hello!
27
(doctor!)
singapore/ sunny coast
melbourne! ♥
(would love to bake for a cafe/
?bird & brie)
wallflower
☁
my brother says i am
a cumulonimbus cloud :)
also
and just enough strength to live for today
so i never have to worry
what tomorrow will bring
‘cause my faith is on a solid rock
i am counting on God
♡
in dreams and in love
there are no impossibilities.
- jános arany
☼
You make all things
work together for my good.
people
peiyu; caleb; kevin; daniel; joel;
lois; susanna; june; jane; cheryl;
yuwan; christina; jocelyn;
ivy; mangyik; jasmine; ida; valerie;
jason; joab; shaun; jintat;
jonathan chua; freedy; gary;
iris; sammy; nicky;
love
history
March 2005;
April 2005;
May 2005;
June 2005;
July 2005;
August 2005;
September 2005;
October 2005;
November 2005;
December 2005;
January 2006;
February 2006;
March 2006;
April 2006;
May 2006;
June 2006;
July 2006;
August 2006;
September 2006;
October 2006;
November 2006;
December 2006;
January 2007;
February 2007;
March 2007;
April 2007;
May 2007;
June 2007;
July 2007;
August 2007;
September 2007;
October 2007;
November 2007;
December 2007;
January 2008;
February 2008;
March 2008;
April 2008;
May 2008;
June 2008;
July 2008;
August 2008;
September 2008;
October 2008;
November 2008;
December 2008;
January 2009;
February 2009;
March 2009;
April 2009;
May 2009;
June 2009;
July 2009;
August 2009;
September 2009;
October 2009;
November 2009;
December 2009;
January 2010;
February 2010;
March 2010;
April 2010;
May 2010;
June 2010;
July 2010;
August 2010;
September 2010;
October 2010;
November 2010;
December 2010;
January 2011;
February 2011;
March 2011;
April 2011;
May 2011;
June 2011;
July 2011;
August 2011;
September 2011;
October 2011;
November 2011;
December 2011;
January 2012;
February 2012;
March 2012;
April 2012;
May 2012;
June 2012;
July 2012;
August 2012;
September 2012;
October 2012;
November 2012;
December 2012;
January 2013;
February 2013;
March 2013;
April 2013;
May 2013;
June 2013;
July 2013;
August 2013;
September 2013;
October 2013;
November 2013;
December 2013;
January 2014;
February 2014;
March 2014;
April 2014;
May 2014;
June 2014;
July 2014;
August 2014;
September 2014;
October 2014;
November 2014;
January 2015;
February 2015;
March 2015;
April 2015;
May 2015;
June 2015;
July 2015;
August 2015;
February 2016;
March 2016;
April 2016;
June 2016;
July 2016;
August 2016;
September 2016;
October 2016;
November 2016;
credits
Layout: /strawberrying
20110331
- the chinese lady died this morning :( :( :( i just watched them put a chest tube in yesterday evening and i felt so distressed for her. and then she died! they should have just not done it. :\
- so many squirrels around the hospital and condo! :) saw one today, it jumped up the tree trunk and looked at me, then start jumping from branch to branch haha.
- saw the leo cat again this morning haha. there are 4 or 5 of them i think. one of them wanted to rub him/herself against my leg yesterday, i quickly ran away.
- tute cancelled this afternoon! and my supervisor was too busy to do my mcr. but going back to hospital was not a wasted trip because i found a houseman who will sign my attendance sheet! ;p hahaha. was worrying about that, since the first houseman (who is totally like me) refused. but this guy said "can lah, i will sign anything." :) i know who to look for next week when my supervisor isn't around again. ;p
- my baby brother got facebook! tagged him in a couple of photos but the internet is so slow i can't be bothered anymore haha.
- waiting for kevin to arrive! tioman tomorrow! :D
- and there is an up side to this.. :)
11:11 pm
20110330
a houseman was talking about this today. he couldn't remember the name of the model (neither, did i, i only remembered elizabeth kubler-ross ;p), so he googled "stages of death." what?! anyway, it's actually the 5 stages of grief. 1. denial 2. anger 3. bargaining 4. depression 5. acceptance just a random thing we learnt in first year i think. i remember the diagram i drew with the person whistling before she fell into the pit, ha. talked to zepeng! lazy to study for the mcr(?s) already. it's going to be a long day in hospital.. at least 11 hours? oh well. after that it's tioman! :)
11:58 pm
i keep getting confused as to which account uses my actual gmail password and which one just uses the email account as the username. : we were going to have a bedside tute with shwe but he was stuck somewhere between singapore and jb (we think). so the tute's postponed to next week. which is nice, cos i was going to fall asleep. ;p hot day. but also crazily windy. going to do my mcrs tomorrow. supposedly. he said he's going to question me. so.. there's no patient involved? not that i could actually take a history anyway.. but he's going to pit me against a houseman, heh. die. another day of translating for my supervisor in clinic. at least it's more interesting than listening to endless conversations in malay heh. it's nice to meet singaporeans who speak english haha. hku got my stuff and the person (i still haven't figured out if it's male/female) is sending it to the hospital authority of hong kong. hope it's approved because i already have my air tickets. and so do my parents haha. but they said it'll take 3-4 months to confirm it. :\ that means i'll only know at the end of june?! :\ kevin went to pick my shoes up and buy us film. :) he bought ex boardshorts. so bitchy, what's up with that. anyway, one more day till tioman! :) holiday before i start dying again! so tired! but back to work! i miss my mba! no weird paragraphing problems! :(
5:57 pm
20110329
think i've reached my data limit on the internet thing haha. still works, just that it's slowww.
