When can we say we've been the happiest? What are our true moments of unbridled happiness?
These questions struck me today, for some unknown reason.....
As i spent the whole day in contemplation, it suddenly struck me when i was coming back from buying my dinner.
How many people remember, or have seen the joy and happiness in a child's eyes when he's given a scoop of ice cream, or something on an outing, and he didn't ask for it,
When its given to the child as a treat...
Think back carefully, to your own childhood. When something was given to you as a treat? a scoop of ice cream? your favorite desert? Think of the joy you felt...
I remember when it happened to me... Then i compared it to all the moments in my life up till now when i have felt joy and happiness.
Truly, that was when i felt joy and happiness....
Perhaps its because of the innocence of those times....
There have been many moments in my life that have come close to the same level, but somehow that moment sticks in my head as being the happiest... Again i attribute it to probably the simplicity of the mind then. Looking at things though a child's eyes.
I was brought up simple. I was brought up knowing that my family couldn't afford many things that other families could. In some subconscious way, throughout my life, when i wanted to buy something for myself, i would always take it out of my own pocket, even though it left me with almost no money, and i wouldn't ask my parents for more until they found out and i got scolded for it... Even up till now, i usually try to avoid asking my parents for cash, unless i need it...
Back then, an ice cream when we went out was a big thing for me....
I wonder what happened to that innocence....
There was a time when i believe we all found joy in the simple things....
I wonder when it happens, when we start wanting more, and expecting more...
When do we lose that innocence?
There's something in a babies smile that will make you smile too....
Think about it... when you see and hear a baby laugh and smile when he/she's playing, minding its own thing... I just brings a smile to you.... The look in the baby's eye, the wonder when it see's someone new, or something new.... If you don't know what i'm talking about, look into a baby's face and eyes when his/her parents are pushing the pram or carrying him through orchard rd...
Why do i smile when i see it? i think i know why, for myself...
It brings to mind an innocence lost, and though the childs eyes, i get to relive a small moment of it. Perhaps that's why we all smile.... besides appreciating, the whole adorableness of the situation....
It could be different for you. i'm just assuming....
Maybe the key to it all is in the children.....
The key to love, the key to happiness.....
Is a child truly capable of hate?
Hate on an unforgivable scale?
Can a young child hate a person?
I honestly don't think so....
There is so much love and forgiveness inside a child, its astouding.....
And there is so much more in a special needs child....
I share a sentiment with my GF, Ada,
Special needs children were put on this earth to teach us how to love, on a much larger degree than normal children.
But truly, i believe children teach us and show us everyday how to love.....
They are the true teachers.... They really are the most important teachers we will have in our lives.
I hope and pray i learn from them....
I hope and pray i learn before i become too cynical....
i hope and pray the world learns before it becomes too cynical....
Sunday, October 15, 2006
Monday, October 02, 2006
Free - Corrinne May
I see the morning glory
It winds upon the tree
It tells the untold story of how things were meant to be
You saw the universe
Caught up in desperate dreams
You came and changed the ending
Changed it to save my fate
You led the revolution
You left your legacy
Embraced the struggle in the face of mortality
I know I'm not alone in this
Help me believe
I can be free
I can be free from this place
Beautiful healer
Beautiful grace
Help me to see
Everything fall into place
Wake me from dreaming
No more deceiving
Break these chains
It's still the same old story
This great divide
Between the want and waste
And all the hunger inside
I heard the news today
Now I'm trying to find my place
I'm just a single voice
What can I do to erase
All this misunderstanding
All this anarchy
Six degrees of separation
Sometimes it's so hard to see
That we are not alone in this
I need to believe
I can be free
I can be free from this place
Beautiful healer
Beautiful grace
Help me to see
Everything fall into place
Wake me from dreaming
No more deceiving
Break these chains
Amazing how music can be such an inspiration......
I was on a train home from work today, and there was this boy, abt 5 yrs old i think, running around, squeezing in between ppl, all in the tight confines of a crowded MRT train.
