7 Quick Takes Friday (Vol. 98)

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Hope in the Lord! There are many times that I’m acutely aware that I'm not who anyone wants me to be, but I have a glimmer of hope because God loves me even when all those around me serve only to remind me of how much of a disappointment I am to them for a myriad of reasons. I do offer that pain up to the Lord on behalf of all who feel utterly rejected and do not know or believe in the love of God for every single one of His beloved children. 

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Beautiful in God’s Eyes Because I’m someone who tends to see myself in a very critical light, it can be really painful for me when others (especially those closest to me whose opinions’ I’m more likely to take to heart) convey a steady stream of reasons that I’m not who they want me to be, that what I say, do, how I

look, feel, my values…are wrong, ugly, stupid, delusional, quaint, ill-informed, ridiculous...  It’s not always easy for me to separate objectively what criticisms are just and accurate and which are more indicative of the insecurities or misconceptions of the other person rather than true assessments of who I am and what I’ve done, especially when judgments are being thrown at me fast and furious. 

     My tendency is to believe the bad since that’s what predominantly goes through my own thoughts about myself.  Fortunately, there is a source Truth that never lies.  So as scary as it seems when steeped in disparaging lies, I turn to God and ask how He sees me when I want the Truth.  Do you have the courage to ask: “God, how do You see me?” And, more importantly, are you willing to listen in silence and believe what He tells you?

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Spring Dance Festival I was often fondly reminded of my Hollins friends and dancers (from when I was in college way back when) during this past weekend while visiting my youngest sister at OSU. The dance Road Trip & Spring Dance Festival.

performances were great! I enjoyed getting to see my sister dance, meeting her apartment mates—all three of whom are gorgeous women and fun to spend time with like my sister is.  We ate at some of her fave restaurants and dessert places.  To read more about our visit, check out

     I got back from Ohio with Mom on Monday evening. It's been wonderful to spend time with Kevin, who knows me well and loves me lots. It's also nice to be home and be back together sleeping in our own bed.  To which Kevin says: “Yeah buddy!”

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Body Image Spending time around beautiful women who are in really great shape, always wearing fashionable clothes, make-up and jewelry can be intimidating and discouraging for me at times.  I’m no longer able to fit into the single digit sizes I wore in my twenties nor have I have really been in tip-top physical condition at any point.  (My approach to appearance most of the time these days is probably best summed up in my post Fashion Faux Pas.) Seeing and hearing other women criticizing their bodies is very difficult for me, though, because it is far easier for me to see the genuine beauty in other people than it is to see it in myself.  The grace and trouble about that is no matter what I say or think, it’s unlikely to affect on the deepest levels how someone else sees or feels about herself.  If you’re not quite ready or willing to ask how God sees you, at least watch this video clip to see how it is that women usually view themselves.     

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Undeniably Adorable! There are numerous times during the day when Vivi will say that she’s beautiful or that her lips or fingers…are beautiful.  I always confirm that fact and say to her: “You are beautiful!”  Silently, I pray that she will hold onto that truth for many years to come.  I hope that’s the statement she will always return to when she looks in the mirror and stares back at her reflection.  Who do you recognize in your own family as undeniably adorable, beautiful, gorgeous?  Have you told them recently?  How about ever?  How about now?   

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Best Books on True Beauty Here are some of the most amazing books (and their authors) I’ve read in recent years that deal with the topics of beauty, body image, seeing ourselves in God’s image.

Man and Woman He Created Them: A Theology of the Body by Pope John Paul II

Fierce Beauty by Kim Meeder

Weightless: Making Peace with Your Body by Kate Wicker

Wrapped Up: God’s Ten Gifts for Women by Teresa Tomeo and Cheryl Dickow

Extreme Makeover by Teresa Tomeo

Becoming the Woman God Made You to Be by Tammy Evevard

  
     

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Comfort for the Heartbroken This week I have been and will continue praying for all who are mourning the loss of loved ones, that they may feel the hope of the Lord, allow His love to wash over them, and move in and through them as they grieve and hang on while God, in His time and in His way, turns their tears into dancing, their profound sorrow into a lasting joy.

                  

Check out Jen Fulwiler’s tradition of 7 Quick Takes Friday at her tremendously popular blog Conversion Diary,  This week we’re meeting up over at Camp Patton since Jen and their newborn baby are just getting home and settled in.  

Style, Sex, & Substance: 10 Catholic Women Consider the Things that Really Matter

I’ve been hearing great things about Style, Sex, & Substance and was overjoyed when my copy of the book finally arrived.  It’s even better than I’d hoped for, and I was already expecting to be impressed by the contributors included. 

     
The wonderfully unique personalities and voices of these ten women discussing their experiences of life, love, friendship, marriage, faith, discernment, womanhood, family life, and God are refreshing, enriching, and unabashedly honest. 
     
