Things You’d Love to Say at Work!
1. And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be………..?
2. Do I look like a people person?
3. This isn’t an office. It’s Hell with fluorescent lighting!
4. I started out with nothing and still have most of it left.
5. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
6. If I throw a stick, will you leave?
7. You!……..Off my planet.
8. Does your train of thought have a caboose?
9. Did the aliens forget to remove your anal probe?
10. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
11. A PBS mind in an MTV world.
12. Allow me to introduce my selves.
13. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.
14. I’m trying to imagine you with a personality.
15. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
16. Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven’t fallen asleep yet.
17. Can I trade this job for what’s behind door #1?
18. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
19. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
20. Chaos, Panic, and Disorder ... My work here is done.
21. How do I set a laser printer to stun?
22. I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.
23.Sometimes,when you cry,no one sees your tears.
Sometimes,when you are worried,no one sees your pain.
Sometimes ,when you are happy,no one sees your smile.
But fart just one time…(I bet Sawee laughs her knickers off**)
More crude jokes:
Q. How do you know when you are getting old?
A. When you start having dry dreams and wet farts.
Q. What’s the definition of a Yankee?
A. Same thing as a ‘’quickie'’, only you do it yourself.
Q. Why don’t little girls fart?
A. Because they don’t get assholes until they’re married
Q. What do you call a chiniese phedophile?
A. Fuk em young.
Q. Why do women have 2% more brains then a cow?
A. So, when you pull their tits they won’t shit on the floor.
Q. Why can’t women read maps?
A. Because only the male mind can comprehend the concept of 1 inch equals a mile.(WTF)
Q. What has one hundred balls and screws old ladies?
A.Bingo!
Q. How do you get four old ladies to shout “Fuck”?
A. Get a fifth old lady to shout “Bingo
Q. Why haven’t they sent a woman to the moon yet?
A. It doesn’t need cleaning.
Q. How do men sort out their laundry?
A. Filthy, and filthy but wearable.
Need a good laugh to end the miserable day? I do.
Out`
Sawee blooms here
Loving someone requires honesty
So if you aint honest do you still love the person?
wtf is love anyway?
It's kinda upsetting to know that someone whom once liked you is hooking up with someone you know.
Not that I like that person or something but it just feels weird though.
Nevertheless,if you're happy I will be happy for you :)
The Holiday makes me wanna spring into the scenes, enjoy the freezing cold snowy weather and the laid back country side ambience.Absolutely Perfect.Nice place to emo
Sad to say that,honestly,I'm a lil disappointed with Mr Allan wu(Joel).
Not to mention,he is Jeanne's new boyfriend.
Sigh~
For some reason you know its coming right at you but dont know what to do.
I dont wish for some things to happen.
Like the song says
When we both agreed as lovers,
We were better off as friends,
That's how it had to be,Yeah, that's how it had to be.
So I beg of you to give me an easier way out?
A song I got from Vera's blog.Sad indeed.EMO-ing
Sunday is gloomy, my hours are slumberless.
Dearest, the shadows I live with are numberless.
Little white flowers will never awaken you,
Not where the black coach of sorrow has taken you.
angels have no thought of ever returning you
Would they be angry if I thought of joining you?
Gloomy sunday
Gloomy Sunday, with shadows I spend it all;
My heart and I have decided to end it all.
Soon there'll be candles and prayers that are sad, I know;
Let them not weep, let them know that I'm glad to go.
Death is no dream, for in death I'm caressing you;
With the last breath of my soul, I'll be blessing you.Dreaming -
I was only dreaming.I wake and I find you asleep in the deep of my heart, dear.
Darling, I hope that my dream never haunted you;
My heart is telling you how much I wanted you.Gloomy Sunday.
My emotions are flactuatung like the Real GDP curve with its peak and trough
Hell,I dont know what's getting in me.Really.
Sawee blooms here
Woo~
Looks like my social life is back on track; driving me with lil time for 'personal emo-ing space'
haha
I saw Partner AGAIN!
Rahh damn fated man.
This time was at the most unlikelyplaces and somewhere secluded not frequent by an eastsider like moi.Joel was with her.Aka Allan wu impostor.Some say good looking.
Hockey bbq.
Floating in the rain sheltered with a few pieces of brochures like xiao za bos from Serangoon Mrt station to Maju Ave was a perfect welcoming note.
On a positive note,
Food was palatable.
Camila got dead drunk and ended up vomitting on Max's bed.
Poor Max.
At least he had Good-Oh Elsie to help him clean up ;)
Man,its been ages since I had a good good laugh
Mr Danker was laming away though he made my day so happy.
