sian if u see my blog, cos as i said, no matters who wins, we're still frds! i'm just envious of u, but never jealous !! so dun worry!

hmm today is quite ok.. except for my tuition, which i simply stopped the tuition after 45 mins as my kid is really not concentrating..
am i rude to just stop suddenly?? can sense that the kid really dun want tuition.. but he is progressing.. sigh... how should my stand be???

aniway, went home and took my pants and polo tees for sat elections, and i had not finalised my speech !!!! omg.. panicking now.. dun even know am i writing the correct way..
thankfully i had like 4 hrs before my turn and yea.. will do my best.. challenge myself.. shall not repeat the nightmare in primary 3 where i forgot my story during the story telling competition.. sighz...(guess that's when i got stage phoebia, or is it the p1 dancing where i forgot my dance steps??)

well, today is COMEX!!! and i wanna go down.. choi melvin for sunday's event to see see look look, hopefully he remembers, if not i hata go down alone..

ending msg:
Would you dance,
If I asked you to dance?
Would you run,
And never look back?
Would you cry,
If you saw me crying?
And would you save my soul, tonight?

Would you tremble,
If I touched your lips?
Would you laugh?
Oh please tell me this.
Now would you die,
For the one you love?
Hold me in your arms, tonight.

Hero by Enrique Iglesias

kids.. angel and demon..
well wednesday was my shortest school day.. ends at 10..
decided not to go for swimming as i have a few tutorials to catch up with..

went to christine room and chat a bit, ate subway in the club room and ended back up in her room with fred, yvonne and yongsheng to play bridge..

aniway.. SORRY SORRY X1000000 to my medical platoon frds.. i forgot that today is our gathering that we agreed on.. was really shocked when CH sms mi about the gathering...
hope u pple enjoyed urself. i really missed chatting with u guys and hopefully we can find time to meet up again!!!

went to this particular home instead(which clashes with the outing). Denise, Terence, XYZ, YIhua and my beloved Melvin accompanied me there, where i saw kids turning into devils.. arhhh... haha, fun, but really really tiring..
came back at 1130.. and thankfully i'm not staying at home..

(ps.. my hp charger is spoilt, or is it my hp is spoilt... dun scare mi...)

Ok, sounds like getting myself all occupied with work doesn't really work here hmm..
Still fill my head with personal problems haha.. and methods i used didn't works =( some of u know what) and that i just cannot help thinking lol..

aniway, ya.. tutorial for ST2132 was like super hard lor.. dunno wth is the lecturer talking about.. i think all tutorial should be made 2 hrs instead of 1hr.

i know most of u will wanna kill mi, but it is really really not enough for mi to understand.. is it mi??

today orientation visit was quite ok.. ard 10 turn up i guess.. a bit expected and well, hopefully most of them are ok with the presentation and are interested to sign up!!!

went to ginza plaza with my befriendees and Kaiting and hers, which was really good!!!
cos i found a really cool comic shop in a corner with fantastic chinese games that i cannot find in other places!!!
shall find time to visit the place more often.

ending msg:

Every time I turn around
I think I've got it all figured out
My heart keeps callin' and I keep on fallin'
Over and over again
This sad story always ends the same
Me standin' in the pourin' rain
It seems no matter what I do
It tears my heart in two

The touble with love is by Kelly Clarkson

well, i moved in..
it wasn't as back as i thot.. thanks denise for helping mi to bring up my stuff..
the room doesn't look as bad as i first saw it.. guess it's also cos my roomie has cleared up part of his stuff:)

forgot to bring a rag.. which is a big Big BIG mistake!!!
haha went to club room to get a rag and clean up the room, which is like super super dirty!!!
something to be thankful for.. is that the room is just outside to busstop, which means similar to last sem, transportation will be very comvenient..
something not to be thankful for is that i'll be most prob woke up by the sound of bus..
so far things are quite ok with mi and my roomie, we chatted a bit, intro a bit and he is quite ok.. and thankfully the genre of music he listens to are acceptable!
other than that, i've nothing to complain about this room!!! oh.. other than the neighbour who keep playing this tazan 'arh~~ahaha~~' thinggy through their com which is super irritating..

ending msg:

Why – why are we still friends
When everything says
We should be more than we are
And tell me why every time I find
Someone that I like
We always end up just being friends (Just Being Friends)

I would hate for you to find somebody new
Who you really love, cause it would mean losing you
But am I a fool girl not to say
If I’m always scared I’ll lose you anyway
Somehow somewhere I’ve got to choose (got to choose)
No matter if it’s win or lose
Now tell me why

