20131230
can't believe 2013 is nearly over.
this morning i got a phone call from barwon health! i was really surprised. after tae told me they were still accepting applications, i submitted mine (for the third time) on friday. was going to call them this afternoon (not really, i hate calling people so i always procrastinate) but they beat me to it. the rotations are really good too - probably similar to what i would have chosen myself. o&g, medical, psych, rehab, and nights (i think nights are compulsory for everyone).
so anyway, i have an interview on thursday. praying really hard that i get it. i would be so much less depressed if i got to work in geelong. with tae! and geelong is only 1 hr 15 mins away from clayton. after driving 2.5 hours back and forth every week this year, that is really nothing. so excited!
did pretty much nothing in the morning until the boss came to start the round at 11.30am. saw 2 patients and he kept asking us questions. not difficult ones mind you, just that i really know nothing. especially about cardiology. took a break and went for lunch, then continued with the round. thankfully the big boss came along so we didn't get questioned anymore.
had nothing to do after rounds so we did the discharge summaries for the patients going home on thurs/fri. then i had to wait for the blood results, which weren't up till like 4.40pm. -.-
went to officeworks to print templates after work. they didn't have the right kind of paper… either way it was a flop. shall try normal paper instead. i find myself quickly becoming disillusioned with how everything is packaged. this is not what i wanted…
so tired.
9:27 pm
20131229
23 days to go!
went to church this morning. we've moved to C block, meaning.. no set up and pack up! yay. went to the bettina house for a lunch of random leftovers: shin ramyun, indomie, christmas ham, corn, sausages, pizza, chocolate, and my lemon tart which was untouched from last night.
after lunch i went over to j's for a secret mission. ;p went to clayton to stock up on asian edibles since i was planning to hibernate in shep for the next few weeks. but i just found out about some expos that are happening over the next two weekends so i might still need to go back hmm.
drove back to shep from 5.30-8.10pm. along the way there was this weird car which kept speeding up and then slowing down. beside me. after i overtook them. so weird. anyway. was amazed that there had been no cat toileting accidents over the almost 2 days i'd left them alone.
tango-ed with j before he went to his best friend's house for dinner. was super amused by how he was the one talking about evening gowns and dresses. ;p he is such a kan cheong spider. totally made my day though (haven't seen him in a few days). ;p could not be more thankful. can't wait for you to be back. :)
10:42 pm
would you lie with me and just forget the world?
i am exhausted. and with exhaustion comes inertia.
woke up at 3.30am with a wheeze and couldn't fall asleep again until 5+am. then i got up at 6.30am to drive back to melbourne for brunch.
was the first one at seven:am despite being the furthest one away. karen and joab were next. got to hold asher for a bit! then mang and abalone, then ivy and the gang. had the emperor, i think their hollandaise isn't as good now.
grocery shopped at the port melbourne coles before driving home. that coles reminds me of the newly renovated coles at sunshine plaza in maroochydore. oh how i miss the sunny coast. anyway, mang and abalone were trying to get rid of their food so they followed me around coles and pretty much cut down my grocery list by 2/3.
baked melting moments and lemon tarts. the melting moments are huge but they taste pretty good and the biscuits are crumbly (as i believe they should be?). the jam is very sweet. the lemon tart pastry was too dry, think i put too much flour in. they turned out wrinkly again, i'm not sure why. overbaking?
picked daniel up and went over to christina's for laksa cooked by chris and mang. :) yum! ate until we were full and then ate some more. ended the night with hot tea and the plot of
prisoner as retold by daniel. hokey pokey joke. i miss the old med lg.
daniel's flying away tomorrow, then mang on monday and abalone on wednesday. i think after next week i'll just stay in shep until after j gets back.
1:04 am
20131227
survived my first week back at work!
nobody questioned any of my clinical decisions over the last two days. sigh of relief. spent most of the morning doing nothing because there wasn't much to do and the boss only wanted to do his round at 1.15pm. -.- was quite annoyed because rounds tend to take hours and i didn't want to have to stay late doing jobs after the intern left. thankfully the round was done in 1.5 hours and we didn't have much to do after.
did a few random jobs, did the discharge summary for the patient who's being palliated (today i found out she has pancreatic cancer), then read emails while waiting for E to be free so i could do my quick handover. left 30 mins early. ;p
i'm surprised by how much effort j is putting into this. did not expect it at all. it's a nice surprise. ;p though i'm beginning to think he's actually thought about it more than i have haha.
ordered swatches, which i am extremely excited about! :D they will be mailed out early next week, i'm told. can't wait to get them.
finally decided to leave the cats here this weekend when i go back to melb. it's difficult to be away from them again after being apart for so long! without j here i really have very little motivation to go back, but this weekend there's brunch and a whole bunch of baking. melting moments and lemon tarts.. though i actually want to make macarons haha.
happy 6th!