He jab me with a motivation booster!I was elated man
You dont get comments like that every other day know :)
Hehe
**When you cant get to someone's house next time,please dial 1800-(NAME)
Sawee blooms here
Before Cinderalla returns back to her usual form and the carriage transform back into a pumkin,
once again HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my two people who are special to me :)
1)Xin Er (Date:16th Dec)
2)Kai Wen (Date:17th Dec)
Enjoy this special day of yours to the fullest!
Woo~
Had a long long day shopping with Sweetie Wing Wing!
Cakes at NYDC were so tempting we were this close to drooling at the sight of them.
Met up with a few of her friends and I saw PARTNER!
Without her braces.Still, I prefer my old Birdy beanie jeannie
She and tanessa were working under Nivea products at WATSONS.LOL
I pratically pee-ed in my pants lahh damn furnie
Didnt quite expect partner to work under the roof of WATSONS.Naahha
Pardon me.
Hols are just Shiokadoodoodles
Sleep shop study play swim jog chill friends at your own pace**
Gonna cherish every minute of it Babes ;)
The things we do for our loved ones
white lies,sacrificial giving,waiting patiently for the other to reciprocate,tolerance...
I wish there is a you I can sing about, dream about, fill my empty heart
but I'm not ready nor is there a you yet.
Christmas alone? Maybe.
Sawee blooms here

Tempti-licioussssssss
Want a bite?Or just a lick?
Christmas season is round the jinglebell corner so make some mouth watering desserts for your loved ones!
Chocolate and Vietnamese Coffee Tart, Condensed Milk Ice Cream
Ingredients
Condensed milk ice cream:
6 large egg yolks
2 cups whole milk,
divided1/2 teaspoon salt 1 (15-ounce) can sweetenedcondensed milk
Chocolate tart dough:
1/4 cup slivered almonds 1 cup confectioners’ sugar,
divided 1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter
1/4 cup cocoa powder
1/4 teaspoon salt1/3 cups
all-purpose flour2 large eggs
Chocolate-coffee ganache filling:
17 ounces bittersweet chocolate (66% cocoa mass), finely chopped 1/2 cup coarsely ground French roast coffee*
2 cups heavy cream
1/3 cup sweetened condensed milk
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 large eggs, lightly beaten

Preparation
1. Make condensed milk ice cream:
Place egg yolks in a large bowl and set aside.
Fill a large bowl 1/3-full with ice water and set aside.
In a medium saucepan over medium heat, heat 1 cup of milk to scalding.
Pour 1/3 hot milk over yolks, whisking constantly until well combined.
Pour in remaining hot milk, then pour mixture back into saucepan and return to low heat.
Stir constantly until mixture has thickened enough to coat back of wooden spoon.
Remove from heat and stir in remaining 1 cup milk, salt and condensed milk. Place bowl in ice bath (be careful not to spill water into ice cream base) for about 10 minutes, until mixture is cool.
Place in a covered plastic container and refrigerate until mixture is cold, about 2 hours. Freeze in an ice cream machine.
2. Make chocolate tart dough: Place almonds and 2 tablespoons confectioners’ sugar in food processor fitted with metal chopping blade.
Pulse until almonds are very finely ground. In bowl of electric mixer fitted with paddle attachment, cream butter, cocoa powder, ground almonds and salt on medium speed until well-combined.
Turn mixer to low and add remaining confectioners’ sugar and flour and mix well. Slowly add eggs and mix until thoroughly incorporated. Shape dough into a ball and flatten into a disc. Wrap well with plastic wrap and refrigerate overnight.
3. Position rack to center of oven and preheat oven to 350°F.
4. Using a rolling pin, roll dough between two sheets of lightly floured parchment or waxed paper until it is about 1/8" thick and 13" in diameter.
Transfer dough to tart pan, pressing against edges.
Roll pin over top to remove excess dough.
Place a large sheet of parchment on top of dough and fill with dried beans or pie weights.
Bake for 20 minutes, remove paper and beans and continue to bake for another 20 minutes until dry. Remove from oven and place on wire rack to cool. Leave oven on.
5. Make chocolate-coffee ganache filling: Place chopped chocolate in a medium bowl and set aside. In a medium saucepan, combine coffee, cream, condensed milk and salt to a simmer, whisking constantly.
Strain mixture though a fine-mesh sieve on top of chopped chocolate. Stir until chocolate is melted and smooth, then whisk in eggs until smooth and shiny.
Pour into baked tart shell and place tart on baking sheet. Bake for 25-30 minutes, or until filling is just slightly jiggly in the center. Place tart on wire rack and cool completely.
6. Assemble dessert: To serve, slice tart into 10 slices, and place on plate with a scoop of Condensed Milk Ice Cream.
D
ont blame me.I just copied and paste the facts.Hell it is lengthty!
