today's pcgm convicted me n spoke to me in some ways. didnt share much just now but guess i'll share it here... first we shared abt something interesting that we have done this week. did a lot of things actually. baked brownies for the first time, went to night safari which was a whole lot of fun, played good hockey matches for once, cheorographed some steps for cheerleading, fell sick, and met up with my dear fren dawn who used to live next to me in hall. too many things. that even the severity of the tsunami calamity didnt affect me very much. when wendy asked us to share abt our thoughts after this incident, i realized that i didnt think very much abt it! i just dismissed it as... ahh, not another one...!!! was pretty angry with myself, convicted i guess. cos i realized, i have been putting too much emphasis on my life. my activities. my problems. i did not realize that wat other ppl are experiencing is far worst than wat i'm facing rite now. many of the ppl who died cos of e tsunami prob did not even have the privilege to even hear about Jesus our Saviour. then tiffy shared abt how she feels angry that ppl who have so many chances to hear God's word and yet refuse to accept the ONE that gave up his son for us. maybe cos they are afraid to change? to give up their worldly lives for him? i admit its difficult, have many friends who are like that. but i pray the Holy Spirit will convict them somehow. and that i will continue to do my best to share the gospel... thats one new year's resolution there! wendy said sth which also struck me, to live life carefully. not carelessly. i clearly remember myself grumbling that i have to go for hockey training n cheerleading practices. complaining of all the committee meetings i have to attend. then i got reminded today that where i am right now, where god has placed me, is what i should be so thankful of. i shdnt be taking for granted wat i have! another new year resolution: not to complain so much and learn to be a true living testimony wherever God has placed me. yyup thats abt it. there's cheerleading rehearsal n dnd meeting tmr... plus i'm down with a flu n slight fever. pray i'll be fine after a good rest tonight!
i've decided to give up some things which are impt to me, i may have held on too tightly b4. but i believe in his faithfulness, all things are possible. but in His time. :)

its been an enjoyable xmas! thank God for speaking to me in his own special way. i now know for sure. HE has to be a man of God.

Your Dominant Intelligence is Interpersonal Intelligence

You shine in your ability to realate to and understand others. Good at seeing others' points of view, you get how people think and feel. You have an uncanny ability to sense true feelings, intentions, and motivations. A natural born leader, you are great at teaching and mediating conflict. You would make a good counselor, salesperson, politician, or business person.

What Kind of Intelligence Do You Have?

i thought the message abt peace by reverand escobar today was powerful. and funny. haha he's sucha hilarious pastor. there was sth that he said which really touched me... about not to get upset over anything, to have God's peace in our hearts cos He's always with us. not to get offended by how others treat us. we offend God everyday, we do things that is against His will. yet He still loves us, yet He still forgives us and tells us its ok. God's grace and mercy is amazing. yup... God is the way the truth and the light!

quite upset over my results. actually i was expecting the kind of grades that i got. guess i was secretly hoping n praying for some kind of miracle. but then i was reminded that God only helps those who help themselves first. sigh. must definitely put in more effort nxt semester. n must learn to thank God in all circumstances.

better than the riches of this world, better than the sound of my friends' voices, better than the bigggest dreams of my heart. that's just the start. better than getting what i say i need, better than living the life that i want to, better than the love anyone could give... your love is. love this song... came home that day feeling tired and slightly messed up. but singing along with this song on my bro's cd player just somehow lifted my spirits. you hold me now in your arms and never let me go. you oh Lord make the sunshine, the moonlight in the nightsky. you give me breath and all your love. i give my heart to you. i cant stop falling in love with you. i'll never stop falling in love with you! yeah God's love is amazing. yeah?!
xiuhui called me all the way from notts on tuesday and i was like XIUHUI!!!!!! without her arnd, one less shopping partner! and one less person to listen to my nonsense.
we're dancing to my best friend again this sat for the escobar evangelistic service this saturday night. think it will be pretty cool and thank God for the opportunity. joel! if u do chance upon my blog.. which i think is so unlikely since dear joel is somewhere in vietnam? where are you when we need you to dance with us?!
cheerleading trainings in hall have been pretty scary. imagine being lifted and thrown arnd by guys. haha ok la its been quite fun trying something different.
going with candice for some ballet class later... yay. have not danced ballet in super long. am so not flexible now! but i'm still excited!

