bad obstetric day~

today...is a bad bad day...

went in to labour room at 645am but no patients!!...i repeat again no patients...

then around 8 plus only there's patients coming in....

two major deliveries that were not so good..

1) the first time mother haf a very poor maternal effort...she push a while, then stop a while...so the baby head goes in and out so many times..but after about 20minutes of pushing, she finally made it...it was a baby boy but the baby....hmmm, requires oxygen cause was not crying properly...

2)this is the major major one...happened to a single mother...she was only 21 year old and she was not complaining of any pain at all..when i reach to her, she was struggling wif her legs, and i saw she's bleeding per vaginally....we were trying to get the fetal heart rate which was very low...i asked her is it the bleeding very long ago?..she answered me it was since morning...and js tat timed a staff nurse and a doctor came...and thy saw it's something not right...so they opened up and see the baby's head was almost out....faster put her on labour...then, her baby was out..it was a baby boy...but after the cord is being clamped, the baby was stil not crying..not moving...everythin not!!...i was too shocked, i did the suction as quickly but my hands were shivering i noe...faster we put the baby on the warmer, put on oxygen and do resuscitation for the baby....the baby was not responding at all!!...i repeat not responding at all!!!...my tears almost fell down..but the mother sadly to say, she was not unhappy o watsoever...she can even smile and she didnt even asked how was d baby...

*maybe wat maslina said was oso true...tis single mother would rather her child was born dead and wont gif a damn to it...i felt it was cruel but came to tink of it again..it was good for the baby itself...for he no need to grow up in the orphanage...but...haizzz..*

js now whn i haf my afternoon nap, i kept dreaming of the labour room's condition..how ppl deliver...it ingrain too deep into me d i guess...

-pnee~

Depressed Weekend!!

a bad bad weekend..

i guess my bad omen has not over yet!!!...

yesterday, after fishing wif hay at limbongan, his car was being broken in...the window at the behind left seat was being broken in...

things that were stolen:...
1)my blue back pack...which contains of a lot of my valuable and precious things... my wallet(gift from dajerk for years tat had accompanied me)-including ic, license, atm, money...my earrings box which contains all these yrs earrings and my 916 gold love bangle!!...my spectacles...my fav jeans n short pants, my undergarments!!...my old old nokia handphone!!...all my precious~
2)newly received couple watch from hay's mom...now left mine-his one was stolen:(
3)hay's handcuff...
4)hay's old handphone...

tat fella is a stupid freak!!...i just cant take it anymore..why is all these keep coming to me..

i noe is my fault for putting the bag in the car plus it was in front..making it obvious rather than his behind was fully tinted dark...i felt very bad, sad... when his mom said,"u're reli a trouble maker" tho she didnt reli mean it...i guessed tat his whole family will tink tat cause i always bring him troubles...whn i drove his car, i banged the front part(twice somemore).....hmm, evn tho hay said it's okie js forget about it...i stil feel very bad...everytime new thing will happen...and it was not once nor twice...tis morning i tot if i were to leave him, prob it will be better for him rite?....

depressed pnee~:'(

PreGnaNT~

feelings the kicks of the baby in the stomach...i've been wondering how it feels like to haf a small lil creature in u...dont they sound like an alien that invade n crept into the body...and if it's born thru vagina then wouldnt it be like some alien cropping out of ur body?or if thru caesarean wouldnt it be sounds like bringing out an alien from the body??

it's so miracle how life was made...

recently i loved seeing and hearing babies cries..they haf different cries which indicates particular meaning...i loved to guess wat they always trying to say when they started to cry or just stare at u quietly...

back to mommy...all i noe is delivery is super duper pain...how could another one understand how pain it is when they've never gone thru it?how on earth can a dr ask the patient to be relax when she's in deep pain?how she/he could understd a mom's pain whn they nv gone thru any??...why on earth thy're ppl who acted tat thy are experts in dealing wif babies and post partum care?...haizz....

but i do feel it's reli a miracle and a gift from god that u can haf a small lil creatures in u for the 9months...altho it's tough and painful but it worth a thousands...(if only the child is wat u're expecting~) but i feel pregnant mom is super SEXY~:P

teenage pregnancy~....hmmm, i saw a single mom who is only 17years old today...she was SINGLE...the very fact tat i cant accept it is tat why is the guy so irresponsible and not why is she pregnant at tis age...i dun mind if it's teenage pregnancy but if it's single...wtf is tat guy doin??the baby has to refer to social welfare...so sad rite?

another surprising case...a mom who is hmm 18 years old...can u imagine tat she was a divorced and now she's a mom to the second husband??....18 years old; two husbands!!....she was married for 7months and divorced, after 2 months of divorced, she got to know the second husband and they got married 5 months later!!....

everything is possible in tis beautiful scary world~

pnee~

Emo song~

awww.....too touching...EMO again~...

Day 1 Obs~

off i haf to wave goodbye to all the kids~~

then pregnant mommy, here i come...first day in obstetric ward was my major disaster!!...