an old lady made my day today! i don't really know why. met her in the surgery block and walked her to the ortho clinic (i nearly typed klinik :\). had a nice conversation with her in chinese haha. being in msia is helping me improve my chinese. ;p
and jlin liked two of my photos on fb! which is cool. though i think he only liked the one of tuna because it's a photo of a cat. and actually i don't really like his photos haha, what does that say about me liking him liking mine? >.< haha nevermind lah, he's a professional after all. ;p
am extremely stressed about school work. and 5th year is supposed to not be stressful right? i wonder how i even got through 3rd and 4th years.
anyway, when i asked my supervisor about taking leave on friday for tioman, he said "of course, no problem. enjoy yourself!" haha. but he's also going to be away next tues-thurs, meaning i am seriously running out of time for my modules, ha. procrastinator. but i really don't know how to clerk patients who cannot speak english. and my chinese is obviously still too chapalang to take a proper history. plus there are no patients on my ward with leg ulcers/ wound infections. forgot to bring my shoes!
NEED TO DO WORK RAWR.
9:47 pm
20110328
i keep having to think before typing my password nowadays. :( miss my old one. woke up late and left home late, though that was jeremiah's fault. dropped the sister and brother (and jeremiah) off at school, pumped petrol, and came to jb. dropped my stuff at home and gave my mother the stuff to mail to hku, then they dropped me in hsa. the last thing my father said to me: "wear a life jacket when you go snorkelling!" haha. uber stressed about hku. the documents are supposed to arrive at least 6 months before the elective commences, which in my case means 3 april. :3 my mother sent everything by dhl because she was the one who kept procrastinating getting my insurance thing done.. but what if that isn't everything they wanted? :\ no time! ahh! (don't ahh, look to God!) felt like i was going to die today. might have been dehydrated? don't know. developed a throbbing headache after lunch and went home at 3+. :\ napped while waiting for the water to heat up. still felt like dying after a shower. but after a couple of hours i felt better, though still tired. i complain about being tired so much, i think it may actually be a real problem. either that, or just a psychological one haha. skyped with kevin! attempted to help with his new AE-1 but i don't really know much either haha. i learnt to use it over whatsapp i think. ;p shutter speed and aperture and everything. 3 episodes of 30 Rock. maybe 4. getting some studying done now. think the next couple of days will pass a bit more quickly because of tutes (one a day). can't wait for friday! ;p will try to sleep early tonight.. the lenovo does weird things with blogger paragraphing.
11:16 pm
20110327
rawr. :(
lunch at cafe cartel in IMM. i'm not a big cafe cartel fan. went home, then drove to btp to develop my film. the uncle let me develop express. :) went home and "rested" for a while.
went to ecp to cycle with the family. isaac learnt to cycle. ;p ended up with grease all over his legs haha. felt like i hadn't cycled in forever. took a few photos.
dropped by btp on the way back to collect kevin's and my photos. :) had dinner at home, with prawns that isaac and father caught while prawning this morning. nice prawns. uploaded photos and came to kap to meet kevin.
suddenly remembered when sandy was a tiny puppy and was too scared to go down stairs.
studying is so sian. :(
only going back to jb tomorrow morning. the down side is that i have to get up at like 6. :\ my parents will drop my siblings off at school then bring me over. then i'll just drop my stuff off at the condo and go to hospital, sigh. my supervisor's back, no more slacking. :( must remember the goal.
clear-headed thinking.
11:23 pm
big sigh. :(
- stressful encounter
- knut died of an epileptic fit
- i will need to do my own laundry starting tomorrow
- i just feel like sleeping forever
- it isn't worth it!
12:49 pm
talking to ching how to make rong jealous. ;p hahahaha. he called me fawny. ;p i don't know where that came from either!
was going to go watch World Invasion with kevin and caleb but my mother complained about my excessive petrol consumption ($15 last night, i don't even know why!). :( but i'm tired and there wasn't very much time anyway so i decided not to go. :|
went to mbs today, briefly. also managed to not get lost in suntec. achievement. ;p
i think we were all a bit cranky today.
brunched at jones the grocer. thought the breakfast blt was good actually. ;p maybe it's just the avocado and tomato haha. ;p yum.
caleb intro-ed us to eggette! which i quite like. ;p though it takes a while to make.
syc concert! i liked the song Zakuro. :) listening to it on youtube now but i think the syc version was a nicer. and sissy likes dobrogosz. ;p
met daniel in suntec! he said i looked and sounded more mature haha. then he changed it to "more professional." ;p and then "and you can still smile ah?" that's the usual reaction i get. there must be something wrong with me.
isaac: "moth, where do sitar e-pony?" - this translates to "mother, where is sister's iphone?" ;p he says he doesn't see anything wrong with me having two phones. ;p
1:06 am
20110326
apparently my gmail account has been accessed from argentina and canada recently? strange. changed my password. but i really should start coming up with my own passwords, ha.
anyway, much love today despite my dysfunctional colon! to think i was studying fluid losses today too. -.- the irony. i must be dehydrated now..
brunched at Prive with kevin and rong. awesome eggs ben! and by far the best brunch i've had in singapore yet. :)
went to collect our photos and went home for a bit. then drove to holland to pick kevin up, and drove to town. parked far far away. walking is good for you.
bought camera straps and tofus. :) watched community simultaneously. ;p then did some work. then caleb, laimeng, and rong came and we went to eat durian ccf! it shrank though. :( sad. think jidechi is better. dabaoed for my mother and brother.
brought kevin and rong back to my place because i brought the wrong set of photos out. sent kevin his photos. sent rong and kevin home.
went for supper, fei fei wan ton mee! only ate a bit. then we went to the durian shop, which was closing. but the uncle turned the lights back on and sold us two mao shan wangs for $25! ate at a bus stop across the road, where we could see an indian man in a sarong, who kept scratching his butt. but the durian was yum. :)
mr fong so mean, he wants to destroy me. :(
heart to hearts. things people live to regret.
i love my AE-1. :) it somehow manages to make things prettier. :)
been having random conversations with random people these few days.
it's like poking a cat with a stick to see how much it will take before it decides to stick out its claws and slash you.
