finally watched lost in translation last night. inspired some thoughts on the bus home.
one was the lack of sex between the two main characters. in a typical hollywood movie the two of them would have like had passioniate sex jus before the guy departs right. but there's no sex! (awww - i can jus imagine my army pals going)
but i think its more true. u develop feelings for someone... like him/her... doesnt mean dat u Have to have sex with him/her rite.
but its not jus the sex i thought about lah. it sorta led me to how feelings can easily develop between us hopelessly romantic human beings.
but its how far we allow these feelings between us to go dat really matters, isnt it? im sure we have all liked a certain friend at a certain point in time, but not done anything about it.
y?
perhaps we're jus not ready to decide who we want to spend the rest of our lives with jus yet.
perhaps our widened social circle has exposed us to too many people we think are desirable. so we cant make up our minds.
haha perhaps dat explains the increasing number of chronic singles who date and date and date, and Still remain single. and of course the lack of babies in singapore. :(

had a great day yesterday.
really great day.
did a lot of stuff i'd never tried before. and found dat tanglin mall has quite a number of interesting shops.
and i cant finish 2 pints of beer in 90 mins.
or beat pamela at pool.
:P

but seriously. i'd miss a friend, a girl, who i can like jus meet and have fun with and not hafta worry about anything else. besides having to watch my tongue and not say statements dat might imply anything i dun mean haha.

yeah, keep in regular contact yah? by phone or email or MSN.

i'll never forget my two sisters.

and wun mind another one, to be honest. heh

oh yeah. been wanting to write this for some time now. put it down in my notebook but didnt get a chance to publish it on my blog until now. back when i was doing fire piquet, in fact.

this post is dedicated to my dad. i love him.

Dad drove me to camp today. woke me up too at 550 in the morning.
we didnt talk much during the trip to camp, as usual. i remember all he said was, "So, will you be able to come back this evening?"
I said "no."
We've never said much to each other, you know. he's like fetched me to and back from school... bmt... safti... now nee soon... aside from a few monologues about performing well, giving my best and consoling me when i got out of course from ocs and was real depressed... not a lot, actually.
but i think i have the best dad in the world.
haha sounds like some 5-year-old's proclamation rite?
but how often do you think about it, think about all the things your parents have done for you and appreciate them? thank them for what they've done for us?
perhaps i'll never say this to him (too shy lah), or my mum, too, for that matter.
but i love them. i really do.

'tis been a Reeeeal weird day today.
this morning my sergeant talked to us about relationships. some relationships he had and why he's single now. haha. yeah oops we were supposed to be training heh. dun tell! ^_^
but yeah. dun really wanna repeat wat he said. but i feel most of wat he mentioned is damn true. about trust and stuff.
Then somehow the topic turned to transvestites at orchard towers and changi village.
damn out of point rite???

but dat was ok lah. watched a video on POCM. some casualty management thingy. damn old. 1985. but anyways. someone suggested we watched band of brothers, the episode on the medic. episode 6. and we watched it for about 20 mins jus before we sent arms. heh and hey jem ah dun tell anyone about this k.
but anyways. then jus before booking out, this mrf sergeant screamed at my bunkmates for no reason. ok lah. he thought someone from our bunk shouted 'knees off the ground!' when he was punishing them. prob from platoon 4. but anyways. i resent the fact that when we said we were innocent, he was like, 'i don't care! get the person who shouted that down NOW!'.
f***ing bastard who prob cant even pass his ippt and/or get into sispec thinks he's so great and cant/wont admit his mistake. he's jus a pathetic sergeant lor. Local sergeant, may i humbly add. which makes him jus the same rank as me if he were to go into some other unit.
damnit, i wonder if he even Deserves the rank of a Cpl, he prob doesnt even f***ing know section movements and stuff.
yeah i f***ing HATE such people who 1. don't know their f***ing place in the army and 2. can't admit their mistakes. still makes my blood boil, jus thinking about it.

BUt then. i booked out. went to thomson plaza to buy a birthday present for my sis. and saw this damn chio girl. yeah i think she's Damn pretty i tell ya. not the conventional blonde-beyond-shoulder-length-hair-heavily-made-up-skinny-like-some-starved-ethiopian-and-acts-like-some-slut kinda pretty.
pretty pretty.

aww damn.

a few years ago i woulda said im in love. not too long ago i'd have said im now madly infatuated with her.
but the thing is today im like jus... admiring her beauty. yeah. not thinking about anything else. like wanting to be her boyfriend or sth.

now. i can only think of these few reasons y i dun feel anything.
1. i no longer believe in love at first sight.
2. i don't want to get attached for like jus a short while and break a girl's heart.
3. i know its my hormones that are like egging me on.
4. i have no confidence to go after any girl now.
5. i cant be Bothered to go after any girl now.

and Yet. im desperate for a girlfriend now.

interesting huh.