church camp in a few days. pretty excited, pray that God's works will be done in the lives of the campers. n also for myself... think this camp is going to be a challenging but exciting experience for me!

i'm feeling fat. UGH.

watched 2 movies this week, princess diaries and shutter. whoa both are the exact opposite from each other. n i definitely prefer the happier feel good kind haha. was grabbing on to candice the whole time during shutter and practically stuffing my face into her neck, while she covered her face like 3/4 of e whole show. super tense n tiring watching this kind of spooky movies. but spookiness aside, i thought the plot is pretty good. there's hardly any scary show with an interesting plot ya. nxt movie i wanna watch will be ocean's twelve! good looking cast there...

You Are the Enthusiast

7 You are outgoing and playful - always seeing the happy side to life. You're enthusiastic and excitable. You love anything new. Multi-talented, you do many things well... and find success easy. You prefer to keep things light with others. Opening up is hard for you.

What number are you?

got this from one of siyi's posts. heheeh. pretty interesting.

i just got reminded that u cant trust the things of the world no matter how reliable they seem. friends, promises, wateva. only God is eternal. only Him will never change. only His love will truly be unconditional. only to Him can i give my whole self to. to none other i can.

You're a lollipop!! You're known for your coolness,
for you are a trend setter. You're a natural
leader, and are good under pressure. People
often seek you out for advice, for you have
great insight.

Which kind of candy are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

exams over! been one long month of studying. praise God for his grace during this period will not have pulled thru it alone. God is really so good u noe! He still accepts me the way i am despite all the things i do that disappoint Him. no one really can do that but God.

anyw i'm super excited! shopping, zoo, movies, church camp, drving lessons, hopefully passing my driving test... n more shopping! hehehehe. thinking of taking up pilate classes. hmmm need to find a good and not to ex dance center first. got a lot of hall things to settle also. just had a cultural sub comm meeting on sunday. we have to start piaing for dance already! its super stress lor trying to come up with steps and formations. really not an easy task now i respect those ppl in scgs n njc who came up with all did all these. i was like one of those slackers who just learnt wat i was supposed to and did wat i was told. never used any of my creative juices or watever abilities a dance teacher is supposed to have. then later tonight there's dnd meeting. gotta type minutes again! never be a secretary its a tough tough job!

there's this nagging feeling in my heart. about my priorities. choices to make. i think i know wat to do. i just need the courage.

IT paper tmr. IT sucks man. hate IT. like who the hell wants to learn abt data packets carry data thru different routes in a connectionless vacuum-like space to its final destination. n there's more. different network classifications, PAN, LAN, MAN, WAN blah blah. ok. LAN stands for Local Area Network. No prizes for guessing wat the rest stand for. ugh God pls help me.

am i a fool to think its possible to change someone?

i dun wanna think abt it. but i just cant help myself.

dilemmas.. i hate them... i know God is in control. yet i feel so lost at wat to do. doesnt help that exams are arnd the corner. well actually in 2 days time! ahh! Lord, i thank you for the hope u have given me... despite the helplessness i feel, despite me screwing myself up altogether. i know that all will work out according to your purpose.

If we died with him, we will also live with him;
If we endure, we will also reign with him.
If we disown him, he will also disown us;
If we are faithless, he will remain faithful,
For he cannot disown himself.

hey... so many things have been happening. there's just SO much to update everyone about! but first i wanna say a very big THANK YOU to ichee for your wonderful birthday gift. i really really REALLY like it! it simply made my day when xj gave it to me u shd ask her haha. also to the rest who celebrated my birthday, which was abt 2 weeks ago. to my hall 4 mates who made me drink and got me high... luckily i managed to escape nanyang lake! thanks Candice, best roomie in the world. to Xiaojing's tutorial groupmates who really surprised me after that with their mini-celebration for both of us (for those who dun know xj's bday is one day after mine!). thanks Kevin and Wei Yeh for the cute piglet, thanks to my dear church friends who gave me flowers and a good book, thanks Gabe for the CD. and also to e rest... u all really blessed me and it was truly memorable.