10:28 pm
20131226
well i have been searching
all of my days, all of my days
many a road, you know
i've been walking on
all of my days
and i've been trying to find
what's been on my mind
as the days keep turning into night
boxing day!
was actually quite worried about today because i thought some of the things i might not have addressed properly/ adequately yesterday might snowball overnight and cause big problems today. surprisingly, it was a lot quieter than yesterday.
the patient i suspected had a dvt did not have a dvt. the lady who was in atrial flutter with a heart rate of 130 was in sinus rhythm today and her heart rate was 72. hypo lady's bsls were 9.8-14.9. the patient with hyponatraemia has a sodium of 125 today. a patient who'd had urosepsis spiked a temp of 38.3, so i had to do the septic workup, but that was easy. unfortunately though, my patient with ascites who went up to medical is being palliated. oh well, saw that one coming.
rewrote heaps of drug charts. then a nurse came and gave me a chocolate for "being such a good doctor today," which basically meant,
thank you for rewriting all the drug charts. the patient with hyponatraemia asked me why his sodium was low and i said i didn't know (obviously), but i hoped we would be able to fix it. he replied, "with a smile like that, i'm sure you can." if only a smile could fix all the medical problems in the world.
did a tiny bit of boxing day shopping online.
j ignored me for most of the day. :(
10:15 pm
20131225
it's nearly the end of the day but it still doesn't feel like christmas.
didn't do a ward round today but still ended up doing work most of the day. checked on my sickies then checked on others the nurses asked me to see. the patient with the ascites had a met call last night and was moved up to medical.
called the boss twice. called the med reg twice. i hope the patient we're dig loading will be fine. i hope the patient who's getting therapeutic clexane does not actually have a dvt. i hope the patient who i wrote a rough insulin sliding scale for will not have sugars in the 20's or 30's. i hope the patient we put on bumetanide did not actually lose 6kg in 2 days.
finally worked out where to find the relieving roster, after opening every hmo/ resident/ combined roster on the intranet. unfortunately the one for next year isn't up yet. also, medical workforce has kindly made me a reliever for the entire 12 months without telling me. this sucks, i don't want to work anymore.
had the free christmas lunch provided by the hospital, which was exactly the same as standard patient food. couldn't find my name on the list at first, but the kitchen guy was all "don't worry, we'll feed you!"
skyped with j. since i came back to melb we haven't been able to skype for more than half an hour at a time. i don't think this is a good thing.
hopefully none of my patients die on me tomorrow. friday i will have my intern and boss back! then it will finally be the weekend.
8:20 pm
20131224
merry christmas eve!
christmas is coming, the geese are getting fat.
guess what i was doing at 5pm on christmas eve. i was assisting my reg with an ascitic tap. yes, on a subacute ward. on christmas eve. at 5pm.
i am really worried about what my patients are going to do tomorrow. though there are 30 inpatients and maybe 1/3 are going on day leave or even overnight leave... there are 3 who could potentially go downhill very quickly. one of them has a sodium of 121. another was only rousable with a sternal rub and had a BSL of 1.8 today. and the last is my dear oldie with at least 2 litres of fluid around her guts.
the boss is quite worried about some of them as well so he says he'll pop by if he has time. he better have time. D: so terrifying. i realised that i've hardly ever done any medical ward call jobs - which is essentially what this is, except only for one ward. last year i did one med ward call shift and two orthogeri weekends where i basically did the entire ward round by myself then discussed sickies with the consultant on call. and that was it! i don't know any medicine at all! D: *dies*
praying that nobody will die or have a decreased conscious state, that sodiums will magically be 140, potassiums will be 4, urine outputs and blood pressures will be satisfactory, haemoglobins won't drop below 75, blood sugars won't drop below 4... and the list goes on.
fingers crossed.
