Quin says I have to share this. I'm a little reluctant about showing my evil side, but here goes.
Tayler was my main man before he left, for disposing of trapped, deceased mice. We had this hole under the kitchen sink cupboard that mice would step out of and onto a trap---frequently, but they rarely went anywhere else. We had a system down, and thought we had the problem under control. This is part of a letter I sent to Tayler:
Here's a story you'll appreciate.
Chapter 1--The day Dad and Collin left [for the High Adventure], I said to Anna "ooh, I hope we don't catch any mice while the men are gone" (we had caught 2 in the last week or so). So the next day, I heard this noise in the kitchen. I ignored it!!! When I came back, still a funny noise from under the kitchen sink. I stood next to the cupboard for a minute or two, then got up my nerve to look inside. I slowly opened the door and to my horror out fell a mouse with it's foot stuck in the trap! I ran across the room screaming, while the mouse limped along the kitchen carpet trying to distance itself from the maniac monster it found itself positioned in front of. After several moments I said to Anna "what would a rational, mature woman do in a situation like this?" I didn't want to think of what that would be, so I scooped the mouse into a cottage cheese container, and at arms length took it outside and dropped it out. Unfortunately the fall didn't kill it. Part of me was saying, "what a poor thing," and the other part was saying "you AREN'T going to touch a wiggling mouse" Well, the rest of the story isn't pretty. Maui picked it up a few times and threw it around, Moochie looked at it and walked away disinterested. Both abandoned me in my time of need, leaving me feeling guilty for traumatizing the little creature with big ferocious predators. So, I decided the merciful thing to do was to drown it. Anna of course was offering suggestions, but no offers of picking up the mouse. Well, drowning was a bad idea, because the trap floated, and the mouse swam around, and I realized I really couldn't stomach the thought of holding it under. About that time Maui asserted that the mouse in the bucket wasn't working. She popped it right out, and began her antics again. I thought, "I am an animal torturer, this is wrong, I've got to kill it!" So, I picked up the push broom and slammed it on the ground for a few practice blows, which Maui seemed to understand well. She then, mercifully for me, took the mouse and the trap over to the privacy of the ivy, and pulled it off the trap and _________I don't know what. Maybe she ate it, or left it to die with dignity. A few hours later Anna recovered the trap, which I had her promptly retire to the trash can.
Chapter 2--Dad came home 2 days later. I opened the cupboard door, and behold, a DEAD mouse in the trap. Upon further investigation, I found mouse tracks through 3 banks of drawers, not to mention the cupboard. Needless to say, I was NOT happy. So, Dad and I went to Home Depot and bought 3 cans of insulation foam. I cleaned everything, and he filled in every crack, crevice and cranny. Next morning the cracks were bulging, even dripping with foam.
I defy any mouse to come into my house ever again!
April 2011
