Living the Dream

One Saturday when I was helping to clean the ward, I asked the man in charge how he was doing.  He looked me in the eye and said, "Living the dream."  I have taken that and used it as my own response when people ask me how I am doing.

I was talking to Robin yesterday at Amanda's wedding and I explained that it was really good that I went to East Germany on my mission.  On my mission, I learned to appreciate the bare necessities.  I remember the apartment where we had to build fires to keep warm.  I remember the split where there was a VERY limited amount of hot/warm water.  I remember the month in a new companionship when the companion had already spent most of her money for the month before she was transferred and we survived on the money that I had left for that month.  Then there was the other companion that spent all her money and I once again helped our companionship float until the next month.  These were all experiences that formed who I am.  I expect little and am appreciative for anything and everything. 

So how does this all tie in?  Well, things are pretty stressful right now.  But I can still say I am living the dream.  I have running hot and cold water.  I have heat and electricity.  My family is healthy (maybe not mentally, but that is a subject for another time).  I have a job.  We have food.  We are very blessed. 

So Tired

I went to bed at 7:00 PM last night and I didn't wake up until 10:00 AM this morning. Then I took a three hour nap today.  I know it is from depression.  I need to get on top of this. 

Life Changing Events

After 18 years of working at the church, Don quit his job September 1st.  He says the atmosphere has been far from heavenly.  It was hard for him to work with the individuals in the office.  Don has been elated to be away from his job.  He has been working hard at home trying to clean the house and keep everyone fed. 

One might ask how I am taking it...I am in survival mode.  I know that Don needed to get a different job.  It just seemed like such a toxic atmosphere. But the stress that I feel is overpowering.  I now carry the benefits for the family.  I am stressed with the knowledge that I am the sole provider for the family when I just don't feel like a mother should have to work.  I really think that when Don gets another job, he will make more than he was and it will be better for our family in the long run. 

The contrast between Don's and my stress are very divergent.  Don feels happy for the first time in a long time.  I, on the other hand, have been very grumpy and short with people.  I have had a headache all week.  I went in to InstaCare yesterday and I have a UTI infection.  I switched our insurance to my name and they couldn't find me in the system at InstaCare and at the pharmacy.  I finally just payed cash to get the antibiotics. 

I stayed up all night because I didn't feel well and I took today off.  Hopefully I will feel better by tomorrow because I have no choice but to be at the top of my game.