My Shitty Day

Literally.

My bearded dragon pooped.
I cleaned the cat's litter box.
The LA County Clerk's office is FULL OF SHIT.
WorkSource Oregon's Skill Advancement Team left at 2:45pm today and I showed up at 4pm.

I woke up to the sound of the heater turning on. I noticed the cat's heads perked up and started sniffing... and they were pointing their noses towards the blue bedroom, aka Darwin's room. I opened the door to notice an unpleasant smell and a giant lizard turd in her tank. Awesome. I cleaned that up and gave her some lettuce. Done.

I went into the laundry room to grab a shirt and noticed that Grimm was obviously upset with the fullness of the litter box... and had crapped on my carpet. Nice. So I cleaned that up, changed the box, took it out to the trash can, and washed my hands... again. Done.

Yesterday, I called the LA County Clerk's office regarding a letter I had received in the mail last week. It started that it had been over 30 days since a marriage license had been issued and said license had not been returned. It was an expiration warning; they wanted to make sure it was used and mailed back within 90 days of purchasing the license. I knew the judge had mailed the license the night of the wedding, so I wondered why I was receiving this letter. It should have been mailed and received in January! I spoke with a lady named Angela and she couldn't "find" my file. That worried me. She said she would call me back when she found something, but after seeing that my phone number was a 503 area code, she asked me to call her back the next day (which would be today), since she could not make long distance calls. Nice.

I decided to call the LA County Clerk's office this afternoon. I wanted to see if Angela had "found" my file. I called her back today and she still had not found my file. She thought that maybe my license had already been processed and sent to over to the indexing department... but that would take 6-8 weeks to find out. She also suggested that I apply for a duplicate marriage license. However, in order to receive that duplicate license, I'd have to get everyone, including the judge, to sign the documents... AND pay $30. WTF?! I have to pay $30 for THEIR mistake?! No. No way.

Angela was kind enough to transfer me to her supervisor, Toni. However, Toni was just as clueless as Angela, so it really didn't make a difference. Toni couldn't find Sam's name in the computer, so she asked for mine. I spelled my last name TWICE. She still couldn't find me. So I suggested, "You know, like George Foreman." And *boom* she found me. DUMBASS. Toni then proceeded to tell me that she had no record of me even purchasing a marriage license and asked which location I purchased it from. I told her I got it at the LA County Clerk's office in Norwalk. And *boom* she found it. By this point, I am starting to think that Toni is a high-functioning retard. Toni asked me about the letter I had received; I told her what it said and she informed me that it was "a generic notice sent to all marriage license applicants." She also thought that maybe my license had been sent to the indexing department, but it might take 6-12 weeks to find out. I am supposed to call back in one week and talk to Toni again. Awesome.

Yesterday, I also called the WorkSource Oregon office to talk to someone on the Skill Advancement Team. I called at 3:30pm and was on hold until 5:05pm. Their office stops answering calls at 4:30pm and the office is closed by 5pm. I was slightly upset by this, so I thought I would drive to the office today and actually talk to someone. After a quick drive up the hill, I got out of my car and walked in the rain to the WorkSource Oregon office. I stood around and waited for someone to help me. Five minutes later, I was told that on Thursdays, the Skill Advancement Team leaves the office at 2:45pm. That is not noted on any of my WorkSource documents... it might be online, but I didn't see that. Either way, everyone was gone and I was SOL... shit outta luck. I have to come back tomorrow. Super awesome.


I am at my breaking point, people.
Get your SHIT together.