Personal stories, excellent suggestions, and reflection questions drew me into the book, engaging me on a much deeper level than I imagined on the most essential aspects of the lives of modern Catholic women.
     
These ten writers show the many ways in which Catholic women can and do live out their feminine genius as intellectuals, entrepreneurs, wives, mothers, domestic divas, prayer warriors, and friends.  If you’re in the habit of reading the National Catholic Register, Catholic Digest,  and/or keep up with popular Catholic blogs, then you’ll likely recognize some of these spectacular women. 
     
I found myself soaking up words of wisdom and humor in each chapter.  I came across some writers I’m not as familiar with whose books I definitely plan to check out now that I’ve gotten a glimpse of who they are and how they write.      
     
As someone who loves children and has served as the “other mother” for many kids over the years as teacher, nanny, tutor, babysitter, camp instructor…I can really identify with what Simcha Fisher has to say about women’s vocation: “That is the job that women have, whether we have given birth or not: to be a mother to the whole world.  God knows the whole world needs us.” (p. 137) 
     
Chances are very good that you’ll find yourself described somewhere in these pages and will be inspired and challenged in creative ways to become all that God intends you to be.  This isn’t a recipe book for perfection, but more a guidebook for those who have embraced the call to holiness in the midst of their daily lives.  One suggestion by Karen Edmisten can be used by every one of us: “Whether you’re single, married, or discerning a call to religious life, deliriously happy or a confused mess, offer it up to God.  Give him every moment.” (p. 44)
     
You’ll definitely be glad you read Style, Sex, & Substance, and like me, you’ll likely think of a number of friends who would also enjoy it. 
    
I wrote this review of Style, Sex and Substance for the free Catholic book review program, Tiber River.  I receive free product samples as compensation for writing reviews for Tiber River.
   
This post is linked to the Catholic Bloggers Monthly Round-up.

Happy 7th Anniversary, Babe!

Happy 7^th Wedding Anniversary! Even before the “that’s not an option” sunrise there was a special bond of friendship between us.

Early on you squeezed my hand and told me, “I wish you could be the one.”

Now after all these years…you’re still the one—I got you, Babe!

From early on many people said we made a cute couple and even now, I must say that we make this marriage thing look good and fun—like a whole lot of LAUGHING TOGETHER…

From “est-ce que tu” to “I do” we’ve had many ups and downs, and a whole lot of surprises, we’ve made some good friends, grown a lot whether in times of feast or famine, we kept standing for what we believe in never conceiving we’d come so far.

Kevin James Potter, I love you from the bottom of my heart, and I’m glad married me!

Love, hugs, kisses, and prayers, Trisha  mch…fffffffffffffffffffff!

The following are a handful of older posts that tell a bit more about how Kevin and I first met and how God's worked in our lives over the past 13 years we've been a couple, the last seven of which we've been married.
 
We hope, some day to finish the spiritual memoir of God's work in our lives which at this point in time is called by the same name as the menu and great sum-up of our relationship: LAUGHING TOGETHER. 

“With this ring, I thee…”  

“A Theology of Marriage” Theology of the Body book
“Solitude, Loneliness, and the Void Only God Can Fill”

“Fall Asleep Counting Your Blessings”

“Six Years Ago This Weekend”
“Another Rosary Wouldn’t Mean As Much”

“Loving Your Marriage Enough to Protect It” Book

“The Seven Levels of Intimacy” book

“Set Free to Love” book

“Have a Glorious Easter”

“Because of You”

“Happy Independence Day!”

“The True Meaning of Christian Marriage”

Weightless: Making Peace with Your Body

I first learned about popular writer and journalist, wife and mom, Kate Wicker because of her renown in the blogging world.  I was really struck by one of her posts which included a letter from a woman whose daughter was struggling with an eating disorder asking for tips on what the mother could do to help her get better.  Kate wrote back some suggestions for this mother as to how she could help her daughter.  Where does Kate Wicker get her insight into the confusing world of eating disorders, diets, weight loss, exercise, binging, purging, and calorie counting? 

     
For a number of years, Kate suffered from anorexia and bulimia.  She knows firsthand how the pursuit for skinniness can wreak havoc inside your body, mind, and soul.  In Weightless: Making Peace with Your Body, Kate shares some of the intimate details of her own struggle with body image, calorie counting, excessive exercise, binge eating, as well as describes where the desire to keep her weight down originated and what happened when she got the help she needed. 

   
This book isn’t just for women or men who have struggled with an eating disorder.  It’s for every person who has ever been less than satisfied with his/her physical appearance.  It’s for anyone who has ever wished he/she was skinnier, taller, more muscular, had a better complexion, fewer freckles, no wrinkles, darker skin, lighter hair, a smaller nose, more voluptuous lips, longer eyelashes…

     
Kate read quite a bit about eating disorders when she was recovering and she quickly discovered that most of what she read dealt with the emotional and physical symptoms of the illness and how to become healthier in those two areas, but an important element was missing.      