Why (are we still friends) by 98 Degrees

how does it feel, when songs u hear suddenly come true??
in chinese 'seems like i've a lot of friends, but when i need them, none is ard'

aniway, not trying to reprimand ani of them, i still treasure them..
just that today was really frustrated, after having such a bad room, i can't even find anione to help mi move in..
sigh..

ya, get some of ur frds to drive u there.. how?? who can? i tried asking.. ard 5-6 pple and none is free, or available to help.. maybe it's just the timing,or maybe...
aniway, this situation happens everytime when i'm moving in or out of the house.. i'm getting really sick of it sometimes..

Was thinking of moving my stuff to nus, then study in the library, but i spent 8 hrs trying to find someone to help mi out.. and all i got is disappointment..

no.. dun come and tell mi.. 'why u never ask mi??'
cos either i know the outcome or i anticipated the reactions and i dun want to listen to more rejections. i had enough for today and the past 21 yrs of my life...

aniway, thanks Zihui for trying to cheer mi up

ending msg:
Knew the signs
Wasn't right
I was stupid for a while
Swept away by you
And now I feel like a fool
So confused,
My heart's bruised
Was I ever loved by you?

Out of reach, so far
I never had your heart
Out of reach,
Couldn't see
We were never
Meant to be

Catch myself
From despair
I could drown
If I stay here
Keeping busy everyday
I know I will be OK

Out of Reach by Gabrielle

hmm today was really depressed, guess i have no choice but to move in.. sigh.. i dunno what to do.. my roomie is really unfriendly and the room is really small.. haiz..

anyone who can help mi please.. help... i'm really sian.. felt like crying..

hmm went to register room with Melvin and Eugene, they got Kent Ridge hall, which is like so nice.. and wow, the pple there, so friendly and handsome(drools.. wait a min..it should not be me drooling..), unlike mine, who seems super hostile and even told mi that he hope to stay alone.. sigh.. which is the first thing he told mi.. pray hard ba..

well, stayed in club room, did my GAW wish stuff which ended up very irritating, cos the calls weren't picked up. Celebrated Chloe and YC birthday and went settlers with group 1.. quite nice.. hope that our own group can be like that
finally found someone who has the same birthday as mi.. it's Melvin!! i know we were destined!! haha, think he'll stay 1000000000m after hearing this

sigh.. came back home, was greeted by the news that ziming couldn't make it for tmw's orientation, which is really really bad.. cos then there's no one le.. how!!!
My fault.. i didn't remind him, now i'm really lost.. hopefully things can be rite..
everything seems to fall apart for now and then next week is the MC elections..

haiz.. i really really feel like crying..

Ending msg:
Let the rain come down and wash away my tears
Let it fill my soul and drown my fears
Let it shatter the walls for a new, new sun

A New Day Has Come by Celine Dion

Haiz... was late again today.. thot the timing was just right.. in the end missed the 95.. i'm so so so tired..

not, i'm not blaming my commitments, cos i enjoyed it.. but the travelling was really tiring.. sorry to all those who persevere the journey, but i think u pple are crazy!!! i'm dying here hello!!!

was so happy yesterday that i got my room, but to my horror, it's a double room..
well not that i can't share room, but i felt that i deserve better.. my room mate was quite hostile when i saw him, tried to start a chat where he gave mi that, ' i dun wan u to stay with mi in the crammed room'..
then i was like, sigh.. how..
Old KR was really my choice cos i love the location(so far) but it suxs to have a double room, which is actually a single room size squeezed with 2 beds.. a roomie who is 31 yr old swedish who is totally ignoring mi..
Think i'll reject the offer.. haiz.. i want a room... can't i like.. get some better room.. feel like crying..

ending msg:
Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with eyes wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten

'unwritten' by Natasha Bedingfield

Oh dear,i am really very very tired.. guess will doze off after this blog..
any way, todays lecture at 8.15, which is like super early!!!wanna die there.. thankful i find the lecture interesting and hence i survived.
Went to do tutorial with nic and yea, it was relatively easily... onli if it'll be like this for the rest of the semester..