#misses
5:46 am
20110325
home! :) and i already have himym and last week's modern family. :) promises to be another unproductive night haha.
(28)
1:18 am
20110324
why so angsty?
today was a rather rubbish day. ended up doing nothing except for watching a million episodes of 30 Rock and that ENT/surg tute. and i could only answer 2 questions in the entire tute, ha. cartilage and facial nerve paralysis. -.- but all the questions he asked were so obscure we didn't even begin to know how to answer most of them haha. he looks like gary.
am pretty much packed other than my towel and bedsheet. ;p my mother offered to pick me up tonight instead of tomorrow morning. :) and i gladly accepted, of course!
brunching with kevin tomorrow. :) and we're going to collect our photos too. eggcite. :D
it's like opening the wound up every day to check its progress.
have this weird protective instinct. which i do nothing about, because i'm not supposed to know. and also because i have no idea where this weird protective instinct is coming from. supposed to be frenemies, ha.
adrenals.
flying in 23 days! :3 miss char.
the day someone asked if we were twins. ;p
10:10 pm
backfire
getting fat. :( so depressing, especially with tioman coming up! i resolve to do my leg lifts every day. doubt it'll do much though, with all the junk i'm consuming haha. really should weigh myself the next time i'm home.
can't go home tomorrow night anymore! :( we have an ENT tute tomorrow arvo and my mother has a dinner thing.. so i'll have to wait till friday morning. but she's fetching me at like 7+am haha. ;p slackerrr.
anyway, tioman! :D next weekend! eggcite. hope the weather's good though! it hasn't been great lately..
went to uni at about 10.30am. did most of one module, which is considered a lot of work for me. ;p discussed tioman and rooming. and alcohol for the guys, ha.
nice songs on klove.
tute with shwe baw, he used my notebook as his whiteboard since we were in another room today. but his writing is undecipherable. mostly pictures though haha. mesentery, mesocolon, mesoappendix, mesorchium.
checked flights to melbourne again haha. 893 in a month and during easter.. think it's not bad lor haha.
visited gary's lg tonight. :) was fun. had to jump off chairs that were lifted up while blindfolded haha. facing your giants.
unfailing love, so unreserved
You gave Your life on calvary
and now i stand, forever free
my Saviour rescued me
1:13 am
20110323
strange things last night! so geli. wanted to dig a hole and bury myself in it. haha somehow it reminds me of secondary school and pokemon ee. not great memories but now it's just funny haha.
jaiwant tried to tempt me into going home tonight. but i think my parents have cell group tonight. and i was also thinking of going for gary's. and i really don't want to go back myself because i keep bringing so many things back and forth heh. settled.
plan: go to school for an early lunch at 11, then do work till the bedside tute, which has been pushed back an hour because of clinical skills.
didn't realise that white = double lined = takes forever to dry.
abdo is super uncomfortable. :(
i keep forgetting the goal. :\
10:30 am
20110322
composing texts on a nokia is so annoying.
went to ong shun for dinner with gary. and am contemplating going for his lg tomorrow.. see how heh. if i do go i really need to get more work done during the day.
wonder if i am perpetuating something.
structured work is supposed to be good but i wish i could just pick and choose. so rubbish i know.
one thing i am sure of..
11:06 pm
hello.
wanted to go back to the clinical school to do some work this afternoon/ evening. but now that i'm back in the apartment i'm lazy to go out. : just feel like sleeping forever. -.- as usual.
woke up at 2+ and 5+ this morning with a craving for cheesecake. which is weird considering i don't even like cheesecake that much. will bake it when i go back to melb haha. ;p
had a bedside tute where i had trouble understanding everyone. and kept tuning out, sigh.
actually did some work at clinic today with mr syed. took a couple of histories in chinese haha. not bad for chinese lor. ;p but then i had to do a pr on an old man and i didn't know how to explain it to him. :\ then we saw a haemorrhoid banding.
then i studied a bit in school, had lunch, watched some 30 rock, and took a nap. checked out the tioman resort and thistle shuttle stuff for kevin. :) and should probably start doing some work now..
7:06 pm
"moving is the best medicine"
slept with the fan at 3 instead of 2 but i don't think it made a difference. and i still woke up at 2+ and a couple more times. what is wrong with me! :(
the grandparents brought me out for bak kut teh. :) came home and did nothing for a bit, then went to jjk for my massage. which was better than the previous one, but my shoulders are still knotted. then again they've been knotted for years..
went to btp to develop my film. the old man said he didn't turn the machine on today so he didn't want to develop it today. :( have to wait till thursday then. i always find myself taking rubbish photos at the end of rolls of film because i'm too impatient and want to see the rest of the roll heh.
finished packing and left home at 5. went to giant first to get groceries. then there was this massive jam on the way to the apartment. road works meant three lanes became one lane during the peak period. so smart.
shalini brought us out for dinner at some chinese place with nice salted egg pork ribs. ;p then she came over for a while. they said they'll bring me up to the roof one day. apparently it's a small concrete space with a very low ledge so i would fall off on a windy day. evan said to bring rope, and lucy said to bring a noose.
bedside tute tomorrow at 8am = no ward rounds yeay. don't know what's happening after that but at least i have people to follow around this week. :)
people are going to melb and i am offering everyone my living room and taxi service haha. so exciting that people are visiting though! :) it's always nice to have people over. :) it's also a chance to be a tourist haha. ;p
step 1.
step 2.