At the time i couldn't help myself but think about how annoying the kid was, and his parents weren't doing anything to stop him, even though he was clearly annoying the other passengers around him... So that was my thought all the way from Orchard MRT to Bishan MRT.
But as i was walking home from the MRT, this song came on. It set me off thinking....
I listened closer to the lyrics, tried to get the meaning of the song. It set me off to thinking even deeper....
I thought about my previous posts, about how children see things in truth, how they are still innocent enough to speak the truth through their eyes. Then i thought back to the kid on the train, and suddenly from annoyance, i thought to myself, if only we were so lucky.
If we were as lucky to be as the boy on the train, free from worries and the burdens of this grown up world. To not bother about how the people around think of him, to have no thought of his own image and he does what he wants, when he wants.
Is it so? That as we get older, society chains us up, so that we aren't able to be who we truly are and who we truly want to be? That this current state of being is brought about by all the burdens and chains of society? Could it be that society is in fact shutting the truth of the individual from itself?
Recently my company had a breakfast meeting and we all had to dress up into certain themes.
The theme i got was Punk Chic. After scrounging around for accesories and clothes to try to look as punk as i could, we went to the store early in the morning to dress up. A friend helped me with my hair, it was spiked up and twisted together to look sharp and i had many of these little spikes all over my head. pretty much like a durian i guess, i had another friend do eyeliner for me as well... there after we left the shop to head to Cineleisure, where the meeting was held. Strange how it is, we noticed a lot of people staring at us, probably wondering who all these mad people were, dressed such as us early in the morning. But it didn't hit me till i headed home.
Caught a cab and dropped off at my place. Immediately, when i got out of the cab, these 2 people sitting at the drop off point literally stopped talking and turned to stare... Rude i know, but at the same time, it made me wonder about the acceptance of individuals....
Now, i look at those who dress in any way they want, with a lot of respect. The amount of courage neccessary to do that. The amazing sense of self to not be affected by what the world thinks of them. As much as i try to have that same sense of self, many a time i just can't help but feel watched, judged and sentenced, as though before a judge in a court of law.
There are so many things that as kids, we grew up knowing, that we grew up doing, yet it seems that as we grow up and become more steeped into society, we lose that individuality, we lose that freedom to be who we are, just so that we would fit into what the trends demand, what society demands and what the world demands of us...
Perhaps to some, it would be considered folly, to go back to our childish ways, but i'm saying that we go back to that completely, but by using our hindsight, we learn from the kids around us. We need to learn and see through their eyes once again. To combine that with the wisdom and experience we all have learned through our lives. To not be afraid of being ourselves, even if who we are is completely away from society's norm. To not be afraid to speak our minds, yet combining that with our wisdom and experience so as we would not hurt those around us with our words.
If i could turn back time, and tell myself to never forget certain things, i would.
Its time i relearned certain lessons, and its time i unlearned certain things.
Its time i broke these chains of society and tried to make things the way they were meant to be.
Jesus couldn't have died just for this to happen...
He couldn't have died to save us, just for us to end up losing ourselves.
I know deep within my heart that The Kingdom isn't this way....
I as a catholic am charged with the mission to try to build God's Kingdom on earth.
This can't be part of it, this society and it common laws....
God, help us break these chains that bind us.
Jesus, help us find ourselves once again.
Spirit, guide us and bring us back to the right path.
This song is my prayer, that what i want to affect in this world is not in vain.
It is my prayer that i hope i am on the right track.
That i am not alone in my struggle to change the world
That what i believe in is the truth.
I pray this so i have hope, so i CAN believe....
It winds upon the tree
It tells the untold story of how things were meant to be
You saw the universe
Caught up in desperate dreams
You came and changed the ending
Changed it to save my fate
You led the revolution
You left your legacy
Embraced the struggle in the face of mortality
I know I'm not alone in this
Help me believe
I can be free
I can be free from this place
Beautiful healer
Beautiful grace
Help me to see
Everything fall into place
Wake me from dreaming
No more deceiving
Break these chains
It's still the same old story
This great divide
Between the want and waste
And all the hunger inside
I heard the news today
Now I'm trying to find my place
I'm just a single voice
What can I do to erase
All this misunderstanding
All this anarchy
Six degrees of separation
Sometimes it's so hard to see
That we are not alone in this
I need to believe
I can be free
I can be free from this place
Beautiful healer
Beautiful grace
Help me to see
Everything fall into place
Wake me from dreaming
No more deceiving
Break these chains
Amazing how music can be such an inspiration......