When to holland v with tess and yemin and had lunch at Crystal Jade Kitchen.. not bad, but the honey dew sago sucks..

when to clementi to get the cloth for the Thank you gift for GAW.. then from, there i took 105 to serangoon, where i went to give tuition, rushed back to NUS after that for GAW meeting.. sigh..
the meeting ends at 10 and i reached home at 12, cos that stupid 156 took 30mins to come.. thanks guang yu for accompanying mi.. haha !!!

ok.. as usual,
ending msg:

You found me
When no one else was lookin'
How did you know just where I would be?
Yeah, you broke through
All of my confusion
The ups and the downs
And you still didn't leave
I guess that you saw what nobody could see
You found me

you Found me, Kelly Clarkson

today was quite ok, overslept a bit, went to lecture a bit late, dozed off a bit and didn't understand a single bit..

went to club room after lectures to do some reading, which i did a bit..

Chatted a bit, played a bit, eat a bit and boom... 3 hrs passed and it's time to go down to Clementi Students' Care services for my session..
quite fun overall, cluedo first then meeting and chatting..
ended ard 9.30 and i reached home at 10.45..
still waiting for my hostel applications!!!!

Luke..

ending msg:
No I can't forget this evening
Or your face as you were leaving
But I guess that's just the way
The story goes
You always smile but in your eyes
Your sorrow shows
Yes it shows
No I can't forget tomorrow
When I think of all my sorrow
When I had you there
But then I let you go
And now it's only fair
That I should let you know
What you should know

Without You, Mariah Carey

ok.. my first day of week 2 was a bit normal,
came to school half an hour earlier for MC interview, ya, i'm running for VM(assistant)
something i hope to and gain experience for. Partly also i wanna to be closer to the club. Saw charles on the club room and he was nice enough to walk mi to the bus stop.. yea

aniway, went for my lecture after this which i was so-not paying attention playing with nic's N80, which has wi-fi function and it's like so cool.. haha
then went for ES2007 tutorial.. and i think i shall take a language module next sem, cos this tutor i had was super funny and my class got this guy called Jun Ji, which is an alpahbet different from mine, and he was super CUTE!!!! so blur during the lesson and i was like, wow!! hao ke ai!!! can get ready to make him my bear bear no5.

aniway, went down for tuition after that, took 1.5 hrs to reach my kid's place.. and was so so so tired..
met choonliang up for dinner(where he sees mi eating lor as usual) and we chatted a bit.. hmm, shall meet him up every week!!!
cam back and i spent 2 hrs typing emails, checking mistakes in my contact list and all that.. now my eyes are like super tired, i can see blur images of what i'm typing.. lol
so tata~

My 1st Weekend This Sem

Ok.. my first weekend is like wow.. boom ..
it's going away so soon..

friday evening was Yishun SCS visit and the session was fun except that my kid insisted on talking to the gal freshie attached to my side.. haiz.. so hao she.. and he's only 9 yrs old!!!

hmm saturday morning was tuition with a sec 3 kid.. i think that he is very fortunate to stay in bungolow, having room bigger than my house's masterroom.. and why is he thinking that he is not happy with his life??
talking about material needs, he has a good hp, a powerful computer and mp3player.
talking about emotional needs, he has parents where the mum dun work, 2 maids to help out and an ah ma to care for him.. so why is he not happy??
trying to help him to understand the facts of life.. hope he lives in no regrets.

aniway, evening went to my ah ma house, had a good dinner, was teased by my aunts lol.
took 88 to sengkang cos i'm meeting jianming, kunhong and renhong for mahjong session!!! haah saw mayi on the bus with her parents.. chat and chat until she alighted.
lost 8 bucks, but gained 8 hrs of fun, jokes and laughter!! so i think it's ok.. well if i can win.. will be better la.
went for tuition at bedok and then befriending bonding session at ECP.. omg.. how i just love group games!!! it was so fun!! haha lotsa of joy and laughter!! through each games i learn something new about how our life resemble the games we played! kudos to chris and Sengmeng for organising the games!! thanks!! dinner at MOS burger and i returned home at 9.30pm!!

i guessed that from now on... Tuesday and Friday will be my hell day..
oh no.. not because that i'm having community service on that day( well partly yes and no)
but it is because of my lecturer..
sigh... one speaks with no punctuation and accents.
one speaks not evening know what is he saying..

how...
shall try my best and read the text.. shan't complain much during class.
but i felt it is unfair for us to get a rookie for a level 3000 core module..haiz

didn't get the locker in science fac.. sighz.. my bag was like so heavy with just one of the text.. can't imagine it with 2 texts.
aniway slacked in club room a while, helping out in painting the pixies for GAW, and also played a few rounds of bridge.
went with Lihui and Ziping for dinner at FASS before leaving for Yishun SCS..
just returned at 2359

ending msg:
說你願意
I wanna be a lover, I wanna be a man
我只希望給你多一點
Can you be my lover, don't wanna be your friend
給你幸福每一天
因為我Wanna be your lover I wanna be your man
我只要你開心多一點
Can you be my lover, don't wanna be your friend
給你幸福到永遠