:) it's a new day!
12:52 am
20110320
am thankful that my supervisor is away. :)
brunched at Graze with kevin and rong. :) food was better than Rider's, but i can't really judge because i didn't order something with bread and nice eggs. but for $28, i still think you can get a lot better.
kevin says we have to brunch twice next week to increase our chances of finding a good brunch place before i go back to melb. so tempted to give myself a 3-day week and come back on thurs night! so slack right. ;p
rong didn't load her instax. :( and kevin went to develop his film at joo ann foh which is extortion! more than double the price at btp lor. i still haven't finished my film. :( hopefully can finish it tomorrow then develop express haha. only 3 or 4 shots left anyway.
wish they'd go to melb to visit. cheryl is also going melb haha. and yap min. and amy. and maybe ian. and tioman, sigh.
MY PINHOLE CAMERA. is still not with me. :|
tata lent me his malay-english dictionary haha.
vital exhaustion and anhedonia.
miss my flowy hair much. hurry up and grow out please!
10:34 pm
impending.. not doom, just.. impending something. oh well. so weird that i keep getting nervous about it. what's the point, right?
oscillating. like a pendulum.. brings me back to physics spa and ms ong haha. but yes, oscillating.
went to suntec for service.. the hall looked like 1/3 of the indoor stadium haha. though i may be mistaken, haven't been there for years.
cabbed to dpv and then immediately went to holland for yoghurt and malibu haha. benny drove. got muffin ingredients too. caleb was gone from the party for an hour hahaha.
went to wish laimeng happy birthday and eat. then cake, and individual instaxes haha. nobody wanted to play games. had helium instead. i read/ heard somewhere it's bad for your throat..? lots of extra food.
weren't supposed to bake, but we did anyway. silent baking. mixed the ingredients in kevin's room haha. but as usual the smell of baking muffins pervaded the whole apartment haha. think the banana wasn't ripe enough.. and there were too many chocolate chips lah, so overpowering!
rong sent me home. :) without using garmin haha. i'm itching to drive...
seems like i can't sleep for more than 5 hours straight. :| woke up at 7.30ish. there would've been enough time, but i was too lazy. besides, impending.
will finish my film and develop it today, and collect it tomorrow! :) yeay.
keep thinking i should self-thought block. but the thought that follows immediately is always that i am on a train and i don't have to get off at the station haha. hassed success! not that i actually practise it though. i think i really should, but mindfulness takes so much effort and.. mindfulness, ha.
♥ lara even though she keeps running away from me.
oh and in church someone asked if my sister and i were twins! HAHA. we are five years apart! ;p but it may have had something to do with us wearing opposite colours and similar specs haha. ;p
and blog-worthy comment about why snails mate for half a day haha.
11:43 am
20110319
it ain't so hard to take
last night was a mystery. can't figure out what happened.
have to stop being like opportunistic bacteria and start being a spectator ion heh.
went to hv coffee bean to meet kevin and mr fong! :) mr fong was complaining about how i didn't say hi on fb despite having been back for so long haha. ;p studied a little while kevin watched community, then we walked around chip bee and took photos. hopefully can finish the roll and develop it on sunday.. then i can collect it on monday before going back to jb. :) long weekend!
61 home for the awkward ac bbq. but i just had dinner and then abandoned my sister haha. but she knew some of them anyway. watched glee. ;p declined supper and slept at 10 haha. but i haven't been sleeping well for such a long time.
went to ikea to buy stuff to get free parking, as singaporeans do. printed stuff at queensway and had laksa and muah chee. :D reminiscent of malan road connected by earphone cable days.
think i'll come back early next weekend as well since my supervisor won't be around. ;p
one last thing to do.
3:59 pm
20110317
the more i think...
my mother called to ask something about the insurance thing. she asked me: "why are you studying ah?" amazing right, when your mother asks you why you are studying instead of why you aren't studying? ;p
i really hope there isn't another rainstorm tonight.
feel like baking... and i was randomly looking at my aunty's photos of gizmo on fb and i want another chinchilla! haha. means i'll have to stay in sg... ;p
had a freddo's craving today. and durian puree haha.
might as well just get it over and done with...
11:03 pm
don't stand, don't stand so close to me ;p
so far in jb i have only taken one photo on my ae-1 haha. zzz.
went to school to try and study. had a headache.. came back and had lunch. my supervisor asked me to take the day off to "settle my stuff" haha. doing bits and pieces of my modules now.
also washed all the towels i used to mop up the water in my room. there are baby pigeons on that balcony, according to lucy. i haven't actually seen them though. but the big pigeons always fly away when the door is opened. and there is a lot of bird shit there haha.
semi-packed!