1) i cant hear the fetal heart beat using pinard(a small cone thingy tat put on mommy's stomach to hear the fetal's heart beat)...*so frust tat i cant hear at first*...but before i leave the ward, i managed to hear two~....

2)i cant felt the contraction on the mommy's stomach...at the end of the day, i still cant felt~~ cant cant n cant....

3)i made a house officer being scolded by a medical officer...heeeEEee...so in the end i put up all my courage to say sorry to her...she was shocked to hear it from me; she told me it's ok and it's not my fault....
wat happened is tat...i wrote on the observation chart tat she had noted tat thr's a mom's blood pressure was high after caessarean...but she did not input anything in her notes...so the medical officer scolded her tat, if tmr thr's anything happend to the patient ur head wil be on d choppin board and it's js because "dr gan noted"...i felt bad for writting it...so i told her...tho my fren said it's okie as i'm doin my job....
so HAIZZ...

4) i was being scolded by a staff nurse!!...i dont understd !!!ish!!
there's tis baby who cant feed on her mom's milk...and he was crying and crying...so the staff nurse say js give the baby formula milk instead...but the formula milk took more than half an hour to arrive and the baby cried all the while...thn the family member said tat the baby is oso thirsty plus hungry...so wat came thru my mind was prob can give few sips of water using spoon to the baby...so the family member give few drops of water using the spoon...suddenly the staff nurse came over and shouted!!....she said no giving water to the baby as will cause the baby to chocked and baby will turn blue...then later the baby will haf infection to the lung...at tat moment i wasnt thinking...i kept quiet~...then whn i came to tink again, they're giving the baby formula milk and it's using syringe and sometimes cup feeding...wouldnt the baby chocked as well??...
okie, prob too much of water may cause harm to the baby....but her explanation makes me super frust about everything!!...

hopefully today will be a better day...

-pnee~

Madagascar 2!!

i just came back frm cinema after the movie "Madagascar 2"~~...


yo, as i expected din disappoint me at all..it was a great comedy cartoon!!...superb cuteee....

i would rate it 8.5/10~

Secondhand Serenade:)

currently...i'm fell in love wif secondhand serenade's songs...long time din hear group like them, songs wif beautiful meaning and beats~

plus thanks to keat how for recommending d mtv (fan made) of "Your Call"...superb sweet...makes me falling even more in love wif it~...arghh....

yet, i still love "Fall For U" more~~

loves,pnee~

Wonders of Life~

haf u ever tot of getting into a stable relationship...thn married...starting on a new family on ur own?...

haf u ever tot of becoming someone's parent?...

these days during my posting in paeds ward, it reli makes me wonder a million...how many pregnancy will turn out to be a successful one?...i saw lots of unsuccessful babies wif multiple problems..some js dun like staying in their mom's womb, therefore coming out earlier than expected..*pre term babies*....we always heard tat pre-term babies are smart...but do u noe tat they are struggling every second in their life..their every second is like hours while the days are like years to them..coming into tis world wif malformation is not wat they want nor wat the parents want...the small lill creature fight wif all their might to survive..not easy, reli not easy!!...thy are reli too fragile...depending on every single thing which are super huge to them for survival...

seeing how each parents accepting their newborn is reli an eye opening...some js can accept it but some just couldnt and even would abandon their babies....this is how some abandon babies come abt...prob they js cant accept the newborn wif so many probs....all these nv came across their mind...

so before getting pregnant...plan and plan first!!...important!!!... most things to do for both mom n dad...
1)healthy diet... which means no fast food!!
2)healthy lifestyle....no smoking...(mutate all the genes...leads to chromosomal defects!)
3)follow up wif check ups!!...

AND

haf u came across in ur mind if you are unable to conceive when ur partner want a baby so much??....is not easy, when u cant satisfy ur loved one's needs u will always felt there's some things missing in life....
for girls...if unable to conceive, there's always a thing call in-vitro fertilisation(IVF)...or many other opt to take...so dun be disappointed...and guys dun gif up on ur wife...u marry her not barely to make babies only, you marry her because u love her and want to spend ur whole life wif her...there's lots of other means in gaining happiness!!
for guys...dun worry your gal will understd u...there's always a thing call sperm bank or...adoption...

PLUS

why i dun see any borders when i'm wif those babies?...when i'm changing diapers for them, i can js forget to wear gloves! but not to adults...prob they're confirm disease free...but the dirty thingy are stil there and the same...miracle,i js dun understd myself...thy too cute for me to be mean to them i guess...but i guess babies are great!...i'm loving them more..

pnee~

spoilt!

laptop spoilt~.........

why??....suddenly, i mean out of sudden!!...cant detect wireless!!....

then??....send to repair which takes more than 2 days!!!....stupid rite??

now??....using room mate's laptop!....

cant believe my 99th post will abt my laptop....depressing!...not good thing abt my laptop but it's a bad thing...

bad luck are js on my way now!!...are those bad omens?...is it due to halloween?...but it passed ad...pls...shu shu away...i duwan u~

depressed,pnee~