Have you wondered why the wind
Blows cold
Did you ever realise that your face
Is painted on my soul
Out of your wings of success
The long fall from frace
Right between the eyes you bleed
Your heart you sold for stones

Falling, breaking,
my energy you're taking,
leave me alone
I'm fucking shaking,
Can't you see my heart is breaking?

Words of hate you spew at me,
all you care is no one else sees,
you bitch you rage you whine no heed,
killing my spirit and my soul it bleeds.

I don't know how more I can take of you,
while leaving me alone would be the best thing you could do,
boundaries not just crossed but barged through,
your on shaky ground and you know it's true.

How dare you criticize my ways?
And cry that it's your special day?
you had a choice,
you did it anyway,
forget my pain,
you've had your say.

All I know is I am breaking,
and there is not much time left for changing,
things will evolve or because I can't take it,
the way things are,
we'll never make it.

Im so sorry
I just need to get this off my chest
Thank you so much for caring for me
And I regret having treated you
Like that
I was a fool
I didnt know what was
Right in front of me
And it eats me from the inside
Thinking of
How you must have felt
Pouring your heart out
And I just took it
And tore it apart
I dont know how many
TimesI can say Im sorry
I know that you can never forgive me
And that’s okay
I just need you to know
That Im apologizing
And every night i sleep
I will always think of you
And my all my teardrops
Cannot erase the pain
I caused
Salty water runs down my cheeks
And onto the ground
Where I put you
I am so sorry
I am so sorry

as the dawn begins
my darkness retreats
it fears the light
can the end be near?

i always await a new day
hoping that it will be better
than the last
yet the pain still resides
deep in the trenches of my soul

my mind feels at war with itself
i am the constant casuality
i have my victories
but they seem so miniscule

sometimes the easy way out
is just an excuse
other times
a friend reminds me of why
i must exist

you
and you alone
will forge the path
leave your sorrows with the past
never believe
that the story is set
nothing is destined
or blatant
bound to this body
a world full of hatred
no one will cry
if you fall

silently we wander
through this plains
so many hopes were lost here
im trying hard to find
take another look
will we see the shape of tomorrow?

on the edge of paradise
with a stinging poison
coursing through my veins

life was just a dream
im losing my religion
trying to find my existence
it doesnt only hurt
to end this road
my funeral
beneath the dust of years
just hoping
for the fire to come alive
and free me
its getting colder
im growing older
enough is enough
theres only this much i can take
nothing left remains
all the battles
and all the tears we tasted
all the passion
and all the love we wasted
theres nothing left


and i smile
and i learn to pretend
my heart will never be open again

Dancing in the night
intoxicating beauty
Walking in the clouds
drunk with desire
Whispering words in the wind
longing for a kiss
Staring out in the darkness
hoping for completion
Finding the fire in you
stolen from desire
Time stands motionless
While worlds pass by
Shh! just kiss me


heres one for u : D

I waste hours
Of passing time
Wonder if your heart
Feels the same as mine
The love loss
The love felt
The pain delivered
From fates hand dealt

I fade away further
Into the future of emptiness
I live alive
In the blinding darkness
Knowing little
Except what was true
That nothing is purer
Than the love I felt for you

I am not alone
I know you feel me too
After all I have done
To make sure I scar you

Hearts and minds,
find the time
That in the end there was no possible reason
for anything



silent cries unheard
no one seems to understand.

im
sinking
into
depression ,
with no one to hold my hand

they slitthered in through your fingers
fate , your life in their hands
untold storms brewing
of no emotions!
when all is gone
take away the life i had
there is a place for every soul
a haven to lose control

flowers are falling
invisible lies
your stolen thoughts
begone!
silent cries
when all u sought is gone

the flame burns deep
the nature of death a mystery
your life in white is draining into this black hole
the million stars your witnesses
as life takes its leave

Its a struggle
Each failure deepening the wound
And then it all crashes down on me
Will you stay or try to leave?

Im thinking to stride past the door
But fear pins me down
Sinking in despair
I pray that it passes soon

A cruel misfortune
Forbidding is to see
When two worlds collide
Its a sad state of mind

And my hearts beats for the very last time
Still the search for peace i cannot find

Sitting on the golden jewelled sands
I watch the waves calmly breaking against the shore
Watch the birds fly in circles above the sea
I hear the melody of the sea breeze
That gently caresses my face
Its late at night and is starting to rain
But here i would remain
With the cold raindrops falling on my skin
This place fills my soul with some kind of strange energy
And I can´t explain exactly what it feels like
The shadows moves along the beach
Forming a myriad of shapes
The darkness doesn't scare me at all,
Here I feel comfortable and safe
It seems that the pain I was feeling before has gone away
I´m all alone here but somehow I dont feel lonely
Here, sitting on the golden sands ,
I will remain
Patiently contemplating the sea.

I gave you all I had
My love, my heart, my soul
Disguised as an angel
My life you stole

Everything I could have been
All that I was suppose to be
Has faded away like a dream
Now I am drowning in this reality

Truths that haunt
Fears that keep me awake
Pain that continuously stabs my heart
Hopes that I now forsake

Everyday the same
Another day without you
The one thing in my life
I believed to be true

Emptiness obsesses inside
Only darkness and misery
Waiting to die
To escape this haunting fantasy.

Alone in the far corner ,
Of a world of dreams ,
I listen to the whispers ,
Of sweet memories with wings ,
Fluttering with a soothing rhythm ,
Sliding through this cool breeze ,
We kiss , moving across everlasting time ,
Whilst somewhere far below ,
The world silently passes by,
But the day has come too soon ,
And its time for us to part,
Crying in each others arms ,
We lament over how the world has treated us ,
There are just too many wounds,
That may never heal,
But before its too late ,
I just want you to know whats real,
I love you.



i dunno what to feel anymore :sigh:

In the wake of death
I find u hiding
Behind darkness’s door
On the other side
Where it is dark and cold

Gazing into oblivion
The horizon a crimson red
Stench of withering roses
Spirals up to the night sky
Falling away into pandemonium
Driving these nightmares to life
Breathing truth into these lies

Im staring blindly
Unto a world not my own
Trying to see through this blank wall
So anxious to know finally
What has become of me

I am here,
but I am fading,
everything hurts,
and I am shaking.

Stomach in knots,
head is pounding,
dark creeps in,
slowly surrounding.

I am alive,
but I crave death,
I want to end it,
razor to flesh.

I am pathetic,
never ending,
whining bitching,
no longer pretending.

I trace my scars ,
to find some relief,
to remind myself,
of my past grief.






=/ depression is setting in