and this guy we met at OC one year was in the newspaper for abusing a bird?! was reading stonline in school and i thought his name sounded familiar.. so i went to fb to check the photos out. but i think he shut it down. anyway. no one i know has ever been in the newspaper before i think? except banana who got her forum letter published. ;p
6:14 pm
it rained again early this morning. i mean, it's still raining now, but it rained like mad again just now. woke up in the middle of the rainstorm to close the windows because my room was flooding again. and one of the windows can't close completely.. so water was pouring in. after a while i gave up and went back to bed. annoyingly, the storm stopped by 7am. -.-
but i'm not going in now anyway because it's still raining and i left my umbrella in the clinical school yesterday. i hope no one steals it. :\ for now i'm sitting in bed in a dress. -.- which is getting all scrunched up but i can't be bothered. can't wait to get out of here.
asked my mother to pick me up at 1 tomorrow haha. forgot that it's the school holidays so she's freer. so anyway my parents are picking me up, we're going for lunch, then i'm going homeee. :) but i really need to get some work done this weekend. :
skyped with daniel last night. read and watched some 30 rock and slept at 11+ i think. and strangely i don't feel exhausted now. granted, i only woke up twice last night. woke up the first time at 4.30 and thought about strange things, then woke up in the rainstorm and continued thinking..
going to spend some time tumblring and then possibly doing some work. ;p
10:15 am
20110316
and if you see my reflection
in the snow-covered hills
well maybe
the landslide will bring you down
i forgot to close the windows today and my room was flooded! :( well it wasn't really that i forgot.. it just didn't cross my mind at all. :( and then it rained like mad in the afternoon. :( but i've mopped most of it up and i hope it dries without too much damage!
went for ward round with evan and hui ting. saw the lady with the nec fasc as well in ICU. her wound keeps getting bigger because they keep having to go back to theatre to debride it. but this time it seems good.
clinic. he taught more.. probably cos there were three of us. but towards the end we were starving and just waiting for it to be over haha. went across to zz for lunch. then to the clinical school and back to the ward for bedside tute.
TB or lymphoma. actually saw that patient just after he was admitted, on the night rounds. it was hilarious how at the end of the tute henry went: "so what was the conclusion of that?" the tutor is really difficult to understand because of his strong accent.
went to the clinical school to study a bit while waiting for the crazy rain to stop. but when i wanted to leave they started fumigating the place. -.-
so difficult to study at home though. think i need to start camping at the clinical school a bit more.. when i come home i just want to watch shows and sleep haha.
on another note, i would really like to stop having these dreams. and also i would like the stupid bugs to stop buzzing around my face when i'm trying to sleep! :( spent more time awake last night because of the stupid bugs. when i woke up there was a dead fly and a dead mozzie on my bed! and there was still more buzzing. D: so annoying.
yeay more than half the school week's gone. ;p envious of hui ting who gets to fly to melb on weds (and miss half the last week of surg haha). she's also going to sg this weekend to fly kites at marina barrage haha. something i haven't even done yet.
and i see that happening again.... but i think i really need to get my sleep sorted out first. also i really hate going out once i'm settled at home (which is usually quite early). so. we'll see..
10:51 pm
20110315
+ 4.5 hours of continuous sleep! but the rest was still fragmented.
+ had a dejavu dream.. but it was a bit different from before.
+ my toilet now has to be flushed manually. :(
+ but lucy taught me how to get the water to a reasonable temperature. :)
+ had a bedside tute in the morning.
+ jaiwant brought us out for chicken rice.
+ had a clinical skills tute in the afternoon, learnt how to put in a chest tube.
+ shalini told me that when she was doing surgery she used to leave hospital at 12nn every friday! i should try to do that haha.
+ trying to finish reading my articles.
+ still need to do my modules zzz.
+ tried to use the lenovo to produce a wifi signal so i can use the internet on my mba. it connects but i still can't use the internet, oh well.
+ having both backspace and delete keys confuses me. have been using a mac for too long!
+ at some point i need to go around and take some proper photos of our little part of jb.
10:28 pm
yay! the internet finally works! :) now if only i can get a continuous night's sleep...
went to hospital for rounds at 8am. then my supervisor disappeared.. assumed there was clinic (he said there was clinic every mon/ weds/ fri), so after reading some patient notes i went down to the clinic. waited till 9.30am then gave up. went back to the ward for a while, then went to the clinical school to read my articles.
afternoon rounds.. then he disappeared again.. went back to the clinical school to continue reading articles. annoying computer refused to log everyone in. my supervisor finally replied my sms. went to the A&E to find him. then he did a gastroscopy. then back to the A&E. then dinner. then ward rounds again. then he said there was nothing exciting and went home haha.
my feet are dying. and i have symmetrical bruises under my toenails. :\
OH and that day i spelt police as polis omg. D:
went to rider's cafe with ian. walked around while waiting for a window seat. all angmohs leh. he asked why angmohs like to ride horses and asians like to shop. but riding horses is tiring haha. ;p leg and butt pain lor. food wasn't great.. i can't remember what a good brunch tastes like anymore. :( but he says bishan got good brunch. and another place i forgot.
went to west mall to return the library book and get biscuits. omitted the eye drops though he shouldn't have.. refrained from getting my screen protector in case my phone dies again. ;p i dropped it last night! :\
tried to read articles at home but failed. ended up napping and woke up with a headache and feeling like i was going to die. :( showered and packed and went down for dinner. all the SOT people, some med students who went to haiti with my father, some people from haiti etc. left after about 45 mins.
don't have to go for ward rounds tomorrow morning because my supervisor is going to hospital kulai for clinic. :) so i get to sleep in! if i can, that is. but there's still the bedside tute, for which i have to present a case... i think it's rather rubbish but. :\
also quite annoying to have the use the new lenovo but well. at least the internet works. :) will miss the mba though. but i will still use it to watch shows haha. ;p if i have the timeee.
decided that it's too tiring. as much as i want to, i don't want to. push + pull = standstill.
and according the one of the angmohs we don't actually have to go on call? so i might not do it anymore haha. sleeeeeep. ;p
2:02 am
20110313
i'm too tired. i want to take a day off to sleep for 24 hours.