well wat happened after that was not so memorable... came down with food poisoning on wed... kept vommitting, kept having diarrheoa, kept lying in bed and sleeping and i simply could not get well. but really thank all my friends who brought me to e doc, helped me to buy food, make drinks, came to visit me to make me feel better. thank parents for looking after me. thank God for His comforting presence and strength which i could rely on. haha i sound like someone who just received an award.. keep on thanking ppl. well i recovered fully on monday... praise God for that.

exams gonna start within the next 4 weeks. so fast! project datelines coming soon so trying to rush tutorials n everything at e same time... euphoria is on e coming monday. quite excited abt it. its sorta like our hall 4 anniversary, so there's gonna be a steamboat dinner and small performance. he few of us from dance are gonna perform so hope it goes well!

i thank God for letting me learn this lesson... not to be judgemental. not to have so much pride in myself. not to keep putting myself first. need to keep on reminding myself that where i am today is not by my own strength, but my God's grace and power. i've learnt not to distance myself from ppl who do not seem like the 'kind' of friends that i usually have. realized thru this that that person could be very nice n friendly. he or she could even be a fellow brother or sister in Christ. after all it is God that created all of us... in his image. we are all equal to him...

as u can see in my blog, i lost my all my links! will do it up properly when i find e time. for now, gotta rush off for business law tutorial...

its been more than one week since Xiuhui left... n i really miss her! miss our shopping trips, telephone conversations, just hanging out together with the restof ichee. hey girl... if u do come across my blog do leave a note ya? n do update ur blog when u're free. went shopping with Candice during the hols last week, n i spent about 150 bucks all at once. but me n Candice promised each other not to go for big shopping sprees like this till exams are over! haha. exams coming up in another one month plus. so fast! time flies man. n i still feel as if i have not really settled down into university life yet.... well... must perservere! to all out there sitting for exams... final yr, promos, O and A levels... jia you!

its been a long time since i posted here, have been really busy with school work and hall activities. a lot of times ppl ask whether i've made the right decision to stay in hall, whether its worth all my time n energy... sometimes i even wonder to myself... however i m beginning to see that thru all these i have learnt a lot about myself and about others. i have learnt more about God, and how He provides comfort and grace through all difficulties n struggles. it has been difficult for me. for most of my life, i have always been sheltered by ppl close to me, namely my dad and mom. i always had them to look to for instruction, for advice. now i am learning to rely on myself... and more importantly on God's guiding hand. i'm so thankful that God had placed me in the hall i'm in, and also for the friends i've made. i thank God for Candice as a roomie... that we are able to understand each other and compromise according to our preferences. also for Shuyan... a fellow sister in Christ. i pray we'll continue to pray with each other in faith and support one another thru Him. i'm thankful too for the non-christian friends i have made... i pray too that God will be able to touch their lives thru me. this coming week is the holiday week for NTU... almost everyday is packed with something to attend to... projects and meetings. struggling to manage my time properly... sometimes i just waste time doing unimportant things. or spend so much time on less important things. really need God's wisdom...

hall camp was interesting. i experienced things i never did b4 and many ups n downs as well. the ppl there were mostly of a diff culture from wat i've been opened to in my previous schools. so it was pretty difficult to fit in in the beginning. but i thank God that the games we played helped us to bond. though some of the games were too interactive. far more than wat i'd have liked. after experiencing hall life for 1 week, i realize that it is very hard to stay focused on God. most of e the ppl in my hall tend to get carried away while having fun n i feel i might just be pulled into all this. its really a spiritual struggle for me. feel as if i'm in some state of emotional confusion right now. but that doesnt mean i dint enjoy e camp. i really did! there were really interesting games, pool games, sea games, even shi zhi lu kou, amazing race and secret pal. it was great to meet new ppl in the hall and establish more friendships. i miss the peace n privacy i get in my house, yet i'm excited abt the freedom n independence i'll get frm staying in hall. sigh. just pray for me ya. thx.