'Guard yourself against impulses which will induce you to talk too much about your ideas or your problems. Serious circulatory disorders will regress in a spectacular manner. Refrain from all passionate feeling for a person whom you don't yet know well.'

hmm.

saw some stuff last night and this morning. ok people, rather.
while walking home saw this family in the park. old grandma in a wheelchair. maid looking bored. middle-aged couple jus relaxing with her. acs grandson walking home and greeted enthusiastically by his cute dog.
on the mrt there was this forlorn-looking lady holding a bouquet of flowers on the mrt. going back home, i should think.
at the jazz bar, i saw this girl furtively writing... notes? diary entries? a v-day card? on these pieces of tissue paper.
and oh yah. the bassist of the band was playing a 5-string bass. some guy from creative. nice guitar, man. damn nice.
oh yeah this morning i saw two couples. and a father with his daughter. these two couples. one was like my age. both guy and girl. the other was this rather old couple. old grandfather-like figure with a crutch and his wife supporting him.

made me think about stuff. relationships. no not just guy-girl relationships. musician-audience relationships. grandparent-grandchild relationships. parent-child relationships. u know, the like.
its interesting, u know, what you can see around you when you really observe. take time to 'smell the roses', they say.

and oh yeah. a note to myself. i Need to remember why i want to do well in this course. yep so i got 45 out of 50 for this first test.
i'll need to do as well, if not better, in the next test.
'cause i love wat i'm doing now.
i want to become a combat spec.
i want to prove to myself that my fire will not fizz out as it has done in the past. yeah. its always been a spectacular result for the first test - then everything goes downhill from there.
that will Not happen this time.

but oh yeah. i think i've Really become more desperate. for a mate that is. no. not physical mate :P a soulmate. yeah know it wouldnt last and stuff but i dunno lah. this afternoon after taking the test we were like damn free... some guys were reading FHM. the steph song issue. (oh yeah did i mention i dun really find her hot? i dunno Y so many guys are like so crazy about her. she's like jus... normal? i mean ok lah. jus a bit more chio. so wat. ???)
but anyways. yeah. i wasnt in the Least interested at all lor. steph song... paris hilton... some actresses or models trying to look hot... i dunno lah. maybe i've been affected by the book i've jus read. tony parsons's man and wife. haha yeah i know its a crap book but somehow i feel like i can relate to the guy. there's this part where he says something about searching for a feeling that i've experienced before. jus... yeah. trying to get that feeling again. and again. and again.
jus hafta ignore this yearning. its jus Not gonna do anything for me man.
i'm lucky i havent experienced that feeling again jus yet.
ironic isnt it. i know its not gonna do any good to me, yet i still want it.
sigh. i think its jus my hormones talking lah.

i've got my bass guitar!!!
i've got my bass guitar!!!
haha i've finally got it! the 500 bucks, comes with an amp and tuner, (oxygenated) blood red colour one. cant have the chance to try it though. amp has some weird 3-pin thingy. hafta go buy some adaptor or multi-plug. sigh.
but i've got meself a bass!!!!!
heh

haha had a fun walk today. jungle trail, sentosa. u should try it lah, especially at night. with a girl.
was dared by a girl to walk in it today. yeah. that's right. She dared Me. haha.
kinda reminded me of tekong lah. section field camp, i think. walking in the dark... cant see where you're going... good wide track for u to walk on, though. wont get your shoes dirty.
but im sidetracking. thing is, its fun walking such dark places with a girl. can scare her. haha.
anyways.
oh yah let's welcome a new reader of my blog!!!! *cheers* yay!!!!! ^_^
another person who's gonna know my *other* side. my not-so-often revealed side.
And. i got a new teacher. to teach me how to... be a dependable guy. haha. only thing is i dun have anyone to show how dependable i am lor. not interested in any girls i know now lah :P
and another thing. im doing fire piquet tomorrow!!!!!!! aaaaaaah!!!!!!!!!!!! under sgt bakar!!!!! aaaaaaaah!!!!!!!!! ok lah i know he's not dat bad a guy lah. but still. aaaaaah!!!!!!!
i hate duties man. so unfair. jus because im the first bed And am in the first section i hafta kana like such stuff. so suay rite??? kau.

jus hafta put this down. saw Lots of flowers today. think its kinda fun, choosing... picking... arranging flowers. i mean, ok lah it Seems fun. heh maybe one day i'll show off my flower-arranging skills to a gal and impress her with my excellent taste. haha