7:39 pm
so i've made up my mind, ha. holiday. ;p
woke up at 7.50am this morning. only about 5 hours of sleep, but 5 hours in a row nonetheless. better than what i've had all week. :x
went to the comcentre again with my mother because my bb camera stopped working. so zzz right bb. or maybe it's just mine, my sister's is still fine. they restored it again but the camera still couldn't work so they replaced the handset. again. i've had my bb for less than 3 weeks and already this is my third handset. :| you've got to be kidding me! anyway this one has all the stickers so i'm happy haha. my mother says to give it at least a week before i put a screen protector haha.
the durian ccf place seems to have its tables and chairs back. my mother wanted to dabao but it wasn't open.. and the carpark is only cheap on sundays lor.
went to pick my brother up from tuition, then my father from home, and went to clementi for duck rice and roast pork. :D then they bought some experimental catfish for the tank.
came home and printed all my articles. the printer is running out of black ink. made it through one article. then we left for church.
they're moving to suntec next week. whenever they ask to pray for the church for the move i feel weird. because i'm not really part of it..
dinner at some coffee shop nearby where we tried to solve the river quiz but failed. so far. :| and my father parked the car in the multistorey carpark which had a height limit of 1.8m. the car is 1.8m high, so... yeah.
went home, took the car and drove to dpv to meet kevin and rong. made tiramisu, or rather, 'tiramisu', which was a fail. :( everything curdled! don't know why also. tried to study. but i was so tired. talked to people on msn and bbm and fb. then they played some game on ps3. played with the cats, mostly lenny because luna was hiding in the room, leo is scary, and lara wasn't around that much either. rong taught kevin to use her minolta. :) he bought an ae-1. the whole world wants ae-1s now, so ex! i love my ae-1. ;p
resolve.
etsy emails don't seem very relevant without a credit card haha. zzz.
but it's the end of the world, so really. what is relevant?
am rather disappointed that i have no more breaks during the year, because i would very much like to go on one of those trips! :\
and pleaseee come to tioman with meeee!
I NEED TO WAKE UP AT 9AM. 5 HOURS OF SLEEP HERE I COME.
5:56 am
20110312
and maybe
the landslide will bring you down
drove to town to meet kevin, rong, and caleb. Rango! thought the show wasn't bad.. just that.. :/
anyway. we might be making tiramisu tomorrow night. can't really help those thoughts right? not really within one's control i guess. i think?
too tired to do leg lifts even though it's my own bed tonight. my mother said i can bring her exercise mat to jb haha.
eleven journal articles to read. should probably sleep now haha.
oh kevin and i had durian puree too! ♥ so good. though it's so heaty haha. he tried to teach me some indon, but some words are different from malay, so. roadblock on the way home, waste my time only. i bet they only stopped us 'cause we looked young haha. ;p
i keep thinking about necrotising fasciitis. and huge breast carcinomas. nightmares.
hope i'm tired enough to sleep through what's left of tonight.
4:57 am
20110311
i took my love and i took it down
i climbed a mountain and i turned around
and i saw my reflection in the snow-covered hills
well a landslide brought me down
and i saw my reflection in the snow-covered hills
well a landslide brought me down
oh mirror in the sky, what is love
can the child within my heart rise above
can i sail through the changing ocean tides
can i handle the seasons of my life
well i've been afraid of changing 'cause i've
built my life around you
but time makes you bolder
even children get older
and i'm getting older too
11:13 pm
home again! feels like i've come back to civilisation! even though a monkey just stole my kinder bueno. -.- collected my photos on the way home too. though it was a rather half-hearted roll heh.
SECOND THOUGHTS. i really don't know what's good for me.
8:07 pm
20110310
I am always hiding in my room at night.. :/ but i don't really care?
Talked to the scary supervisor today! Apparently he makes girls cry so they don't assign girls to him. :/ i didn't know it was him till after! He offered me food though haha. And told me to work in melb.
Ward rounds and scopes. So inhumane that they do upper GI scopes without sedation here. I mean they get some midazolam and some pethidine but they are still fully awake and gagging throughout the procedure. Please don't come to msia for a scope.
Had to be a translator today haha. I need to learn medical chinese. And malay zzz.
Met the chancellor and pro-vice chancellor. Had a feedback session. Some of the 3rd years here have bedside tute groups of 15 people. What? Mine was like 4! As it should be..
Packed to go home. ;p watched Hot in Cleveland and studied. Watched a lot of episodes but also studied more than my current usual, so.. Will have to try to catch up during the weekend, though it looks like there's only sat before church heh. Hope i can still drive my uncle's car. ;p
Said yes to tioman, hope KL isn't meant to be on the same weekend! :/ itching to take some photos again.. Need to bring my camera the next time.
Also going to pack in case they want to shuffle rooms this weekend. :| though i figured out how to have a hot shower in my toilet haha. And i don't know why my mother only gave me a travel pack of tissues. One night left and i've already finished it!
Btw yurong it's not roaming! I don't have roaming enabled so i'm just using actual starhub reception i can get from across the strait. ;p much more economical haha.
Yay tiramisu, red riding hood, and paradise!