Cao Ge ' Shu dao Wu, Da Ying Wo'

hee.. today's st2137 is fun, at least i understand and found it interesting..
but tmw's both St lecture will most likely be similar to tuesday's, dreadful and dry.. sigh..

had MA1104 after that, lecturer was teaching some weird stuff haha which sounds so alien to mi.. sigh..
aniway, went to buy the text book for ST3131, and then went to club room for Outreach..

today is the final day and response is really good.. really really wanna thanks Mintun for helping out!!! if not i think i'll die, also to TanChing and Kit for helping with Clementi, Matt for bringing his whole group of pple down!! OMG, they're like so enthu haha!!! WOW!!!
Felt a bit sorry that i was too busy and forget about introducing them to other RVPs most of the time.. cos the pple just keep coming in one after the other.
Sorry Shiyun!!! shall not bully u for the next 7 days!!!
hmm da bao dinner in the club room and played bridge with Denise, YC and JC until 9 something haha..
aniway met Lihui on the bus home.


Me, Eugene(Bf1) And Melvin(bf2 and Eugene's husband)

Ending msg:
He drowns in his dreams
An exquisite extreme I know
He's as damned as he seems
And more heaven than a heart could hold
And if I try to save him
My whole world would cave in
It just ain't right
It just ain't right

'Beautiful Disaster' Kelly Clarkson

Oh.. I think from now on wednesday will be my most packed day!!!

hmm, woke up at 5.45 and prepared for school sigh.. dozed off here and there, brushing teeth, eating haha..

aniway , the lecture i had to say is better than the other 2 stats module i had attended, despite the lecturer is monotone haha.. but i felt that he is more interesting than those supposedly less dry module i had..

hmm, went back to serangoon swimming pool to swim .. alone.. haha couldn't get anione..
but it was really shiok.. hee, swam 20 laps as usual.. then went to a bench and sit down there, read my notes while tanning, caught bout 30mins sleep.
went for my tuition at 3 and ends at 5.. then went home to grab my 'lunch/high tea/dinner' coffee and crackers

went for my other tuition and ya, it was quite alrite.. guess i'm more or less used the giving them tuition and are more natural liao hoho!!!

ending msg:
Well I guess I'm trying to be nonchalant about it
And I'm going the extremes to prove I'm fine without you
But in reality I'm slowly loosing my my mind
Underneath the guise of a smile gradually I'm dying inside
Friends ask me how I feel and I lie convincingly
'Cause I don't want to reveal that fact that I'm suffering
So I wear my disguise 'til I go home at night
And trun down all the lights and then break down and cry

"BreakDown" Mariah Carey

hmm.. today lecture was what i say wu li tou.. as in i was really lost in it..
ST2132 still sounds alrite, but st3131 lecturer really a bit CMI..
not say they're not good in the subject, in fact i believe they are very intelligent if not hardworking, hence they are what they are today..
but then, they are definitely not a good leturer.. wth.. find someone who can teach la.. after all, university is a place to learn, not a place to invent or write thesis.. the focus is all wrong!!!
i really dun like the idea of paying 50 bucks per lecture to listen to someone who my primary school teacher can do a better job!!

aniway.. went for CSC outreach after my lecture..
was really busy.. came and was like LUKE!!! Luke!!!! sigh.. after seeing other RVPs having so many helpers, i'm a bit depressed by the turn out from Clementi..
but then, this is one thing i cannot force on, since community service is the main thing, outreach or stuff like outing is not the focus..
but still, i hoped for more participations from my side..
hmm thanks to Yvonne and Junli for helping mi to photocopy my brochure, Tan Ching,Tiong, PeiXian, Tran for assisting mi in explaining..
and lastly MINTUN who came back to help mi!!! thanks thanks, appreciated all the help!

aniway.. chatted wif my latest 2 bf when they came to visit( for mi of course!) and i left for clementi SCS at 7 for my programme..
played Cludeo, Uno attack and Scrabble today.. was really fun.. if only my befriendee come...

ending msg:
It's the hardest thing I'll ever have to do
To look you in the eye
And tell you I don't love you
It's the hardest thing I'll ever have to lie
To show no emotion when you start to cry