10:00 pm
20131223
day -29
first day back to work today. found out that one of the bosses is on holiday till 7 jan so we only have to do half the number of ward rounds per week. :D and also, GEM has only 12 patients now. ;p we're discharging another one tomorrow, which will make it 11. but there are a few sickies who are worrying.
my intern is still the slackest intern on earth. -.- wish my reg would tell her she needs to do more work and stop slacking.
while walking out i asked my reg about some of the patients who were there before i left. my favourite is still alive - but has since had two surgeries and is probably still on the surg ward. another two died - one was really unexpected too. :|
so not looking forward to christmas and boxing day. D:
the cats have settled right back into their usual routine - lounging in their favourite spots, opening my kitchen cabinets and playing inside, sleeping beside and on top of me, and rubbing against my legs and rolling over for belly rubs. ;p they seem to especially enjoy the attention in the middle of the night - i hardly ever sleep through the night and they've been left alone at night for the last 4 weeks.
it's not even christmas yet but i'm already thinking about pineapple tarts and chik kwa...
11:58 pm
20131222
30 days to go. wonder what it's going to be like.
i am exhausted. D:
flew back to melbourne overnight. the flight actually felt really short because i fell asleep before we took off, woke up for dinner and to rewatch we're the millers, then slept again pretty much all the way until we started our descent. apparently there was a lot of turbulence so they couldn't serve breakfast.
drove myself home in the yellow submarine. realised that it had been a long time since i drove home from the airport - the last time i went back to sg was in june, and j picked me up then.
was exhausted and decided to not go to church. slept instead. woke up at about 1 to shower and do a bit of reading, then slept again on and off until 5pm.
went to beaconsfield to pick the meows up. :) after playing with coachy for the last few weeks i'd forgotten how huge my cats are. but according to the scales they've lost weight though. :\ one of my favourite things - driving with my cat on my lap. :) it's so nice to have them back! bailey still remembers how to sit haha.
drove straight to shep from beaconsfield. such a long drive - about 3 hours. didn't have anything to eat since dinner last night so i was starving too. ended up getting maccas on the way.
"you must be very upset."
it's been an emotionally draining few days. i'm glad to be able to get a bit of a break from it all. though i do feel tempted to talk about it from time to time.
the parents had lunch with j and his parents after the church christmas drama today, and apparently we paid for it.
back to work tomorrow. :( doesn't feel anything like nearly christmas.
10:47 pm
20131221
day -1
i can't wait to go home.
1:58 am
20131220
day -2
back in sg! finally. developed a massive headache in the plane. i've been having headaches daily the past week. :\
the plan was to have laksa steamboat but the place was closed. :( ended up having hokkien mee at food republic in vivo instead. went back to j's after to rest.
had dinner with his parents and ended up talking about wedding stuff. apparently their discussion carried on long after i went home. originally the plan was oct 2015. yesterday his mum suggested jan 2015, today she suggested dec 2014... and his sister agrees. so does my mother. i wonder if it has crossed their mind that both of us will be in melb most of next year?
am really quite sad about not being able to attend the party. :( sucks to have to work on major holidays. but i will make the melting moments and lemon tart. such a sad farewell. :(
12:13 am
20131219
day -3
i feel like i am constantly walking into situations where the ground falls out beneath my feet and i don't know how to deal with them. sometimes i wish i could just hit fast forward till i'm 70 years old.
anyway. spent the morning tanning by the pool with the sit. am quite happy with my tan at the moment. and i did use sunblock, so hopefully i won't have increased my risk of getting melanoma too drastically.
luncheon meat overdose. spent most of the afternoon watching pretty little liars. had dinner at MK and walked around tesco lotus after. my mother got me a 9 month supply of ocp. prescriptions are not required here.
this has been a rather tiring few weeks. in a way i almost feel like going back to the routine of work might be nice...
10:51 pm
20131217
day -4
went on a day trip today:
- white water rafting (kept getting splashed by the guides of other boats)
- elephant show (a baby elephant playing the harmonica, playing with a hula hoop using its trunk, and kissing us)
- visiting a waterfall (didn't swim, it was too cold)
- rode an ATV (though i gave up and told my guide "aiyah you just drive lah")
- met a tiny ginger kitten
default thinking.
10:05 pm
20131216
day -5
went to the airport to send fath and j off. :( my aunty says that now that j is gone, i am single again haha. ;p
had breakfast and then was coerced into playing queen maria with the boy cousins because the girl cousins were still sleeping and they needed another player. wasn't too bad. spent the rest of the morning watching shows.
had lunch in the hotel, then went to jungceylon to "shop." bought a ring and necklace from diva. wanted to get one of those essential oil burner things for j (his favourite thing in the world) but they didn't have very nice ones so i deferred. such a long drive there and back.
skyped with j. :)
sometimes everything gets so much that i actually look forward to going home in 5 days. also, my cats. need to squeeze them.