11:40 pm
20110309
woke up 3 times last night. an improvement!
went for morning rounds, then clinic with the third years, who had to take turns interpreting for me. ;p had lunch and went to the clinical school to study a bit before the bedside tute.
the bedside tutor was this guy from myanmar, and i couldn't make out half the words he said! but thankfully i was able to understand most of it. jw and i just kept laughing haha. iceberg.
took as taxi to city square after the tute to ask the people about the modem. the guy said it doesn't work on macs! :( sian. but i bought a bag haha. and a slice of chocolate banana cake! :) but then i took a blue cab back and it cost rm16! the red taxi there only cost rm6.10! and the uncle said there's no peak hour surcharge some more. will not take any more blue taxis!
finally found the study guide and the modules. should start doing them. need to find english-speaking patients to pounce on haha.
two days to go. tomorrow should be a short day because the vice chancellor is coming so the afternoon's taken up. and the morning will just be rounds and theatre. and then i'm coming back on fri afternoon! :)
apparently gary is somewhere around but i haven't seen him yet. someone told me east 5 but everytime i go there he isn't around!
9:23 pm
hellooooo
my usb modem thing doesnt work. :( so i'm blogging on my bb!
every day in hospital i keep looking out the window across the sea! wish i could be in sg instead. so near yet so far..
i think everyone should come over and see what the hospital is like though. then they won't complain so much.
so every day by noon i am covered in sweat. a lot of walking. in the clinic, 3 consultations take place concurrently in a room the size of a doctor's consulting room in melb. ward rounds in the morning consist of 15+ people. and for some reason they have to repeat the rounds in the afternoon.
our person in charge brought us out for dinner at a pasar malam tonight. :) she's very nice. and we kept having to explain things to the ang mohs haha. we may have to shuffle our rooms at some point but for now i'm quite happy having the masterbedroom to myself even though there isn't really any hot water.
biggest problem is sleeping. there isn't a fan so i have to use the aircon, which kills my nose. and i have been waking up intermittently during the night. last night i woke up 7 times before the alarm rang! so i'm always tired..
may need to go to city square to ask the guy about the internet.. should have brought it out just now but oh well. am glad that i can still use the internet on my bb. :)
two down, three to go! at least school is fulfilling its purpose of occupying my mind so i don't think so much..
12:38 am
20110306
JUMP DOWN/ SAFE PLACES
drove round a lot before finding legal free parking at the botanics. -.- then walked all the way across to the other end haha. the real swan lake. ;p picnic with nine, full turn out! plus laimeng and soyboy. :) christmas dinner replacement leh. though sebas kept exclaiming that he hated picnics and that the next time we meet we should eat at a table. a lot of alcohol was spilt. uneven floor. taboo! 32:26.
climbed the tree! kevin kept competing with two little jap girls haha. and i was shaking. so scary lor. and we had a big audience haha. i think they were amused by how long we took to all get up there. ;p they did it so effortlessly after us haha. anyway, love! :)
climbed the tree! kevin kept competing with two little jap girls haha. and i was shaking. so scary lor. and we had a big audience haha. i think they were amused by how long we took to all get up there. ;p they did it so effortlessly after us haha. anyway, love! :)leo has no scarf now because i gave it to snobs! because i was too lazy to knit a new one haha. but that scarf traveled to spain lor. ;p
drove home and left for church almost immediately. dropped my brother off at safra for a birthday party, then went to church nearly an hour early to queue. -.- oh happy day..
waiting for my hair to grow out.
oh and i finished my AE-1 film. and my spinner roll too, though i'm not entirely sure what happened at the end. :\ we'll see when i eventually have it developed.. though i'm not sure when. next weekend maybe? though the nine photo is in the new spinner roll so i probably won't get to see that till months from now haha.
so tired. can't believe i'm leaving tomorrow either. or that school is starting in one day. :| AND I STILL HAVEN'T FINISHED PACKING. zzz.
oh yes. went to town after dinner with the family and church/SOT people. plankton, plantain? kevin got a lot for me haha. after i drove one round and started freaking out because there were none. ;p i still don't like driving to town. went to watch Unknown at the cathay. thought it was good despite that part of the plot.. though it was scary. but not as bad as black swan haha. sent him home after. heart to hearts.
also drove more at 80+ rather than 70+ today. stepping on the accelerator in my uncle's car doesn't make it feel like the car is dying haha. makes me dislike driving the van more..
and my phone was being annoying today. till i restarted it. and the fb messages are always weird. rong are you reconsidering! ;p
interesting fb message from someone unexpected.
"It always feels like there is just one person in this world to love, and then you find somebody else. And then, it just seems crazy that you were ever worried in the first place."
goodbye singaporeee. for six days! ;p
3:46 am
20110305
还记得你说家是唯一的城堡
I FEEL TOO OLD FOR LATE NIGHTS. and omg it isn't even really late. D: but i think i shall blame it on the interrupted sleep i've been having. :x much like the days when i just came back from melbourne..
suddenly realised that i have to wake up in time to send my brother for tuition. but i think it's only at 10..? and i'm pretty sure i'll wake up at 6+ again..
my legs are so tired from the ridiculous amount of walking we did today. including climbing six flights of stairs at lorong chuan omg. but kevin was crazier, he climbed the entire thirteen flights of stairs at bishan haha. siao.
went to IMM in the late morning with my mother to get stuff for jb and to have lunch. bought random things from daiso, including things to stretch my toms haha. yeay. :) then we went to dover to fetch my brother. it started raining like mad and i ended up being the one driving home.. i hate driving in singapore rain.
came home and left not long after. met kevin in town and we went to the 313 coffee bean to study/ do my door hanger. :) yeah i lugged a textbook around everywhere and hardly even got any studying done.. :\
watched Gnomeo and Juliet, which was okay.. i liked the italian flamingo. ;p had popcorn for dinner. then we went to taka to get chips and something from art friend. and then to bishan to do my returning of borrowed items. where kevin climbed the thirteen flights of stairs, siao.
then it was the whole mess of trying to get to serangoon gardens. got lost in lorong chuan. i hate serangoon gardens. i used to hate going there and i will always hate going there. unless of course there's a car involved. public transport there is rubbish.
eventually found our way to 一碗甜品. ordered a durian mousse and an aiyu mango. not niceeee! 记得吃 much much much better. the durian puree had a weird aftertaste. and the aiyu mango was dilute and the jelly wasn't nice. and the place so hard to get to omg. though i wondered why people were complaining about the stairs, it was only on the second floor what. so lazy.
worried about my scraping being stolen.