I was on a train home from work today, and there was this boy, abt 5 yrs old i think, running around, squeezing in between ppl, all in the tight confines of a crowded MRT train.
At the time i couldn't help myself but think about how annoying the kid was, and his parents weren't doing anything to stop him, even though he was clearly annoying the other passengers around him... So that was my thought all the way from Orchard MRT to Bishan MRT.
But as i was walking home from the MRT, this song came on. It set me off thinking....
I listened closer to the lyrics, tried to get the meaning of the song. It set me off to thinking even deeper....
I thought about my previous posts, about how children see things in truth, how they are still innocent enough to speak the truth through their eyes. Then i thought back to the kid on the train, and suddenly from annoyance, i thought to myself, if only we were so lucky.
If we were as lucky to be as the boy on the train, free from worries and the burdens of this grown up world. To not bother about how the people around think of him, to have no thought of his own image and he does what he wants, when he wants.
Is it so? That as we get older, society chains us up, so that we aren't able to be who we truly are and who we truly want to be? That this current state of being is brought about by all the burdens and chains of society? Could it be that society is in fact shutting the truth of the individual from itself?
Recently my company had a breakfast meeting and we all had to dress up into certain themes.
The theme i got was Punk Chic. After scrounging around for accesories and clothes to try to look as punk as i could, we went to the store early in the morning to dress up. A friend helped me with my hair, it was spiked up and twisted together to look sharp and i had many of these little spikes all over my head. pretty much like a durian i guess, i had another friend do eyeliner for me as well... there after we left the shop to head to Cineleisure, where the meeting was held. Strange how it is, we noticed a lot of people staring at us, probably wondering who all these mad people were, dressed such as us early in the morning. But it didn't hit me till i headed home.
Caught a cab and dropped off at my place. Immediately, when i got out of the cab, these 2 people sitting at the drop off point literally stopped talking and turned to stare... Rude i know, but at the same time, it made me wonder about the acceptance of individuals....
Now, i look at those who dress in any way they want, with a lot of respect. The amount of courage neccessary to do that. The amazing sense of self to not be affected by what the world thinks of them. As much as i try to have that same sense of self, many a time i just can't help but feel watched, judged and sentenced, as though before a judge in a court of law.
There are so many things that as kids, we grew up knowing, that we grew up doing, yet it seems that as we grow up and become more steeped into society, we lose that individuality, we lose that freedom to be who we are, just so that we would fit into what the trends demand, what society demands and what the world demands of us...
Perhaps to some, it would be considered folly, to go back to our childish ways, but i'm saying that we go back to that completely, but by using our hindsight, we learn from the kids around us. We need to learn and see through their eyes once again. To combine that with the wisdom and experience we all have learned through our lives. To not be afraid of being ourselves, even if who we are is completely away from society's norm. To not be afraid to speak our minds, yet combining that with our wisdom and experience so as we would not hurt those around us with our words.
If i could turn back time, and tell myself to never forget certain things, i would.
Its time i relearned certain lessons, and its time i unlearned certain things.
Its time i broke these chains of society and tried to make things the way they were meant to be.
Jesus couldn't have died just for this to happen...
He couldn't have died to save us, just for us to end up losing ourselves.
I know deep within my heart that The Kingdom isn't this way....
I as a catholic am charged with the mission to try to build God's Kingdom on earth.
This can't be part of it, this society and it common laws....
God, help us break these chains that bind us.
Jesus, help us find ourselves once again.
Spirit, guide us and bring us back to the right path.
This song is my prayer, that what i want to affect in this world is not in vain.
It is my prayer that i hope i am on the right track.
That i am not alone in my struggle to change the world
That what i believe in is the truth.
I pray this so i have hope, so i CAN believe....
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