10:16 pm
20131215
day -6
trying to not read j's blog over his shoulder as he blogs.
did nothing much today. had a family sunday service where fath shared about stewardship and sowing and reaping. you only live twice (yolt).
did a tiny bit of shopping at the factory outlet, where j tried to convince me to buy stuff so i could run with him... hmm. had lunch at MK at the big C. over ordered and had
a lot of duck. so full.
went for an oil massage after, it wasn't particularly good. they used so much oil it was as if they were going to deep fry me. -.-
had dinner at a nearby restaurant, ordered
so much food again. it was pretty good though.
am so tired now, not quite sure why. j is flying back tomorrow. :( :( :( what am i going to dooooo. :(
11:08 pm
20131214
day -7
i am running out of time.
really missing my meows too. i just want to pick them up and squeeze them.
11:11 pm
20131213
it's friday the thirteenth! nothing coincidental happened today.
went island hopping - phi phi island, monkey island, maya bay, and khai island. did some snorkelling, swimming, sleeping, eating. didn't really get much of a tan. j is completely chao ta though.
still having headaches.
had wood fired pizzas for dinner. so full, i don't have any room for the mango with sticky rice. no nice shows on tv tonight.
still feel like i'm bobbing up and down on the sea. hopefully we won't be eaten by mosquitos tonight.
8 days left.
9:54 pm
went to tiger kingdom to touch tiger cubs today! so cute. though they were quite sleepy. likely post prandial, i think. j was terrified and kept asking me not to touch them. :p
the villa keeps having blackouts. rather annoying. couldn't go on the water slide. :( so we just swam for a while. had dinner at the restaurant over at leamhin pier.
i keep getting headaches. think it's the sea.
watched part of life of pi after dinner. how apt, after playing with tigers today. :p
salted toothpaste is weird.
5:09 am
20131211
tomorrow night, the lights will appear
just like they do on my birthday each year
what is it like, out there where they glow
it's 11.12.13 today. we watched a couple struggle to light floating lanterns out on the pier in the wind. when they eventually managed to light one and finally released it, it promptly fell into the sea.
11:59 pm
20131210
the cold never bothered me anyway
(no not really)
sometimes i feel like i need a holiday from this holiday. stressful times.
adventure cove was good though. would have been nice to have been able to go on the slides more than once. thank God for the good weather. though i'm a bit burnt now.
maybe it's all a matter of perspective. maybe, if i were the last.
11:33 pm
so i'll read a book, or maybe two or three
i'll add a few new paintings to my gallery
i'll play guitar and knit and cook and basically
just wonder when will my life begin
need to learn to think before i speak...
12:08 am
20131208
if only it would be easier to breathe.
11:17 pm
it was sunny today. :O but there was no time to go to adventure cove, sigh.
yurong picked me up and we went to grace methodist church for linda's wedding. :) met william and edwin even before we got there haha. it was really nice seeing everyone again. 4A had a turn out of 15 people. also met yus there haha. the wedding was very pinteresty. food was not bad too. we were all so full when we left.
randomly went to sentosa after with yurong, yuming, and shuzhen. yurong drove around and we ended up in the beaufort hotel. there were 4 weddings on today so we went to have a look. ;p the tables were all set up but the people weren't around. found sofas in an air conditioned area and just sat there talking (about weddings) for a while. no one chased us away. ;p everyone is getting married in 2015! except yurong. august 2014. ;p
went to holland to meet j. (am so glad the fight is over) had some sotong head onstik and he had a chicken wing while walking. took a bus to dempsey and walked to the white rabbit. had drinks there and he kept complaining about how it was overpriced, the girl didn't know how to pour beer, mosquitos were eating us alive. okay lor, don't go there lor.
walked over to ps cafe for dinner with his best friend and his gf. wasn't too bad even with my social anxiety. sigh of relief. jess and samuel were sitting at the next table but i didn't say hi, too awkward. :| j took 174 back with me and helped me download shows, then i walked him back to the bus stop. trying to discourage him from cabbing or asking his siblings to fetch him.
super dislike wearing make up but i had it on for >12 hours today. D: and contacts as well. my eyes are so bloodshot now. time to sleep.
12:08 am
20131207
"And in the bottom of Pandora's box, all that remained... was hope."
12:03 am
20131206
time is running out.
12:03 am
20131204
unexpectedly-
being back in singapore is the worst. i don't know how i'm ever going to survive living here forever. today i looked around and took things in in a different light. previously this has always been something i've had to endure only when i'm back during the holidays. but to do life here? every day? it would take a lot of getting used to.
the up side of being back, of course, is that i get to spend time with j again! :) though we don't really know what there is to do here, ha. he picked us up from the airport and sent us home. had lunch with the moth and sit at toh yi, then walked to btp to develop my film and walked home.
went to his place after and looked at baby photos. it always feels weird being in someone else's house. followed him to pick his brother up from work, then went to town. walked around and had dinner at ippudo. :) then his sister drove us to sim lim so he could look for his camera bag, which he couldn't find. but i'm sure he will buy one within a day.
pay day today! though i'm earning a meagre salary.
i want a smeg fridge.
so not looking forward to next year.