the past few days have been sth like a mad rush for me. been rushing from appointment to appointment to activity and appointment again. but i just thank God for giving me strength. without God everything certainly wdnt be able to turn out so well. went for my last day of work on fri. well my boss was really nice when i told her i wdnt be able to commit time to work once sch starts. so she gave me 1 mth to sort out everything in sch and to give her a reply after that. my ans is prob gonna be no anyway but she was really sweet in giving me time to think abt it! at night i went down with my maid cherry and mom to move stuff into the hostel, and also to clean up e room. i think i'm so pampered. after wiping the table and cupboards i was SO tired! n bored as well. cherry had to do e rest for me, plus wiping everything all over again cos i dun trust my own cleaning! dunno how i'll survive hall life. sat was gabe's birthday so i met him for lunch. it was nice meeting him n just spending time with him. rushed down to church after that to prepare props n practice for our youth sunday mime. had an NTU CF bbq after that. it was kinda weird at first cos me n Jing just sat at e corner n talked to each other. we were quite anti-social actually i admit. but after that ppl started sitting arnd us n it was nice fellowship! played some silly games after that n laughed non-stop. haha it was hilarious!
Youth Sunday was awesome! everyone played a part n helped it to be so successful! the ushers, worship team ppl, choir, mime, thanksgiving album, the testimonies, sermon and youth booth. it was amazing to see God's work in the Youth Ministry. He has blessed us n i pray that the members of the YM will continue to grow in His word n truly be GEMs for God. watched Spiderman with Kristal n Eugene. the effects in the show are really good. Spiderman looked so cool flying from building to building. tho it started to look a bit unreal. plus the ending was kinda cheesy. but i love happy endings!
my hall camp orientation is starting this afternoon. mixed feelings about it. just pray that the Lord will sustain me thru.

i feel kinda sad to be leaving home to stay in the hostel. i'll really miss my family, my dog, my room and also my maid and her cooking. sigh. its just a really big transition for me... kinda excited abt the new environment and all but also scared. afraid that i'll change and become a person i dont like. i pray that everything will be ok.

anyways our dear xiuhui is gonna leave us for robin hood country soon so we're gonna have a farewell party for her. all from 02S14 in nj are welcome. if u're from 02S14 please confirm with me whether u can come. its on e 28th aug a sat. prob a pot luck party held at mad's house. sorry xh for announcing it here... hee. hope u dun mind.

yesterday was the first time i had dinner with 2 french, 1 russian, 2 indians, 1 british and another chinese, in a dark shophouse lit up with candles and soothing french music played in the background. all of us are ladies and work for the same boss. well it was an eye-opener for me and i enjoyed myself quite a bit actually. its ok mad, honestly i was quite angry u were not coming but now i'm fine with it. i glad u actually made me go. hehe. dinner was interesting too. salad with goat cheese and bread, shephard's pie, but not e usual one with beef and potato. this shephard's pie was made up of chicken, raisins, apricots etc and came in a flacky crust. n desert was some super sweet caramel cake thing. very impressive! think i drank abt 4 glasses of wine and when i stood up i felt as if i was floating. haha.
the day before was spent with the ichee members. it was great! these girls are the only ones that i can play silly games with and it was so fun. played the food game at the food fest held in taka square. then went karaoke after that. it was super hilarious. watching siyi and xiuhui going crazy as they sing. singing karaoke can be liberating in some sort of way too. really enjoy our times together. hope that as we go to uni we'll still be able to meet up.

the week ahead's gonna be a busy one. there's gonna be an ichee camp tmr. haha this 'camp' has been wonderfully planned by xiuhui and the rest and i'm so excited! we're gonna have a fun all girls outing tmr! plus there's also preparations for Youth Sunday. its the coming sunday and a group of us are putting up a mime for the church to watch. i'm helping out with e props and i need lotsa help! i'm especially in need of huge cardboard boxes! if anyone has pls contact me asap ya? thx. will be having dental checkup this week too. my dentist is gonna put springs in my mouth. have no idea wat that is n i'm kinda scared. and i also hafta study for my advanced theory driving test. its my second time taking it. i failed e first time sadly. luckily linus had e book of questions and notes to study from. anyways my stomach feel so bloated now. after lunch at dover with e church ppl we all felt full but greedy. ha. so we went down to swensens at holland v and each of us ordered a sundae! gosh. joel said i lost weight. haha but think i'm gonna put everything back on again looking at e rate i'm eating. n i heard there's gonna be an eating competition at ichee camp tmr. ahh. can i not take part? hehe.