Sawee blooms here
Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is a behavioral condition that can make it difficult for children to concentrate and follow directions.Correction.
Not only subjected to children.Adults can suffer from ADHD too.
I highly suspect SaWee is suffering from that :P
I must be mad surfing the net at wee hours on pain management and all the mental disorder whatever nots.
Tell me I'm normal.
RED ALERT to all those ladehhs who are uber mojo fans of High heels
Unlike the Barbie dolls they grew up playing with, women have flatter feet designed to bear their weight by distributing it evenly across the entire surface.
By placing feet in an uncomfortable position, high heels may lead to a slew of health problems.
Pain in the ball of the foot, metatarsalgia, is a common compliant for high heel enthusiasts.
But the damage done by heels goes beyond aching feet. High-heeled shoes change the shape of the feet and may eventually prevent them from functioning properly.
The unnatural position that the feet and legs are placed in when wearing high heels may shorten the Achilles tendon, which connects the calf muscle to the heel bone.
This causes the tendon to become inflamed and irritated.
Frequent high heel wearers may also develop a bump at the back of their heel, commonly called a “pump bump,” caused by friction between the heel bone and the back of the shoe.
Pantyhose may also cause health problems.
Stockings prevent air from circulating around the foot and create the perfect damp, warm environment for the growth of fungi such as athlete’s foot.
The abrasiveness of nylon,
which is compounded when the pantyhose is wet or sweaty, can cause blisters.
Some varieties of pantyhose, usually the cheaper ones,
don’t have adequate elasticity,
which may cause the toes to be constricted and forced upwards leading to ingrown nails and hammertoes.
Sawee blooms here
4 Excuses to Eat Chocolate :)))
Drink Chocolate Milk
1. It was shown that high levels of milk chocolate consumption do not raise blood cholesterol levels, even though chocolate is high in saturated fats. It seems that the saturated fat in chocolate, stearic acid, does not have the same effect on cholesterol levels as other types of saturated fats. Woo~ Cool seh Anyway,for people who do not know that we cannot consume more than 200mg of saturated fats a day.Okay I cant find the actual amount.This is the rough figure.Ha.
Eat Chocolate Bars
2. Chocolate is loaded with antioxidant polyphenols. These are those same compounds found in red wine, fruits and vegetables that are touted for their heart-healthy and other disease-preventing qualities. In fact, a regular chocolate bar contained as much as an eight-ounce glass of red wine, or the same amount as five servings of fruits and vegetables. Cocoa contained the most, followed by dark chocolate and then milk chocolate. What is still not known is whether the polyphenols in chocolate can be absorbed by the body. Those studies are still preliminary and ongoing. Early results in animal studies are looking positive. This could be one science experiment where it may be fun to be the guinea pig.
Chocolate Is Better for Your Teeth
3. Chocolate is better for your teeth that other foods with a similar sugar content. Apparently the nature of chocolate makes it easily rinsed from the mouth by saliva, leaving it in contact with teeth for a shorter time. Chocolate also contains tannins, which inhibit the action of cavity causing bacteria, perhaps by not allowing them to stick to the teeth.
Chocolate Is a Natural Drug
4. Although you would have to eat several pounds at one sitting, chocolate has been found to contain chemical compounds that stimulate the same receptor sites in the brain as marijuana.
Sawee blooms here
You are a million miles away
I dont even know who you are
Come find me one day
Christmas is season for get togethers,confession to your love ones,present giving etc.
Perhaps,in my case,I want to spend christmas alone.Am not a loser OKAY.
Get that right.
This feeling in me has been there for quite some time alrd.
I dont know how long I can take this.
If I continue with this,i'm gonna lose my friends eventually.All of them.
But I wish to be alone,really.Like shut myself up in an isolated container,
hybernate through the fall,back afresh awaiting spring.
I need to bubblewrap my heart.My everything.
I dont know what I really want
Someone please help me find my way~
If your friend was vomitting incessantly for the past half an hour,what would you do?
a) Call an ambulance
b) Rush the nurse;asking her to cut the queue because HELLO this is an emergency!
c) Ask the nurse frequently whether it's her turn or not
OR
d)All of the above
Gawd,I dont understand where are those brains people have from studying.
Study so much but when comes to real life situation like this,cant think of a reasonable solution also damn jia lat sia
I'd done all of the above.
Comeon, we are talking about a person's life at stake.
And I suspect that it could be serious food poisoning if not she wouldnt be vomitting for an hour and a half.Wahhh siao.
That girl must be exhausted.Yiewww gross
So,Please people.
God created brains for us to use WISELY, not only to study.Dumbasses(her friends).
Lights out`
Sawee blooms here