11:07 pm
20131203
day 4! home tomorrow! :)
had breakfast at the same restaurant, then went to disneyland! wandered around with the sit for a bit until it was time for the fmsp band performance. video-ed and took photos etc. the song is stuck in my head now haha.
walked around more after with the moth and opi as well. walked around the new areas and went for a few rides. liked the roller coaster at the grizzly gulch. was quite amazed at how much space it occupied. bought some sour vineyards and then left at 2pm. perhaps i will love theme parks more when i have kids? hurhur.
went shopping with the sit after, we felt really accomplished and unpressurised (is this a word?) haha. went to ifc mall first to get macarons from pierre herme. suuuuper expensive i nearly died when i calculated how much it cost. D: plus i got the christmas box haha. oh well. went to central after to get film, but they increased the price and it was >$4 per roll now, so i didn't get any.
went to tai cheong to get egg tarts, then since we were in the area i brought my sister to have ice cream at xtc. :) had hong kong milk tea and sea salt caramello, which were both really good. like,
really good. went back to causeway bay to get lord stow egg tarts, they weren't sold out today! :) got a box of 6. which is good, because now j wants one too.
it was really nice walking around familiar parts of hk without using a map. :) reminds me so much of my elective days.
good thing i didn't go around mongkok looking for camera shops because j already bought his new camera. -.- at the rate he spends money i will never be able to stop working. -.- should have gotten him the toy story piggybank.
had dinner at the the same restaurant
again. my grandfather ordered some kind of inedible shellfish
again. but we had lobster noodles! though the noodles were really buttery. apparently that is normal though, daniel says.
went to h&m again to buy tshirts haha. nearly all packed and ready to flyyy.
10:25 pm
20131202
oh i just can't wait... to be king
(no seriously)
(can't wait to go home and rest)
(singapore is fine but melbourne would be even better)
(except that j is in singapore)
day 3. breakfast at maccas (i know right) in langham place, then took the train to lo wu. not sure why my grandmother wanted to go there. people smoke indoors and follow you around asking you to buy stuff.
everybody else (except tata) bought fake branded things. -.- had not nice dim sum for lunch and then went back to hk.
the grandparents went back to mongkok while we went to festival walk, which was a bit like ifc. only bought a top and shoes from h&m. went to causeway bay after but the excelsior's lord stow egg tarts were sold out. :( went to hui lau shan instead and then came back to the apartment to rest for a while before dinner.
had dinner at cheers restaurant (second time there this trip and we're going back again for breakfast tomorrow). so full. didn't finish 30% of the food. but i actually had two serves of vegetables. :O omnivore indeed.
disneyland tomorrow!
10:20 pm
20131201
doesn't matter where, doesn't matter when
day 2 in hk. went to jordan to have scrambled egg sandwiches at the australian dairy company. the queue was super long so i ended up eating there with the sit while the moth and grandparents ate noodles. didn't actually have to wait that long though, so we ate there instead of dabao-ing. the grumpy older guy wanted to charge us extra for taking the milk bottles away but the younger guy didn't charge us extra in the end. :)
happy birthday tata!
took 970 to hku but missed the stop and had to walk back. same route i took when i walked to central last time. ;p took a while but managed to find the grand hall. had starbucks while waiting for the fmsp band to arrive. watched a hk primary school band perform before the fmsp one. their kids were really little and they didn't play very well (and also the poor little girl dropped the cymbals). when they asked a representative to describe her band in 3 words, she said "they are too small, i cannot say." hilarious. the fmsp band played better but their songs were really simple. doubt they'll win. :|
went back to mongkok to meet the grandparents. went back out to tsim sha tsui to have some pai guat choy fan and buy almond cookies. i can still remember how to get around. :) also ducked into a few camera shops to check out prices for j. was surprised by an old man's english. bought a pink chopping board shaped like a pig. :D matches my pink scanpan knife haha. ;p walked around a bit more and then came back to the apartment to rest a bit before dinner.
had dinner at a restaurant in langham place with tata's niece and nephew (and their families). so much food. D: so full. walked around a bit more after that but didn't buy anything.
going to shen zhen tomorrow.
11:05 pm