the christian fellowhip orientation camp at NTU was great. i could really see God's work being done in the camp itself. blessing the whole group of us plus the China scholars who were non-christians and yet came down so willingly to learn more. i was truly blessed by this experience. i saw how all barriers were broken down, as ppl of different backgrounds, denominations, churches, JCs and polys fellowshipped willingly. everyone was so warm and genuine, with the true intention of getting to know more brothers and sisters in Christ. and also to provide support and care for each other thru our walk with Christ esp during our university lives where there are so many worldly temptations. i've learnt so much during this camp and it just reaffirms my faith that there is only one true God in the world and no other. there were talks on the book of Phillipians and workshops abt BGR and the different Christian denominations.
These are some things i learnt:

.with Jesus, we are able to experience joy and peace even times of trouble.

.God does not need us to do anything for him. as Christians we do not have to follow rules and regulations. this is not a religion, rather its a relationship with our loving God. thus we are obedient to Him in respond to his love for us.

.Nationality, race, denominations, churches should not be a barrier to us. we are all made equal by God and we are united through God's word and Spirit. We are all citizens of heaven.

wat really struck me was the passion some of the China scholars had to learn more about Christianity. they asked questions i've never really pondered about before. they were so enthusiastic and interactive during the camp activities. i felt kinda ashamed of myself and realized there's a lot of ppl out there who need God's word. if any of u reading this wanna know more, feel free to email me! i've made many wonderful friends thru this camp and i thank God for that. i also got to hear the experiences of seniors and graduates of my course accountancy and i am kinda mentally prepared now. i'm thinking stopping my part-time job as i do not want to be bogged down by other committments during uni. i got my letter too that i'm staying at hall 4 with candice and i'm thankful for that! its pretty near both our schools!

i'm just so thankful to all the ppl who've made e camp so enjoyable. it was truly a heartwarming experience.

i just read an entry in melissa's blog abt relationships and i feel so encouraged. its kinda like how i feel abt em right now. mel, hope u dont mind me linking it here. thx! anyway i'll be going for an NTU orientation camp by their christian fellowship group. dunno why but i feel quite apprehensive abt it. maybe cos i'm afraid i'll not like e ppl and all. i pray God will take these feelings away so i can go for e camp with an open heart. and meet more of God's children.

today was great! but super tiring. junie and michelle, my cousins from KL came to sgp for a hol, so i brought them arnd Orchard Road today. we walked from far east to centrepoint and stopped to eat along the way! and we really did eat a lot. pizza at pastamania, then cheese fries at KFC (they only have miserable cheese wedges in KL which are really lousy), stopped by taka food court for cheesecake, brownies, noodles and octopus balls! but that was not all. finally we went to marche to eat the rosti, calamari and caramel banna waffle with ice cream. yum. victor, my other cousin who lives in sgp came along too and it was great meeting them.

i thank God for being with me the past week. despite the struggles i've been facing i am still able to hold my head up and smile. i thank God for the assurance that everything will work out well, that so long as i put Him first He will bless me. and i can already see the numerous blessings that He has given me. i thank God for friends. friends who support me and cheer me up.

My japanese name is 藤原 Fujiwara (wisteria fields) 恵美 Emi (blessed with beauty).
Take your real japanese name generator! today!
Created with Rum and Monkey's Name Generator Generator.

