seeking perfection...

With the certificates all stamped and signed, bludging through a ceremony with an unusually surly mace-bearing university official (likely missing MasterChef), it doesn't get anymore official than that. Huzzah for having endured another Paper-and-Flat-Hat day.

That noted, it's a pretty pathetic job market, or perhaps just sheer sloth on my part, that given how "desirable" my qualifications are supposed to be, not having been handed many "maybes", let alone "yeses" is rather telling. I guess it might just be the economy catching up with the headless-chicken frenzy that was characteristic of the rest of the world for the past three or so years. All still very frustrating with those "maybes" being left at that.

The idea of just dropping the conventional and seeking my own type of perfection has come up, but I'm not exactly a paragon of impulse these days. The insecurity of having no income stream and the obstinacy of refusing to seek help from kith, kin or the government is putting a severe strain on the creative juice bar, and THEIR prices are going up, too.

Even the simple pursuit of a flat mid-section, let alone rippling washboard abs, is increasingly daunting the more progress I make. Beefy I have down pat. Ripped is a more accurate description of my jeans than my body. And drugs to solve that are somewhat out of reach given the financial flow I've outlined above.

And when they say your career is down the crapper, your personal life could not be happier; sort of an inverse relationship. Since I have got no job, I would expect personal relationships and everything to be orgasmically euphoric. However, it's a veritable sea of non-committment a certain party, which, while pleasant, is abysmally frustrating at best. Turns out the opposite of null is mediocrity.

So as a quick checklist to myself, as few are interested and fewer still bother to read:

- got the bloody degrees
- got no bloody job
- got no bloody abs
- got a "we-ain't-in-Kansas-no-more" middle of nowhere type personal thing going, if it were moving

A quarter of a way to nowhere. Not a promising start to a non-existent neither here nor there career of world domination. A personal non-hellish type of Gehenna, perfect in the most imperfect way.