     
What about the spiritual suffering that is involved?  How does someone heal that aspect of their lives?  These are two of the questions which inspired Kate to pray about (and then write about) the spiritual aspects of returning to health. 

     
There are countless resources, books, magazine articles, and websites devoted to beauty, fashion, exercise, as well as those that help people to identify, address, and treat eating disorders, but Kate found there was a definite lack of resources that included Scriptural support for every person to have a healthy body image.  Kate reminds us of many passages from Scripture in which each of God’s children are precious, loved, lovable, and even beautiful.  For example, she reminds us that we are “fearfully and wonderfully made” according to Psalm 139 (which happens to be one of my favorites to return to when feeling unlovable for any reason).    

     
Kate talks about how she came to have a better body image herself, and how she encourages her daughters to see themselves as beautiful in God’s eyes.  It is only through a deeper relationship with the Lord that lasting peace and true acceptance of yourself and others is possible.  Kate came to this realization a while ago and has been inspiring others by living it and passing a healthier legacy down to her daughters.    

     
I don’t know about you, but I have an ongoing need to be reminded that I am made in the Lord’s image and always beautiful in God’s sight, because I certainly have days, sometimes even weeks or months, when that feels anything but true.  This book is a great place to start to heal, love, and be loved in mind, body, and spirit.   

     
This review was written as part of the Catholic book reviewer program from The Catholic Company. Visit The Catholic Company to find more information on Weightless - Making peace with your body. They are also a great source for a Catechism of the Catholic Church or a Catholic Bible.

Campbell's Soup, Frosted Flakes, & Sex

     With a Respect Life Grant from the Catholic Diocese of Richmond, Saint Michael the Archangel’s Respect Life Committee brought in a national speaker who describes herself as a “Frustrated Stand-Up Comedian.”
     Linda Hancock, FNP, PhD., Director, Wellness Resource Center at Virginia Commonwealth University, has been a nurse practitioner for over twenty years. In her job, she’s worked with all the "S's"- sex, substance abuse, smoking cessation, spirituality, stress, and statistics on social norms. She thinks college students are fun and fascinating.

Set Free to Love

Set Free to Love shows the powerful, life-changing effects of reading and studying John Paul II’s Theology of the Body. Through a series of stories from people of different ages, stages, vocations, and with quite varied life experiences, the reader is given some valuable insights into the teachings of the theology of the body and how they have completely changed the way many view the human body, sexuality, marriage, celibacy, and how God intends for us to glorify Him through these gifts.
    
The implications of the Biblical interpretations in Man and Woman He Created Them: A Theology of the Body by John Paul II has revolutionized the way men and women see and treat themselves and others. My primary reason for reading this book after already having read and been thoroughly impressed by the masterpiece by Pope John Paul II is that the rather long tome is easier for me to recommend than it is for others to purchase and commit to reading cover-to-cover.
    
I was right in figuring that this book would serve as a good introduction and inspiration to delve into the true source of such wisdom, insight, and revelation into God’s creation of man and woman. The true stories contained in it definitely give a sufficiently intriguing look into the teachings of the theology of the body and how they have transformed many people’s thoughts, actions, lifestyles, even their career paths to be more in line with God’s will and unconditional love.
    
Now, I have found, Set Free to Love, a well-written and thought out 84 page book to recommend as a sample that will entice those serious about Bible study, God’s view of and love for creation, and/or the teachings of the Roman Catholic Church to put the time and effort into reading and learning more about the theology of the body.
    
This review was written as part of the Catholic book reviewer program from The Catholic Company. Visit The Catholic Company to find more information on Set Free to Love. They are also a great source for serenity prayer and baptism gifts.

Mirror Images versus Made in His Image

It’s quite amusing to watch kids checking themselves out in a mirror. They smile, make funny faces, flex their muscles, and enjoy seeing how they look from different angles. The only time recently when I’ve had that sort of elated reaction when looking in a mirror has been when I’m holding a little one or when Kevin comes up behind me and makes silly faces.
    
When I look in the mirror, I’m more likely to notice the dark circles under my eyes, the blemishes on my face, the off-center slant of my nose…than I am to marvel at my appearance.
    
I was disturbed by my reflection in the full-length mirror in our hotel room. I could see all my muscles in need of toning, clear evidence in my legs that I have poor circulation and don’t exercise often enough, and was forced to face a number of flaws from head-to-toe that made me tempted to put on pants and long sleeves rather than exit our room wearing my swimsuit. One consolation is that we were several hours from home, and I’d likely never run into the people who saw me ever again.
    