You Are Right Brained In Love

Bit of a drama queen

Peacemaker, first to end a fight

Good at thinking up creative dates

Tend to fall in love and get hurt easily

Going with your gut instead of your head

Emphathetic and caring, sometimes to a fault

Good at recognizing patterns in relationships

Been in love many times, perhaps too many to count

Wildly passionate and intense when falling in love

Spontaneous with relationships, going with the flow

Overly visual - can play back past dates like movies in your mind

Roses, love poems, and stuffed animals are a good start to winning your heart




Are You Right Brained or Left Brained in Love? Take This Quiz :-)



Find the Love of Your Life
(and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

haha got this quiz from siyi's blog. i just came back from PCGM meeting at wendy's place. well today was more of a time of fellowship rather then a bible study, though i did learn some things from everyone who shared. thank God :) will be going ice skating with ichee tmr! yay! so exciting... hope i wont fall too many times. i rem the last time i went rollerblading, i fell twice on my bum n one on my face! ouch.

i cant seem to describe how i'm feeling rite now. i hate myself for doing this to both of us, yet i'm thankful for the courage God gave me. i dread the future, for i am afraid. yet i'm excited to let God reveal His plan to me. one of the toughest things to do is to wait. many times we rush into things we are not sure abt. we do things on impulse and end up regretting or doubtful. many ppl are not gonna understand why we're doing this cos i'm not gonna explain wat or why. but i hope that as my good friends, u'll support me.
i thank God for today. woke up really early cos i had to get to church by 715am. today was the sunday school's games day and some youths from our youth grp went along to help. i was one of them. at first i was kinda grumpy n not in a very good mood. but thankfully i started to lighten up after awhile. the children were having a great time playing e games and i was blessed thru this event. went back to church, had lunch with church friends. then kristal and eugene came over to my place, just to chill out and catch up with one another. we played with poker cards first. this mind-boggling game that eugene taught us. it involved mental sums! (go ask eugene urself i'm not gonna explain it here) then when we got tired of using too much of our brains, heh sounds bimbotic i know, we just talked abt our problems and how our lives have been. it was really a wonderful time of fellowship.
i know God will do something good for both u and me. i hope we can pull thru this period of testing and obedience to Him.

yesterday was great, met up with evelyn and went to the gym together. yes u didnt read wrongly, the gym!!! heh. its been a long time since i last worked out and it sure felt good. it was nice feeling the ache in my legs after that. hee. had dinner at clementi then went down to church for a prayer meeting. abt 8 of us turned up, and all of were saying thankful prayers to our Lord for bringing our mission trippers thru everything in cambodia. all went well over there, the weather was good, no one fell sick. and we were just singing songs of thanksgiving and praise to our dear Lord. had a great time of fellowship after that at dover. we were supposed to have supper but in the end none of us ate anything. except for the guys who ordered kaya toast. haha... the cambodia mission trippers will be coming back this afternoon and i'll most prob go welcome them back. anyone knows when mean girls opens? we initially wanted to watch today thinking tt its open liao. sigh maybe its good tt its not opened yet, can save $$ and spend more time at home...

ouch my newly tightened braces really make my teeth hurt. the dentist just explained to me the whole processed of how my teeth are gonna shift, n i'm definitely not excited! now there are 2 holes in my mouth at e positions where the 4th teeth from my 2 front teeth used to be. well he said tt the 3rd teeth are gonna shift in there and after tt the rest of my front teeth will shift backwards. understand? tt means i'm gonna have 2 very obvious holes in my mouth, where the 3rd teeth from e front originally was, within the next 6 mths or so. everytime i smile everyone's gonna see e holes! i just cant help feeling horrified.

new blog! wooo...well i just felt like starting another blog... heh. anyway here's a really nice song i wanna share with u:
I Am Carried
Day by day and hour by hour
Your love for me from heaven flows
Like streams of water in the desert, living waters flow
You walk beside me gently guiding,
Leading me through every storm.
Everlasting, never changing grace and love divine.

Mercy's healing, grace relieving
Every spot and every stain.
Forgiven freely, no more guilty
Love has conquered shame.
The broken mended, night has ended,
The lost and lonely lost no more.
For I am carrried in the arms of grace and love divine.

I am carried in the arms of grace and love divine.
I am held by hands of healing washed by waters pure.
Lifting up my heavy heart,
Held in grace-scarred hands.
I am carried in the arms of grace and love divine.

really touched me. hope u like it...