LIES. (just realised this is so sebas)
anyway. took 317 back to serangoon central, then took 105 from the interchange. it feels like forever since we used to go to ren's house. and then there was also church. forever ago. transited at holland but missed all my buses. thankfully the next bus that came was 75 so i didn't have to walk more. was amused by the fact that the bus driver drove like ian..
contact dermatitis on the back of my leg. go away please.
this is what happens when people know you too well. but even so, you are being a *. on that note, i really should make day 1s actual day 1s.
re-issue of MEDIV EOY results! i don't think i have my old ones haha so i can't tell the difference anyway.. though it seems more obvious to me this time that i passed haha. ;p i still haven't figured out the Allocate+ stuff ahhhh. D:
2:56 am
20110304
as i was walking home from the jjk bus stop listening to music, i suddenly realised that i'm going to miss this feeling.. feeling safe walking alone outside at 11+pm listening to music. i don't think i'll even dare to step out of the apartment in jb after sunset haha. :x and even here i still look back once in a while because i'm so paranoid. :3
gu zheh came to visit. well, gu por i suppose.
went to alter my jeggings in the pouring rain. but it lightened up after we left the green market and stopped by the time we went to ac to pick my sister up. took 970 to valley point to meet kevin, saw sebas while still on the bus.. got new shows from kevin! :)
coffee bean for yoghurt and malibu. they have never made green tea yoghurt before today! they finally got it right on the third try haha. contemplated watching Gnomeo and Juliet but the coin said no. did the birthday card instead.. rather haphazardly because we don't really know her..
my legs are tired from all the walking and standing. and i'm also really tired in general from waking up early every day for no reason..
2:02 am
20110303
biblioteka
have been packing.. usually i hate it, but today it felt good. to be going away.. for a while. in a way i can't wait to go back to melb too. it's like a different reality, ha. sadly, my old suitcase is falling apart. :( but i think i can still bring it to jb since i'll only use it on the way there and back. country road for weekend trips home. :)
watched Ramona and Beezus. attempting to dl modern family nowww. i think the internet has been slow for a week zzz. at least i can still klove now.
so annoying trying to give the jb person a scanned copy of my passport photo. actual size also too small zzz.
according to google maps it will take about 35 mins to walk from the hospital to the causeway haha. there is no public transport? so lousyyy.
3:05 pm
oh the irony-
hope rong is free tonight. and tomorrow. and sat. :| duck rice, Unknown, teppanyaki, pignick with kites. i think i am being too demanding haha. jiayou with your megasubmission! :)
i realise that i'm running out of time.. not in relation to school. not many days left... (squirms uncomfortably) i really hate doing this. but i should probably just get it over and done with. just that we are so different and i think it is likely to be torture. :x
on another note, i had a strange dream last night. i had the same dream before, just that this time it was happening to her. though it felt more like it was happening to us. interestingly i didn't wake up thinking that it was real.
the 5+am spell has been broken anyway. though i still get up randomly at 6+. wish it would just break itself already.
need to remember to do the hku stuff. :| soon, if not i might not get to go to hk at all. :x
the sun is actually shining today. well, now. will see if i can find it in myself to go over and swim later if it's still sunny. even leg lifts are a drag now..
don't be bullied!
11:31 am
20110301
i'm back! ..not that i went anywhere.
friday
- yong tau foo with cheryl and lois in nus
- met rong also, she asked me to shout linda very loudly
- dinner with ian at dtf in j8, met gabriel haha
- whatsapped kevin who tried to keep me alive from indo (he was afraid i would stay out too late and get attacked by banglas)
saturday
- my grandmother got a huge second degree burn on her thigh :(
- went to church with the family, chc is moving out of the expo
- ringing in my ears after the service as always
- dinner at like 9pm
- postponed moscato with kevin and rong because i was too tired from waking up so many times during the night
sunday
- didn't feel at all like a sunday
- had laksa steamboat!
- went shopping at vivo (sort of)
- daniel called to offer his condolences (i forgot if this was sat or sun)
- went to dpv, kevin got us moscato d' asti (which was awesome) and maoshanwang (which was also awesome) :D
- checked out the function room, though we couldn't really figure out which one it was
- castles again, obstacle course! ;p but it's like 14m long haha
monday
- stayed home the whole day
- stupid internet still not working
- did not think
- rewatched shows
- added stuff to the moleskine
- continued contemplating getting that intern bag but trying to figure out how to pay for it since i don't have my cba credit card anymore and i doubt my mother would let me use hers
tuesday
- realised that i have been waking up at 5+ every morning since sat
- trying to figure how that will ever happen
- realised that it's the first time i have ever started the semester later than everyone else!
- but then i have 36 weeks with no break so
- going to check out public holidays in malaysia ;p
so far, so good.
12:49 pm