Confection Concessionaire Prospers in Stabilised AlterCosm

After many years in service with the Omniplex Centre, Mr Burr left in search of something a bit more fulfilling. He established a foothold in Dementia VII with paghpaghak dispensaries that often fell under fractal storm activity causing disjointed unioning with competitive entities. But through perseverance, vision, and a stabilisation of local space-time, Mr Burr’s Dairy Interludes eventually re-established its superposition of Gestalt Ascendant.
  Mere mortals continue to stand in awe observing the tenacious passion of Mr Burr and how he thoughtfully tailors each input-instance that goes into bespoken constructs.

“I felt like something was missing in Dementia III: a prescriptionary that meets the demand for paghpaghak within orthoplexic contingencies independent of others’ co-domains. Thus, with a heart to support local plastic gladiators, spirit squads, and technicot clenches, I took that passion and confected a dairy interlude that caters to all logical connectives and commutative pragmatics. With every flavour iteration comes the highest-quality craftsmanship able to serve multijective functions. Come by and enjoy our product.”

Tales from the Grid — Vol. 1.3

In C-Town’s squalid eastside, the ’Nuts huddled under a stone archway in the dingy recesses of The Euc. A twerpy fellow with arm in a cast approached fervently.
  “You guys did it! You stole my coat,” the guy pointed. The group accused sat bemused and wondered what this runt was on about.
  “You see, you guys are from the South and aren’t used to our harsh winters here. Therefore, one of you stole my blue coat!”
  Provincial logic at its best.
  The ’Nuts looked at each other, imagining retorts offering to break his other arm as well as generalised ridicule, but simply sat staring at the raving man-boy.
  One of the group piped up: “I hope you at least paid cover to get in here — that way at least someone’s benefiting besides us watching your spastic and spurious strictures.”
  The twerp fumed silently before storming away.
  “Must’ve seen Light of Day a few too many times.”

Schlafwandelnde Schaufensterpuppe

Local Influencer Peddles Influence

Drive around Heritageville and you’re bound to see the strategically placed billboard: “Make Your Own History,” it says, next to an image of a semi-enthused young man.
  It seems local influencer Jared Gutts has gone the outdoor advertising route to promote his outlooks, his stances on life... his brand. The simplicity of the design makes it effective in that all you see is Jared’s face and some empty slogan, which are the only elements people have to see before rushing to blow hard-earned money on whatever he is peddling.

Mendokusai Mitōshi

Showdown on the Verge: Adios, el Capitán Salva una Azada

Stoddard was a fellow not normally susceptible to the tired tales of woe of others. But on his furlough from the insanities aboard the Reverend Resbo, he took respite at Asylum Le Rixe a short distance from the docked vessel. As it turns out, the insanities at the refuge would dwarf those aboard the rickety ship on which he had long been quartered.
  Stoddard relished the downtime to mentally rejuvenate, but with his defences down, the Sounding Board Factor was exploited by the hostess LeVira. He politely listened to her litany of grievances, many of which blamed that monster known as the Hackler. Stoddard’s blood was quick to boil at mention of any injustice, but a last vestige of his idealistic youth had him overlook any veracity to LeVira’s claims.
  So a seed was planted in his mind. And during a late evening stroll down Chanock Avenue, he witnessed a silhouette approaching from afar. The two-metre figure wore citrine eyeshields and strode with a lanky gait. As the two drew closer, each recognised the other and their pace quickened in mutual rage until they converged upon the verge.
  Fisticuffs and grappling ensued in a jumble of limbs for a total of about... seven seconds. Bright blue lights immediately bathed the area as two IRVs screeched to a halt at the verge as several coppers leapt forth to pull the men apart.
  Stoddard pointed at the Hackler, sputtering accusations of abuse he had been fed second-hand. Strangely enough, the constables seemed to believe him, confirming his suspicions that the Law in town was well acquainted with the Hackler’s notoriety. The officers gave Stoddard a ride back to Asylum Le Rixe without incident. His temper cooled and he slept well.
  After running errands the next day, Stoddard returned to the asylum. Entering the parlour, he stopped dead. Perched on the settee were LeVira and the Hackler enjoying the television together.
  Clarity can be a slap in the face, but Stoddard welcomed any bracing realisation of the truth, no matter how ugly. He quietly slipped to his quarters and made evac plans posthaste.
  The resulting fallout at Asylum Le Rixe was not pretty, but at least Stoddard was no longer around to witness the destructive aftermath.
  The town citizens were brassed off enough with the Hackler’s misdeeds, but of course the Old Bill could do nought but sit on his thumbs. Within a week, the Conviviator Eustacius and the Slaavik found the Hackler, gently took him aside, held a revolver to his jaw and issued the classic ultimatum: “Be outta Dodge by dusk.”

Glaberrex, l’Amaro

Emoto-Triptych: Gibun Byeonhwa

Narrengold and Jared Gutts: A Dynamic Partnership Celebrating ‘Living on the Edge’

Narrengold Industries and influencer Jared Gutts have announced a long-term strategic partnership to celebrate creative innovation and culture.
  This summer, Narrengold launched the Jared Gutts Challenge that raises awareness through social media channels and repositions Narrengold as a culture-shaping organization dedicated to pushing boundaries.
  Jared Gutts has collaborated closely with Narrengold on a sound strategy: specialised marketing approaches focusing on behavioural targeting via outlandish stunts. Gutts was able to give Narrengold a complete understanding of their demographic’s lifestyle preferences at every touchpoint, focusing on youth themes such as extreme events and lifestyles like stuntwork and attention seeking.
  “It’s no secret that crazy dares and stunts can be very powerful tools for a brand to connect emotionally with customers, but it’s only by understanding an audience’s attention span that this can be done effectively,” explained marketing intern Meghan Cruzak.

  Though the Internet has determined the top Social Media Thought Leader and Influencer of the last decade to be none other than Jared Gutts (according to Narrengold Media Analytics), his growing presence does not come without controversy. Several years back Mr Gutts was involved in a biohazard accident in Heritageville that required a massive cleanup by the Orville Corporation, which damaged relations between Jared Gutts and his uncle Johnny Gutts, CEO of Orville.
  “Orville’s loss is our gain,” says Cruzak.

  Through his ongoing collaboration with Narrengold, Gutts is confidently engaging their youthful customers, drawing their attention with impactful publicity stunts designed to foster peer pressure and create a bandwagon effect. Some recent highlights of the Jared Gutts Challenge are the Train Jump, Croc Pit, and Lava Bath. All stunts have been somewhat dangerous, but the upside is that Gutts has been nominated five times for a Darwin Award (in the Honourable Mention category, alas, since he survived each stunt).

  In a time when social media is capturing the minds of youth, Jared Gutts has been given a chance to show off his own skillz while inviting everyone along. Whether it’s idiotic stunts or get-rich-quick schemes, he has delivered. And as the world’s greatest influencer takes centre stage, fans will take their share of the spotlight as well.
  “I’m passionate about making a difference and raising awareness,” says Gutts. “So let’s defy norms, embrace the foolhardy, and change the world together! Are you in?”

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