Kevin found my thoughts about all of this to be unreasonable. My dear husband couldn’t understand why I became discouraged. For that, I’m grateful. If he’d been standing behind me pointing out all of the physical flaws I’m already aware of, it would have only made things worse. Fortunately, he sees me through the eyes of love. He actually likes that I’m curvier now than when we first met. My love isn’t blind. He knows I could tone up and firm up in places, yet that’s not what he sees first when he looks at me.
   
It’s rather baffling to me when other people who are very attractive aren’t happy with their looks. I wonder why they can’t see what other people see when they look at them. I also find it fascinating that other people who some would consider homely are perfectly content with their looks.
    
The only way to find the healthy place between feeling ugly and being vain is to remember that we are each made in the image of God. Regardless of what we see or think when we look in the mirror (or what others view or think when they look at us), God sees each of us as beautiful, precious, and lovable all the time. It’s even easier for Him to perceive and admire our physical likeness to Christ than it is for us to identify the resemblance between members of the same immediate family.
    
Lord, teach us how to see ourselves and others the way You see us. Remind us that Your view of us is even more beautiful than that which is seen through the eyes of a loving father, a tender mother, a gentle spouse, a long-time friend… Help us to accept Your view of us and reach out to others to show how it is You see them. Amen.

National Catholic Register

The National Catholic Register is truly a Godsend in this day and age. If you haven’t been discouraged or disillusioned by the way the mainstream media has treated the Catholic Church, our pope, the tenants of Christianity, and the people who have the audacity to fight for a culture of life in a society that espouses a culture of death, then it’s likely you’ve been completely cut off from all TV, radio, and secular print media for quite some time.
     
I have found the National Catholic Register to be a very refreshing change from the average newspaper and media outlet. Not only are the articles informative, well-written, and journalistically sound, but they are clear on the Catholic perspective on the subject matter. World news, politics, conflict, scandal, and intrigue all covered with a focus on getting the facts, promoting a culture of life, and upholding the truths held sacred by the Catholic faith make for a much better read than many of the articles I’ve come across elsewhere.
     
Now more than ever, I’ve seen how slanted and skewed things appear when attention to detail and an interest in knowing the truth are tossed aside in exchange for a more soap opera-like story that lacks most of the facts and research required to give it even the smallest bit of journalistic integrity.
     
A prime example of this is the coverage for the March for Life in mainstream media. Two approaches were generally taken by the secular journalists and newscasters: 1. they completely ignored the fact that hundreds of thousands of pro-life people came out in the cold to pray and protest for an end to abortion or 2. they wrote such skewed coverage of the event that the articles became comical to read for anyone who actually attended this year’s March for Life.
    
The responses were great to an article in which the journalist said that the one group of people missing from the March this year were young women. Cinematographers, photographers, March participants, and even those who just happened to be in D.C. that day and saw the crowds responded that the woman writing the article was grossly mistaken.
     
If you’d like to be up on current events, know all the facts about what’s happening in the Church, including the controversy and scandals as well as the liturgical changes and propagation of the Catholic Christian faith, then I’d recommend you get a subscription to National Catholic Register.  You can purchase a subscription here.

I wrote this review of National Catholic Register for the Tiber River Blogger Review program. Tiber River is the first Catholic book review site, started in 2000 to help you make informed decisions about Catholic book purchases.  I receive free product samples as compensation for writing reviews for Tiber River.

Freedom

This collection of twelve stories about how the Theology of the Body can transform lives was an amazing first taste for me of the power within Pope John Paul II’s sermons. In preparing for a Catholic Writers Conference, I read several newly-released Catholic nonfiction books, checked out a number of Catholic websites and periodicals and found that many of them mentioned something about the Theology of the Body. This piqued my curiosity, so I ordered the very large tome Man and Woman He Created Them: A Theology of the Body by Pope John Paul II. I knew I wouldn’t have enough time to read it before the conference, so I chose to read Freedom to see how this much talked about treasure could be applied to people’s lives today.
   
Through telling the stories of twelve people with very different lifestyles and circumstances, the reader is shown how Pope John Paul II’s insight into the holiness and goodness of the body can and has completely changed the thinking and behavior of men and women. What’s rather phenomenal is that the collection of sermons making up the Theology of the Body discourse as it is now commonly called were written about twenty years before they became popular to study and teach.
   
It’s likely that a wave of change will wash over a greater number of Catholics through books such as Freedom which show the benefits of learning about the Theology of the Body by showing the benefits of those who already have embraced such wisdom and applied it to their lives in a book whose length and reading level is more modern, not quite so technical and academic.
   
This book serves as a great introduction and interest-raising step into the Theology of the Body. You can purchase this book here.  I wrote this review of Freedom for the Tiber River Blogger Review program.  Tiber River is the first Catholic book review site, started in 2000 to help you make informed decisions about Catholic book purchases.  I receive free product samples as compensation for writing reviews for Tiber River.